Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum Cobalt's Office of Security - Original Silver Age Thread!

Cobalt Kid and Fat Cramer, I am coming for you, this I promise.

Blockade Boy, your name has been added to the list of those to be arrested and tortured in the Inquisition. Fools! You will all bow before Stu, or be given to me to be taught the meaning of pain.

Ah, the office of Cobalt Kid.

What do we have here? Pictures of a girl named Umber? Of a man named Numf-El? Some demon? What are these, your children? Fool!

An LMBP barrette? Pathetic, this I will destroy. Ah, a picture of Space Tart, your dead wife. The one you whine and whine about. I will take pleasure in ripping this picture up in front of your eyes.

Poor little man from Grrgg. Everything was so funny until now.

Ah well. There goes my monthly de-oxidation. I guess I might not be making the wedding.

Hmm, wonder if I have some black paint around here somewhere?

Royal Inquisitor!

I have had enough! Come out now! Come and meet your doom!

<magnetically rips doors off of the Security Office>

You have taken my office, illegally, and presumed to take my position on Legion World.

Worse, you have destroyed an innocent, by using your Omega Beam on Giant Squid, a person who only wished to do his job! You have gone to far, and now you must suffer the consequences.

Quislet, Esq. has given me a warrant for your arrest, so now...it's legal. Where I was preparing to challenge you and destroy you, I now know that I can work within the confines of the law.

Come out and face me man to man, one on one, you pathetic little eunuch!

<charges in>

You bastard! How dare you go through my personnal belongings?!

Who are you and what grudge do you hold against me? How do you know where I'm from?

Come out and fight me!

And me! You want to feel pain, Inquisitor? I'll hit you with every poem I ever wrote.

I am here, you sad boy!

<hurls axe at Cobalt Kid>

Come and meet your doom! It's about time you came out of hiding! The Inquisition continues with you!

Come and meet your finale! I'll give you the present you've always wished for, I'll send you to your wife!

<attacks>

<hurls mini-axe at Fat Cramer>

I can take all of you on at once!

<magnetically grabs both axes and throws them back at the Inquisitor>

Meet my wife? You'll pay for that comment.

<attacks>

I can destroy you with my powers, or I can give you the beating you so desperately need, the choice is yours. I've fought tougher before, and you're nothing.

I'm not some innocent reporter you're picking on now buddy. You'll never forget this day now...

<hard punch, and magnetically throws him through wall into Space Ranger's office.>

<Punches Cobalt Kid, and then grabs hidden dagger and slashes him across the chest>

Is that the best you have? Look at the scars you've gathered young man...I'll be sure to add some more before I finish you once and for all.

I can see your tombstone now: failed son, failed husband, failed father and now failed hero. All you've ever been good at is being tortured!

<leaps at him>

<comes at him with a strong left jab and a harder right hook>

Who are you to know these things about me?

I'm done talking to you Inquisitor. You're under arrest, and coming with me.

<hurls him into the ceiling, up into Shark Lad's water-tank office. Flies up and hits him double fisted in the gut>

(Munches [cold] popcorn)

Inquisitor Royal
It's you who's disloyal
Your axe has gone wide of its mark.
You bloated buffoon!
Go howl at the moon!
Bemoan your sad state in the dark.

You fight valiantly Cobalt Kid and Fat Cramer!

The Inquisitor is close to finished, but let me help you in this:

With my power, I now reveal you the Inquisitor's true self, so that you may know who your enemy really was...

<uses power to reveal the true form of the Royal Inquisitor>

And now, it is time for me to learn the truth about Stu. I promise to return to you all when and if I can...

<nailed by Cobalt Kid into Shark Lad's tank>

Ugh! Y-you fool...

<hit by Fat Cramer's poetry>

N-NOO! Stop that poem, I can't take it...

<hit by the LMBP Spectre. The Royal Inquisitor's true personnage is revealed: he is Dr. Albert Hoffman, the arch-nemesis of Cobalt Kid>

I came here to bring you the pain you deserved Cobalt, and to hurt your friends as well. But Legion World is too much, too many of you...

You should all be burned at the stake, like that fool Giant Squid. Fat Cramer, you will pay for this...

The Inquisition must live on...

He said I must pay
but he went away
O frabjus day!

Not today Inquisitor. I should have known it was you Dr. Hoffman. Still haunting me after all this time. I'll never even knew how you survived, I thought you were dead for sure. Bastard.

<kicks him in the ribs>

Today, the Inquisition dies. You are hereby under arrest for homicide and attempted arson, and a whole other slew of crimes.

This is for Giant Squid and all the pain you've caused. You took advantage of Stu's state of mind and were able to weasal your way into this office. Now, you'll pay the price.

<cuffs him>

I'm taking you to Takron-Galtos, to suffer for your crimes.

Fat Cramer, my thanks, without you, I don't know if I could take him alone.

And LMBP Spectre, wherever you are, thanks.

Just one more war, Hoffman? Not this time. This time, you pay.

FC, thanks, but the resistance must continue! The Security office is ours again, but now I have to get it in order!

We need to rally together and get started on what to do about Stu!

<Vee charges in and slams the Inquisitor to the floor>

Oooops! Guess I'm a little late but I wanted to get in at least one good wallop! I told you I have your back Cobie.

Great! I'll make some tea and cookies.

Sounds good to me!

<Continues to bind the Inquisitor with manacles, and then gags him to>

Can't have him talking to his guards!

<Hands him off to other Security Officers and guards, to be sent to Takron-Galtos>

I'll leave it up to Quis now to decide what should happen. He issued you the warrant and I brought him in, and there are tons of witnesses to his crimes. He's done. One down, at least.

And it looks like Winema has moved on to greener pastures to. That leaves the big problem, what we have to do with Stu.

In the meantime, I'll have some tea and cookies!

(Who would have thought, Dr. Albert Hoffman? Waiting for an oppurtunity to slip into the drama of Legion World...)

Empress enters the Security Office with Winema Wazzo being towed by an energy beam from the Eye.

Cobie dear, where shall I put this Palid Pretender to the throne. I caught her red handed trying to steal all of the valuables in the Mansion and many of Legion World's artifacts.

That sounds like theft to me EE! Stu might be our enemy now, but his bride robbing him is good enough reason for me to bring her in.

Put her in the detention center in the basement.

In the meantime, do you think you could help me repair the Security Office? The doors have been destroyed, and the walls and ceiling of my office are in shambles. And Space Ranger and Shark Lad's offices are even worse...

I'll put these private valuables away, that the Inquisitor deared to touch...to think he almost destroyed them...

Why, of course sweetie!

Zzzzzztttttttttt!!!!!!!!!!!

There! All fixed up. Shark Lad's office is sealed up as good as new and I put in fresh water for him (When was the last time THAT got cleaned?) Space Ranger's is all better now also and the entrane door is now twice as secure as it use to be.

I sure hope you don't mind the stained glass window depicitng ME that I installed to fill that hole in the outer wall. It makes the place seem SO much classier! I love the way it turned out! It's really a wonderful depiction of me in all my glory!

Maybe I'll put one in of you on the other wall. Just to balance things out a little, you know?

Empress, thank you! And I like the picture a lot, maybe one of me would be a good idea?

At least, the old me. I've been turned into an ameoba by Stu. I know this is hardest on you and the other woman of Legion World. But don't worry, I'll change back somehow (I hope).

At least I have my wits about me, Pov doesn't even have that.

But I'm still head of Security! And the resistance lives on!

We must defeat Stu!

Ummmm...ahhhh...I'm not sure how elegant an ameoba would look in stained glass sweetie.

Yes, that would probably be better. Let me think about it, okay?


I sure hope so. His amoeba slime trail is ruining the emerald hued rug I just installed! Such a shame too, I was just getting him trained to the point where he could almost keep up with me "undercovers"!