Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum Cobalt's Office of Security - Super, sexy 70's addition

C'mon Caliente, let's go to Rockhoppers for that Girl's Night. Staying here seems like a dangerous idea.

Everyone out!

<ushers everyone into Security Office courtyard in the middle of the square>

Space Ranger, thank the stars you're around...you're the only one with even the slightest bit of sense. Cesspool that's the Office of Security...you people are all insane and the reason there is a cesspool to begin with! How can anyone work on a variety of major cases, when I have to keep sending the understaffed janitorial staff (sans their leader) to clean up after you!

And Frio, you're not getting a dime, hon! Quislet, Esq. is my personal lawyer and the Security Office isn't paying you anything. There's a disclaimer for even enterting it--you've put yourself at risk! Jeepers! From an intense, hot night to lawyers and jilted lovers--and I didn't even witness the reasons why...

You all need to get it through your heads that the Security Officers are relatively invulnerable in the confines of the Security Office. The five or six of you have no chance of beating Space Ranger. I think I'll popcorn and watch him mop this little party up.

(I need to get back to my old job of demoralizing young women for LMB spy secrets...)

goodnite girls


Abusive sod of man that Kid who runs this office is, isn't he?

Well I'm off to redecorate the SUDL.

She's right Ranger. Ester's law states that his future is not ours, but only one of a few possiblities that could be ours. Even if it threatens to destroy his future, we don't have to worry, because entropy and timestream malfunctions correct themselves in a non-specific way that allows life to continue on unhindered, despite miner (and even major) changes to those lives. I've dealt with alternate timelines before--just run with it.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

Who said we were fighting Space Ranger?? We were trying to save Disaster Boy from the Cosmopolitan King guy!!

Ummm... Cobie lets go into your office and verify that the security cameras recorded everything...

Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(And I'll get you some breath mints and you can put your pants on and...)

Ranger, I don't know what's going on...I've been out hunting for Vee all night--had a battle with a couple of Khund pirate ships...

I think we need to hire more interns to keep the hallways clear...I know this nice little girl named Tulla Mor'dooh, I think you'd like her...

<sees wreckage from recent battle>

Yeah, I guess I should watch those tapes.

Hey guys don't eat that Dover sole fillet.

Watch those hands Cobalt Kid. I will not be air deprived again because of you!

What do you mean I don't get a dime!?! It's YOUR FAULT that LUNA went CRAZY and tried to KILL me!!!!! All I wanted was a job. To help people. Etc.

Instead, I got Barbarians dropped on and groping me, a boss with no sense of morality (actually, that I liked) and suffocated twice in as many days! And it's at least partially your fault! I want some kind of compensation and I WANT IT NOW!!!!

Chilly, relax I recommend getting a lawyer. He'll use this outburst against you, kid. Now go have fun at Rockhoppers.

Later.

Uh... yeah, I'll meet you at Rokkhopper's Frio. Peace out.

<flies far, far away from the crazy>

Sentient, perhaps you should take possession of that... After all when we get DB back you're going to have to repair that damage.

Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Or Else...)

How is it my fault? I have no idea why Luna is acting crazy--hell, for all I know, she actually is crazy to begin with! I thought she wanted a man or something...why'd she attack you?

And I doubt there's a place on LW that you'd be safe from Hrun. He pretty much goes where he pleases.

And if you're looking for some sort of compensation, anything you have in mind besides money or property?

<puts hand on shoulder gently>

No sense of morality when it comes to casual sexual relationships, well then yes. But I do have a strong sense of what's right--it's what I've dedicated my life to.

So, I'm a cad and a rogue. I know. But there's plenty of ways to settle this

DON'T CALL ME CHILLY!!!!!!

*drops a new layer of snow and ice on everything*

I will not be calm! You people are enough to drive a woman to the dark side! Gah!

<Pushes CK's hand off Frio. Hands him Dover sole>

Here take this Cobie.

Go to Rockhoppers' Frio have fun.

I'll handle this, your staying here impairs your chances of getting a fair settlement.

She attacked me because of Hrun and YOU. Emphasis on the YOU! Plus, I was only here when Hrun and the Tiger avitar were fighting because it (was) my job!

I don't care about that sutpid brute. He gropes fine. But when I get strangled because of it, heads will roll!

As for the compensation, what are you offering. If we can come to a mutually beneficial agreement, then I'm game. If not, I'm finding a lawyer and suing you for everything your worth.

Listen to Tamper Lad Frio!! Let's have some fuuun already.

Ah, is this another victim of your illegal Britishizer ray? You seem to have a tendency to do violence, Tamper.

Rather against the very nature of your themes to better Legion World, correct?

Who is this being? Disaster Boy? Cosmopolitan King?

What about your unionizing of Legion World? Any luck with that? Because I've seen very little activity all night when I was working. yet, here you were, flirting with Caliente and Frio, when the citizens of Legion World [sarcasm]need you [/sarcasm].

<notices note on desk. It reads:

"Hey Cobie, thanks for the flowers you sent my mother! I'll have to repay you! *tee hee* Love, Jailbait Lass">

(Ah Lolita, what a good kid...)

Don't condescend to me. Caliente might've liked that but I'm my own woman! And I can fight my own battles, thank you very much.

But *kiss on cheek* it was ver nice of you to offer to help. Guess evil geniuses aren't allll bad.

And, you, Caliente, stay out of this.

OOPS,
**Purr**
Damm 1/2 second too late!



(GOTCHA!)
**Purr**

There are more ways to get something pleasurable than money or property. I know quite a few.

And I had hopes for you for this Office--I bet you would have made one fine Security Officer.

I'm just trying to help y'know. You don't have to be a jerk.

(Keep my secret and I'll keep yours cat. Ain't karma a bastich?)

I you, doorknob!

I never said my crusade would be non-violent CK, simply that the end result would be glorious.

As for the unionizing, well I took the night off, I had to go off-world for a celebration in my honour. Well your staff has kinda fallen apart because they went postal again anyways Kid.

Now DB seems to have been sent to some future. I don't know if it's our future or if the very presence of CosKing here means that the timelines have diverged.

Now excuse me, I'm off to redecorate the SUDL.

Stoopid Cat, do I get catnip as well?