Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum How I am spending the summer of 2006...

Thanks Quis

Well, today is three weeks since surgery, and to celebrate I went with Scott over to my parents house to meet a couple friends for more cleaning and sorting and packing. I swore that I would take it easy and not overdo, but I so lied.

While Scott and Steve took loads of furniture over to our home in Steve's beater Mazda pickup, I helped Mindy tear through my folks' bedroom and closets. She is like a Marine drill sargeant! She kicked ass on my parents' junk and just kept pulling things out of the closets and drawers and from under the bed and tossing them at me to make the decisions. I found myself straining to keep up with her, and feeling like a loser for not working as hard.

Then when she found a project that took a bit of time, I stood at the kitchen sink and washed all the antique glassware before packing it away. For some reason it really grossed me out to think of bringing all this beautiful old glass into the house wearing a 25 year old coat of dust and grime. So the glassware was sparkling and I admired each piece for about 10 seconds and then wrapped it up in bubble wrap and packed it.

I think working 9AM to 6PM may have been too much for me. I think this because I have grabbed the bottle of pain pills again. This is my first narcotic pain pill in a whole week. I was making it okay on Advil.

But, this is a minor setback and perfectly understandable. I will be fine tomorrow, or the next day, and I continue to heal!!!! Really I think this operation may have been the best thing for me ever. I believe I will feel better then I have for the past 20 years once I get all healed. I've been crying easier and over the least little things, but it doesn't last too long and it isn't bothering me. All in all, I even think some of my bad moods and tendancy toward depression may have been because I was in more pain then I even knew.

Mindy looked at me today, even though we were all hot and sweaty and wearing ponytails and had handkerchiefs tied around our heads, and she told me that I looked really good today. She said the tension was out of my face. Hey, that's a plus

Hugs and kisses for everyone !!!!

Glad to hear you're feeling better and stronger. Don't overstress (is that a word?)yourself and before you know it you'll be back to your old self - or should that be your new, improved self?

Shame on you!

I hope you've been taking it easier since then.

hi Caroline !!

i'm really glad to hear you are doing so well after your operations !! and it's good to see you in such high spirits, i'm sure this leads to faster healing !!

i'm sorry that i wasn't around so much these last couple of months or so, but please accept this massive off me !!

and all my !!

from

Matthew x

Wow. I have been out of touch a lot and didn't really know that you were having problems Caroline. I am, however, very pleased to hear that you are doing better. Continuous intractable pain can beat a person down no matter how strong they are. Even if it is not a major pain, just the constantness of it eats you up.

It's awesome that you're feeling better Caroline -- There's no stopping you!!

Thanks for checking in on me and for all the beautiful, funny, and always encouraging well wishes. I am actually feeling better these days then I have in a long, long while. I have been off all narcotics for two weeks, and down to Advil, and even that is tapering off to just a few a day. Since the hematoma drained off, most of the pain is gone. Only have pain inside and behind my belly button which is where there were two laproscope (sp) cameras during the 7 hours of surgery. I am doing more household chores and getting on fine, and I am trying to be careful and not lift too much.

Tomorrow we have a team of six to help Scott and I over at Mom and Dad's house (i.e. Hell House) and I sure would like to be able to lift heavy stuff and help kick ass on the mess over there. I have plans to get things out of the basement, like two television sets from the 1960's, one color and one black and white, in big heavy ornate casings. TV sets used to be important pieces of furniture in homes. My mother keeps saying we need to get rid of the tv guts and keep the cabinet. We'll see. I have other plans for getting all their books and bookcases out of the basement and down into ours. All the churchy books and the vitamin and exercise and nutrition books from the 60's, 70's and 80's are going to charity. I am keeping only the good stuff and I want the shelves more for displaying Scott's gigantic action figure collection!

In our dreams, our basement is a shrine to comic book geeks only upscale. I even want a little 'coffee house' down there, and someday (way in the future) a flat screen TV set-up.

BUt everything depends on unloading that house and paying off the nursing home. I NEVER would have believed my father would hang on and on and on almost two years after they said he'd pass on, and run up a $75,000 bill...... If he was still in his right mind it might be a blessing, but this is torture for him and for us.

Anyway, I am so happy that my operation and the pain is over and that I will never have to experience that set of circumstances ever again. It is kind of like a freeing experience in a lot of ways. I can watch a lot of commercials about 'ladies things' now and just thumb my nose at them

Caroline,

Have you thought about ebay for the TV cabinets?

Good luck in cleaning out the house.

I just found one currently on sale (in UT too!) and no bids for less than $10.00. At that price the winner would have to come and haul it out of the basement.

That really does sound like a kick-ass basement. In my head I'm even smelling the aroma of old comics and coffee right now, and I find it very pleasing!

Hey Cobie, it would be great to have you drop by for coffee and to just hang out and go through comics with Scott!

I *think* I may have found the right realtor for our needs. At 1pm today he is picking me up and we are driving over to my folks' house so I can take him on a tour and see what he thinks. Obviously we have a lot of work to do before prospective buyers can look at it, but this guy wanted to see it and get to work. On Saturday we will have a big crew of workers there, plus an industrial 30-yard dumpster. (Dumpster is $350 for one week, yikes!) Even my brother is going to make an appearance. He doesn't know it yet, but I am going to assign him the task of hauling out all the hazardous chemicals and old paint and the two ancient refrigerators.

A funny side note, our friend Mindy brought her identical twin sister to help last weekend. Her name is Windy. They also brought their sister-in-law. So we had Mindy, Windy and Cindy!!! LOL

Wow, it's been a long time since I checked in. Well Scott and I have been extremely busy and pretty stressed, but on the good side, it may be ending soon.

As I had last written, we were beginning to work really hard on clearing out, packing up, moving out, and then cleaning my parents' home so we could sell it. I did in fact hire the agent that I mentioned above.

Some of you know, but most of you do not know. My father passed away on September 6th, of complications due to Alzheimer's, blah, blah, blah. Alzheimer's is an ugly disease because your loved one lives a long time past when they even know who you are of what you have shared together. My father was lost to us almost entirely the past two years, and in some ways before that. We all knew he was going to die, and it was simply a waiting game. But, like everyone always says, when it happens it is still a shock. I deeply missed the daddy that I had when I was a little girl, and the best of my father when he was a good and strong man.

Under the circumstances, he was sick for so long that no one remembered him or seemed to care, and the fact that he had failed to plan for his future and had left my mother in extreme, dire debt, we had him quietly cremated and had no funeral or service. He is residing in a black plastic box (so why do they call it an urn?) in the bottom drawer of his gigantic roll-top desk which now sits in our livingroom. Whenever we have the opportunity to travel to Portland, Oregon, I will release dad's ashes from the center of the St. John's Bridge. He was born in St. John's, and his heart has pretty much always been there. In the throes of Alzheimer's, he always remembered his boyhood friends and teenage companions, whereas he forgot who we were and who mom was. (Their 54th wedding anniversary would have been Spetember 14th)

His nursing home care had averaged $1,000 a week, and he was expected to live six months. Dad actually survived for twenty-two months. The bills are almost too much to contemplate without getting physically ill.

After his death, we had no time to really process his loss, as the lawyers set upon us. From the day after his death, Scott and I were at their house working every hour that Scott wasn't at work himself. On weekends our friends from our Dungeons and Dragons group (The Company of the Rune'ed Mace) gathered to help us. We could not have managed to get out of the house without them. Goddess bless geeks! A pleasant and very welcome surprise was that my brother and his wife also showed up to help. Dad's death seemed to force my brother to 'pull his head out' somewhat. (He still found time last Saturday to take the day off to go pumpkin picking and decorate his yard while we were killing ourselves working!)

Long story short, the realtor said 'just let me list it and take phone calls and they can see it when you are out of there.' Well, he actually showed people in, and he listed it in the last week of September. IT SOLD IN 4 HOURS! We were almost struck dumb. We couldn't believe it. It was such a blessing and such a curse at the same time. Now it was an absolute panic rush to be out as soon as possible.

We have been totally and absolutely out of the house since Monday, and are waiting for closing. We believe we have gotten full asking price. We have our fingers crossed that the sale is progressing, as our agent is deep in the mountains of Idaho deer hunting with a buddy for a week. Must resist urge to make my Brokeback Mtn joke that I told Scott....

'If' everything goes well, my mother will have enough to pay off the existing mortgage and the nursing home bill. Please keep a good thought out for us during this next hectic waiting period. But, in spite of having that debt hanging over our heads, it was such a huge relief to be out of that mess. Honestly, there were rooms you couldn't fit a hand into for being stuffed with 'stuff.' We must have given an entire semi-truck load of goods to the charity. We donated clothing, books, furniture, tools, office supplies, cooking utensils, light fixtures and lamps. It was crazy, as most of the items still had price tags on them or had never been used once opened. In this situation, we had no time to hassel with yard sales and stuff. We had a 5-bedroom, two bathroom home with a gigantic basement and a family room and workshop that was floor to ceiling boxes of stuff.

My brother took home the original newspapers from all over Oregon, Washington and California of the day in 1933 the Hindenburg exploded. He has always been a blimp nut. Scott and I took home the papers from the day that Kennedy was shot, and the surrounding days of his funeral and national mourning period. I also gave Gregory the papers from the first time John Glen went to the moon, and the day that man landed on the moon.

We have enough World War II things to open a museum. I have toyed with the idea of transcribing all the letters, putting them into a cohesive timeline of 1943-1946 and sending it to a publishing house to see if it could be a book. Dad also apparently smuggled a professional grade camera into the war, and left pounds of photos that no one knew existed till we found them.

Scott and I now have a home that looks like a warehouse Every day I try to unpack more boxes, and it looks a little more normal then it did a week ago. It is going to take time. Our bodies are still trying to recover from the physical ordeal of weeks of moving. Some nights we'd crawl out of there at midnight and be incapable of coherent speech and just grunt at each other and moan our way in the house to drop into bed. The last couple days, I couldn't stop crying because it was sort of nuts but I was going to miss the house. Talk about love/hate relationship! Maybe it was the pull of all the ghosts in the house. My father, my brother, and all my beloved cats that we had lost their over the years.

Anyway, this is why Scott and I have not been around much. Thank you to everyone who has kept us in their thoughts and prayers and sent little notes and cards in real life. I hope no one ever has to be in this same situation unless you have as good a friends as we do here. Blessings to everyone on this board

Here's looking forward to having a more restful, at least peaceful future and the most normal holiday season that we've been able to have in years. We so need a break and a bunch of better luck Hugs everyone!!

You (and Scott) are always in our thoughts Caroline! It sounds like its been an emotional roller-coaster the last few weeks, and I'm glad to hear that things have moved along. 4 hours! That's really great!

I'll keep you both in my prayers and hope the price is what you're hoping!

And it sounds like the photos/letters might actually be something you could turn into a book. You should look into it, but only after you and Scott get a welcome breather

Caroline and Scott.
I'm worried that anything I say right now will come of as some kind of tired cliche or lame platitude but I'm sorry for your pain and I'm saddened to hear of your fathers passing but take comfort from the thought that he isn't suffering anymore.

It's also good to hear that you have finally got the problem with the house sorted and I hope you will all make enough from the sale to help ease your problems.

My mother is seriously ill at the moment and she too goes through good and bad days when she seems almost delerious and other times - sadly less often now - when you can still see her as her old self. We, like you were, are really only playing a waiting game now and so I have some idea how hard it must have been for you.

Add to that your own health problems and I would say you and Scott and your mum deserve a little - actually a LOT - of happiness in your lives. I hope that now maybe that can happen for you.

We are all rooting for you and thanks for sharing with us.

Always on your side,

John.

I am sorry to hear about your father's passing, although I also know that given his disease, it was also a relief for you.

My cousin is caring for her parents. My aunt has Alzheimers and my uncle has dementia. Her daughter-in-law is a nurse and comes in every day to care for them.

Know that you and Scott are in my thoughts.

Looks like there is light at the end of the tunnel, and it's not an oncoming train after all!

At least there weren't any House of Usher surprises in your parents' house. It's great that it sold so quickly and it's going to be a big weight off your shoulders when the deal is finally closed.

We have so many ambivalent feelings about our parents after they die. Somehow it never turns out like they planned or like you expected.

Take good care of yourselves!

How well you've held up. It's nice, you sharing your life with Legion World as you do. I hope your Ma is well also and continues so.

I agree with CK, as that generation becomes lost, those photos might take care of your Ma quite well, book or not. Be worth your time to obtain an appraisal I think.

Continued best wishes.

Caroline
Thanks for letting us know how you two are getting on; I have had you in my thoughts a lot over the last week or so.

The letters and photos might be of interest to a museum if you can bear to part with them. You can loan them if you don’t want to part with them permanently. I for one would love to see the photo’s as they must be a wonderful record of “real life” and not Hollywood images of the “glory of war”

Please take care of each other and when you have rested come back to legion world when you can.

I'm coming to this thread late, but I just wanted you to know how sorry I am to hear about your dad's passing. I'm glad things are looking up for you, but I understand how hard it can be.

for both of you.

Belated well-wishes, Scott and Caroline. Still catching up from being away in Boston.

It has truly been a trying year for you both. You have earned a breather, and I pray you get it.

A good friend of mine is an excellent astrologer. I'm going to PM you with two of his recent forecasts for you.

I haven't been around a lot either recently, but I had to stop by to extend my condolences as well. Caroline and Scott, you're both beautiful people and I hope you know there are lots of people that are sending good thoughts your way.

Caroline (and Scott, of course)--

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. It seems like if it's not one thing, it's something else... You guys deserve a break (or ten).

Please know you're in my thoughts and I hope you get that rest you deserve some time in the near future. Good luck with everything.

And don't forget to stop by again when you find more free time! We miss the first family of Legion World horribly.

Best wishes. <3

Caroline & Scott:

I've just now stumbled across this thread and discovered the latest news. I'm so sorry for your loss. Although your dad's passing was expected, the actual event is never easy.

I can hardly imagine the whirlwind that has been your life in recent months. The two of you have held up so well throughout it. Now that the house is finally empty and almost sold, I hope you can both take a deep, deep breath and relax. You both deserve it.

Hugs to both of you!

Caroline --

I just read your posts in this thread thread.

I hope that one day my daughters will have something this kind to say in my memory, "I deeply missed the daddy that I had when I was a little girl, and the best of my father when he was a good and strong man."

As a father, I can tell you that there is no higher reward than praise from a loving child.

I am sorry to hear about the loss of your father and hope that all is going well for you and Scott now.

Take care of yourselves, and know that your Legion World family always has kind thoughts and best wishes in mind for you both.

Caroline,

I have company this week so I haven't been around much.

It's good to have you back. We missed you.

I really can't think of anything to add other than more hugs.



Take care,
RhL/John