Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum When Shark Lad Attacks! Season Ten begins on page 6!

Yes, at last! My own talk show, where I have guests come on the show, and instead of asking them questions, I try to get them to talk about me and ask me questions about myself!

I'm going to need a goofy sidekick ASAP, as I'm prone to be bored and lazy and will most likely forget about this thread within days, thus cancelling the show by proxy! I'm looking at you, Eryk!

How to be a guest? Well, beats me! Just come up on stage and have a seat.

Yay! This is a great chance to follow in the footsteps of my idol, Andy Richter!

I'd be honored to be your first guest.

*Sitting in comfortable chair* I like the set Cobie! So tell me how did you come up with this idea for a talk show?

Why, I was looking in the mirror this morning and I thought--those poor Legion Worlders aren't elite enough to actually hang out with me! They don't get to see my handsome features! Thus, I figured that they could all huddle around the TV's in store windows and bask in my great looks.

What do you think Quis? Should I have dancing boys and girls do a musical number at the start of each show?

Oh, I think that would just distract people unnecessarily from thinking about you, Cobie. I'd suggest a montage of you in your daily activities or of you as a youngster.

Is it true that you have all the interns wear Cobalt Kid masks?

Of course! I also make them refer to themselves as 'I, the intern of Cobalt Kid,'. It helps keep them grounded.

Cobie, it really is an honour to invite myself onto your show. I've been outside the studio, admiring your statue. You certainly are shorter in real life! Why is that?

That's because I'm sitting silly!

No pull up a chair and have some of this concoction that Dr. Mayavale donated to the show. Let's discuss the important issues, like that time I saved Legion World from a possible Civil War with my clear thinking, heartless manipulation and dashing good looks!

You are so funny, Cobie!

*rassum frassum*

I want to be the announcer!

Live from Legion World Studios, it's the Cobalt Kid Show, starring Cobalt Kid, with Eryk Davis Ester!

Joining us tonight:

From the Super Law Offices of Space, Quislet, Esq!

From Cramer's Cafe, Fat Cramer!

Musical guest, Ferrosmith!

Plus Stupid Super-pet tricks!

And now: Heeeeeeeeerrrrre's Cobie!

OKAY, EVERYBODY OUT!

I've only got ten minutes to get this set cleaned up before the next show starts taping!

Now who the heck would stick a wad of chewing gum there?

:pops bubblegum bubble: Wasn't me! :chews bubblegum loudly:

So, Cobie, what's your proudest accomplishment?

Before you answer that, Cobie, I really think you and your audience should know that Quislet, esq. has been faking it since 2958... AND he stole my husband. <sob>

Hello Cobie.
Thank you so much for allowing me to be on your show.

# sits on the sofa opposite Cobie's solid gold throne with red satin cushions #

So my question is what lucky four or five ladies will be getting to spend the christmas holidays with you? Or will you go and visit your dear old mum?

Can't believe you are all encouraging him. You know how big Cobie's head gets. This is likely to make it explode!

Aren't I though? Hired! Welcome aboard Matt, grab a bottle of absinthe, the entire cast and crew get them each day!

Have a sit Arachne! Perhaps you can help us solve the great mystery of our time: why would any sentient ever want to harm the legendary poster known as Cobalt Kid? Being my bodyguard, I'm sure you have lots of great stories about stalkers trying to kill me, although I was probably too preoccupied with saving Legion World to notice.
This is a tough one, considering the almost each day I accomplish things so important that one citizen or another will tell me they've never been prouder. But giving it great thought, it would probably have to be the day the fifth great statue of Cobalt Kid was erected in Legion World Square and I donated it to the people of Legion World themselves, so they now have a place to come and pay homage to on the holidays, to give them a little bit of light if times get tough. The fact that my incredibly handsome visage gives them a little bit of reassurance that people really can be that naturally atractive probably helps.

Oh, and there was also that time I defended Legion World from evil Stubots while in the form of a giant amoeba.

<consoles FC>

Here, here, FC, come closer and let your feelings out. What people don't realize is that in addition to 'faking it' since 2958, Quis has been known to be 'shaking it' as well, which gets the boys in quite a frenzy. Luckily for him, rampant stealing of other people's spouses and paramours falls under '10 Things Cobalt said is relatively okay to do', so we can't be too mad at him. Luckily, I have enough love to share to make up for that.
Well, these days everyone knows that the #1 lady in my life is Princess Crujectra, who is more than enough to keep this handsome rogue satisfied. Fortunately for Legion World, this has freed up 45% of my time, as I used to spend that time getting into and running out of (usually at gunpoint) various relationships. Now I get to spend it doing more productive things, like running for leader on the 'Caligula-style campaign' and starting this talk-show. Aren't you all lucky?

Of course, Jailbait Lass will be along for the holidays, as the legendary poster known as Cobalt Kid has trouble putting wrapping paper on presents.

Why, I almost think you think I'm a little full of myself Vee!

Stole your husband??? More like rescued him.

Oh the things he has told me about you. Well, I am too much of a gentleman to repeat them in public.

That's really fascinating, Quislet. But could we talk about Cobie some more?

Well Eryk, the viewers may be assured that the things FC's husband told Quis about FC were actually inspired by a pair of home movies that I filmed during my stay at Mayavale University two or three years back. I’ve tried to keep quiet about them, considering a certain two celebrities were also involved…

…that being said, I’m quite impressive on film and we actually invented two new ‘techniques’ that may be what Quis is referring to.

(Satan Claws indeed! )

I swear, people... this is NOT my fault...

I'll be more than willing to talk about Cobie once a certain person of the feline persuasion is escorted off the stage.

*glares evilly at Fat Cramer*

There's something appropo about Quis having a catfight with... well a cat.

I wonder if Cobie's ever had a catfight?

This talk show is decidedly high brow (even though its just fluff interviews with LMB celebrities). I think a LMB talkshow in the style of Jerry Springer would do better.