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Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term
Part VIII: The Ongoing LMB Tag Team Thread


Real History

Tag Team threads have always been a long-standing tradition in the art of LMB storytelling, and one can argue helped launch the idea of a fictional LMB in the first place. As the years have come and gone, however, there have been periods that have seen immense tag team activity, and then period where there was virtually none. During Year Two (in continuity) there was very strong period of tag team stories, although that was never matched in subsequent years. During Year four, the long tag team threads, such as “Hot Summer Nights” and “Doom of the Super-Heroes” brought tag team threads back, although they were not as frequent.

Once on Legion World, tag team threads came back in a big way, in the Bits O’ Legionnaire Forum, which was created for things exactly of this nature. Soon, the tag team stories followed, after “Super Jailhouse of Space” was finally completed (although in a rather confusing way). The tag team stories to follow were: “The Fight Against Thora”, “The Return of Dev-Em” and “Ms. Grundy Visits SHAKES”, all of which were active at this time.

After these, Cobalt Kid launched another tag team thread “The Ongoing LMB Tag Team Thread”, with the same idea, but this time to switch it up, there would be no ending. Soon after, the thread exploded, and exploded, and then…exploded some more. The pages began piling on top of one another, and quite suddenly, the thread was up to 30 pages long!!

To back up for a second—this thread lasted for the latter two thirds of Princess Crujectra’s term and well beyond, in Stu’s term as leader. However, for the purposes of this section here and now, the parts during Princess Crujectra’s term will be covered. The latter half of the tag thread will be covered in the next section during Stu’s term.

The Ongoing LMB Tag Thread was absolutely bursting with ideas, with about six to seven amazing ones per page—and at 30 plus pages! Eventually, it would become too big that it would hinder the story-telling, but that is for the next section. For right now, we will analyze the effects it had on continuity.

This thread can be found here, The Ongoing Tag Team Thread


In Continuity

Murder Mysterious Nads-Kicker Lad, a wannabe who wished he could be like Nads-Kicker Lass and Penis Eradicator Lad appears mysterious murdered on Legion World (his severed head that is). This turns out to be the work of Madrox the Multiple Durlan, who attacks Cobalt Kid, Shark Lad and Super Lad Kid! A being known as John A. Misnomer appears, along with the Morality League of Qward, who demand Hummer Lass and Captain Lightlbulb, who is visiting the LMB. Both are revealed to be Brood agents in disguise who attack! John A. Misnomer, after getting soaked by Danny Blaine and Space Ranger’s piss becomes the hated enemy Brood-shit, while another Brood Officer, Petty Officer Marvin of the Brood , turns on his brethren and helps the LMB in the name of good. He is quickly inducted as an Honorary Member of the LMB.

Star 69 Dev-Em and Kara, on a mission in space, encounter Vaginimus, who was on a tear through the universe to capture the Emerald Dildo of Ekron. However, Dev-Em uses his knowledge of the LMB Archives to draw them both to the Golden Dildo of Taltar, which crashes head-long into the Emerald Dildo! Combined together, the two erupt into the beautiful Star 69, where it is believed the Emerald Dildo Fairy has joined them and taken on a life essence there. Vaginimus, moved by this beautiful spectacle, decides to move peacefully throughout the universe.

The Church of the Great Orgasm Vaginimus is interrupted, however, as ‘The One from M81” crash-lands into her, causing an eruption of cosmic orgasm. Various members of the cosmos feel this suddenly, and become consumed with the desire to reach that state once more. They band together and become the Church of the Great Orgasm. This same exact moment causes the Brood attack to flounder.

Sonnie Bloke’s Super-Brother Numf-El, the brother of Sonnie and old friend of Harbinger, realizes that the LMB are severely stretched thin these days. He joins his two comrades and is quickly inducted to the LMB on the merits of his humor alone.

Whoredru, Ruler of Legion World! Sonnie, Numf-El, Harbinger, Fat Cramer. Varalent, Blockade Boy and others are suddenly attacked by the combined annoying attacks of Bagpipes Boy and the 2 Lori Mornings! These attacks appear to only be a preview of a deeper attack, as Whoredru once more appears and attacks Legion World!

The Cumming of Climactus! Throughout this craziness, Antiquated Forms of Communication Lass appears and tells them of a warning, although Eryk Davis Ester is able to see through this, and recognize her as an imposter! Climactus attacks Legion World, reigning secretion on them, until the arrival of Something else else Amazing, who is able to defeat the monster through means that are really something amazing! Something else else Amazing is quickly inducted as an Honorary Member of the LMB.

Ongoing LMBP Adventures Magazine Capitalizing on the interest in LMB adventures, the “Ongoing LMBP Adventures Magazine” is launched. The staff there includes Eddie Tor , Editor; Trixie the extremely flexible Pixie /Gal Friday; Deirdre Harlow, The secretary's secretary; Dolly the Sheep; Roger Moore; Samantha Fox.

The Youngest LMBer Invisible Brainiac joins the LMB, after impressing them with his wits, intelligence, raw power and sheer enthusiasm. A certifiable genius, his power at first appears to work in that he gains his genius when he is invisible. However, this is not the true nature of his powers, which he keeps secret at first.

The LMB Green Lantern Numf-El comes face to face with Almost But Not Quite New Kid, who the LMBers had been referring to as ABNQNK for short, and laughs at the moniker. Dubbing him Abin Quank, which is actually quite close to his real name, they rejoin the battle, but only after Abin decides to take on the name Abin Quank as his heroic LMB moniker. Cobalt Kid, seeing Abin’s use of super-annoyance as a limited power, issues him a genuine Green Lantern ring that he had secured on his various security missions. Thus, Abin Quank emerges as the Green Lantern of the LMB!

An Onslaught of Enemies Things continue to move toward a climax, as a variety of LMB villains launch an attack under the orders of the main villainess. Madrox the Multiple Durlan, Turns You Into A Country Fred, Slaughter Hawk, Bloodbath and Avangelyne (the last three new villains), Fat Albert & the Gang and the Church of the Great Orgasm attack, but a united LMB (virtually every member at this time) fight back, along with Petty Officer Marvin of the Brood, Something else else Amazing and Captain Lightbulb. New members Numf-El and Invisible Brainiac, along with Abin Quank, Green Lantern, shine. Only the main villainess was left.

Tragedies Revisited The main thread behind the attacks of Madrox the Multiple Durlan, the Church of the Great Orgasm and Climactus is revealed! As the LMBers take some much needed tea and biscuits time on their ranch, LardLad is led astray by Hummer Lass, who offers him actual sex, to his surprise! As he goes for it, he learns that this is actually Mordra the Harlot, one of the greatest LMB tragedies, back again after all these years! She quickly steals the Lardforce power from him, and then precedes to the do the same to all the other male LMBers (gay and strait) through the same method of vaginal sex! Finally, they are able to rally around the female LMBers who defeat her and restore all their powers, but only after it becomes apparent that LardLad has lost his full connection to the Lardforce!

The Great Cogaaaad Saga Part I “The Consortium of Giant Ants Attempting to Achieve Dominance”, a group of giant ants doing just that, launch an attack on the world! Dusty Baker, an old honorary LMBer, unites 13 various LMBers from all over to attack them, becoming “the Baker’s Dozen”. Towards the end, Dusty Baker and Rody the Super-Rat are transported backwards into the past by the Time Mouse Trapper, who appears! Note- this bit of the tag thread can actually be seen in “ Great Cogaaad Saga ” in a ‘breaking up the LMB Tag Thread’ production

The Great Cogaaad Saga Part II The Time Mouse Trapper unleashes his attack, by transporting the Cogaaaad under a red sun, where they all gain the power of a Kryptonian! They launch their attack on the universe, as honorary LMBer P’ym H’nry, also known as Ant-Man, a giant ant who could shrink to the size of an ant, discovers a way to beat them. He beams this information directly into the brain of Outdoor Miner, who is drunk at SHAKES, although he is then killed by the murderous crew. He dies valiantly for the LMB. A united LMB attacks the Cogaaad in space, as a few others prepare for a more secret mission.

The Great Cogaaad Saga Part III With the united LMB battling the Cogaaad in space, Kid Prime joins the Light Brigade for a suicide mission into Ant Man’s laboratory to blast the red sun into a yellow one. The charge in, dubbing the mission “The Charge of the Light Brigade” and succeed. Meanwhile, a smaller team consisting of Lash Lad, Iron Rat, Poverty Lad, Cobalt Kid, Icefyre, Outdoor Miner, Homecoming Queen, Marvin of the Brood and Super Lad Kid attack the Time Mouse Trapper on his home ground at the end of time. After a vicious battle, the Time Mouse Trapper is finally revealed to be Lash Lad from an alternate universe where he actually kept the retcon powers! Suddenly the LMB Spectre arrives and uses her power to rip the mouse apart from the man, splitting the power in two. Super Lad Kid uses his smell replicating power to make the mouse search for cheese, which it does, traveling through time. The beaten Trapper, with no longer any powers, is left at the end of time finally defeated for good, after all the evil he has done to the LMB.

Mysteries and Back Stories The One Called the One reemerges for a brief period of time, interested in Eryk Davis Ester, LardLad, Pornis, Lucifer Lass and Leap Year Lass once more. Lucifer Lass kills time-traveler H.G. Wells, who intended to help the LMB look for Rody the Super Rat and Dusty Baker.

Wart World and Uranus The planet Pluto, actually a mad God of the old universe, begins to attacks Uranus along with the Robot-Cans. Only the LMB are able to stop it, as it begins to make its way to Legion World. Doctor One and Invisible Brainiac come with a device to destroy it. A previous battle with the JSMBP (which we know little about yet) caused Pluto to be trapped in the first place. During this battle, a young woman named Everyday Girl, who is haunted by two ghosts that the LMB believe don’t exist, helps against the evil enemies. Everyday Girl is inducted as an Honorary Member to the LMB!

Golden Girl The Mangler attacks the LMB, as Golden Girl, a mysterious girl with links to the LMB’s past, appears. Strangely enough, Numf-El reveals to Cobalt Kid that he is Numf’s father, as Numf-El has been sent back in time—and then, quite suddenly, he reveals that Golden Girl is his mother! After a strange but amusing interlude with Golden Girl during the Wart World Saga (which included Golden Girl inseminating herself with Cobalt Kid's semen in front of Numf-El), Numf-El and Harbinger decide to go to Scotland to learn the origins of his birth.

Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term
Part IX: The Election of Stu and He Who Wanders


Real History

Princess Crujectra and Eryk Davis Ester’s terms came to an end at a time were the activity among the LMB was at an all time high. The sheer number of things going on was amazingly immense, and Legion World’s Mission Monitor Board almost could not contain it.

Thus, when the next election came, facilitated by Crujectra, the activity was particularly immense. Once more, one of the largest turnouts ever for an election was made and people enjoyed the entire process, getting involved in every way they can. A more in depth nomination period preceded the actual elections and then a large campaigning period, in the tradition of the first elections, followed suit. Various threads endorsing the candidates arose, including the return of the LMB Enquirer, which once more printed various lies and false but very funny, stories about them.

At the end of the election, Stu was elected leader of the LMB for the third time, and He Who Wanders and Princess Crujectra were elected as the deputy leaders. Princess Crujectra opted to forego another term, and He Who Wanders became the sole deputy.

The Final Nominees were:

Kid Prime
Varalent
Princess Crujectra
He Who Wanders
Stu

In Continuity

The LMB elections once more came into play as Princess Crujectra and Eryk Davis Ester’s terms came to an end. Princess Crujectra oversaw the nomination period, which was more in depth this time around, as more LMBers became actively involved in the elections. Once more, the LMB Enquirer, which had followed the LMB to Legion World, continued to produce scandalous lies and half-truths about the LMBers running for office (and occasionally, some that were not).

For a period of time, it looked like the front-running candidate for LMB leader may have been Fat Cramer, or it at least appeared that way through her campaign manager, Lash Lad. However, a brief name change return to Dark Cramer and what looked to be a possible team-up with Mekt Ranzz, a villainous Legion Worlder with a flare for etiquette, made many question this. This was all rendered moot when Dark Cramer dropped out of the race in the final days before the last round of nominees were picked. She then returned to the moniker Fat Cramer.

At the end of the elections, Iron Rat and He Who Wanders were elected leader and deputy leader, after Princess Crujectra declined her election to deputy leader.

Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term
Part X: The LMB at the End of Princess Crujectra’s Term


Here is the active LMB roster at roughly the exact time that Princess Crujectra’s term as leader came to an end:

Princess Crujectra (Leader)
Eryk Davis Ester (Deputy Leader)
Lash Lad
LardLad
Cobalt Kid
Mystery Lad
Grey Birdboy
Rhino
Sketch Lad
Dev-Em
Looks that Kill Lad
Lucien Lad
Shark Lad
Faraway Lad
Furball
Iron Rat (aka Stu)
The Boy with Ultra Powers
Poverty Lad
Umber (& the Boyz)
Leap Year Lass (aka Thriftshop Debutante)
Kid Prime
Quislet, Esq.
Varalent
Fat Cramer
Nightcrawler
Matlock
Minesurfer
He Who Wanders
Lightning Lad
Saturn Girl
Sanity or Madness?
Outdoor Miner
Arachne
Sonnie
Rickshaw
DrakeB3001
Tromium Crystal
White Raven
Star Boy
Awkward Pause Boy
Bubble Wrap Boy
Portfolio Boy
Danny Blaine
Blockade Boy
Super Lad Kid
Semi-Transparent Fellow
Icefyre
Abin Quank (aka Almost New Kid, New Kid)
Harbinger
Space Ranger
Emerald Empress
Mantis
Kara
Numf-El
Invisible Brainiac
Doctor One (aka Juan)

LMB Reservists**
Crusader
Maxx
LMB Spectre
Kid Gender Reversal Stereotype II
Something else else Amazing
Marvin of the Brood
Everyday Girl


**By the end of Princess Crujectra's term, the LMB Reserves had officially been reinstated, and were filled by both traditional reservists and other, newer allies.

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part I: High Energy and Growth


In the final weeks of 2003, Stu and He Who Wanders began their terms as LMB leaders, as the high energy and traffic on Legion World continued to be non-stop. Throughout this term, the revitalized community of Legion World, now undoubtedly one solid community, continued to immerse themselves in a variety of fun and madness on their new home. New Friendships continued to be forged and old ones became even stronger.

There was a continued effort on the part of many to search out old friends and get them to journey to Legion World. Old LMBers and members of the DCMBs slowly but surely registered and other newer members joined up for the first time, quickly becoming part of the constantly evolving community.

It must be said outright that there has never benn, and most likely will never be, a time when the membership becomes more firm than it is flowing. With that in mind, it can be said that by the time Stu became leader of the LMB once more, this trend had somewhat begun in a minor degree, so that the long-time players on Legion World became somewhat established, and Legion World itself, although still new and fresh, had begun many of its own traditions and customs.

The continually fun and craziness raged on throughout the next three months and the LMB, in terms of continuity and storylines, blazed forward with a plethora of ideas, never stopping once for anyone to catch its breath. This finally culminated in the final weeks of Stu’s term in what is called “The Dark Stu Saga”, a period that is looked with great nostalgia by many. Incredibly unique, the Dark Stu Saga encompassed a wide range of people, stories and silliness on the Mission Monitor Board, and set the stage for what future role-playing storylines would be like. It was a highly energized fun ride that created an even higher level of energy on the MMB, when it appeared that things might actually be slowing down.

In a way, Stu’s term can be seen as the final part of the pre-adolescent days of an early Legion World, in that by the end of it, a very firm grasp of what Legion World meant to everyone was held by most. Further, by the end of Stu’s term the website had been up and running for three quarters of a year and it was clear that it was not going to be going anywhere any time soon. People who had traditionally not been a part of the same circles were interacting on more continual basis and doing so on a variety of topics.

What had begun in the months before became more concrete during Stu’s term, as people really became embroiled in the fun that could be had.

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part II: Life on Legion World


Activity on forums has increased and decreased, events have happened and natural thread ideas and topics have peaked at certain points and become more prominent at others. Like Princess Crujectra’s term before it, Stu’s term as leader saw the beginning of many of its own trends throughout the various forums on Legion World, many of which continue to this day. Here are a variety of things that were occurring during this period of LMB history:


The Mission Monitor Board
Establishments Throughout Stu’s term, another trend became prominent on the Mission Monitor Board, that of the creation of a variety of establishments on Legion World. Where previously some threads were more centered on being someone’s ‘room’, these threads were often types of establishments that served food or performed some service to its customers, and were used that way in the day to day role-playing aspect of LMB life and continuity on the Mission Monitor Board. Joining SHAKES, Café Cramer , choclatte , the former Danny B’s Starfield Lounge restructured as the Beacon and others furthered this trend. Although some threads previously existed, such as Kid Prime’s Room, Vee’s Variable Villa and Cobalt’s Security Office, this was a period in which these types of threads really exploded, and it was very common to see half of page one of the MMB occupied with them. These threads soon became very large and exist to this day. each thread will be covered individually in the Anecdotes section

The Dark Stu Saga The Culmination in Stu’s Term arrived in the form of “The Dark Stu Saga”, which will receive further attention later in this narrative in its own section. What is remarkable about this trend in relation to this chapter is the all-encompassing aspect of this event, in both terms of people and in threads. For at least five or six weeks, which was an enormous amount of time, this storyline progressed across the MMB, filtering in and out of a variety of older threads, as well as a plethora of newer ones. A large amount of different posters became embroiled in it, including many new ones, many who never involved themselves in such a thing, and many who had not posted a lot in recent months and were now reemerging. This ‘saga’ was so prevalent, that it showed a tremendous amount of activity each and every single day, as opposed to later similar events/sagas that would often be marked by minor periods of activity in their duration. The Dark Stu Saga also showed the uses of the board in full effect, as avatars, names, signatures and other things were used to highlight the changes occurring in relation to it.


Legion Forum
Legionology Begun by Superboymddjr, these threads became a weekly event for a period during Stu’s term as leader, as they focused on an individual or team's characteristic traits and how it possess such uniqueness to the Legion Lore. There were a variety of them during this period that included many Legion Worlders weighing in there opinions.

The Trophy Room
From the onset, the Trophy Room had seen little activity, as well as caused some minor computer hack problems for Legion World. During a period where Nightcrawler wished to restructure the board, he decided to discontinue the forum and add the small amount of threads there to other forums accordingly.

Visionaries of Tomorrow
As Nightcrawler continued to consolidate and restructure the various forums on Legion World, he created the Visionaries of Tomorrow forum. Previously, there had been a few different forums for various creators, such as Dave Cockrum and Steve Lightle, in which they were the moderators. However, with an abundance of Legion creators venturing over to Legion World to interact with us, it became too complicated to give each creator their own forum, therefore prompting Nightcrawler to create the Visionaries forum to house all of the creators.

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part III: The Ongoing LMB Tag Team Thread


Real History: The Ongoing Tag Team Thread began during Princess Crujectra’s term as leader, and it became a staple in the Bits of Legionnaire Business Forum, and the main source of all things LMB in regards to tag threads and Onevisions. After Princess Crujectra’s term came to an end, the Ongoing Tag Team thread continued well into Stu’s term.

From there, the thread continued on with a variety of stories and ideas, lasting well through Stu’s term, before finally beginning to fizzle out towards the end of it. It lasted well into thirty pages with a plethora of ideas, events and characterizations occurring. In the subsequent months, many attempts to resurrect the thread have been tried, although it’s never quite caught as much activity again.

Towards the end of its lifespan, the Ongoing Tag Team thread took on a different type of style, as it became more of the product of mainly four main writers, Numf-El, Invisible Brainiac, Abin Quank (and his various alt IDs) and Cobalt Kid, although others pitched in from time to time. It was because of its massive size (over twenty pages) that people began finding it too overwhelming to join in. Further, the stories became more and more separate and were similar to a series of Onevisions occurring at roughly the same time. Despite all this, many of the most brilliant bits occur during this period.

This thread can be found here, The Ongoing Tag Team Thread


In Continuity

The JSMBP Rody the Super Rat and Dusty Baker, sent back in time to the 1950’s, find themselves face to face with the Justice Society of Message Board Posters (the JSMBP), whose roster includes: Super Duper Marvelous Man, Spectacular Aqua Lungs Lass, the Green Latrine, and Jesse Quickly. Rody and Dusty also confirm that Jesse Quickly is indeed the mother of the time-lost twins and enemies of the LMBP, the Quicklys (who battled them in “Ms. Grundy Visits SHAKES”). Further, JSMBP allies Duck Bloggers and his sidekick Cloned Green Pig join them. Immediately, a misunderstanding occurs and Dusty and Rody find themselves at odds with the JSMBP! Note- this brilliant work of Abin Quank is truly more of a Onevision than an aspect of the tag team thread


Road Trip to Aberdeen: the Origin of Numf-El In light of recent events, Numf-El, accompanied by Harbinger, journeys to Aberdeen, Scotland, and a variety of other places to uncover his origins. After a series of crazy antics, including some with Roger Moore, Samantha Fox, Trixie of the LMBP Adventures Magazine and Dolly the Sheep, Trixie invites these allies to join her as the news team of LMBP Adventures Magazine. After further adventures with Captain James T. Kirk and Darth Vader, he eventually learns the truth: he is the product of a clone Supergirl created by Darkseid who went mad after 14,000 years (Golden Girl) and a large series of heroic and great figures. They include about 6,000 different fathers that exist throughout space/time/multiverse outside of such things as continuity, such as Atilla the Hun, Jesse James, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Alexander the Great, and according to Darkseid, the greatest of hero them all, Cobalt Kid, whom Darkseid tells him has yet to fulfill his potential. After learning his origins, Numf is shocked to learn that Harbinger would prefer to stay with Darkseid, rather than return, and Numf-El returns alone to the LMBP. Note- this brilliant work of Numf-El is truly more of a Onevision than an aspect of the tag team thread

Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat After the misunderstanding is worked out, the JSMBP and Rody and Dusty consult their Ouija board and discover the madness of Pluto aka Wartworld! However, they are soon interrupted by the entrance of Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat, further visitors from the 31st century, to the others surprise. Immediately, Stoopid Cat wants to attack Rody, but is stopped by Green Cloned Pig. Further, Dusty Baker learns that Pagan Lass is actually the wife of LMBer Abin Quank, and Stoopid Cat is the long lost brother of Fat Cramer! this is actually a Onevision written by Abin Quank

Mean Old Hero Tired of seeing these wipper-snappers goof off so much, old time do-gooder Mean Old Hero ventured to Legion World for a day, and suddenly made every LMBers genitalia fall off! Soon though, this was revealed to be a trick by Mean Old Hero, who was really an illusionist, as a way to teach them the lesson of humility.

The Great Intellect Some dangerous intellect begins summoning all parts of the Emerald Body of Ekron toward it to gather a dangerous force, as a plethora of LMBers are drawn into the mix. Soon, every member of the LMB is involved, including long lost honorary member Santa Claus. We also learn a few interesting facts about Santa Claus, including his real name is Nick Fountaine, former secret agent for the British Empire during the French Revolution, he is a gay man, he is a magic-user on par with the Sorcerer Supreme, is a practitioner of pagan witchcraft who actually secretly celebrates the birthday of Mithras, the Persian deity, which is on the same day, he is immortal and ages very slowly., Ms. Claus is actually Santa's adopted daughter, is a HOTTIE!, Santa is fat for a reason, because in his civilization, being overweight makes you sexy! Whenever Santa beefs up for the holidays, he knows that when he gets back home he's going to look like a bonafide sex-pot!, Nick believes in the legalization of marijuana and is known for smoking a few doobies here and there, and Santa is wanted in parts of the galaxy for murdering the War-Monger king of the dreaded Evil Empire.

The Rainbow Man of Ekron Dancing Queen returns with her new pal Booty Shaker, both bent on helping the Great Intellect, as they force Semi, Varalent, the Emerald Empress and Shark Lad to undergo synchronized swimming! Meanwhile, Marvin of the Brood and Santa Claus discover the true horror of the Great Intellect: he is brining back the body parts of Ekron to give himself immense power in the form of: the Rainbow Man of Ekron! In addition, swarms of Loony Tunes characters swept across the universe, and shockingly left Petty Officer Marvin of the Brood in a new state: as Marvin the Martian (of the Brood)!

The Origin of Stoopid Cat After a clash between Stoopid Cat and Rody the Super Rat, we learn that Stoopid Cat received his power from a clash with StuRat sometime in his past—which resulted in a lasting enmity between the two of them. Further, we learn that StuRat has taken a long list of forms (7412 in fact) during his time as a sorcerer, beginning way back as StuGerbil in Ancient Egypt under the tutelage Numb-Nuts the Semi-Incomprehensible. Further, we learn that Bast, the Pre-Egyptian Goddess of Cats empowered Stoopid Cat to act as a balance to his cosmic twin, StuRat, to one day stop a terrible invasion of the galaxy. Bast then used her subtle manipulations of the universe to ensure that Pagan Lass (born centuries later) and Stoopid Cat found one another, as Pagan Lass was the third prophesized savior in this struggle. this is actually a Onevision written by Abin Quank

Galactic War and Rainbows As the Rainbow Man of Ekron summoned his power to him, his agents Slaughterhawk, Avenglyne and Bloodbath joined Elmer Fudd, who betrays his new friends the LMB and takes on the name Death Blood, forming the “Badly named 1990’s Villains”! The LMB suddenly rush to battle them in space unknowingly leaving Legion World unguarded, as the Rainbow Man of Ekron attacks! Suddenly, every single LMBer, reservist, honorary member and inactive member are called into action for the big finale!

Pre-Egypt and the JSMBP The mystery of the connections between some LMBers and Pre-Egypt deepens, as StuRat senses Stoopid Cat and Pagan Lass’ absence in the current timeline (and the untrue notion that the Rainbow Man of Ekron may have been his dreaded enemy) lead him to travel back in time! Joining him was Nightcrawler! this is actually mostly a Onevision written by Abin Quank

Letting off Steam in SHAKES following the non-stop stream of recent events, the LMB converged on SHAKES, where an unexpected ‘show’ took place, as Harbinger poured flaming cherry brande down her toes into Cobalt Kid’s mouth, to the delight of Space Ranger and Abin Quank! Things began to get wildly out of control from there, as Poverty Lad pronounced his love for Jinx and others began acting crazy. Unfortunately, all woke up the next day with no memory of this night, and are unsure if it was a dream…

Showdown in JSMBP HQ! StuRat and Nightcrawler arrive, joining Rody the Super Rat and Dusty Baker, and suddenly, the battle with the JSMBP erupts! The JSMBP are joined by another of their member, Mr. Terrifically and his T-spheres Ben and Wa! And then, in the midst of the madness, the battle between Stoopid Cat and StuRat begins! This rages on, until finally…Bast appears! Bast then tells Stoopid Cat, StuRat and Pagan Lass about the oncoming threat, and with her magic, sends Dusty to Shameless Hussies with his friends, Rody the Super Rat to join Numf-El on his upcoming journey, and the JSMBP back to their home in the 1950’s, leaving the three mystical members and Nightcrawler. this is actually mostly a Onevision written by Abin Quank

Shameless Hussies the infamous other hangout of the LMB on Legion World gets spotlighted, as Numf-El, Cobalt Kid, Abin Quank and Invisible Brainiac meet two suspicious trailer park hussies, Trailer Trash Barbie and Party Time Skipper. Pagan Lass, who enjoys some time on stage, then convinces Numf-El and Abin Quank to do their own 'dance' on stage, as Dusty Baker suddenly appears! this is actually mostly a Onevision written by Pagan Lass

Zombies, Kung-Fu and the girl named Kaant Numf-El decides to swear off the seven deadly sins and learn kung-fu and spirituality in the Andes Mountains (really so he can learn to kick some ass). Embarking on this journey, he is joined by Kaant, an Asian girl with a dirty mouth and a hard-ass personality, and 247 Panamanian Zombies that follow Numf wherever he goes, Rody the Super Rat, Homecoming Queen and other assorted crazy people!. this is actually a Onevision written by Numf-El

Here are some other anecdotes to note following these stories:
- Everyday Girl, Dusty Baker, Bugs Bunny, Santa Claus and Something else else Amazing returned to their homes, maintaining their honorary membership.
- Invisible Brainiac battled his enemy Truant Officer Ralph for a time.
- Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat returned to the 31st Century and became official memberes of the LMBP!
- Harbinger gave Cobalt Kid a massive wallop of a punch after he got fresh once too often!
- Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl and Nightcrawler officially notify the LMB that they now plan on leaving Legion World and going on space-missions (where they previously felt confined because of their duties as founders).
- Harbinger and Fat Cramer discuss all things LMB over some tea!
- Salad Tosser Lord breaks Cobalt Kid up into Cobalt Id, Cobalt Ego and Cobalt Super-Ego, until LardLad and Eryk Davis Ester free him!

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part IV: The All New, Not-so-Different, LMBP Tag Team Thread


Real History

Toward the middle of Stu’s term as leader, the Ongoing LMBP Tag Team thread began to die out, as mainly four authors continued to post on it. In an attempt to bring more people back into the craziness and fun of tag team posting, a new Tag Team thread was started, entitled ‘The All New, Not so Different, LMBP Tag Team Thread’. This thread lasted for a few weeks during Stu’s term, and became another very large thread that incorporated a wide array of storylines and subplots, as well as brought in a wide range of posters. Typical of LMBP tag team threads, however, it began to die out at one point, and never had an official ending.


In Continuity

It was a sunny day at the Hootchie Hut when Houston, a girl working there, awoke from a dream with a scream—although at the same time Prince Lordain was having a dream of Houston having that dream—and even more, at the same time, a Giant Cactus picking his nose was having a dream of Prince Lordain having a dream about Houston having the same dream—and at the same time again, EDE was having a dream about the Giant Cactus picking his nose having a dream about Prince Lordain having a dream about Houston having the same dream!

He gets out of bed after being weary of such a weird dream and ventures to Café Cramer, where he encounters LMB antagonist Nads-Kicker Lass. She tells him Penis Eradicator Lad, her kissing cousin, has been kidnapped by Pornis! This was strange because theoretically Penis-Eradicator Lad could destroy Pornis with one blast of his powers, considering Pornis was a giant penis. However, before EDE could ask more questions, Nads-Kicker Lass begins hitting on him (which is of course dangerous for any male), but Lash and Poverty Lad interrupt to tell him Vaginimus is attacking Legion World with an army of tiny house spiders.

While Nightcrawler, Emerald Empress and LardLad fight back Vaginimus and the spiders, they learn that they are actually coming to seek refuge from, oddly enough, the armies of Legion World!

On Legion World, Cobalt Kid entered the Café looking for Eryk to find Nads-Kicker Lass flirting with him even more. Realizing that the only other Triumvir that could be using a Legion World army was Greybird, he rushed over to the Aviary to find Grey Birdboy unconscious! Joined by Stoopid Cat and Jinx, they attempted to rouse him.

At the Café, Fat Cramer had Nads-Kicker Lass teach her a few moves when Creepy Jerk Kid entered the Café and began hitting on Nads-Kicker, taking her away from EDE, who had tried to call Lightning Lad for female advice. Creepy Jerk Kid got dirty with Nads-Kicker, and while everyone waiting for the big pay-off, she shocked them by giving him a passionate kiss!

At the Hootchie Hut, a bi-beer spiked Varalent noticed the pole-dancer named Houston and found himself oddly attracted to her. Unknown to them, the giant Cactus had traveled to Prince Lordain and the two were en route to join them right then.

In orbit around Legion World, as Nightcrawler attempted to figure out what to do with the spiders and Vaginimus, the Emerald Empress made a shocking announcement to LardLad that she was pregnant.

Meanwhile on Venus, a young boy looked at the sky and saw a large rift opening. He had a note that told the whereabouts of Kid Prime that might or might not be with a toked out Lori Morning. Lori, however, apparently had used the H-Dial to become…Nads Kicker Lass?!

Further, another enemy saw an opportune time to let loose his ‘Puppy Dogs of War!’

On Legion World, Beagle Boy races to the Aviary and saves Cobalt Kid, Jinx, Stoopid Cat and Grey Birdboy from a sudden attack by a mystery assailant in a truck. Cobalt Kid uses his magnetism to rip out the assailant…

At the Hootchie Hut, Varalent is taken into the champagne room, where Invisible Brainiac, secretly at the Hut, pays Houston to give him the works. This is interrupted as Semi bursts into the Hut and demands she cut the shenanigans and tell them about the dream. Before she can, however, the Hootchie Hut is attacked by Giant Robotic Lesbian and Anti-Lad, looking for Cobalt Kid to kick his ass for lacing GRL’s drink with Bi-beer earlier that week! A frenzy breaks out, just as Prince Lordain and the giant Cactus arrive…

Meanwhile at the Café, Fat Cramer sees how distressed Eryk is because of Creepy Jerk Kid making time with Nads Kicker Lass, and so she delivers her own brutal kick to his nads! As he falls out of the story, a furious Nads Kicker is calmed down by EDE, who tells her he’ll help her find her cousin…

EDE, Nads Kicker and FC immediately grab Outdoor Miner and teleport to the Hootchie Hut, thinking Lardy might be there, although they are suddenly immersed in the huge fight going on there! After a melee, Eryk and Miner teleport back to Legion World, leaving everyone else at the Hootchie Hut, just in time to see Cobalt Kid rip out Ambiguous Kid, however, they were soon interrupted by the Titty Twins, Lactation Lass and Tits McGill! Outdoor Miner then teleports the Titty Twins and EDE *back* to the Hootchie Hut into the middle of the madness! There, however, GRL and Anti-Lad had decided Cobalt Kid was not there and stormed off.

In this story, LardLad reveals the origins of the Titty Twins, and their relation to HUGEMANBREASTS, Globe Girl and Space Tart, which was previously added into this narrative.


At this exact time, Emerald Empress reveals the father of her child—who is actually a mother! You see, it was a gender-reversed Nads Kicker Lass!

Elsewhere at the Hootchie Hut, Invisible Brainiac was in combat with his enemy, the cutie known as Spelling Bee! At first the LMBers planned to stop her lusty intentions towards the young LMBer, but stopped when they realized she only wanted to neck. In the other room, Fat Cramer lectured the Cactus and Prince Lordain about how the Hootchie Hut was not a strip-joint but a place of worship for the sacred dance.

Meanwhile, reality stars Night & Day were fighting, much to the amusement of the LMBers on monitor duty, Homecoming Queen and Kid Psychout.

In orbit, Nightcrawler had figured out that it was Victoria’s Secret World that had pretended to be the Legion World armies to capture Vagnimus, to use the spiders that lived with her to make excellent silk, which would further their economy which was based on the negligee industry. Suddenly, Poverty Lad revealed himself to actually be the impersonator Madrox the Multiple Durlan, who was working for both Pornis and the Victoria’s Secret Empire. Their plan was for Madrox to capture Vaginimus for Pornis and the spiders for the negligee empire! Madrox then began, to well, multiple, only using a chalkboard and his Durlan hands as sharp figure nails, stunning the LMB!

Meanwhile, the real Pov was in a Censory Deprivation Tank, censoring Pov’s use of obscenities! Cobalt Kid, Beagz, Stoopid Cat and Grey Birdboy went to rescue him, after Cobalt got the location from Ambiguous Boy by beating him repeatedly with a telephone book and rubber hose while Stoopid Cat watched to make sure no LMBers saw! As they freed Pov, Pornis revealed himself and attacked the cave, with Penis-Eradicator Lad helping him while under mind-control! However, before they had to resort to using a neutered Stoopid Cat to defend them, Poverty Lad awoke from his dream, which in turn caused the whole lab to explode from the climax of his dream! Pornis and Penis-Eradicator Lad escaped, while Pov was brought to a hospital. They are then joined by Umber and Amber, who strangely were giggling with lipstick on each other’s collars, after some various curious activities. Faraway Lad joined them and sent them to the Hootchie Hut, which of course was inaccurate, as his powers are to send people far away, not to a direct place. About a mile from the Hootchie Hut, they begin trekking there.

However, Faraway Lad and Stoopid Cat reappear, where they are suddenly attacked by the villain who had unleashed the puppies of war—their old enemy Behind You Boy!

With everyone else converging on the Hootchie Hut, an albino midget crashed into the fray, only to be trampled by the Puppy Dogs of War, as simultaneously a meteorite hit the asteroid holding up the Hootchie Hut! As chaos continued, a Super Moby Dick appeared with Captain Ahab of the Eight Dimension, whom the Cactus recognized, as his race had trade relations with the Eight Dimension! Following him was the Communist Super Red Army of Space! Chaos ensued!

The Puppy Dogs of War began to eat the Red Army, which gave them indigestion, while the albino midget fled! And suddenly…the great rift that the young kid saw had stretched across the universe to the Hootchie Hut. The Prince, the Cactus and Houston all explain that they saw this in the dream, where they and Eryk Davis Ester could save the universe, except…

The Emerald Empress suddenly went into premature labor! Suddenly joining them, Winema Wazzo pulls her out of battle, but even worse—she then kidnaps EDE!

Back on Legion World, Pornis has blasted all of the remaining LMBers: Sanity or Madness?, Abin Quank, Poverty Lad, etc., as well as Penis-Eradicator, explaining that he made a deal with the enemy to kidnap and kill Penis-Eradicator Lad so Nads Kicker would then become a man and have an affair with the Emerald Empress, so her baby could then be used to complete the spell that began with the great rift, which would then make everyone in the universe sterile—and thus, end life as we know it! He leaves them all for dead and exits…

…However! Kid Prime, still kidnapped, is revealed to be the prisoner of the One Called the One! The One hates Kippers because of his instrumental role in her defeat in ‘Hot Summer Nights’, but she also hates Pornis more! She sends Lucifer Lass to rescue Penis-Eradicator Lad, which leads her to Legion World, where Lucifer Lass saves the LMB, Legion World and Penis-Eradicator Lad, but destroying Pornis’ evil liquid! She then makes them pledge to allow her to return to Legion World without them hindering her, if she should so choose. They agree, and she takes a select handful of LMBers with Penis-Eradicator Lad to the One Called the One’s Lair.

Meanwhile, the Empress, in labor, is stuck with Winema Wazzo and Eryk, when suddenly Winema, unknowingly duped for her role in this, is knocked out and Behind You Boy stands revealed! The poor Empress, in labor, can do little, as both Eryk Davis Ester and the baby are kidnapped by Behind You Boy! However, this is the mighty Emerald Empress, Sarya of Veneger, and even during labor she will not be trifled with. She uses the Eye to blast Behind You Boy’s ship, although the villain is able to escape with the baby. She does, however, save EDE, and brings him back. Behind You Boy escapes, with the help of Madrox the Multiple Durlan, and the two rush forth to complete their spell.

At the Hootchie Hut, the remaining LMB settle all scores and send all villains packing, as they now search frantically for the Empress and Eryk. They finally find them, although they are unsure what to do. It is then that Lucifer Lass arrives with Penis-Eradicator Lad, the other LMBers and Kid Prime, who the One decided to free in return for a secret promise she had Kid Prime make concerning Lard Lad and Eryk Davis Ester. United, a small team is sent to find the baby, while the others use the Prince, the Cactus, Houston and Eryk, who then soon discover can be substituted by Lucifer Lass and Lard Lad to figure out a way to stop the rift. It is Dr. One and Abin Quank (with his ring), who finally figure out how to reverse the effects.

This only works however, because a small team of Arachne, Varalent, Cobalt Kid and Invisible Brainiac, with Nads Kicker Lass and Penis Eradicator, travel to the secret destination of the enemy: as Faraway Lad uses his power to send a note to the LMB far away, although just close enough to hit Poverty Lad on the noggin, which causes Outdoor Miner to hone in on Far and send the LMB to them (with the Emerald Empress helping). There, the LMBers defeat the Madrox the Multiple Durlan, but are too late—the child is entered into the spell, and grows into a horrible figure of pure energy and lust! No longer a child, it enters the spell…however, the four dreamers are able to hinder its progress back at the Hootchie Hut. Its only when Nads Kicker Lass delivers a horrible kick to her own child, which is now some type of reborn sexual evil deity, that it stops. Not to be outdone, Penis Eradicator Lad turns to Behind You Boy, who masterminded the whole thing…and Eradicates his Penis!

The enemy I stopped and the Sex Deity is sent hurling into the rift, where it is imprisoned. Nads-Kicker Lass and Penis-Eradicator Lad, who up until now had been LMB antagonists, now decide they’d rather be LMB allies. Further, the mystery of the connection between the One Called the One/Pornis/Eryk Davis Ester/LardLad/Lucifer Lass deepens.

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part V: Anecdotes and Adventures During StuRat’s Term


While the majority of tag team adventures took place during the opening weeks of Iron Rat’s term, and the Dark Stu Saga took place during the closing weeks, there was still a plethora of adventures and anecdotes during the intervening period.

Inauguration Iron Rat’s term kicked off with the Inaugural Ball, to celebrate the new leaders of the LMB. This took place at the newly constructed “ Stu\'s Mansion ”, which would act as his head quarters, during his time as leader, continuing the tradition of Princess Crujectra, who used her own headquarters during her term. A wide range of LMBers turned up for the night, and it became a very large celebrity event. Giant Squid, a big time media reporter, and almost a celebrity himself now, covered the event in detail.

Stu’s Cabinet Upon his taking office, StuRat carefully fills his cabinet with a variety of able LMBers to assist himself and He Who Wanders throughout their term. Kid Prime, Varalent, and Icefyre all receive high ranking positions, as does Jinx, which is a bold move, considering that felines have traditionally not been a part of government institutions. The Security Office under Cobalt Kid continues its long-standing mutual cooperation with the new government, as Iron Rat recommends (which Cobalt Kid agrees to) that Arachne and Blockade Boy be appointed as Security Officers.

- Quislet, Esq., the well-known Legion World lawyer was appointed as Chief Magistrate by Iron Rat, and acted as the final say on all things litigious.

Café Cramer The growth of the capital city of Legion World continues, as more LMBPers are encouraged to begin opening different types of businesses on Legion World. Like SHAKES before it, Café Cramer is opened to appeal to the ordinary folk of Legion World by offering daily treats, foods and beverages. Fat Cramer, the entrepreneur of this restaurant is quickly recognized as a premier businesswoman and Café Cramer soars in popularity. Soon after, a variety of other restaurants open.

Commerce in Restaurants With SHAKES and Café Cramer proving that a business in foods and drinks is both highly profitable and sorely needed on Legion World, other Legion Worlders begin to open their own restaurants, usually each one finding their own niche, and thereby adding a tremendous amount of diversity. These restaurants begin to take up the open space on Main Street, which intersects with Embassy Row and (the later known) Statue Way, creating what may refer to as “The Food District”. Semi-Transparent Fellow and Fat Cramer, the two entrepreneurs of Legion World’s most popular restaurants, took it upon themselves to revitalize “Danny B’s Starfield Lounge”, renaming it The Beacon , and making it the premier restaurant on Legion World, noted for its class and style. With Danny Blaine, Saturn Girl and help from other LMBers such as Stu and Cobalt Kid, the Beacon quickly opens to raving reviews. Stu and Cobalt Kid, both respectively busy as LMB Leader and Chief of Security, find time for their own venture, opening up choclatte a small café that centers around chocolates and chocolate themed drinks, such as the infamous ‘chocolatte’, which was created by Cobalt Kid by accident. Lash Lad also got into the act, created the much loved “ Lash\'s Weenie Hut ”, which catered to the Legion Worlders more primal desires. As months would go by, other restaurants would continue to open and this venue of business continued to expand, as these buildings joined the likes of other business district notables, such as Kid Prime’s Room, Stu’s Mansion, Cobalt’s Security Office and Vee’s Varitable Villa.

- At this point, most of the adventures that take place in “The Ongoing Tag Team Thread” occur, as more weeks move by during StuRat and He Who Wander’s term. By the end of those adventures, Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat have joined the LMBP.

Curious and Curiouser The long-standing mystery of the connection between LardLad and Eryk Davis Ester is further complicated as Eryk Davis Ester wakes up one morning to find himself stuck in LardLad’s body. Despite many LMBers attempting to figure out what has caused this, they are unable to determine the origins of the problem, which is rendered moot a week later when Eryk Davis Ester returns back to normal.

Old Friends Never Leave Forever T hroughout the creation and migration to Legion World, the LMB maintained a steady program of getting their old friends to join them, despite being scattered throughout the universe. Often, this would cause long-missing friends to turn up, find their home, and then retire from public life and active membership of the LMB again, knowing that the LMBers were satisfied that their friend’s safety was secure. This program exploded early in Stu’s term, as old friends Caleb and Ger returned to the fold briefly, enjoying a warm reception (and the latter being missing for sometime). Kid Therod also returned, as did Galahadran (aka Lurker Lad II), both missing from the LMB for some time as well. Eventually, all four would fit the pattern and retire from public life, but their home on Legion World had been established.

- The Feline community becomes more active on Legion World, as Fat Cramer, Stoopid Cat and Jinx, all three prominent LMBers and Legion Worlders, spend a great deal of effort to combat institutional racism against felines.

- Raging Bull, although an inactive LMBer, spends a few days on Legion World, and enjoys many nice nights at the Beacon in the company of Danny Blaine. Many other LMBers speculate that this could the foundation of a romantic relationship.

- LMBers Mantis and Kara, both alt IDs that had become prominent under Princess Crujectra’s term, decide to retire from public life on Legion World and leave the active roster of the LMB. Mantis takes an opportunity to remind the LMB to be on guard, because the great evil she has been warning them about will still one day arrive. She spends time with Cobalt Kid and Space Ranger to discuss what she can do to help warn them.

The Price of Security A mystery on Legion World begins to unravel, as a small boy named Elagabolus is discovered as a recent refugee on Legion World, and is mysteriously attacked by magical creatures. Soon, every LMBer on Legion World is drawn into the fray, as Cobalt Kid and Iron Rat desperately attempt to learn of his origins, and what any LMBers may know that could help them. LMB Cadet Esk further complicates things, as her visions of the future show a horrible future for the LMB 5 years after they disband, and she dreams that the cause of their disbanding is the boy Elagabolus himself. Iron Rat is able to learn through confrontations with an evil creature named Jocelyn Moonstar and an immensely powerful entity known as the Devourer of Children, that Elagabolus is a magical center point in the galaxy, something that only occurs every thousand years or so. A dark wizard Septimus, who fears the world so much he would see it destroyed, as become aware of Elagabolus’ presence and hopes to use the boy create the destruction of the world. Legion World then undergoes a series of attacks by Septimus’ agents, including a vampire named Severus who is destroyed by Lash Lad, and a creature called ‘The Forsaken Bard’, who terrifyingly kills over twenty innocents before he is destroyed and his bones are sealed away. The new girlfriend of Invisible Brainiac, a girl named Sarah from Café Cramer, finds herself in danger, and her sister Anne, who is on a date with Cobalt Kid, is almost killed. In an attempt to save Elagabolus, Cobalt Kid is almost killed, until Elagabolus uses his power to heal to save him—and in doing so, transfers this power to Cobalt Kid, leaving himself with only his opposite powers of destruction, thus fulfilling Esk’s prophecy that he has the power of destruction. Fearing for future safety of Legion World, the LMB Founders, Legion World Founders and current leaders gather for a special conference to decide his fate, where Cobalt Kid and Iron Rat offer to take the boy far away from Legion World and discover his origins and the origins of Septimus, and possibly defeat the mage. A small band is then decided to undertake this task, including Lash Lad, LardLad, Arachne, and Grey Birdboy, although they are unknowingly joined by Invisible Brainiac, who feels he too should be on the quest. The LMBers leave in secret with Elagabolus on this journey. note- this is a Onevision written by Cobalt Kid

- Beagle Boy returns to active duty in the LMB, and rejoins them on Legion World, to the delight of old and new LMBer alike.

- Stu, in a final act before leaving on his quest, creates “Stu’s Repository of Lost Artifacts ”, which houses a variety of important and powerful items the LMB have collected over the years. Sealed with a variety of enchantments and security cautions, it also contains the recently collected bones of the ‘Forsaken Bard’.

New Faces The constant influx of new LMBers on Legion World continues, as the LMB are pleased to see so many competent applicants to the LMB in light of many of their most powerful leaving. In the most impressive showing of new strength since the LMB’s first month, new members join the fold: Captain Dallas, Monkey-Eater Lad, Bedlam Lad, Kent Shakespeare, and Bicycle Repair Man. Sanity or Madness? also recommends his old friend and trusted ally, Actor Lad, who is also quickly inducted. The new members test their mettle quickly, having to battle Nads-Kicker Lass, Penis-Eradicator Lad, and Tharcock.

Dragons With seven of the most powerful LMBers away from Legion World, a new mission develops that falls into the hands of Numf-El, Sonnie Bloke, Marvin the Martian of the Brood, new member Captain Dallas, and Harbinger. What starts as a simple mission soon develops into a plot of intrigue, horror and absolute hilarity that spans for over a year! Kaant, Rody the Super-Rat, and Stacy Sheridan all weave their way into the madness. note- this is a Onevision written by Numf-El .

Journeys and Destinies The secret mission to take Elagabolus from Legion World begins, as Cobalt Kid, Iron Rat, LardLad, Grey Birdboy, Arachne and Lash Lad begin their mission. They soon learn that Invisible Brainiac had tagged along on the mission, feeling he belonged there. A series of adventures ensue, including a confrontation with the Elves of the Green, getting stuck between two armies engaged in the 3-Way War and having to battle Princess Tarina, the light-based powered leader and chief general of one of the armies, as well as other adventures. Finally, the LMBers find an ancient library that reveals the true nature of Elagabolus and the history of Septimus, forcing a final confrontation with the dark wizard, as he tortures and dissects the deep emotions of each LMBer. In the final battle, it is Elagabolus who destroys Septimus with his destructive power, thus cementing Septimus’ victory in getting Elagabolus to use his powers for evil and destructive purposes, in hopes that he will one day destroy the world. The LMBers attempt to find Elagabolus as the dust clears, but are unable to locate the boy, feeling that the guilt of his actions will overwhelm him. Considering this mission a failure, the LMBers return to Legion World, although Cobalt Kid secretly informs LardLad that during the confusion, he was able to use Septimus’ power to travel back in time to the point that Space Tart was dying, and rescue her from the entropy that consumed her. Space Tart’s memory is blank, but Cobalt knows she is alive, and he leaves her in the care of a monastery, hoping one day she will return. Knowing he cheated death in saving her, he begins to understand that in terms of a cosmic balance, he may have indirectly help cause Elagabolus to move towards his more destructive nature. this is a Onevision written by Cobalt Kid

The Festive Five Two new LMBers join the active roster on Legion World, Magnetic Kid and Condo, who both receive an endorsement from Varalent. Soon, the young LMBers are joined by Cobalt Kid, Invisible Brainiac and Super Lad Kid, three other young LMBers that enjoy partying, and the five of them begin throwing humungous bashes at Vee’s Varitable Villa, specifically during times that Varalent, Fat Cramer, Faraway Lad and others are trying to relax. Varalent dubs them “The Festive Five”.

- At this point, the events in “The All-New, not so Different LMB Tag Thread” take place.

Trying times for Alt IDs With the resignation of Mantis and Kara in the LMB, and the prominence on Legion World of alt IDs such as Thora, Dr. Mayavale and The Royal Inquisitor, many worried about how Alt IDs were seen by the public at large. Many Alt IDs continued to look towards Space Ranger as a genuine central figure in Alt ID culture and in the future of Alt IDs on Legion World. Many Alt IDs also continued to feel as if they were considered a second class of citizens. Many prominent LMBers, including Eryk Davis Ester and Cobalt Kid, worked hard to make sure these feelings were acknowledged and solutions could be solved. By the end of Stu’s term as LMB Leader, Space Ranger truly stood as a leader among this newer generation of Alt IDs.

Interview with a Puppy In light of the recent attempt to go evil by Piddlin’ Pup, many LMBers felt it necessary to follow up strongly on this issue and see if the lovable puppy could be restored to his good self. Lucien Lad, Shark Lad, Faraway Lad and, of course, Beagle Boy journeyed to the Psychiatric Ward for Dangerous and Evil Pets, and attempted to enter the mind of the tortured puppy.

- Security Officers Emerald Empress, Super Lad Kid, Shark Lad, Invisible Brainiac, Arachne and Blockade Boy continue to investigate the whereabouts of the Royal Inquisitor and Brainiac4, as well as the true intentions of Dr. Mayavale and Thora of Taltar. Cobalt Kid and Space Ranger continue to oversee all things involving their office.

- Leap Year Lass continues to explore the mystical art of Anagrams, and makes a startling discovery, as she understands that ‘Durla’ is an anagram of ‘U Lard’. This questions the very nature of LardLad, which has been an ongoing issue among the LMB, as it leads one to believe that a possible Durlan-like nature of Lardy, meaning that he is more a force than just one specific entity, could answer some long-standing questions concerning Lardy and his connections to Eryk Davis Ester, Pornis and Lucifer Lass.

- Kent Shakespeare impresses many of the LMBers with his wit and his quick rise to the role of prominent LMBer. He joins Deputy Leader He Who Wanders, Kid Prime and Princess Crujectra on a peace tour of the universe, to promote unity in light of the Barbarian Invasions and Terran Secession in recent history.

- The armies of the Triumvirate continue to crush the Barbarian armies throughout the galaxy, to restore borders to what they once were, and explore areas of space previously untouched. The steady flow of profit this creates leads to the Triumvirs continuing to beautify Legion World, such as through EDE\'s Super Playground of Space . Further, Sketch Lad continues to use his unique abilities to ensure that the growing capital city does not lose site of its beauty. All construction of Legion World is overseen by Nightcrawler and Lightning Lad, as well as Saturn Girl, whose sharp mind is able to act as a final say on things.

- Princess Crujectra begins using the codename Spellbinder during LMB missions.

- Portfolio Boy continues to monitor and tabulate involvement on Legion World, in order to understand patterns of activity in new theoretical ways. He also begins to flirt with the idea of taking on other aliases.

Mutiny of the LMBers While on a space-mission, the LMBers find themselves at odds with mission leader Poverty Lad, who appears to be losing his mind. After he tries to abandon them at a planet with giant venus flytraps and evil gay unicorns, they must use their various powers to escape, find a space-ship and then find the truth about what has happened to Poverty Lad. Lightning Lad, Sanity or Madness?, Actor Lad, Ultra-Matt, Saturn Girl, Doctor One, Monkey-Eater Lad, Minesurfer and Icefyre are finally able to accomplish this, as they learn that Poverty Lad is actually succumbing to space-fatigue.

Different sides of Different Coins In an odd set of circumstances, Matlock and Umber are the only two LMBers left guarding Repository of Lose Artifacts, after the LMB has been warned that at midnight a space-thief will strike to steal it. The old school hero Matlock and the young LMBer Umber are able to overcome their differences in crime-fighting tactics to work together, in uncovering who their enemy is: Dip-Thong, the space-thief who holds a grudge against Eryk Davis Ester.

- Stu takes the form of a monkey for a brief period of time. His continuing experiments with form-changing lead him to further acknowledge the fact that spells can be castfaster and easier when in the form of an animal or beast.

- Cobalt Kid undertakes a secret security mission to save missing LMBer Dev-Em, whose former time in the spy world have led him into a variety of risky, but secret situations. After returning to the fold and asked what brought him back, he coins the phrase “ I Blame Cobie ”.

- Warning the LMB to respect and care for his fragile psyche, Lash Lad is surprised to see support groups for Lash\'s Fragile Psyche spring up. Leap Year Lass, however, continues to chastise him, specifically for his unusual fear of buying stamps.

- Krypto the Superdog journeys to Legion World and spends a brief period among its inhabitants.

- Bedlam Lad and Awkward Pause Boy decrease their status on the active roster at this point, although they appear sporadically from this point forward.

Exit Shark Lad Comfortable that he could deal with the high pressure lifestyle of the LMB, while not succumbing to his savage nature, Shark Lad contemplates what it would be like to develop a life outside of the LMB and outside of being evil. He focuses more on his passion for psychology and announces to the LMB that he is going to decrease his status from an active LMBer to a reservist.

note- At this point, the events of the Dark Stu Saga begin to take place, and all further anecdotes will be covered in that section.

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part VI: The Dark Stu Saga


Real History
At the end of Stu’s term as leader, Legion World and the LMB experienced its first absolute mega event in the form of the “Dark Stu Saga”. It cannot be stressed just how large and all-encompassing this event was throughout the six to seven weeks that it lasted. The basic story, which will be revealed in the ‘In Continuity’ part of this section, revolved around the current LMB leader, Stu (aka Iron Rat) becoming more and more tyrannical, until Legion World itself became under martial law and the LMB became resistance fighters against their former leader.

Throughout these weeks, a growing number of posters became actively involved in the saga. Both longtime posters with the LMB and Legion World, as well as newer posters became embroiled in the every day activities. Most remarkable however, was the number of posters who had previously not been a part of such role-playing type drama that decided to join in on the fun.

In addition to this, many other things marked the Dark Stu Saga as something that was very different than everything that had gone before. It was not a tag-team type story, but yet it held an impressive continuity that made it a very coherent and easy storyline to follow. Further, the overall story was seen in a variety of threads, which included many new ones, as well as the longer more traditional ones that had become a part of the Mission Monitor Board (i.e. Kid Prime’s Room, Vee’s Varitable Villa, Cobalt’s Security Office, etc.).

The Dark Stu Saga came at a time when Legion World was growing and changing again. The board had reached a point where, although it was still new in relative terms, that newness began to fade and a semblance of status quo began to take hold. The Dark Stu Saga effectively disrupted that sense of status quo and once again showed how energetic and vitalized things still were (not a revitalization of the board, but more of a ‘taking it up another notch’). The growing friendships and camaraderie felt throughout the board, as well as the openness to new members, grew in leaps and bounds by this event.

The Saga had become so prevalent that there was a tremendous amount of activity every single day. There were a variety of subplots and side stories, each one connecting to the main story and interweaving through each other.

This Saga also showed how the various functions of the board itself could be used to further along stories, as avatars were changed, names altered, signatures and graemlins used to express the current mood and atmosphere, etc. It was truly a board-wide event and one that is remembered fondly by those who were a part of it.


In Continuity


Week One
Shortly after being elected leader, Stu begins constructing a mansion to govern Legion World. While this was never un-ordinary, it was used against him as propaganda when it appeared that he was a tyrant.

Stu announces that he will not step down at the end of his term and will reign as leader for 70 years.

Stu begins referring to himself as the "Much-Beloved Stu". Later, he begins calling himself "His Imperial Majesty Stu".

Suddenly, Stu is one day made moderator of every forum on Legion World. Suddenly, his government is able to touch every aspect of Legion World life.

During this week, it appears that Legion World is exceptionally quiet. Many members had not been seen for days or even weeks, including: Icefyre, Harbinger, Shark Lad, Space Ranger, Abin Quank, Lash, Teeds, Super Lad Kid, and a whole slew of others. Recently, Arachne and Invisible Brainiac had not been around either. Thus, the only Security Officer around for any period of time was the chief, Cobalt Kid.

Upon learning of Stu's new status as moderator in every forum, Fat Cramer begins trying to figure out what is happening. She enlists her brother, Stoopid Cat. She then makes a secret complaint to the Office of Security.

Cobalt Kid receives the message and offer to protect both her and Stoopid Cat, fearing that a new surge of institutional racism against cats might take affect now that Stu has gripped Legion World tightly.

Almost immediately, the Royal Inquisitor comes out of hiding and offers his services to Stu.

Fat Cramer investigates deeper into Legion World, attempting to learn of all of the missing LWers. She and Cobalt Kid continue to conspire, trying to learn the truth.

Stu acts as if nothing is happening, unaware that he has scared Legion World into a terror. He assumes that all is normal, and doesn't yet realize that his friends are acting different.

Giant Squid, a reporter on Legion World, begins standing outside of Stu's mansion, demanding an interview with the tyrant. He promises that he will not move.

Kid Prime resigns from Stu's administration, admitting that he is not comfortable with the new direction Stu has taken.

Things begin to feel more dangerous on Legion World. Nightcrawler is not seen for days...


Week Two
The Royal Inquisitor begins making announcements that he supports Stu's takeover of Legion World and then offers to work for him in his government.

Fat Cramer and Cobalt Kid continue to investigate, and try to rally other Legion Worlders.

Fat Cramer beings worrying about the safety of Jinx, the feline in the Stu administration.

Quilet, Esq., the main source of law on Legion World attempts to maintain a lawful society, and warns all parties to stand down.

Giant Squid continues reporting outside of Stu's mansion, although Stu never talks to him.

STUbot #128 becomes the newest entity to arrive on Legion World. This alarms many Legion Worlders. To make things worse, the Robot begins demanding that all LWers submit to the will of Stu.

Cobalt Kid moves out of Stu's mansion, and many Legion Worlders refuse to enter it, including Spellbinder and Fat Cramer.

Kid Prime begins making rounds around Legion World, searching for an item. He sneaks into Stu's mansion while the STUbot is engaged in a confrontation and finds the item he is looking for.

The STUbots inform the Royal Inquisitor that he has a job working for Stu's government, as the new Chief of Security. Cobalt Kid warns the Inquisitor that this is not legal, since he is Security Chief for life and cannot be removed by the Legion World leader. Quislet, Esq. tries to sort out the legal matters.

While making rounds on Legion World, Cobalt Kid bumps into Kid Prime and they enjoy a drink at SHAKES. While drinking, Kid Prime is suddenly snatched out of the bar through a portal and dragged off to parts unknown .

The Royal Inquisitor begins threatening Giant Squid, who continues to report outside Stu's mansion. Quislet, Esq. warns him against touching the reporter.

STUbot #128 begins making demands on Legion World for Stu. Semi-Transparent Fellow tells him that he is not allowed in SHAKES. The STUbot then informs Legion World that prohibition is now in affect and that selling alcohol in illegal. Quislet responds by telling the robot that alcohol isn't actually sold at SHAKES, and that since drinks are for free, SHAKES can remain open.

Lightning Lad and Outdoor Miner begin searching for Kid Prime. They come across the STUbot, get engaged in a confrontation, and Lightning Lad destroys STUbot #128 .

Quickly, STUbot #129 enters Legion World. It soon becomes apparent that there is a massive amount of STUbots in waiting.

Sanity or Madness? begins questioning the actions of Stu and his robots. He unleashes Circuit Breaker, a robot destroying beast, on them. It does its job, and destroys many STUbots. However, it is also captured and joins Kid Prime.

Sanity or Madness?, Outdoor Miner and Lightning Lad continue searching for Kid Prime, and SoM? is able to rescue Circuit Breaker. However, forces work against Kid Prime and keep him in his lonely corner of hell.

Eryk Davis Ester, worried about the now full-fledged tyranny of Stu, contacts Cobalt Kid and proposes that they resurrect the Triumvirate. Cobalt agrees and contacts his fellow Triumvir, Greybird. The three Triumvirs then decided to begin mobilizing their armies and call on them to be ready to come to Legion World if necessary and fight the forces of Stu.

Fat Cramer, Cobalt Kid and others begin taking up residence at Spellbinder's Psyonian Embassy to make sure they are protected.

The Royal Inquisitor continues to threaten Giant Squid, as well as many other citizens of Legion World, specifically the Emerald Empress, Cobalt Kid, Varalent and Quislet, Esq.

Varalent resigns as Stu's Chief of Staff, disgusted by the tyranny he sees. He makes a public speech denouncing Stu .

Varalent ventures into Stu's mansion and rescues Jinx in a special mission. He takes the feline back to his Villa to make sure she’s alright.

Stu announces that he needs a Queen to rule as dictator. Winema Wazzo, ever the opportunist, begins seducing Stu and offers to join him. The two apparently begin to fall for one another, and Stu takes Winema as his consort. Many LMBers and citizens of Legion World are disgusted, and Winema's unpopularity only brings more people to begin questioning Stu.

The STUbots announce that Legion World is under Martial Law .

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part VI: The Dark Stu Saga (continued)


In continuity


Week Three
Giant Squid continues his reporting outside Stu's mansion, under threats against his life by the Royal Inquisitor and threats of being arrested by the STUbots. Quislet, Esq., continues to ensure that he is not arrested.

The Royal Inquisitor announces that he will be storming the Security Office to take away Cobalt Kid's job. Cobalt Kid refuses to let him, and prepares to fight him. There are no other security officers on Legion World now and have not been for some time.

Winema Wazzo and Stu begin making plans to rule as King and Queen. They leak to the press that they have a major announcement to make.

Varalent stands by his public decision and renounces Stu's reign as leader. He journeys to SHAKES for a drink, where he is confronted by a mass of STUbots. He begins shrinking them and smashing them .

Across Legion World, Sanity or Madness? and Circuit Breaker do the same.

Cobalt Kid leaves his Security Office and joins Varalent, helping him destroy the STUbots. They are soon joined by the Emerald Empress, who reappears on Legion World.

Elsewhere, Fat Cramer, Lightning Lad, and Outdoor Miner continue resisting Stu and his STUbots.

The Resistance is now full on. The various resisters begin organizing, at Cafe Cramer and the Beacon. However, these places are not completely safe and the resisters look for an alternate place.

While Cobalt Kid joins Varalent and Emerald Empress in destroying STUbots, the Royal Inquisitor forces his way into the Security Office and declares himself the new Security Chief. The STUbots explain that Stu, the tyrant, has nominated him. Legion World continues to be under martial law, and now a brutal backlash begins. While the resistance fights back with force, Quislet, Esq. turns to the confines of the law to use a legal means to stop this repression.

Bevis opens his new Fabulous Boutique . Secretly, it acts a center for the resistance, in a special back room designed with resistance weapons and tools. The various resistance members meet there in secret: Fat Cramer, Bevis, Stoopid Cat, Cobalt Kid, Outdoor Miner, Varalent, Emerald Empress, Lightning Lad, Eryk Davis Ester, Greybird and others.

Minesurfer begins politically riding the fence by supporting both sides.

The armies of the Triumvirate continue to mobilize. Cobalt Kid's general, Scipio Taltarus, reports back to him that Stu has amassed thousands of STUbots outside of the Legion World atmosphere. Cobalt tells them to engage in war. Greybird and Eryk Davis Ester send their armies to join them, and a great war begins taking place outside of Legion World throughout space and faraway lands.

Stu and Winema Wazzo make their big announcement. During the announcement, Winema exposes the private areas of STU of Stu to millions, in a disgusting display of debauchery. A stunned public is outraged, and even more so when Stu and Winema blame the episode on faulty equipment. Although it is obvious that Winema wishes to gain power on Legion World, Stu cannot understand why his best friends and allies are turning against him. To him, it appears as if Legion World has gone crazy and risen up in a violent rage.

Working out of Bevis' Boutique, the resistance continues working against tyranny. Bevis hurls tomatoes at Winema and Stu, Varalent and Cobalt Kid destroy more robots, Sanity or Madness? and Outdoor Miner search for Kid Prime and Fat Cramer burns the kitchens at the Beacon so Stu cannot poison the food, when it became apparent that he might (although this was a brilliant illusionary tactic by Fat Cramer that did not actually destroy the kitchens).

Giant Squid makes a speech to the public denouncing tyranny and the reign of Stu. He refuses to move away from Stu's mansion, despite offers from Fat Cramer and Varalent to broadcast from Varalent's Villa.

The Royal Inquisitor attacks Giant Squid and uses an omega beam on him, instantly destroying the innocent reporter, so that he is not only destroyed, but never existed.

Outraged, Quislet, Esq., immediately hands a warrant over to Cobalt Kid to take in the Inquisitor. Also outraged, Cobalt Kid prepares to fight back for the Security Office.

Blockade Boy, the first Security Officer to show up in weeks besides Cobalt Kid and Emerald Empress, shows up at SHAKES to see the Royal Inquisitor hurl a firebomb at it, in an attempt to destroy the institution that refused to shut down. Blockade Boy uses his abilities to saves SHAKES from being destroyed.

Cobalt Kid arrives at the Security Office and demands a final showdown with the Royal Inquisitor. He rips open the doors and runs in for the finale. Fat Cramer soon joins him, making sure that he doesn't go alone in the big battle.

The LMBP Spectre appears again on Legion World after a lengthy absence, her spirit calling out for vengeance over the destruction of Giant Squid. She vows to get to the bottom of things.

Cobalt Kid and Fat Cramer take on the Royal Inquisitor in a huge battle (here is first post) that decides the fate of the Security Office. After a lengthy and destructive battle, Cobalt Kid and Fat Cramer defeat and apprehend the Royal Inquisitor. Since Quislet issued a warrant for his arrest, Cobalt is able to legally bring him in and make sure he pays for the murder of Giant Squid.

The LMBP Spectre vows to get to the bottom of things concerning the apparent betrayal of the mystical Iron Rat.

While Cobalt Kid and the Emerald Empress repair the Security Office, Winema Wazzo makes a surprise announcement and has her marriage with Stu annulled. Ever the opportunist, she understands that things are coming to a head and attempts to escape with a large portion of Stu's money and diamonds. The Emerald Empress was able to stop her from stealing anything, although Winema was set free on bail, and prolonged her trial through various legal means, which is still pending to this day. She has never been punished for her role in the Dark Stu saga.

Bevis accidentally blows up the Security Office, unaware that it was won back.

Arachne and Invisible Brainiac reappear on the scene and immediately rejoin the resistance.

Poverty Lad and Cobalt Kid are called into Stu\'s office to talk about a peaceful solution. Poverty Lad is then turned into a duck, and Cobalt Kid into an amoeba.

Poverty Duck runs off, and Lightning Lad rescues Cobalt Amoeba and brings him back to the Resistance HQ at Bevis' Boutique.

Doctor One returns and joins the resistance. Using his knowledge, he increases Cobalt Amoeba's size so it can defend itself. Giant Cobalt Amoeba rejoins the resistance.


Week Four
With the Royal Inquisitor and Winema Wazzo no longer in the picture, the Resistance turns to Stu and begins planning what to do about his reign of terror.

In addition to destroying various STUbots, other resistance members begin using propaganda against the leader, and graphitti begins appearing on the walls of Legion World. Invisible Brainiac even goes as far as to turn Stu's mansion pink.

At this time, the very large Resistance consists of: Fat Cramer, Giant Cobalt Amoeba, Poverty Duck, Doctor One, Varalent, Emerald Empress, Stoopid Cat, Arachne, Invisible Brainiac, Blockade Boy, Eryk Davis Ester, Saturn Girl, Jinx, Greybird, Outdoor Miner, Lightning Lad, Mike Netzer, Sanity or Madness, Spellbinder, Circuit Breaker, Semi-Transparent Fellow and others, and new addition Abin Quank who returns to Legion World. Bevis is also possibly a secret member of the Resistance, although the history is a little vague on this detail.

Further, Kid Prime is still missing in his lonely corner of hell. The LMBP Spectre continues to hunt for the truth about the darkness on Legion World. Quislet, Esq. continues to maintain a state of law on Legion World, being the only voice of reason. Minesurfer continues to ride the fence.

Stu now begins to grow very worried. He cannot understand why the rest of the LMB and LWers are in revolt against him, and why they are unleashing a propaganda campaign against him. Using his magic, he learns that he too has been under a spell, and can no longer tell what was real with Winema Wazzo and what was an illusion. However, it is apparent to him that the rest of Legion World is under a massive illusion that has made him out to be a ruthless tyrant. Further, the Royal Inquisitor and the STUbots made the situation worse by furthering their own ends while Legion World was under an illusion.

Hoping for peace, Stu calls out to the LMBP Spectre, saying that " its time to end this ", and that Legion World is under a massive spell. Believing this is a trick, the rest of Legion World approaches their leader cautiously. Suddenly, the LMBP Spectre appears to the rest of Legion World, announcing that Stu is indeed right. Removing the illusion, the LMBP Spectre tells them that a higher power has been behind all of this, attempting to divide Legion World from their leader to cause the chaos that ensued. However, she is unable to learn the identity of the evil mastermind, and promises to continue searching. Suddenly, the LMBP Spectre disappears again.

Realizing that they've all been tricked, the Legion World resistance reunites with Stu under peaceful terms, and he embraces them just the same.

Now no longer a resistance, but a united LMBP, the heroes turn their attention on fixing the chaos on Legion World and restoring things to normal. Then, they promise to begin searching for the still missing Kid Prime, who had gained an important item that has been forgotten about. Further, the LMBP vows to learn the identity of the evil mastermind and stop him/her.

A mysteriously cloaked figure begins appearing on Legion World, who acknowledges him/herself to be the evil mastermind.

Spellbinder removes the magic spell on Poverty Duck, restoring him back to his normal self. However, she cannot break the spell on Giant Cobalt Amoeba.

Abin Quank restores the Security Office to it's former stature, although he makes it a bit more tasteful than before by fixing certain statues that were engaged in [exploitive deleted]. Abin tries to make a machine to turn Giant Cobalt Amoeba back to a human, but it turns out to be a pretzel making machine, now in Cobalt's office for future use.

Invisible Brainiac turns Stu's mansion back to normal and the rest of Legion World begins cleaning things up again.

Minesurfer announces that he was both sides all along, so he was truly right all along.

After several failed attempts, Fat Cramer rallies Legion World to turn Cobalt Kid back to his normal self, and begins calling all mages . Finally, it is Varalent who shrinks Giant Cobalt Amoeba down to Cobalt Amoeba, and then Sanity or Madness? who creates a machine to turn Cobalt Amoeba back into Cobalt Kid. It works perfectly, and Varalent re-grows Cobalt Kid back to his normal size.

With Stu reunited with this allies and friends, Cobalt Kid and Poverty Lad restored, and Legion World fixed and working again, the LMBP now turn their sights to the two main problems: discovering the true identity of their enemy and rescuing the missing Kid Prime.

LardLad journeys back to Legion World to rejoin his LMB comrades, as they learn that he too had been put under a spell that did not allow him to find Legion World when he searched for it.

Despite constant planning, the Mysterious Cloaked Figure's plans go awry, as Legion World is now in a full state of recovery. With Poverty Lad and Cobalt Kid alright, and Stu the accepted and beloved leader he once was, it is evident that the plans of the Mysterious Cloaked Figure have failed. Further, other Legion Worlders, such as Monkey-Eater Lad, Ammericommando (aka Probability Pete), Beagle Boy, Faraway Lad and others are now appearing regularly to thwart his plans. It now appears that Legion World is stronger than ever.

The Mysterious Cloaked Figure is unmasked by Stu, and revealed to be Phineas B. Fuddle!! The man whose message board was overrun with LMBP shenanigans in their third year had returned, plotting revenge against them during this whole time! His main targets: Poverty Lad, Stu, Cobalt Kid and LardLad were all the main people who desecrated his message board that are still around, with the exception of Lash Lad (who Phineas admitted to having a slight crush on).

Disappearing, Phineas B. Fuddle leaves Legion World, announcing that he will return. By this time, his plans are moot, the LMBP is united and Legion World stands prepared. The Royal Inquisitor caught, LardLad returned, Winema Wazzo being prosecuted and everything restored to its natural state, the LMB enjoys their reunited strength with their leader and longtime friend. Legion World is victorious.


Epilogue
However, Kid Prime remains missing, as his allies and friends search throughout the cosmos for him. Now that the battle is over and the enemy discovered, it has become apparent that Kid Prime is no longer in the clutches of Phineas B. Fuddle, but somewhere else. Could he be in a distant world or a...pocket universe? In his honor, the second great statue of Legion World is erected, \'The Statue of our lost Kid Prime\' , as the visage of Kid Prime now stands proud along across from Cobalt Kid’s. The street is renamed Statue Way.

After such a tumultuous few weeks, the LMB give themselves a slight rest and prepare to move on to the next leadership elections, as many LMBers consider taking a much deserved rest.

Giant Squid, the great casualty of the Dark Stu Saga, is honored by the LMB, for showing admirable courage in the face of adversity. The Alt ID community mourns for one of its own.

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part VII: The Election of Varalent, Quislet, Esq. and Stoopid Cat


Real History At the close of the Dark Stu Saga, the new leadership elections began, as Stu set up an intricate nomination and election process. Once again, an enormous amount of the Legion World population came out and voted, and the campaigning was as silly and hectic as ever. Similar to the last election, this time marked a period of immense activity on the Mission Monitor Board.

At the close of the elections, there were six candidates, and the poll closed with a five way tie for LMB leader: Icefyre, Varalent, Poverty Lad, Quislet, Esq. and Cobalt Kid. At the time, there was some concern that the results may have been tampered with, and many people became slightly disenchanted with the elections thereafter. In the spirit of keeping things simple and fun, the five leaders privately came up with their own plan, and Poverty Lad, Icefyre and Cobalt Kid recused themselves, so that the elected leaders were Varalent and Quislet, Esq., with Stoopid Cat as the Deputy Leader.

The nominees for the final round were:

Icefyre
Poverty Lad
Varalent
Stoopid Cat
Quislet, Esq.
Cobalt Kid

In Continuity
After the close of the Dark Stu Saga, Iron Rat felt it was time to end his term and possibly give himself a much needed rest. Using an intricate system of elections that he created, he began the new election process, and some immense campaigning ensued. Quick examples include Quislet, Esq’s back porch campaign, Stoopid Cat’s litter box, and Cobalt’s promise that everyone gets oral and children not prophesized to be great warriors would be fed to the lions.

At the close of the election, there was some concern that there was bid rigging and a tampering of the results, but the LMB was able to see that this was not the case. A five-way tie ensued, as the following were elected leader: Icefyre, Poverty Lad, Varalent, Quislet, Esq., and Cobalt Kid. Afraid of the bureaucratic nightmare that could result, Icefyre, Cobalt Kid and Poverty Lad agreed to step down, making Varalent and Quislet, Esq. the co-leaders of the LMB. Stoopid Cat was named deputy leader, becoming one of the few Alt IDs to ever be elected to that position.

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part VIII: The LMB at the End of Stu’s Term


Here is the active LMB roster at roughly exact time that Stu’s term as leader came to an end:

Iron Rat (aka StuRat, Stu) (Leader)
He Who Wanders (Deputy Leader)
Lash Lad
LardLad
Cobalt Kid
Mystery Lad
Spellbinder (aka Princess Crujectra)
Grey Birdboy
Rhino
Beagle Boy
Sketch Lad
Dev-Em
Lucien Lad
Faraway Lad
The Boy with Ultra Powers
Poverty Lad
Umber (& the Boyz)
Leap Year Lass (aka Thriftshop Debutante)
Kid Prime
Eryk Davis Ester
Quislet, Esq.
Varalent
Fat Cramer
Nightcrawler
Matlock
Minesurfer
Lightning Lad
Saturn Girl
Sanity or Madness? (now known as Reboot)
Outdoor Miner
Arachne
Sonnie
Rickshaw
DrakeB3001
Tromium Crystal
White Raven
Star Boy
Bubble Wrap Boy
Portfolio Boy
Danny Blaine
Blockade Boy
Super Lad Kid
Semi-Transparent Fellow
Icefyre
Abin Quank
Harbinger
Space Ranger
Emerald Empress
Numf-El
Invisible Brainiac
Doctor One (aka Juan)
Monkey-Eater Lad
Captain Dallas
Kent Shakespeare
Actor Lad
Bicycle Repair Man
Stoopid Cat
Pagan Lass
Magnetic Kid
Condo

LMB Reservists
Crusader
Maxx
LMB Spectre
Kid Gender Reversal Stereotype II
Something else else Amazing
Marvin of the Brood
Everyday Girl
Santa Claus

Year Five: StuRat’s Term
Part IX: Paul


From the very beginning of the LMB, one member that had been present throughout its history was Looks that Kill Lad, otherwise known as Paul MacNeil. Paul had been a part of LMB craziness and during that time became close friends with many, as well as a friendly acquaintance with others over the years. He was a true part of the interconnected group of friends that is the LMBP. Intelligent, fun and light-hearted, Paul made everyone smile with a few words.

During the early weeks of 2004, Paul passed away. Feeling saddened by his passing, it was a genuine tribute to how real his friendship was with many of us who lived so far away, especially those who had gotten to know him better than most.

He’ll be missed, and we’ll always look back fondly at our interactions with our Looks that Kill Lad. Knowing his love for the ‘Lord of the Rings’ series, we can only smile and hope he’s enjoying the Grey Havens

Looks that Kill Lad (1972 – 2004)
Rest in Peace

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part I: Change, Growth, & Patterns


As the new leadership took charge of the LMB, life moved on as it always had, as things changed, people and institutions grew on Legion World, and different patterns emerged and changed. At the onset of the new leadership, some of the prominent posters that had been at Legion World since its beginning decreased their activity, as other posters began to increase theirs. New posters, such as Kent Shakespeare, and later KinetixZoeGreen became more prominent, while a large portion of previous posters from a variety of eras continued to post regularly on Legion World. Legion World was changing, albeit very subtly.

Despite being relatively new, Legion World had become a strong foundation for the community it housed, and the LMB felt comfortable posting in both the Mission Monitor Board (the general home of LMB-centered craziness) and the other boards: the Legion forum, Dr. Gym’lls, the Anywhere Machine, etc. In fact, while the Legion forum and the MMB had previously had an immense amount of activity since Legion World opened, it was at the onset of this new term that the other forums began to come close to matching them in activity upon occasion. Bits of Legionnaire Business continued to have a plethora of threads that encouraged community projects, although shifted away from tag team stories and more towards the new monthly galleries begun by Monkey Eater Lad, and threads such as “ Missing a Muse ” by Leap Year Lass.

New ‘events/stories’ took place in the form of things like the ‘Alt ID Rebellion’, although the pendulum shifted back during this term to less story-type threads and more personal threads, comic-book driven threads, and other things. The activity level, however, remained potent and strong.

During this period, the LMB celebrated their real-life fourth anniversary, a strong tribute to the strong friendships and mutual enjoyment of one another that had begun so long ago. While change and patterns seemed more subtle and undetectable, the feeling of growth continued to be strong.

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part II: Life on Legion World


The Mission Monitor Board
Statues Previously, Legion World had a brief history of Statues, as ‘The Statue of the Legendary Poster Known as Cobalt Kid’ was created during Princess Crujectra’s term as leader. The thread, often used as an ongoing joke between many posters was done on the premise that the ‘denizens of Legion World’ erected it in Cobalt Kid’s honor, which further inflated his ego. At the close of the Dark Stu Saga, a second statue was created in honor of Kid Prime, who was missing from the LMB still the close of the saga. This actually stems from Fat Cramer creating a statue of Abin Quank, although Abin declined it, prompting Fat Cramer and Arachne to change it to honor Kid Prime. During the Varalent/Quislet term of leadership, Statue threads became an ongoing part of Legion World life, and became a customary thing each month. Started by Eyrk Davis Ester, these would honor a particular poster on Legion World each month, on the premise that eventually everyone would have their own statue. This soon became tied in with the LMB mythology of the Triumvirate, as Cobalt Kid became the customary speech maker at these events, which went along with his very public and spotlight oriented personality. The premise then went along the lines that the Triumvirate used the gold and booty it secured from other worlds to pay for such wonderful adornments, as the Ancient Romans did. The first of these Triumvirate Statues was of Fat Cramer.

The Alt ID Rebellion Following a period that was highlighted specifically by the Dark Stu Saga, many posters that were prominent on the Mission Monitor Board were more inclined to begin and embroil themselves in another ongoing storyline. This led to ‘The Alt ID Rebellion’, a story that centered on Space Ranger and the Alt ID community. Previously, a long-standing LMB/Legion World subplot was that Alt IDs were seen by some as a different class, and many felt bitter towards the real poster class. Soon, many Alt IDs apparently were plotting to overthrow the ruling class (if you saw it that way), spurred on by a letter written by the imprisoned Royal Inquisitor. The Alt IDs gathered around their figure-head Space Ranger, and an apparent split began on Legion World. Encompassing a variety of threads once again, ‘The Alt ID Rebellion’ lasted for a brief period, although it never picked up the steam that the ‘Dark Stu Saga’ had. With many posters a bit burnt out on those types of stories, it faded slightly towards its conclusion.


Bits of Legionnaire Business
Gallery of Legion Arts During this period, Monkey-Eater Lad had the brilliant idea to begin a thread each month entitled “Gallery of Legion Arts”, with a specific theme for each month’s thread. These would accept submissions from all those on Legion World that were artistically inclined, whether they were drawings, coloring, photomanips, poetry, short stories, figurines or other forms of art. The first wing kicked off in April 2004 with ‘ The Mano Wing ’, and has been a mainstay of the Bits of Legionnaire Forum ever since.


Dr. Gym’lls Cultural Rarities and the Anywhere Machine
Longstanding Threads It was about during this time that a specific trend began in these two forums, that of longstanding threads. Previously, there had been a plethora of threads begun in both forums, however, during this time there was a new emphasis on keeping certain threads going, to reflect the ongoing changes in whatever topic the thread was about. For example, the “Dieter’s Support Thread” in the Anywhere Machine began and remained an ongoing mainstay of the forum, growing from a small amount of pages and gradually becoming larger to the point of being in excess of thirty pages. In Dr. Gym’lls Forum, threads dedicated to a specific comic book were started, but then were kept active by the monthly bumping of them and posters continuing the conversation from the month earlier when the previous issue had been out. Thus, a new trend of longstanding threads had begun, as these threads essentially never died, and remained active as each new ‘episode’ or ‘update’ on the topic came about.

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part III: Infinite Earths of the LMBP


Real History From the onset of the LMB, there was always a very ambiguous line in how the LMB co-existed with the Legion of Super-Heroes, the group that helped bring together the posters that formed the LMB in the first place. Sometimes it would seem like they existed in the same world, other times it seemed like the LMB lived on in the Legion’s place.

Further, LMB stories became more and more in depth and convoluted, and the eventual outgrowth into alternate worlds happened much quicker than one would suspect. The first hint of this came on the very first day of the LMB, when Shadowplay in Candlelight mistakenly referred to bellbookcandle (aka Seahorse) as a fellow girl. Taking it all in good humor, Seahorse and MLLASH decided that there must be another alternate Earth, where there was a female bellbookcandle (which would mean female Seahorse as name changes happened down the road).

Sometime later in LMB history, the poster Amber became prominent, as the LMBer Homecoming Queen. Soon after, another poster, named Umber, also became prominent, and it was established that Umber was an alternate Earth version of Homecoming Queen. However, while this left a vast array of potential LMB stories, this little thread was never followed up on until much later.

Other characters had their origins in other Earths a well: Captain Lightbulb, from a destroyed Earth, and possibly Lucifer Lass, which may or may not have been true.

After it was revealed two years later that Umber was the daughter of Cobalt Kid and Thora sent back in time to an alternate Earth, an idea session between Eryk Davis Ester, LardLad, Cobalt Kid and Bevis kick started a new line of thinking: if Umber was originally from our world, what if it was Amber who was from the alternate Earth, and was the daughter of that Earth’s Cobalt Kid and Thora, sent back in time for other reasons. This brainstorming session led to the creation of the Alternate Earths of the LMB, as well as planted the seeds for the ideas for the later Tag Team Thread “Crisis on Earth-4!” which will be covered in another section for this time period.


In Continuity

In an attempt to further understand the mystery concerning the missing daughter of Cobalt Kid and Thora, who Cobalt believed to be the LMBer Umber, four LMBers used a plethora of scientific equipment to experiment and theorize on the possibilty of there being alternate Earths existing on parallel wavelengths. Eryk Davis Ester, LardLad, Lucien Lad and Cobalt Kid began experimenting, and eventually came to some stunning conclusions. The fifth invited experimenter, Faraway Lad, mysteriously choose not to involve himself in these brainstorming sessions. note- this point is revealed in “Crisis on Earth-4!”

Earth-1 The four LMBers eventually discovered the existence of multiple Earths, all existing on a variety of frequencies and wavelengths. Being the cocky super-heroes that they were, LardLad, Cobalt Kid and Lucien Lad insisted that if they were going to start differentiating between Earths, then the one that they were on would be Earth-1.
Real History Translation Earth-1 is the Earth that houses the LMB.

Earth-2 A second Earth was observed, and interesting enough had many similar figures, which proved that each Earth may have an exact counter-part for citizens of another Earth. This Earth had a Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl, Greybird, and others.
Real History Translation Earth-2 is the DCU, with the Legion, Superman and other super-heroes.

Earth-3 A third Earth was viewed, this time with its own distinct culture and flavor, although it also had some counterpart matches to faces that were familiar to the LMB. On this Earth, there existed a Nightcrawler, a Mantis and other familiar faces.
Real History Translation Earth-3 is the Marvel Universe, with Spider-Man, the Avengers, mutants, etc.

Earth-Nil Knowing full well that Captain Lightbulb was born on another Earth that was once destroyed, LardLad crudely named his Earth, ‘Earth-nil’, rather than use a number on an Earth that no longer existed.

Earth-4 It was here that the four heroes found an Earth that was much similar to their own, although it was just far enough away that made it harder to investigate. Earth-4, it appeared, had many more counterparts than the other Earths, and apparently had its own super-hero group that mirrored the LMB of Earth-1, named the SMB. The four heroes made a vow to attempt to learn more about this Earth and what ‘SMB’ stood for.

A female Seahorse One thing that they were able to discern was that this was indeed the Earth with the female Seahorse that strangely visited Earth-1 in the first year of the LMB.

The Amber/Umber Switch The Amber/Umber switch remained a mystery at this time, although energy traces revealed that Earth-4 was indeed the Earth that Umber was brought to when she was sent backwards into the past. At this juncture, Amber was hurled from Earth-4 into the LMB’s past. Further DNA tests revealed there was a 93.45% chance that Amber was the child of Earth-4’s Cobalt Kid and Thora. Why the switch occurred in the first place remained a total mystery. At some point, Umber was able to travel back to Earth-1 to meet her counterpart Amber, sometime in the third year of the LMB, which in and of itself is a very odd occurrence that warranted further investigation.

Further revelations concerning Earth-4, the SMB and the Amber/Umber Switch will be revealed in the “Crisis on Earth-4!” Section

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part IV: Anecdotes and Adventures During the Varalent/Quislet Term


Legion World’s Twin Towers The new Headquarters for the LMB leadership is erected in the form of two large towers, one for Varalent and one for Quislet, Esq., with a saucer in the middle for deputy leader Stoopid Cat. During this time, Stoopid Cat hones his terrasact technology so that he can get to any spot on Legion World. This Terresact system becomes very useful to the select few that will eventually be able to access it.

- Right at the moment that the switch in leadership occurred, the LMB were joined by its latest recruits, Americommando (also using the name Probability Pete) and CJ Taylor, who had known the LMB before the move to Legion World. These new additions to the LMB quickly immersed themselves in Legion World culture. Speculation that CJ Taylor is an Alt ID has also secretly remained rampant, although such speculation is deemed inappropriate in public.

Struggle at the Security Office Following the elections, in which Cobalt Kid demanded all children not prophesized to be great warriors to be thrown to the lions, Quislet, Esq. begins to questions Cobalt’s sanity. Cobalt, however, insists it was a ploy to gauge the security threats of a potential other tyrannical LMB leader among the general population following the Dark Stu Saga. At this exact time, Cobalt recently returned Dev-Em to Legion World, who was off on his own espionage mission. Quislet, Esq. then began to toy around with the idea that maybe he could replace Cobalt Kid with Dev-Em as Security Chief. However a variety of things stopped this: Cobalt Kid proved he was sane, Quislet, Esq., as a master of Legion World law, realized that you could not take away Cobalt Kid’s life appointment as Chief of Security, and Dev-Em preferred to work with his friend, not against him. Following this, Dev-Em is made a full-time Security Officer, as is Furball, a constant companion of Dev-Em and former LMBer.

Golden Shower Outdoor Miner’s old arch nemesis from his days before the LMB, Golden Shower, arrives on Legion World looking for trouble. She soon becomes embroiled in a battle with the entire Office of Security, Beagle Boy, Matlock, Actor Lad and Outdoor Miner himself.

- Following the Dark Stu Saga, some members see this as the opportune time to take a break from the constant craziness and danger of LMB life. Kid Prime takes a brief absence from the group, as does Iron Rat, who needs to gather his thoughts and refocus on his mystical inner self after a strenuous term as leader and the Dark Stu Saga.

Lash’s Meth Lab Lash Lad opens ‘Lash’s Meth Lab ’, to the delight of Danny Blaine, Icefyre and Cobalt Kid, who visit it for some time. Hilarious hijinks ensue as the colorful strobe lights and heavy dance music blares in the background.

One More Festive Night at the Villa The Festive Five continue to do an immense amount of partying, particularly in Varalent’s Villa, leaving it a mess when he’s away working as co-leader of the LMB. However, seeing a period of low threat activity as a good time to decrease their status to inactive, Super Lad Kid, Condo and Magnetic Kid all become inactive members, to pursue a variety of responsibilities. Having one more blowout night as the Festive Five, Cobalt Kid and Invisible Brainiac rejoin their comrades at Vee’s Villa.

The Search for Fuddle Following the election of new leadership, a larger, ongoing search begins throughout space by the LMB, as Varalent leads a large group of LMBers into various quadrants of space to wrap up this loose end. Ultra Matt, Danny Blaine, Doctor One, Invisible Brainiac, Pagan Lass, Abin Quank, Faraway Lad, Lucien Lad and He Who Wanders join him.

-Although inactive, Shark Lad returns briefly for a traditional tussle with Furball. Interestingly enough, Furball appears to have a unique friendship with Stoopid Cat.

The Statues of the Triumvirate Seeing the welcome response of the denizens of Legion World to the statues of Cobalt Kid and Kid Prime, the Triumvirs begin using their enormous wealth and treasure to bankroll a project to create beautiful statues of LMBers around Legion World. A committee is formed to decide who is picked, headed by Triumvir Eryk Davis Ester, and these ceremonies usually included speeches by Cobalt Kid, another Triumvir. The first of these statues was of Fat Cramer . These are built by Eryk Davis Ester’s construction company, Statues, Buildings and Wondrous Architecture Construction, Co.

The Secret Bunker a secret underground bunker was found beneath Legion World by Faraway Lad, Icefyre, Quislet, Esq. and Eryk Davis Ester. Seeing the paintings on the wall, rumors began that there was some strange mystical connection to the Alt ID community there.

- As Legion World continued to change throughout this period of leadership, LMBers both new and old continue to huddle around SHAKES for good company and great spirits. Semi-Transparent Fellow waits to serve his loyal customers, and even begins caring for an increasingly depressed Giant Robotic Lesbian, who sits outside on the deck drinking, even when it rains.

-With the funds of the Legion World Triumvirate, a Legion World Orphanage and Playground was created. This was done mainly by Eryk Davis Ester, although rumors suggest that the Playground was done also for Leap Year Lass. There is no evidence to support this.

The Secret of the Seventh Super-Shocker A gang of super-powered punks called the Shockers arrives on Legion World, causing the LMB to respond when they start terrorizing the local farming community. However, six LMBers are quickly captured and administered the ‘super-shocker’: Grey Birdboy, Lash Lad, Rhino, Varalent, Icefyre and Faraway Lad. Finally, it is up to the team of Princess Crujectra and Actor Lad to attempt learn their devastating secret—only to find out its Legion World founders Nightcrawler, Lightning Lad and Saturn Girl playing a friendly prank on them.

-Floating Foxlike Creature Boy appears on Legion World, prompting Eryk Davis Ester to demand that he speak to the LMB for the first time, after receiving evidence that he was secretly a spy. He eventually recieved a reply from the notorious Lurker.

Of Evil Facial Hair The Archduke of Time returns to trouble the LMB, this time sporting a new evil half-goatee, that further alarms the LMB to the height of evil they are facing. Soon, Nightcrawler, Minesurfer, Sketch Lad, Poverty Lad, Umber, Fat Cramer and Star Boy beat him back to his own century, but not before shaving his evil facial hair. Further, when the Archduke of Time tells Umber that they are both children of the same father (re: Cobalt Kid), she says a hearty ‘ICK!’ and throws an espresso in his face.

MLLash Day April 11th is officially made MLLASH Day, a Legion World holiday to celebrate Lash Lad, the most beloved of all posters throughout space/time/internet. This tradition began when Eryk Davis Ester showed all of the various discussions concerning the great poster at the same time.

And there shall be a Giggling… The girlfriend of Faraway Lad joins him on Legion World, unveiling her giggling and lollypop powers to the LMB at large! Quickly, Gigglebot Girl is inducted into the LMB!

-Proty II journeys to Legion World to join the LMB, and becomes a prominent member for a time.

- Leap Year Lass encourages more activity from LMBers Matlock and [returning] LoneWolfLondo, who rejoins the LMB for a brief period during Varalent and Quislet’s term as co-leaders.

- Hop on Pov! becomes immensely popular as a game again on Legion World and throughout the cosmos. Poverty Lad’s celebrity status seems to skyrocket in direct response to this new fad.

Kinetic Energy The LMB gain a young new recruit, as KinetixGreenZoe enters Legion World and quickly tries out for the group. Seeing her energy and enthusiasm as definitely a good thing, they quickly induct her, and she becomes fast friends with Invisible Brainiac and Cobalt Kid.

The LMBP Super-Babies! New LMBers Gigglebot Girl and KinetizZoeGreen are forced to take control of the LMB, as all of the rest of the LMBers are suddenly turned into toddlers! With the help of a few LMB academy students, the two are able to uncover the truth behind this change: it is the work of longtime LMB enemy Salad Tosser Lord, and his new partner, Man of 1,000 Feces, who may or may not have some strange connection to Eryk Davis Ester and the Light Brigade. Note- this was a genuine tag team tale titled ‘Tag Team – the Return’, although it never had an ending

In the Valley of the Trumpets As a small army of giant brains begins mind-controlling various LMBers to act even more rudely than they normally do, Harbinger learns that the only way to free them from mind-control is to use a trumpet to shock them back to normal. Thus, Harbinger tells the LMB what to do with their trumpets and Abin Quank, Numf-El, Sonnie, Captain Dallas and others follow suit.

- At this point, the events in The Alt ID Rebellion occur, although those events will be covered in the following section. The outcome is that a lasting tension exists between Alt IDs and regular posters, as well as Alt IDs and the feline community. Space Ranger leaves the LMB (and the Security Office) for a period at this point, and the Royal Inquisitor is free once more.

Here and Now: The Future! The newest addition to the LMB makes his grand entrance, as Future arrives on the scene! Quickly becoming one of the more prominent members of the LMB, Future solves the mystery of the hidden spy inside Monkey-Eater Lad’s ankle, after Dr. Lesbon implanted it there when she treated an ill Monkey-Eater Lad and Kent Shakespeare.

The Radioactive Madness of Portfolio Boy! Portfolio Boy returned to Legion World in the guise of Obadiah Oldbuck. In trying to gain a super-power, he entered a nuclear reactor, where it appears he gained one. A massive investigation ensued, as security officers believed me may have been driven mad (a la the Green Goblin) or become a rampaging beast (a la the Hulk). He's made no comment on these accusations.

- Icefyre changes his moniker to Frostfyre for a period of time.

- The Triumvirate supervises the building of statues that are erected to honor Fat Cramer, for her role in ‘the Dark Stu Saga’, and later Invisible Brainiac , both along Statue Way.

Double-Header New Alt ID's Dyvud and Frenk, the heads of Double Header, ran rampant on Legion World for a few nights. Only Outdoor Miner could calm them, it appears, by getting them hammered. They soon after become mainstays of Legion World.

Underwear Unleashed Nipple-Ron, a mysterious devil empowered some of the LMB's greatest foes. Golden Shower, Outdoor Miner's nemesis is now Shit-Blaster, and Sanity or Madness?'s arch-nemesis has also become more hideous.

The Return of Kid Prime After an absence that lasted most of the Varalent/Quislet term of leadership, Kid Prime returns to the fold and becomes an active member of the LMB again. He quickly reopens “Kid Prime’s Room” to the delight of Legion World. He also becomes fast friends with Future.

The Return of Space Tart Space Tart, the long-lost, long thought dead wife of Cobalt Kid suddenly returns to Legion World, to everyone’s surprise, except Cobalt Kid. She is reunited with her LMB friends and rejoins the team, and quietly begins building a life for herself on Legion World. Her reunion with Cobalt Kid is behind closed doors and they attempt to finally live a married life.

- Towards the end of the Varalent/Quislet Term of Leadership, there is a decrease in LMB activity from many LMBers. Those that step back from the active duty list include: Danny Blaine, Sonnie Bloke, Portfolio Boy, Dev-Em, Furball, Emerald Empress, Proty II and LardLad.

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part V: The Alt ID Rebellion


Real History Only about a month and a half after the ‘Dark Stu Saga’, there was still a longing to continue with long-running stories that both affected the individual stories of the LMBers, and acted as a major ‘event’ on the MMB. Thus, little by little ‘The Alt ID Rebellion’ came about, as a few similar storylines intersected into one bigger one. While bringing in a variety of characters, this did not reach the level of the ‘Dark Stu Saga’ and eventually fizzled out before much of an ending could be added to it. Thus, part of its legacy was the long-lasting tension between the Alt ID community of Legion World and the regular poster community, which would later be used in subsequent MMB storylines (by Eryk Davis Ester and Cobalt Kid especially).


In Continuity

The Royal Inquisitor’s Letter Still in jail for the murder of Giant Squid during the ‘Dark Stu Saga’, The Royal Inquisitor wrote a letter to the two LMB leaders, Varalent and Quislet, Esq., saying that he could provide information on an upcoming Alt ID revolt. While the leaders are cautious to believe the word of someone they held such little respect for, word is leaked to the public at large, and soon a tension begins to mount, causing wild accusations and distrust.

Alt ID Secret Files Stoopid Cat reveals to his sister Fat Cramer that he has amassed what he calls ‘Alt ID Secret Files’, believing that his role as Deputy Leader and his status as an alt ID himself meant he had a responsibility to Legion World. He now begins hiding his "Alt ID secret files".

- Space Ranger begins acting strangely, and searches for Stoopid Cat.

Queen Connie Queen Connie, Varalent's cat, joins Legion World and quickly becomes friends with Fat Cramer and Stoopid Cat. Both she and Fat Cramer become worried about Stoopid Cat. Queen Connie becomes an official member of the LMB

-Varalent, Cobalt Kid, Outdoor Miner and Eryk Davis Ester are drawn into the mix, attempting to figure out what is going on.

Dr. K Nine Dr. K Nine, who was working with Space Ranger, captures Stoopid Cat. Stoopid Cat hurls his "Alt ID Files" into the hidden underground bunker.

-Cobalt Kid attempts to enter the bunker, but Space Ranger seals it up. It begins becoming clear that Space Ranger has alternate motivations. Formerly very close friends, a tension mounts between Cobalt Kid and Space Ranger.

-Faraway Lad, Icefyre and Abin Quank investigate the secret of the bunker further, but are unable to find anything other than clues that this may have once been a secret hiding place for Alt IDs before Legion World was created.

-Jinx is captured by Dr. K Nine.

-Space Ranger breaks Royal Inquisitor out of jail. Legion World is now in a full scale revolt, as Alt IDs join the rebellion, and other Alt IDs are hunted down by over-zealous Legion Worlders. In addition, another battle line is drawn, between felines and Alt IDs. On one side are Space Ranger and other alt ID's, and on the other side is the felines: Stoopid Cat, Fat Cramer, Queen Connie and Jinx.

- The Royal Inquisitor, now at large, uses this moment to escape the Capital City of Legion World, revealing his true colors: he could care less for the Alt ID community and cares only for his own hide.

-Varalent frees Jinx and Stoopid Cat from Dr. K Nine.

-Cobalt Kid fires Space Ranger from the Security Office, although regrets doing so, hoping that it's all a misunderstanding. He places him on a special status, where he is suspended until further notice.

-Space Ranger maintains his stance that Alt ID's need to be treated more fairly on Legion World. He still holds his views as a major Alt ID supporter, although he has now stepped down as the head of all Alt ID's. He is revered among the Alt ID community in a way similar to William Wallace and Julius Caesar.

- Fat Cramer is able to convince Queen Connie and Jinx to be calm and not let the feline/Alt ID war get out of control.

- KinetixZoeGreen joins the involved LMBers in trying to halt the ongoing battle, as they ease tensions and try and build a lasting trust again between Alt IDs and regular Legion World posters. Although the violence stops, a sense of ‘never being able to go back’ lingers.

- Showdown Finally, the mounting conflict is symbolized by a battle between Space Ranger and Stoopid Cat, longtime friends now turned bitter enemies. With Eryk Davis Ester, Cobalt Kid, Outdoor Miner, KinetixZoeGreen, Varalent and the felines caught in the middle, the battle rages on throughout Stoopid Cat’s terrasact system. When it looks like Stoopid Cat finally has no chance in beating the incredibly powerful Daxamite, he uses his terrasact technology to send him to another dimension faraway, where he is lost for some time.

-After months of searching and litigation, Cobalt Kid, Varalent and Quislet, Esq. are forced to close "The Alt ID Revolt Case", with little sense that the case is closed.

-Rumors that Stoopid Cat's "Alt ID Files" are in the possession of Cobalt Kid (Chief of Security) continue to flow through Legion World and its grapevine. It is believed that the two, who had neither cared for one another before this, have acted in unison to create a protocol for future Alt ID troubles.

- Dr. K Nine is never found from this point forward and is never prosecuted for his role in furthering this event. One theory suggests he slowly poisoned Space Ranger to encourage his new militant line of thinking. He is still wanted on charges of kidnapping.

-From this point forward, a massive search and investigation concerning the whereabouts of the Royal Inquisitor is started, and continues for months by the Security Office. Despite many officers in deep cover in the field, the search remains hopeless, although the full reasons are not disclosed until the later ‘Good, Dark and Dead’ Saga.

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part VI: Crisis on Earth-4!


Real History
During Varalent and Quislet’s term as leaders, another Tag Team thread was started in the Bits forum, entitled “Crisis on Earth-4!”. What made this different from other tag team threads is that it encompassed a variety of long-standing LMB subplots and ideas and was a long time in coming. It was natural that this thread be started, which Eryk Davis Ester did after two previous threads led to theorizing sessions on the existence of another Earth and Amber being the child of Earth-4’s Cobalt Kid ( here and here ). Thus, a plethora of ideas erupted once this new tag team story was launched, allowing long-standing questions to be answered.

This story can be found here, \'Crisis on Earth-4!\'


In Continuity
Previously:
- Vibrating on another frequency exists a parallel Earth to the LMB’s Earth-1. This Earth has been named Earth-4 [by the LMB of Earth-1].

- On this Earth, there exists ‘duplicates’ to many of the people that live on Earth-1. These duplicates often are mirror images of the counterparts, and sometimes have large or small differences that make them unique.

- It is known to the LMB that Umber and Amber (aka Homecoming Queen), both members of the LMB are counterparts of one another. Previously, it was believed that Homecoming Queen was of Earth-1 and Umber was her Earth-4 counterpart, who traveled to the LMB’s Earth through mysterious means during the third year of the LMB.

- Recently, the LMB established that Umber is most likely the baby of Earth-1's Cobalt Kid and Thora, sent back in time to Earth-4 (until she joined the LMB two years ago). Thus, it's theorized by Eryk Davis Ester, Cobalt Kid, Lucien Lad and LardLad that Homecoming Queen may be the child of Thora and Cobalt of Earth-4, sent to back to our time on our Earth. This leads one to believe that Thora and Cobalt of Earth-4 had a love affair.


Now, the story begins:
On Earth-4, a group of villains have assembled under the leadership of the Trumpeter, an arch-villain there. This assemblage of evil includes the following: Golden Shower (who has an Earth-1 counterpart that is Outdoor Miner’s nemesis), the Stalker, the Super Bartender of Space, Glamour Puss (who is the Earth-4 Lucien Lad), Thora, and Lard Lord (the Earth-4 Lard Lad). The Trumpeter reveals to him that through Thora’s science, they have discovered the existence of another Earth (Earth-1), which they intend to raid and destroy.

Previously, Lard Lord was a mighty member of the Society of Message Board Posters (aka the SMB), which is Earth-4’s counterpart to Earth-1’s LMB. Lard Lord had some sort of transcendence to the side of evil, and went on a murderous rampage. During this assault, he murdered two fellow LMBers: Cobalt Kid and Loser Lad. It should also be noted that Glamour Puss, the Earth-4 Lucien Lad, has been evil all along.

Unknown to the rest of this group of villains, the Trumpeter has his own evil motives for this journey. The Trumpeter's true plan is to unite all of the Emerald Body Parts of Ekron from Earth-1 and the Emerald Clothing of Ekron from Earth-4 (which they already have) to recreate Ekron himself!

At some point earlier in the history of the multiverse, there existed Ekron, one of the most powerful beings of all time. When he was destroyed, his body parts were scattered throughout the multiverse—his most important landing on Earth-1 and Earth-4.

It soon becomes apparent that Thora herself has alternate motives. Thora, who once loved Cobalt Kid, hates Lard Lord, who killed the Earth-4 Cobalt Kid and Earth-4 Loser Lad and is secretly plotting against him. She also has one other major objective: to find her missing daughter, who was mysteriously sent away through time and space fifteen years in the past. This was the daughter of herself and Cobalt Kid, who she named Amber, the future Queen of Taltar. It was through her search for Amber that she was able to discover the existence of Earth-1. Upon learning this knowledge, she sought out one of the most cunning minds in the galaxy, the Trumpeter.

The SMB is on Earth-4, the counterparts of the LMB of Earth-1. Unlike the LMB, however, the SMB have fallen on some particularly hard times. They also have strong differences to the LMB.

On Earth-4, Portfolio Girl, Salad Tosser Lad and Invisible Brainiac, all SMBers, stumble across Thora’s plan. Invisible Brainiac and Salad Tosser Lad are captured, but Portfolio Girl and her pet toad get away. Salad Tosser Lad becomes Glamour Puss's prisoner for a specific reason, while Invisible Brainiac becomes an experiment to Thora. Thora plans on using Invisible Brainiac in some way, possibly against Lard Lord.

The Trumpeter dispatches the Stalker to find Faraway Lad of Earth-4, to use his power to get to Earth-1. He also uses the Super Bartender of Space, Faraway Lad’s worst enemy (because of his weakness to port and dark lagers) to bait him.

Faraway Lad of Earth-4 is hidden with some secret ally that knows a lot of what's going on. However, the Stalker is able to find him, and the Super Bartender of Space subdues and captures Faraway Lad of Earth-4 by using port and dark lager against him. The Stalker, showing a new degree of ruthlessness, then kills the Super Bartender of Space, because he was no longer important to the Trumpeter's plans. He brings Faraway Lad of Earth-4 to Thora and the Trumpeter, and they turn him into a giant portal to Earth-1. The secret ally of Far of Earth-4 mysteriously disappears.

Meanwhile, Lash Lad of Earth-4 and his wife, Linda Lake (who was once known as Stretchable Lass), are having a picnic, which Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-4 is at. Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-4 maintains control over a Luck Lord whenever he says the word "Jeepers". He says it, naturally as always, and sensing the upcoming Crisis, the luck lord switches EDE of Earth-4 with EDE of Earth-1, to help avert the Crisis.

On Earth-4, the Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-1 arrives and Lash Lad, Linda Lake, and other SMBers Intelligent Mountain Lion, Twilightcrawler, Lightning Lass and Saturn Guy begin to figure out that this is a different EDE.

On Earth-1, Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-4 appears, and after an exchange, Cobalt Kid, Varalent, Spellbinder and Harbinger find out that this isn't their Eryk either. They journey back to Legion World and bring him to Doctor One. There, the Doctor, with the help of EDE's luck lord, proves Cobalt's theory of multiple Earth's is correct.

Meanwhile on Earth-4, Thora uses Faraway Lad of Earth-4 as a portal, and dispatches Lard Lord, Glamour Puss and Golden Shower to get the Emerald body parts of Ekron. They become aware that these are stored on Legion World, in the LMB’s Repository for Lost Artifacts. She also secretly dispatches the Stalker to find Homecoming Queen and Umber.

Portfolio Girl, who got away earlier, journeys to her Earth-4 comrades, the SMB (led by the Earth-4 Seahorse, a girl) aboard their Satellite Headquarters. Earlier, Ratmage (the Earth-4 STU) sensed something is wrong. The SMB assembles: Ratmage, Monkey-Eater Lad, Kid Heavyfeathers, Outdoor Miner, Atypical Lass, Sonnie Bloke, Satan Claws Cramer, Shark Lad, Future, Seahorse and Insanity and Madness!. The assembled SMB (those mentioned above) hear her story, and now aware of the LMB they begin holding hands and chanting along to Ratmage's spell, to contact the LMB of Earth-1...

Now on Earth-4, Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-1 is so stunned by what’s happening, that he utters the word “jeepers!”. Suddenly, a new Luck Lord appears, and asks what it can do for Eryk! He asks that it help figure out what’s going on, and the group of heroes are suddenly transported to the SMB Satellite!

On Earth-1, the three Earth-4 villains Golden Shower, Lard Lord and Glamour Puss begin to attack and ravage Legion World. While Lard Lord terrorizes the people, Glamour Puss succeeds in stealing all of the Emerald Body Parts of Ekron, which had been stored by the LMB earlier in the year.

Cobalt Kid and Varalent, now joined by Abin Quank, the only active LMBer on Legion World at the time, begin battling Lard Lord, believing it to be their ally Lard Lad, which gives him the upper hand. Golden Shower further complicates the situation.

The Stalker, also on Legion World, succeeds in finding Amber and Umber, who are both on a shopping spree, with Thora, of all people. The Stalker suddenly attacks, and steals the two girls away, unaware that this was ironically the day that Thora was going to tell Umber that she was her mother! Putting up a fight, the two girls soon fall to the Stalker’s might and he joins Glamour Puss, who sends them all back to Earth-4.

Suddenly, things got strange, as the Crisis began expanding beyond all control and the universes all suddenly began to die out! The mysterious ally of Earth-4's Faraway Lad revealed himself to the being known as The Phantom Stranger! The Phantom Stranger plucked Faraway Lad of Earth-1 from the time stream and explained to him the ongoing problems with Earth-1, Earth-4 and the Faraway Lad of Earth-4. Faraway Lad of Earth-1 tries to help his buddies Cobalt and Invisible Brainiac by messing with the time stream, but the Phantom Stranger does not allow him to succeed. The Stranger explains to Faraway Lad what he must do, to stop the villains and save the Earths. Using his power (but exhausting himself for the time being), the Phantom Stranger is able to keep Earth's 1 and 4 alive for awhile longer, so the LMB and SMB can save the multiverse. If Faraway Lad fails, all of the Earths will die.

Little is known about the Phantom Stranger; save that he exists in all Earth's simultaneously and thus has no counter-part. He also likes to work with the Faraway Lad's because they unknowingly have the sole power necessary to naturally travel across the various Earths.

With Earth-1 and Earth-4 restored, reality blinks back into existence, with Earht-1 being attacked by Lard Lord and Golden Shower of Earth-4. As Cobalt Kid, Varalent, Abin Quank, Doctor One, Harbinger, Spellbinder and Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-4 battle on, Glamour Puss escapes back to Earth-4 with the body parts of Ekron, while the Stalker returns with Amber and Umber.

Thora, now insane with anger and revenge, suddenly changes all plans! Thora of Earth-4 uses Invisible Brainiac, who she had captured, and turns him into a high powered laser beam, firing through the Earth-4 Faraway Lad/portal into Earth-1, and directly into Lard Lord, who she hated for killing her lover, Cobalt Kid. This massive blast of light shoots into Lard Lad, with tremendous force, murdering him instantly, as well as the Earth-4 Invisible Brainiac. Subsequently, a burst of mega-energy explodes outwards, as the full force between Invisible Brainiac’s light energy and Lard Lord’s Lardforce erupts. Abin Quank and Cobalt Kid are able to funnel it directly into space, so save Legion World.

However, this had been part of the Trumpeter’s plan all along. Knowing full well that Thora would not rest until Lard Lord was destroyed, he planned for this massive explosion of energy, and is able to harness it and drag it back into Earth-4. Using this explosive and massive ball of energy, the Trumpeter forges together the Emerald Body Parts of Ekron and the Emerald Clothing of Ekron once more, creating the most awesome force of power in the history of all that is. Only one final item remains: the Emerald Nelly Cap of Ekron.

Unsure of how to proceed, the LMB are suddenly given quite the clue: The SMB of Earth-4, using a crystal ball and holding hands via Ratmage’s spell, are able to appear before the LMB for the first monumental meeting of the SMB and the LMB! The LMB, now in possession of the Earth-4 Golden Shower, make the villainess spill the beans, and they reveal the location of Thora’s laboratory. The SMB quickly get on their way there.

While the SMB is away, Faraway Lad (of Earth-1) appears, and tells them that there is a far more dangerous threat at hand: Ekron himself! He has them sound the general alarm, and all of the LMB is called into action.

On Earth-4, the SMB mount a fast attack on Thora’s laboratory, only to discover that this was a trap all along! They soon battle the Stalker, but are able to over power him through sheer numbers. While Shark Lad and Seahorse free the Faraway Lad of Earth-4 (who was left abandoned with the portal now closed), Kid Heavy-Feathers finds a damaged and overwhelmed Salad-Tosser Lad. However, these distractions serve a higher purpose—Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-1 is left alone for a moment, allowing the Trumpeter to attack!

The Trumpeter attacks Eryk of Earth-1, and reveals that he is only after one thing: his Nelly Cap! It is then that the Trumpeter reveals a bombshell: the longtime nelly cap of Eryk Davis Ester, which had become such an important part of LMB lore, was actually none other than THE EMERALD NELLY CAP OF EKRON!!! The Trumpeter grabs the cap, and takes off to finish his plan!

Uttering a ‘jeepers’, Eryk sees the Luck Lord appear once more, who reveals his true origin: Eryk always had a mastery of luck and calamities, and had always been able to summon a Luck Lord if he wanted. However, in his early years, he came across a nelly cap that he could not help but feel compelled to wear and love, and always wore it thereafter. This nelly cap was the Emerald Nelly Cap of Ekron, which scarred the Luck Lord too much for it to come out and serve Eryk. With it now safely removed, the Luck Lord would be able to help Eryk whenever he muttered the word ‘Jeepers!”.

The Trumpeter, now with the Emerald Nelly Cap, returns to the reborn Ekron, and places the cap upon his head! Suddenly, the powerful being arises once more, awake and ready to destroy all that is! Ekron himself, who transcends multiverses, begins his assault on all that is left (re: Earth-1 and Earth-4).

The SMB, now disheartened, are unsure what to do. It is the hurt Faraway Lad of Earth-4 that tells them: they must join their new LMB allies! At that same time, the LMB have assembled en masse—for the biggest assemblage of LMBers in their history. Faraway Lad of Earth-1, now aware of the other Faraway Lad’s plans, helps open a portal, as the two Faraway Lad’s reveal their power: all Faraway Lad’s of all Earth’s, can move between Earths. Opening up a portal, the two allow the SMB and the LMB to finally meet face to face!

While the Eryks are safely returned and Golden Shower and the Stalker sent to prison, the LMB sees how horrible things have become for the SMB. Making a coordinated effort, they begin to do everything they can to lift their spirits. Even seeing Cobalt Kid and Loser Lad again helps make things better, even if they’re from different Earths. Now: it is time to fight back.

The Assault on Thora of Earth-4
While the rest of the LMB figure out what to do next, a small strike team prepares to battle Thora, who killed Lard Lord and Invisible Brainiac, and now holds Amber and Umber hostage. Lash Lad of Earth-1, Lash Lad of Earth-4, Seahorse of Earth-4, Portfolio Girl of Earth-4, Crusader of Earth-1, Beagle Boy of Earth-1 and Lucien Lad of Earth-1 lead the assault! After it becomes apparent that Thora is insane with rage, they are able to free the two young female LMBers, who don’t understand what’s happening. It if finally the LMB’s secret weapon that does it: Cobalt Kid of Earth-1. Believing this to be her Cobalt, Thora lowers her guard, and reveals that she is not as horrible as one may seem. Cobalt comforts her for a moment, before he nods to Crusader to shut down her brain. Wondering what is going to happen next, they are not surprised to see the Phantom Stranger appear on the scene!

The Amber/Umber Switch
At last, the truth behind the Amber/Umber switch is revealed. The Phantom Stranger became aware of the Trumpeter’s plans a year earlier, and knew that the return of Ekron could possibly mean the end of all things. He would not be able to battle Ekron directly, as that was not how his powers worked. So, he organized things so that the babies of Cobalt Kid and Thora, both born on the same day on different Earths, were sent backwards in time by 15 years. However, they were sent to opposite Earths, so that Homecoming Queen went to Earth-1 and Umber to Earth-2. This accomplished two major things: first, it made the LMB and SMB aware of each other, if only slightly, and second, the energies used in doing this made Amber and Umber both immune to the entropic energies that had been created through Ekron’s plan. The Phantom Stranger further sent Umber back from Earth-4 to Earth-1 three years earlier, as further contact between Amber and Umber further strengthened this immunity. Finally, the Stranger turns to the two girls, and tells them that it’s up to them. Beagle Boy finally asks the Phantom Stranger: ‘who are you, and what exactly is it you do’. Which he replied: ‘you know me, whether you realize it or not. And I can give looks.’ ‘Looks?” asked Portfolio Girl, to which he replied ‘Yes. And sometimes, they are more than enough to kill.” With that, he vanished, although it was Lucien Lad who first realized what they had just been told.

The Emerald Might of Ekron
Thus, the assault on Ekron began, as the combined might of the entire SMB and the entire LMB journey to the dimension outside of the known multiverse via the Faraway Lad’s, and confronted Ekron and the Trumpeter. While a small group battled the Trumpeter (which the Eryk’s via their Luck Lords were able to defeat), the combined rest of the teams launched a massive assault on Ekron, creating the single biggest battle in the history of either team.

The battle raged on, as hero after hero used their unique abilities to battle Ekron. Finally, it is the duo of Homecoming Queen and Umber, further powered by the various LMBers and SMBers, who take the final fight to Ekron, ripping open his new energy shell and lunging inside his entropic energy self, hammering away from within with heightened strength. With the entire universe in the balance, they are able to defeat Ekron and destroy him.


Epilogue
- Following the battle, the LMB and the SMB enjoy each other’s company and have a nice relaxing session. The SMB appear to be inspired by the LMB, and gain a new positive outlook on heroing, that reminds them more of their earliest days. They decide that from this point on, the two teams should meet up every year to get to know one another better.

- The Trumpeter, a mind-shut Thora, the Stalker and Golden Shower are imprisoned on Earth-4. Glamour Puss remains at large.

- A small funeral is held for Earth-4’s Invisible Brainiac, as Earth-1’s Invisible Brainiac gives a speech. In a more quiet ceremony, Lard Lord is laid to rest. Lard Lad of Earth-1 appears in shock by the lack of support by the SMB, and Cobalt Kid and Loser Lad try to comfort him.

- Amber and Umber return to Earth-1 together, and the LMB is delighted that this mystery has finally been solved. Apparently, Umber herself still doesn’t quite ‘get it’ that Cobalt Kid and Thora are her parents.

- Eryk Davis Ester of Earth-1 regains his nelly cap, now forever depowered of its Ekron essence. He now gains full control over his Luck Lord.

- Ekron is destroyed and all his body parts/clothing are no more.

- The Faraway Lad’s of both Earth’s now gain a new responsibility: they alone are responsible for traveling from Earth to Earth, and they form a unique bond in this way. They also share a unique bond with the Phantom Stranger.

- The Phantom Stranger says farewell, but not before the LMB can make him an honorary member. He says he’ll be there when he’s needed, and a certain enlightened few give him a hug, saying ‘I know’.

- The LMB return to their Earth, looking forward to once again learning more about the SMB of Earth-4!

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part VII: The SMB of Earth-4!


Roll Call

• Seahorse (Leader) - the current leader of the SMB, who is also a female.
• Ratmage (Deputy Leader) – Earth-4 Stu, and lover of Seahorse
• Atypical Lass
• Outdoor Miner
• Invisible Brainiac
• Salad Tosser Lad
• Beagle Boy
• Portfolio Girl
• Monkey Eater Lad
• Lightning Lass
• Saturn Guy
• Twilightcrawler
• Stupendous Mountain Lion (the Earth-4 Stoopid Cat) - whose wisdom and intuition has saved the SMB on more than one occasion!
• Kid Heavyfeathers - When Grey Birdboy and Danny Blaine switched powers, he gained the power to make things heavy, leading to his new moniker
• Satan Claws Cramer
• Shark Lad
• Sonnie Bloke
• Insanity or Madness
• Faraway Lad!
• Eryk Davis Ester* - who can summon a Luck Lord by saying the word “Jeepers!”

*SMB Mascot

Retired

• Lash Lad – who retired to marry his longtime girlfriend Linda Lake
• Stretchable Lass – aka Linda Lake, who only served for a brief period to be closer to Lash Lad
• Numf-El - Currently, Numf is no longer an SMBer. He is president of the UP.
• Danny Blaine- After switching powers with Grey Birdboy, Danny gained tracking abilities. He then left the SMB to pursue a writing career.

Evil

• Lard Lord - who went on a murderous killing spree, killing SMBers Cobalt Kid and Loser Lad! He was recently killed by Thora in recent “Crisis on Earth-4!” story
• Lucien - who joined only briefly before being revealed as a traitor!

Dead

• Cobalt Kid – killed by Lard Lord
• Loser Lad – killed by Lard Lord
• Invisible Brainiac – killed by Thora in recent “Crisis on Earth-4!” story
• Lard Lord – evil for a long period of time, recently killed by Thora in recent “Crisis on Earth-4!” story

Not super on Earth-4

• Varalent - who is in fact a small shop owner

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part VIII: The Election of Outdoor Miner and Reboot


Real History At first, it seemed that having another election might not be the route that many LMBers would want to go, in light of the last election. However, a thread begun by Cobalt Kid sprung many into action, where it looked like the majority of LMBers would find it positive, which was further helped by Kid Prime giving his support. Not surprisingly, this had been an issue that Varalent and Quislet (LMB co-leaders) had been discussing privately, and they had prepared for their own election procedures, which began shortly thereafter.

During this election, it became the new standard to nominate oneself. The main consequence of this was that a plethora of Alt IDs nominated themselves, which led to an explosion of silly-ness and campaigning threads.

When the results were in, it appeared that Sanity or Madness? (now known as Reboot) was the new LMB Leader, and Outdoor Miner was the new Deputy Leader. However, later on, it would be revealed that there was a bit of tampering with the election results, and the poll was a bit off. In all actuality, it was actually Outdoor Miner that was the rightful leader, and Sanity or Madness? that was the deputy leader.

The following nominated themselves for leadership:

Dr. Mayavale
Thora
Obadiah Oldbuck (aka Portfolio Boy)
Sanity or Madness? (now known as Reboot)
Umber
Actor Lad
Outdoor Miner
Computo Jr.
Koko
Sir Prize (an alt ID whose identity remained a mystery)

Note to all reading—throughout this entire timeline, I’ve tried to focus on positive aspects of the history, and not the side stuff that at the time seemed distressful, but in hindsight does not seem to be the biggest deal. This will be no different.


In Continuity

At the close of Varalent and Quislet’s term as co-leaders, the new LMB Leadership Elections where held. Prompted by Cobalt Kid, Kid Prime and others, Quislet and Varalent reformatted the election process to make it so that nominations were now self-nominations.

One side effect was the massive emersion of Alt IDs looking to be leader of the LMB. New Alt IDs Sir Prize, who identity remained a mystery, Computo Jr. and older alt ID Koko nominated themselves. After being secretly asked by the Royal Inquisitor to nominate himself, Dr. Mayavale saw the benefit to the people of Legion World (in his own mind) if he were leader.

To show her seriousness in acting as a true leader of the LMB, Umber ditched the ‘Boyz’ that had been her constant companions since traveling to Earth-1 back in the third year of the LMB. While Brock went to college, Cliff went home to Earth-4 and Ashe remained on Legion World (because of his ‘fondness’ for the boys). The newly returned Space Tart and Saturn Girl became Umber's biggest supporters.

LMB stalwarts Sanity or Madness?, Actor Lad, Obadiah Oldbuck and Outdoor Miner (after some prompting from Cobalt Kid) also nominated themselves.

Campaigning ensued and even more craziness than ever before became an ongoing event at Legion World. Other alt IDs were thrown into the mix, which secretly worried Eryk Davis Ester, who felt that this could spark some of the tensions still left over from the ‘Alt ID Rebellion’, or worse, be part of some plan by Space Ranger. Luckily, neither of these things occurred.

Lightning Lad also made a public announcement that he would strike anyone with lightning that voted for Umber or Koko.

After much anticipation, the vote revealed that Sanity or Madness? was the Leader of the LMB and Outdoor Miner the deputy leader, although there had been some secret tampering that did not come to light right away. The true leader should have been Outdoor Miner, and deputy Sanity or Madness?

Minor Anecdotes following the Election
- Following the previous election, the large amount of alt IDs that were on Legion World remained a major part of the activity there.

- Previously more outskirt members of the LMB community on Legion World, like Thora and Dr. Mayavale, now became more central members to the community.

- Sir Prize and Computo Jr. largely vanished and have not been seen since.

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part IX: The LMB at the End of Varalent and Quislet’s Term


Here is the active LMB roster at roughly exact time that Varalent and Quislet's term as leader came to an end:

Varalent (Co-Leader)
Quislet, Esq (Co-Leader)
Stoopid Cat (Deputy Leader)
Lash Lad
Cobalt Kid
Mystery Lad
Spellbinder (aka Princess Crujectra)
Grey Birdboy
Rhino
Beagle Boy
Sketch Lad
Lucien Lad
Space Tart
Faraway Lad
The Boy with Ultra Powers
Poverty Lad
Umber
Leap Year Lass (aka Thriftshop Debutante)
Kid Prime
Eryk Davis Ester
Fat Cramer
Nightcrawler
Matlock
Minesurfer
He Who Wanders
Lightning Lad
Saturn Girl
Sanity or Madness? (now known as Reboot)
Outdoor Miner
Arachne
Rickshaw
DrakeB3001
Tromium Crystal
White Raven
Star Boy
Obadiah Oldbuck (aka Portfolio Boy)
Blockade Boy
Super Lad Kid
Semi-Transparent Fellow
Frostfyre (aka Icefyre)
Abin Quank
Harbinger
Numf-El
Invisible Brainiac
Doctor One (aka Juan)
Monkey-Eater Lad
Captain Dallas
Kent Shakespeare
Actor Lad
Bicycle Repair Man
Pagan Lass
CJ Taylor
Americommando (aka Probability Pete)
Gigglebot Girl
KinetixZoeGreen (now known as Luna aka High Priestess Viviane)
Queen Connie
Future


LMB Reservists
Crusader
Maxx
LMB Spectre
Kid Gender Reversal Stereotype II
Marvin of the Brood

Honorary LMBers
The SMB of Earth-4
Hummer Lass
The Phantom Stranger
Santa Claus
Everyday Girl
Something else else Amazing

Year Five: Varalent & Quislet, Esq.’s Term
Part X: An Overview of Year Five


Without any doubt, year five saw the most dramatic change in the history of the LMB—to the point, actually, where it becomes extremely difficult to put into words an accurate summary.

At the onset of year five, the LMB and the online community on the old DCMB Legion Boards had truly merged into one large community, and had established themselves as the new community on their home, Legion World. Nightcrawler and Lightning Lad’s gift of Legion World truly was a ‘gift’ as it created, after many years of struggling, a home for this larger community.

Throughout year one of Legion World, a plethora of change affected this new, larger LMB. People forged new friendships and interacted with new people, as some friends established their presence and faded a bit into the background, and others slowly emerged as a major presence. Longtime friends, both former LMBers and others, returned to the fold, as the community continued to grow exponentially.

The first year encompassed a sense of getting used to the board—the newness of it created an energy that spread like wildfire and produced immense, constant activity. From Alt IDs, to ongoing LMB storylines in the MMB, to the Dark Stu Saga and other ‘event stories’, the LMB-central themes exploded. This, however, only encompasses one small percentage of the activity occurring on Legion World, as all other varieties of threads became persistent, which does not even take into account the larger conversation on comic books, let alone the Legion of Super-Heroes, in a forum whose activity rivaled the MMB.

With only one year under its belt, Legion World was still new, and this larger LMB was still growing and changing constantly. But once again, there was a sense that something had been established and that there was an adhesive community that was not going to be going anywhere. As change would occur in the next year, as it always must, the ‘launch’ period had come to a close, and a new direction began.

Friendship, however, no matter how distant the friends were, remained the central theme to this community.