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Re: Limericks #385347 08/03/05 05:52 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq OP strange but not a stranger OP Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Out of the frying pan, into the fire Is what we say when things are dire Before we proceed What we need Is water to make the flames expire. NEXT: I listened to the words of the sage Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #385348 08/03/05 11:38 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 I listened to the words of the sage He told me to write on every page All the good things That my life brings And in this way, my blessings gauge. NEXT: Aren't we just the cleverest sort

Re: Limericks #385349 08/04/05 08:49 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq OP strange but not a stranger OP Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Aren't we just the cleverest sort Our punning we will not abort But if a thief took our leaf Then we'd see him in court. NEXT: A kiss from a maiden I did steal Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #385350 08/04/05 05:32 PM Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 5,074 Canada Tamper Lad Wanderer Tamper Lad Wanderer Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 5,074 Canada A kiss from a maiden I did steal. This was after the delightful meal. My mind is dirty. She was awful purty. But I'll not admit I copped a feel. NEXT: There once was a boy from Toronto.

Re: Limericks #385351 08/04/05 05:45 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 6,971 Westerly Rhode Island Abin Quank Wanderer Abin Quank Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 6,971 Westerly Rhode Island There once was a boy from Toronto Whose image we could barely hold onto He opened a bar Invited all from near and far and got Vee to dress up like Tonto NEXT: If wishes were fishes... Just an Old, Broke-Down, Drunk, Bum!! With a Power Ring...

Re: Limericks #385352 08/04/05 06:22 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 I wishes were fishes And I were Sid Vicious I'd sing punk With my dog Dunc And ne'er be repititious NEXT: Oh where oh where can my Abin Quank be

Re: Limericks #385353 08/04/05 06:35 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 6,971 Westerly Rhode Island Abin Quank Wanderer Abin Quank Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 6,971 Westerly Rhode Island Oh where oh where can my Abin Quank be (I think he went out to sea) Cobie gave him a ring (It's attached to his thing) It helps him to annoy thee NEXT: Heigh-Ho, Heigh-Ho, it's off to work we go Just an Old, Broke-Down, Drunk, Bum!! With a Power Ring...

Re: Limericks #385354 08/05/05 01:16 AM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Heigh-ho, Heigh-ho, it's off to work we go Although it's beastly hot and wicked winds do blow A dromedary Can not tarry In caravans, you're just another working joe. NEXT: I'm not that kind of girl, she cried Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #385355 08/05/05 06:51 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq OP strange but not a stranger OP Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston I'm not that kind of girl, she cried Neither am I, he lied She then said "OK" And went all the way Now her dad is fit to be tied. NEXT: Marriage is a wonderful thing Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #385356 08/05/05 08:45 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Marriage is a wonderful thing Happiness and joy it will bring To Bill and Phil And Lil and Jill Despite ranting of the right wing. NEXT I want to be a millionaire

Re: Limericks #385357 08/05/05 12:21 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq OP strange but not a stranger OP Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston I want to be a millionaire And rest about on my derriere My hope is the lottery or maybe robbery Of actually being one, I despair. NEXT: A little old lady from Pasadena Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #385358 08/05/05 12:32 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 A litte old lady from Pasadena Named her boobs Yolanda and Tina They filled her shirt She was such a flirt Oh, sorry Grans, I didn't mean to demean ya. NEXT: When pigs dress up to go out

Re: Limericks #385359 08/07/05 01:31 PM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer When pigs dress up to go out They put red lipstick on the snout. They carry silk purses, Are chauffered in hearses And dance until dawn, I've no doubt. NEXT: There once was a fellow who liked onion curry Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #385360 08/07/05 02:11 PM Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 22,669 The Pyngwyn Colonies Rockhopper Lad Fabulous and Sparkly! Rockhopper Lad Fabulous and Sparkly! Joined: Aug 2005 Posts: 22,669 The Pyngwyn Colonies There once was a fellow who liked onion curry Who always ate it in very great hurry But once ate too fast So there was a blast And there was nothing left of him to bury. Next: A woman who liked to knit sweaters... The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."

Re: Limericks #385361 08/07/05 02:59 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 A woman who liked to knit sweaters For athletes she would sew on letters But "I", "O" and "U" In red or navy blue Were the ones she reserved for debtors. NEXT She broke her heel on the runway

Re: Limericks #385362 08/08/05 09:56 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq OP strange but not a stranger OP Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston She broke her heel on the runway He was the ankle doctor she saw on Monday One thing lead to another It met the approval of his mother And they were wed the following Sunday NEXT: I don't know how to love him Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #385363 08/10/05 01:22 AM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer I don't know how to love him He took me to a movie on a whim A Bronson flick He thought me thick And left me with the clams to swim. NEXT: We sent camping, got chased by a bear Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #385364 08/10/05 06:08 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 We went camping, got chased by a bear When we stumbled too close to her lair She rose up and roared She was huge my lord But was only protecting her cubs in there. NEXT I've been in a foreign land too long

Re: Limericks #385365 08/10/05 06:29 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq OP strange but not a stranger OP Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston I've been in a foreign land too long And I miss my mother's song but here I stay can't get away since they found my stash and bong. NEXT: Mr. Morton was lonely, Mr. Morton was Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #385366 08/11/05 02:12 AM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Mr. Morton was lonely, Mr. Morton was wondering what to do, when he got a buzz from a friend in the end they talked all night, just because. NEXT: Dining out in Tokyo is really very pricey Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #385367 08/11/05 07:01 AM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Dining out in Tokyo is really very pricey Especially if you have the fugu, it can be quite dicey For a slip of chef's knife Can put an end to your life If the poison sac is not removed quite precisely. NEXT I ate foie gras in gay Paris (pronounce "Paree")

Re: Limericks #385368 08/11/05 12:06 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston Quislet, Esq OP strange but not a stranger OP Quislet, Esq strange but not a stranger Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 57,030 Boston I ate foie gras in gay Paree I stayed in a villa on Capri There was a hassle In a German castle And that was my European spree NEXT: On a moonlit night did I dance Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!

Re: Limericks #385369 08/11/05 01:12 PM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer On a moonlit night did I dance With Senor Widebottom, in his oversized pants We did the waltz But slipped on some schmaltz Then on roulette took a chance. NEXT: A dog walked into a bar on Naltor Holy Cats of Egypt!

Re: Limericks #385370 08/11/05 04:19 PM Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Semi Transparent Fellow Wanderer Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 7,723 A dog walked into a bar on Naltor And said to the waitress I like your halter I knew you'd say that Now go chase a cat Said the dream lass, and who can fault her? NEXT: I took a chance and spun the wheel

Re: Limericks #385371 08/12/05 07:56 AM Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer Fat Cramer Time Trapper Fat Cramer Time Trapper Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 16,860 Café Cramer I took a chance and spun the wheel Of life, - and groaned. I made a deal Like Dr. Faust And now I joust With devils, though my fate they seal. NEXT: Inside a jacket from a jumble sale Holy Cats of Egypt!