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Gosh, Lardy, you're looking good for all you've been through.

Er..what are all these people doing in here with legal papers? Maybe you better go read all your past adventures before you sign anything. I don't think you ever promised to sell that guy your house for $5.

So, what have the doctors got planned to restore your memory?


Holy Cats of Egypt!
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Hello, old friend.

<walks over to Lardy's bedside, sits>

Remember me? We had some fun and dangerous times together.

I brought you this.

<hands him Lardy's original walking ring, certified LMB issue>

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<Lardy's eyes widen>

GET HIM OUT OF HERE!!!


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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<Clive is shocked>

Father--this is your best friend in all the universe. Why would you want him out?

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I...I don't know why, Clive, but...the sight of him makes me feel nothing but hatred...fear...revulsion!

<eyes and hands begin to flare with blue fire>

Just...GET HIM OUT!!!! PLEASE!!!!


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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<takes a stunned, but strangely calm, Cobalt Kid firmly by the arm>

I'm sorry, Mr. Cobaltus, but he's clearly upset...please...

<Cobalt removes Clive's grip>

"That's not necessary, Clive...I'll go..."

<glances back at his friend for a moment, then leaves>

<Clive sees the glow from Lardy subside>

Are...are you feeling better now, father?

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yes...thank you, Clive.

<takes a drink of water>

I..can't explain it. You're sure he was my friend?

<Clive, Rocky and Stealth nod>

I...just don't know...

<he closes his eyes and struggles in vain to remember>

<Stealth massages his temples and soothes him>>


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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<excuses himself for a moment>

<withdraws his portable omnicom>

Ms. Shady...this is Clive.

Yes, there's been a change. He's reacted negatively, violently even, to Mr. Cobaltus on his first visit for some unknown reason.

I don't know...is it possible that Mr. Cobaltus, of all people, harmed father in some way?

<conversation continues for a few moments more...>

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strange but not a stranger
strange but not a stranger
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*As Quislet, Esq. leaves Lard Lad's hospital room, he sees his fiance, Roy (formerly known as the Royal Inquisitor). with Roy is a shadowy figure - a very buff sahdowy figure. As Quislet, Esq. approaches the two, the shadowy figure goes to a door to the stairwell.*

Hey Roy! Who were you talking to?

Roy: No one! Um.. it was just an orderly. Say, how's Lard Lad?

Physically he's fine, but he's like a blank slate mentally. He's eating some pizza right now. Hey are you hungry? We could grab some lunch now. Maybe head over to may place for dessert *Quislet, Esq. pinches Roy's butt.*

Um maybe some other time honeybunch. I, uh, I have some things to do. I may have a lead on a job.

*Roy leaves with Quislet, Esq. watching him suspiciously.*


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
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<later, finds Cobalt in the hospital lobby>

Excuse me, Mr. Cobaltus...can you give me any insight as to why my father reacted that way to you?!?!?

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I'm sorry Clive, but I cannot.

I--<sighs>. Sorry.

<returns to the RMB>

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Well, well, well. I didn't realize this was the nut ward.

Just think, I come here to help cheer up a few patients in the terminal ward and what do I find?

Why a sight that cheers me up!

Welcome back LardButt! Get better quick!

So I can beat your sorry lard-butt a few more times.


Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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<sees Gary>

Hey! I...I think I remember you--or at least similarly to the way I 'remembered' that Cobalt guy I wanted to fry earlier--feelings, really...gut instinct...

...except with you, it's...different--like, the opposite of how I felt when I first saw him.

Were we, like, best friends? Please stay and tell me more!


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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<Stares at lard Lad Thoughtfully>

Amnesia?

No, we weren't friends. <shakes head sadly> You were too far under Cobalt Kid's thumb for us to ever be friends but that doesn't have to be the way things are now.

You saved all of us, the entire world. You laid down your life to defeat the Computer Tyrant and Cobalt took credit for your heroism.

Open your eyes and really look at what's going on here on Legion World.

Then I think we'll be friends.


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I...I did all that?

<thinks>

And what you said would explain my reaction to that Cobalt Kid earlier--I don't trust him.

I'd be more than willing to listen to your point of view...if you have time, that is.


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Listening to my point of view won't really tell you much...

Watch what I do, watch what Cobalt does, and Clive, and Faraway, and Nova Girl, and anyone else you have questions about, what we do is important.

What we say, not so much...


Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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Good Evening Mr Concord, how nice of you to drop in.

Planning any more atempts to conquer Legion World this month.


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<on his own, thinking about Gary's words>

Well, unlike many of the others, Gary's encouraging me to think for myself instead of telling me how I ought to act like this "Lard Lad".

<walks to nurse station>

Nurse? Does this hospital have a library? It does? On the ground floor?

<Stealth accompanies him and shows him how to use the archive computers>

"Got it, Lardy?"

Yeah, I think so, Stealth. Thanks.

"No problem. I'm going to step out to the cafeteria for a snack for a few. Want anything?"

Um, yeah--could you get me a piece of pizza to go?

"Sure thing, but you'll have to wait and eat it after you get back to your room. Be back, soon."

Bye. <he stares after her for a long moment> Man, I like her...a lot! But I don't know if she feels...

<he's interrupted by a beep displaying his search results>

Yeesh--more than a million hits? Well, I'll read 'em all if I have to--ntil I know what I need to about my 'buddy' Cobalt Kid....

<displays first file>


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<after about 30 minutes>

Damn! I've barely scratched the surface, but from what I've read, Cobalt Kid is either, at best, a narcissist whose complete vanity occasionally puts others in harm's way...or at worst, potentially the biggest threat to peace in the galaxy!

<sees Stealth re-entering the library>

I've gotta upload some of this to my room's Omnicom. Hmmm...that looks interesting. An unauthorized biography by one S. Lim.

<uploads>

<Stealth appears beside him>

"Reading anything interesting?"

Uh...not really. I feel I can trust her, but then again she could be in league with Cobalt... I'm actually feeling pretty tired. Mind if I excuse myself to my room for the night?

"No problem, Lardy" <holds out bag> "Here's your pizza."

Thanks, Stealth. <hugs her> Seeya tomorrow?

"Sure thing!"

<both leave...Stealth to her home, Lardy back to his room at the psyche ward>


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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If Lardy finds that archived footage of me hosting the 'Ms. Mayavale University Contest 3005' that should pretty much put the last nail in the coffin eek

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<Lardy has been in the hospital still receiving in-patient memory therapy since we last saw him. While his memory has not improved, he has been occupying himself by heavily researching the LMB's own Cobalt Kid...>

It's inescapable... <he writes in his Omnicom> ...Cobalt Kid has been implicated in countless major crimes...chief among those: genocide! I can't believe he's gone this long without so much as an inquiry, let alone a trial! That poor "Slim" guy...his despair obviously drove him insane and lead to his involvement in that "Five Faces of Death" thing a few months back that supposedly cost me my life.

That must be why I had such an inate negative reaction to my supposed friend when he visited me here. I must've known what he did! Who knows...maybe he had me killed to cover his tracks!

I must find Slim and learn more...but how?


<puts Omnicom down, clenches his fists and speakss aloud>

Gary Concord--I bet he'll help me!


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<checking out at front desk>

"Are you sure you want to check out, Mr. Taylor? The doctor's are still hopeful--"

Miss, I've made pretty much no progress here. If I have any hope of recovering my memory, I feel it lies in the outside world. I have a home and means of supporting myself. I'll be fine.

And I promise to continue out-patient therapy. Well?

<she looks at his chart> "Well...your doctors code you as 'voluntary', Mr. Taylor. If you're sure, then sign here..."

<signs, then exits hospital>

Now...it's time to start doing what needs to be done--to bring Cobalt Kid to justice!


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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<days later, Cobalt Kid enters>

"Greetings Mr. Cobalt! What a pleasure!"

"The pleasure is all mine Nurse. Have you lost weight? And that outfit..."

<nurse blushes>

"Well, I believe I'll start on the East Wing today"

"Go right ahead Cobie!"

<Cobalt walks from sick bed to sick bed, using his powers to heal each sick person, and whispering comfort into their ears>

"I-I'm s-so sick, Cobie..." says a young boy with a case of space-pocks.

"Now, now Tiny Tym, let me tell you this joke about Poverty Lad while I heal you..." replies Cobalt as the other nurses get weepy at this act.

<time passes>

"Ah, Mr. Xophtlkok, still here, I see?"

"Indeed. It's been quiet around here lately."

"Oh? Did you have a guest or something before then?"

"You know very well I did. I was laying next to Lard Lad himself! Just one hospital cosmic-bed over."

"Why don't you tell me all about it, while I heal you, old fellow? I'll take away some of that pain...and you tell me every single detail."

<Cobalt looks up out the window, past the skies, into space, smiling>

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<arrives with Sir Roy at admissions>

Um...hi, I'm back. 'Home sweet home' and all, I guess.

"Yes, Mr. Taylor. Rockhopper Lad called ahead. You are to undergo extensive psychological testing, as well as the very latest in identity authentication. During visiting hours, you may receive guests from a list of up to five names you leave us. Do you know who they will be?"

Yes. Gary Concord. Rockhopper Lad. Sir Roy. Faraway Lad. And Jailbait Lass.

<turns to Sir Roy>

Thank you, friend. No matter what happens, I'll always appreciate what you did for me.

<they embrace and Roy leaves>

<Lardy is fitted with a power inhibitor and lead off to a secure part of the psych ward>


Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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<Looks in on the sedated, sleeping form of Lard Lad.>

I assume you believe me now. They won't believe anything until something drastic happens.

It was the same on my Legion World. Cobalt could do no wrong...

Until the day his schemes and plans collapsed and the Red Bee and his LVMBP were waiting...

I won't let that happen here...

<Leaves, silently>


Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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