Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum The Lonely Hearts Club

Scat is right when he says sex and romance are seperate issues to love.

Staying in love with someone is bloody hard work, and both parties have to make the effort or it's going to end in tears.

After a little over ten years with Alan there's one thing we've learned - don't be scared to tell someone what you feel, and be patient as others try to tell you what they have to say. Don't try to score points, just be honest. Sometimes it's difficult and sometimes it hurts but it's always worthwhile.

Hopefully

"What Is Love?" A philosopher once asked.

The humans in the room struggled to answer that question. His cat merely rolled her eyes, gave a short burst of <silent cat Laughter> and wandered away.

The cat knew something that humans struggle to understand.

Love and sex are two completely different subjects, and neither has very much to do with romantic entanglements (which are usually created by preexisting notions or fantasies that one human has about another human, IE, He/She is sooo hot! He/She must be a great lover. OR! He/She is such a dog! Who would want to hook up with that?) and/or the potential for future happiness.

Now, some of you may be reluctant to take advice from a cat, but consider carefully a few things...

1. Is your partner's happiness equally (or more) important to you than your own happiness? Conversely, does your partner feel The same way?
(if either answer is no, SCAT!)

2. Don't be afraid to meet people and get to know them, even if the situation is slightly uncomfortable. But, please note that a "Roll in the hay" is not getting to know someone, No One sthupps all day and night! You'll spend a majority of your time with your significant other with both of you fully dressed. Do you like each other just as much then?

3. Doing something because everyone else is is usually a bad idea. If and when you make a personal choice to do something (especially for the first time) it should be because you feel it is right for you, not because someone else beat you to it and you feel like you need to catch up to the KEWL KIDS! (who may be lying about it anyway).

And above all else remember this!

You are not the only person in the world who has emotions. Every bit of fear, doubt, and uncertainty you have ever felt about your relationships has been felt by others, often the other person in your relationship. Open and honest discussions about such feelings are extremely difficult and best handled with extreme care but can also be the key to building a lasting and loving relationship.

Sage advice, Stoopid Cat.

I understand, intellectually, the wisdom that has been shared. But it's overcoming the fear of experiencing that I'm working on. I dread the possibility of failure so much that I tend to cancel out any possibility of success along with it. I'm a goofapotamus!

A loveable goofapotamus.

Misty, if that's true, you have plenty of company out there in Goofapotamus Land. The fear of failure is a common problem for most young people when they consider the relationship landscape.

"Is it better to have loved and lost or to never have loved at all?"

Old Billy really asked a wonderful question when he wrote that line...

The honest answer is that we are all destined to experience that dilemma and must each find our own answer to that question.

Being an old (very happily) married man I can tell you one thing that is totally and irrefutably true. No person can totally live up to someone else's expectations of them.

I'm married to a goddess. Scratch that. I'm married to a GODDESS!!! (And not just in LW terms either )

But sometimes, she disappoints me. Not anywhere near as often as I disappoint her, but on occasion it happens.

When it happens we find a way to work things out. It's hard (just as Belinda so eloquently said) but we are both willing to work at it.

The point here is that relationships require TWO (or more, if you live in Utah) People actively involved in making them work.

Arranged dates aren't the only way to meet new people. Explore every avenue open to you. Look past the initial impressions and try to see the person behind the facade. Odds are that person is just as scared as you are where the expectations are concerned.

EDE, I LOVE the Moody Blues!

Here's a question for y'all:

If you could go through life having either true friendships, or true love, but not both... which you would choose?

True friendships with frequent, meaningless casual sex would work for me!

Oh, Lou, what are we going to do with you?

I have a couple of ideas...

Can't a shoot a cannon at you, point blank of course?

Erm, that's one idea.

Not sure it's the way I would go though...

Don't worry, I'll enjoy it.

I'm sure you would. Not so sure I'd feel the same way.

Well, you won't be feeling much of anything when it's done.

C'mon now, that's not nice.

Who said anything about being nice?

Umm, actually Miss T. did.

Well is she here right now, no.

*kicks him in the shins*

Why you gotta be like that?

The line is "Why you gotta do me like that?" or is that just Cali thing.

Would you have preferred if I aimed for the loser jewels?

True love, because that also involves true friendship.

Oh, yeah? They were my first concert, ever.

Justin Hayward has got to be near the top of my favorite singers, and few can match him in the raw beauty of his songs.

They would have been mine, had I been allowed to go.

I did get to seem them later, though, with Stevie Ray Vaughn as opening act.