Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum Breaking up is hard to do

OK, a little background:

My father died last September, and I was having some trouble afterwards... mostly from the perspective that I never let myself express any grief b/c I played the strong, stoic one for the benefit of my family and left it all bottled up inside...

So I went to therapy in order to have an outlet for the grief...

And it worked; I feel better...

But now I feel that I have gotten all I am going to get out of therapy, and I have tried to break up with my therapist twice, telling him I am done and want no more...

And he keeps telling me that I'm not done and have other things to work on (well, who doesn't?) and that I should stay in therapy...

And like an idiot I keep saying OK and showing up the next week...

It shouldn't be this hard to stop therapy, should it?

For me the two main questions would be -

Does it make you feel better?

Is it too expensive?

If you are comfortable within yourself then let it go, if you (and only you) feel you need more then go for that.

What Harbinger said. You are the one who decides if you should stop or not. If you want to stop, just tell your therapist that you are done. Most therapists want one more session to discuss the ending of therapy. Again, it's up to you whether you want to do that or not.

It's also not like you can't ever go back for more therapy, either with this therapist or another.

I am glad that therapy helped you.

Thanks, guys, I appreciate the input. I think the biggest problem is that I kinda enjoy talking to the guy, but it is far too expensive to maintain based on what I am getting out of it at this point ($125 per weekly session! No insurance reimbursement!). While there may be some things that it would be nice to "work on" or "explore," it feels more like I'm playing around at this point, wasting time and money, and I've just been too wishy washy in trying to put a lid on it. Looks like I need to get my ass in gear!

Meet him for lunch instead. Gossip a little, then slip a few issues into the conversation. If he begins to suspect that you are getting free advice, twirl your hair around your finger and check out the waiter's ass.

Hey Rokk--I went to therapy for a while a few years ago after my mother's death. My therapist didn't want me to stop either when I told her I felt I was done. Basically, she just wanted to keep talking about me being gay--and I had LONG since resolved all of that. If YOU are feeling better, and YOU feel like stopping--then stop.

If you feel that you have gotten what you needed out of therapy then just stop going and start canceling the appoitments.

The sessions are for you. You got the help you needed to deal with the probelm at hand. Tell that to him and use the cash to buy more comic books!

Rokk-

I think the board has it. It seems maybe the therapist is trying to dig into your wallet..or maybe he feels better talking to you, so you should charge him.

You definitely need to dump him. He's obviously stringing you along to get more money. The point of therapy is to solve whatever problem you went in there to deal with, not with everything the therapist thinks you need. In fact, I'd be mighty tempted to report this guy to your insurance company so that he can be avoided by others.

Hey Rokky, sorry to hear about your troubles last year...

Your therapist is obviously being very consciencious and caring that he keeps saying you should come back.... either that or like the rest of us fancies you rotten

I can only echo the advice above - If you don't feel you need it don't do it....

Similarly, I went for therapy last year after a lot of things got on top of me, mainly due to work and bastard ex Boyf, and thankfully it was paid for through work for the first six sessions, after that it was crunch time - pay £85 per hour or stop.... being a typical Aberdonian I stopped (pay? we don't do that!!! ) but it was difficult to do as I enjoyed those six hours of total unguarded honesty in a nonjudgemental environment....

Whatever you decide

I can't believe this is still on page one! You LWers are so wonderful and caring and ready to give advice. (Do I sound like Sally Field? You like me! You really, really like me!) I'm just so repeatedly impressed by the sense of community here, all the time. What a great place!

I think the consensus is right, and I thank you all for stating your opinion. And Knowjack, that is almost EXACTLY what is going on with me as well~! Yikes!

I haven't actually stopped yet, but now I feel I have the resolve to go in there and be firm about it next time.

Thanks, guys!