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Re: Limericks #386197 03/26/06 05:55 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 The ice hockey team from Waikiki Was really rather quite sneaky They couldn't skate So they used naked Kate To distract by ice-dancing freaky. NEXT: A beauty queen from Algonquin (Rhymes with "shin")

Re: Limericks #386198 03/27/06 02:56 PM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer A beauty queen from Algonquin Was trying to shout above the din To order a jar In a Sudbury bar She feared she had become a has-been. NEXT: A girl and a duck and a moose Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #386199 03/27/06 07:23 PM Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 29,461 Hudson Valley Kent Shakespeare Time Trapper Kent Shakespeare Time Trapper Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 29,461 Hudson Valley A girl and a duck and a moose Rode the rails in a caboose In one maneuver They came to Vancouver Where they took in a Canada goose NEXT: You ought to go to Ottawa The childhood friend Exnihil never had.

Re: Limericks #386200 03/27/06 07:47 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 You ought to go to Ottawa Or to Niagara for the Shaw Or Grand Bend for the beach Ontario's within your reach And while you're there, go see my ma. NEXT: I grew up on a Great Lake

Re: Limericks #386201 03/27/06 07:49 PM Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia legionadventureman Wanderer legionadventureman Wanderer Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia You ought to go to Ottawa Where the weather is not quite hottewer Scream if you heard this But not all is bliss Riding the back of an otter - wha? NEXT: Let's all go for a swim

Re: Limericks #386202 03/28/06 01:37 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston I grew up on a Great Lake Upon the beach we would make sand castles gigantic Mom would get frantic and yell at my brother Jake. Let's all go for a swim to stay fit and trim diet & exercise stay away from fries And you'll be known as "Slim" NEXT: What did Alice see in the bedroom? Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #386203 03/28/06 02:13 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 What did Alice see in the bedroom, Peering out at her from the gloom? Was it a ghoul Dripping with drool Arisen from hell to seal her doom? NEXT, Not a ghoul, she was relieved to find

Re: Limericks #386204 03/29/06 11:48 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Not a ghoul, she was relieved to find just a mouse, but one that's blind a little squeak so don't freak a little cheese would be so kind NEXT: From the parlor walked the lazy cat Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #386205 03/29/06 04:26 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 From the parlor walked the lazy cat Oh so slowly 'cause she was so fat From eating field mice Over warm fried rice And once in a while a large juicy rat. NEXT: The dog looked at the cat with disdain

Re: Limericks #386206 03/30/06 03:57 PM Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia legionadventureman Wanderer legionadventureman Wanderer Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia The dog looked at the cat with disdain His canine feelings were plain Because the cat forgot That you never squat While the plumber was fixing the drain NEXT: When will the malt shop open?

Re: Limericks #386207 03/31/06 01:01 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston When will the malt shop open? pretty soon is what I'm hopin' I'm having tics for my chocolate fix and not having any luck copin' NEXT: The old spinster went to the beach Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #386208 03/31/06 03:24 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 The old spinster went to the beach Wearing a muu-muu colored pale peach The sand was too hot So she lay on her cot Hoping the sun would her hair bleach. NEXT: While at the beach, she went for a swim

Re: Limericks #386209 04/02/06 02:56 AM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer While at the beach, she went for a swim Hoping she could forget about him Then she lay in the sand But felt too un-manned She took out her cell phone and called on a whim. NEXT: The waves were wild and foaming that day Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #386210 04/03/06 12:23 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston The waves were wild and foaming that day Bad for swimming is what they say with a cheery grin off she went in And got pulled out of San Francisco bay. NEXT: They gave her a burial at sea Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #386211 04/03/06 12:27 PM Joined: Oct 2004 Posts: 3,611 Washington DC Lad Boy Legionnaire! Lad Boy Legionnaire! Joined: Oct 2004 Posts: 3,611 Washington DC They gave her a burial at sea At least that's what they told me They stood in a hush Then heard the big flush as she went out like a dead guppy. NEXT: I'm re-reading my funeral plan.

Re: Limericks #386212 04/03/06 02:18 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 I'm re-reading my funeral plan It's going to take place in Milan Men with white gloves Will release doves To guide my soul to the next age of man. NEXT: When I arrive at the pearly gates

Re: Limericks #386213 04/03/06 05:31 PM Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia legionadventureman Wanderer legionadventureman Wanderer Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia When I arrive at the pearly gates I hope to be reunited with my mates We will hold a big party So We drink hearty and forget about bringing dates NEXT: Just wait till equal opportunity finds out!

Re: Limericks #386214 04/03/06 07:22 PM Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 29,461 Hudson Valley Kent Shakespeare Time Trapper Kent Shakespeare Time Trapper Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 29,461 Hudson Valley Just wait til equal opportunity finds out! I'm certain they'll cause a big shout! But once they get tarty We'll invite them to party And I'll serve up some premium stout NEXT: St. Peter stopped by for a pint The childhood friend Exnihil never had.

Re: Limericks #386215 04/03/06 11:36 PM Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia legionadventureman Wanderer legionadventureman Wanderer Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 5,452 Adelaide, Australia St. Peter stopped by for a pint Hoping to save a mint (sorry...couldnt rhyme) He took up a collection Which was, by reflection Enough to send everyone skint NEXT: It's only a website, by gosh

Re: Limericks #386216 04/04/06 03:08 AM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer It's only a website, by gosh But I like to come here and nosh On cookies that crunch And yak with a bunch Of lunatics, senior and frosh. NEXT: It's "Go To Work If You Love It Day" Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #386217 04/05/06 09:20 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston It's "Go To Work If You Love It Day" The work's boring, but I like the pay. My co-workers are rude The boss is stewed In my cubicle is where I'll stay. NEXT: I'm really not pessimistic at all Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #386218 04/08/06 02:19 PM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,863 Café Cramer I'm really not pessimistic at all Which could be because of the quite nasty fall I had on my head Now I'm feeling no dread And I'm running my credit cards up at the mall. NEXT: Chocolate is better than ice cream, he said Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #386219 04/11/06 06:00 PM Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 5,074 Canada Tamper Lad Wanderer Tamper Lad Wanderer Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 5,074 Canada Chocolate is better than ice cream, he said. There's no way to choose cold stuff instead. When after a date With your lovely mate You're whispering sweet nothings in bed. Next: There once was a guy from west Texas.

Re: Limericks #386220 04/12/06 10:07 AM Joined: May 2004 Posts: 3,446 Denver, CO CJ Taylor Legionnaire! CJ Taylor Legionnaire! Joined: May 2004 Posts: 3,446 Denver, CO There once was a guy from west Texas, With a warped idea of justice. He started a war, His people, ignored. And now we all boo his ass. Next: Started with friends out on the town Just spouting off.

Re: Limericks #386221 04/12/06 11:16 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Started with friends out on the town But saw something that just got me down At a trendy dive did arrive My ex on the arm of some clown. NEXT: Violet did a dance of spring Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!