Legion World Forums LEGION COMPANION Spaceopoly Nasty Genie

Granted - all cars are now driven by robots. You never get to drive your car again.

I wish all our family and friends supported me and Blaze.

Granted! The only drawback is now they're swamping you with pictures of cute babies available for immediate adoption, because they think you should embark on parenthood and settle down.

I wish for an end to all junk mail and email spam.

Granted. The Internet and the postal system both break down suddenly and irreparably.

I wish I could split myself into multiple clones (just like Multiple Man!)

Granted! The split is permanent though.

I wish I can speak Mandarin fluently.

Goodness. What would we do with so many IB's running around

You can, but it's the only language you can speak. Oh well, at least now you can explore China!

I wish I were 1000% more efficient at work, without having to take on added responsibility.

Granted! you work more 1000% efficiently, but also face a 99.99% pay cut.

I wish that however the evil genie twists this wish, it is worse for him/her than it is for me.

Granted! The evil genie manages to twist your wish by not granting it at all. For breach of genie contract, he is fired and replaced by...

an even nastier genie. Have fun, Kent.


I wish I had a dummy who would take all the negative consequences of all my wishes, leaving me to enjoy them without any drawbacks.

Granted, he leaves you and all your wishes on a desert planet, and takes away all the "d'raubax" -- the one form of indigenous food.

I wish people would stop trying to cheat the genie out of his fun.

Granted - we all stop making wishes, and the game ends!

......
......
......

Nah, couldn't do that.

I wish I had perfect skin.

Granted, your skin is so perfect that everyone is clamoring for a look which pleases you to no end. Unfortunately, the smog and rough fibers of your clothing are incompatible with your perfect but oh-so-delicate skin. Therefore, you are placed naked in a transparent hermetic capsule in the middle of Times Square so that all may gaze upon your perfection.

........

I wish I could rewind my life for a do-over, starting at 17, keeping all the knowledge I've gained.

Isn't a tiny bit of that knowledge about how the genie ruins every wish? :-)

Granted, so now you're doing your life over exactly as before. Or did you want to be able to change things? Ah, well you might have said that. But at least you know every single moment before it happens, even if you're helpless to do anything about it.

Must be fun knowing when that hammer is about to hit your thumb...

I wish people would stop trying to cheat the genie out of his fun.

Yes, I wished it again, because it was not granted!

Granted - but the genie is replaced by an even meaner genie. Oy. Well, your wish only covered that one particular genie...

I wish I had perfect 6-pack abs.

Granted! You now have that perfect 6-pack abs but society changed it's standards of beauty. Flabs are the new abs.

I wish I can read faster.

Granted. You become faster in everything... including in bed. You now can only last 30 seconds, leaving me to take care of myself

I wish I had a new laptop, car and phone that would never break or need replacing, and that would automatically upgrade themselves to match the latest technology.

Granted. They have replaced your limbs - your torso sticks out of the car's roof and you have a phone on one shoulder and a laptop on the other.

I wish I could be healthy and feel fine without sleep.

Granted. You can never sleep again, but the drugs they're pumping into your system make you feel fine.

If you ever discontinue those for even an hour, though...

I wish my family wasn't nosy at all and would let me do whatever I please without questioning me too much.

Granted. All of your family has fallen under the spell of a new charismatic prophet and joined the Church of Kyle. Devotees are not allowed to associate with non-believers, even family members, other than to insincerely ask, "how are you?"

I wish for an un-thwartible wish of my choice that will come true.

Granted. You choose to wish for nothing.

I wish Semi came aroud more often.

Granted. Unfortunately, your posting time is cut in half and you never seem to be online at the same time as Semi.

I wish ALL inactive posters would come back more often (and all current posters would maintain their levels of activity too!)

Granted!

I'll start by hijacking every thread to tell you all the good news about Herbalife™!

I wish the cats would stop turning up their noses at their dinner and just eat the food we bought them without fussing.

Granted! The cats eats their food with relish. Unfortunately, it gives them horrible diarrhea all over your kitchen floor.

I wish I would never have anxiety.

Granted. You become one of the Metal Men! What element would you like to be?


I wish I could go bungee jumping this weekend.

Granted! You will now be contractually obligated to bungee jump all day Saturday and Sunday between the hours of 6 AM and 6 PM.

I hope you packed the really durable cord. Oh, and you might want to plan on abstaining from food between 6 PM Thursday and 6 AM Sunday, just in case.

I wish I could afford to pay in cash for all the home repairs chez_cleome so desperately needs.

Granted! You can afford to - but all branches of your bank close save the one in Kazakhstan. By the time the money is wired to you, you'll end up having to buy a new house.

(Though that won't be so bad )

I wish someone else would do my work for me (without me getting demoted or fired).

Granted!

You won't be demoted or fired, but your new job is being their gofer for the princely sum of ten bucks a week. No weekends off, either.

Did I mention that they yell a lot and wear really cheap cologne in lieu of ever showering?

I wish I could afford a bigger freezer and some space for it, so I could stockpile more summer goodies for the cold weather season.