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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
My brother spoke to me last night about a comic he read, about a boy and his father growing farther apart as the boy becomes an adult, until the father dies. He equated it to his relationship with our dad right now, and how our dad might just keep getting sicker and sicker until he dies, with my brother hating him, even though he might be so sick he doesn't realize something's wrong with him.
My nana hated my brother. She spoiled me, I love her, but she hated him. Maybe because he reminded her of her ex-husband, my dad's dad, the bastard.
My brother talked about his boyfriend, how this guy makes him feel beautiful and special and not like a freak.
My mother has Anthony, my brother has Tabes, and I have Nei and you guys. Thank you. Thank you so, so much.
My brother called me a beautiful person, inside and out, and said I was compassionate.
I don't even fully remember the entire conversation.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081 |
You deserve the compliments.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081 |
I would think your brother would know you pretty well.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 22,669
Fabulous and Sparkly!
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Fabulous and Sparkly!
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 22,669 |
Sarky, I haven't posted in this thread before, but I'd like to share this with you. My parents are in the final stages of divorcing. They've been married 49 years. My mom finally just couldn't take my dad's crap any more and left him. Last fall she moved to Houston to be closer to me--she now has her own condo, less than a minute's walk from mine.
My point is family drama doesn't get easier. Even when we're adults, as we both are (albeit, I've been one a lot longer), and you fully understand that your parents' issues are theirs and not yours, it's still hard.
Hang in there and, please, continue to let us know how we can help you.
The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Your parents are getting divorced? I'm sorry.
Mine aren't even legally separated yet.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Although it's nice that she's able to live near you.
Um, I hate to ask, but what's your dad been doing?
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 22,669
Fabulous and Sparkly!
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Fabulous and Sparkly!
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 22,669 |
Mother and I went to Florida for a few days last month for mediation for their divorce. They reached a settlement and it will be final sometime this month.
My dad is alone in the house in Florida we moved into when I was 12. About fifteen years ago, one of my sisters (who now lives in Illinois) told him that if he didn't stop being verbally abusive and alienating people, one day he'd be left all alone.
She was right.
The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
I feel like you're describing my dad.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
I should mention I saw the friend of my dad who... asked him about possibly getting a urine sample from my brother or myself. His mother stays at the nursing home. The only words I said to him were "bye" as he was leaving.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773
Active
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Active
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773 |
good for you, to bad you can tell his parole officer
  /l、 ゙(゚、 。 7  l、゙ ~ヽ  じしf_, )ノ
i do commissions
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
I don't believe he has one. I don't think he's ever been in jail.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
I didn't go to the nursing home today because I didn't feel like seeing my dad. Or because I was lazy. I've been coming in late a lot at the nursing home lately.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Looks like I dodged a bullet.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Ugh. I left early today instead of dealing with my dad.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Well, nothing to report on the home front.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Today my mother told me that the last time she spoke to my dad he mentioned that "there was bad news" and that "she'll knows when he knows". I talked to him at the nursing home, and it turns out it's a doctor's appointment. And I was mad because he didn't tell my mom that, so it sounded as if something bad might've happened to Nana, or my aunt, or my godmother's mom.
I know I probably shouldn't have asked, but I couldn't ignore it if there was something wrong with him, or anyone.
...
And I just found out my mother was married for three months when she was 19.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
So, my brother and I are having dinner and watching a movie at my dad's. I'm not looking forward to it.
You guys ever seen that Simpsons episode where Milhouse's parents get divorced? It's like being with Milhouse's dad.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
My brother, apparently, is not getting an 18th birthday party because my mother doesn't have the money and my dad is a deadbeat piece of @#$%^&%$^^.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Well, you guys said to keep you updated.
First off, disregard the birthday post. Not even bothering to get into what happened there.
My brother and mom are both sick, different things, for a couple of days now.
On either wednesday or thursday, my dad found out brother was sick. He called mom just to curse and scream at her, regardless that she's sick as well.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
So...
I still haven't been able to get tickets for Big Apple Con and it's Friday. It looks like I'll have to, though.
I learned my mom's friend is planning a surprise party for my brother on Friday, so, I might need to get the tickets just for me and my brother to make sure my dad doesn't bother my brother on friday. And he kept calling me today, saying about doing something on my brother's ACTUAL birthday on Saturday.
Of course my brother doesn't want to talk to him, and I finally told my dad that he shouldn't b!tch to me because it's brother he needs to talk to, and if brother doesn't want to talk to him that's not my fault.
I don't know, um, I haven't exactly been doing the reading homework I've been assigned to my classes. I left early Tuesday because the weather looked crappy and I was still feeling a bit sick, but I think I just did it because I wanted to go home. Whenever I got sick in middle and high school I'd always bitch and moan until I finally got to stay home or they let me leave. Even if I wasn't really that sick. My brother says I'm not, but I think that makes me spineless.
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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OP
Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
I went to see my aunt (dad's sister) to see if she had any money for me. She had twenty dollars.
She was also ranting about how I should be asking my mom for money, called her a koksucker, said my mom charged out all of my grandpa's credit cards (how would she even know), and then said I should be ashamed of myself for when I hit my dad while still being a b!tch.
Okay, last year, when this all started, there was a day when my dad was yelling at my mom over the phone. My brother was freaking out, he threw a thing of pencils and pens at the wall, and then he had a panic attack on the floor. I had to slap my dad in the face in order to get him off the phone to see what it was doing to my brother.
My dad said I shouldn't tell anything to my mom or else I might be starting a war. He made me promise. But I'm pretty sure I HAVE to tell her because how else would my aunt know something about my grandpa's credit cards? What do you guys think I should?
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Re: Family Issues
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081 |
Try not to be the cause of any drama. You promised not to tell.
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