Legion World Forums LEGION COMPANION Spaceopoly Rock, Paper, Scissors, Escalation

In order to reduce lower back problems, Power Girl is forced to have breast reduction surgery and as a result her pin-up status suffers. To compensate DC decides to give Green Arrows torso it's own poster.

The Green Arrow torso poster becomes so popular that DC begins overmarketing Green Arrow paraphernalia, which proves to be less popular than they anticipated, resulting in bankruptcy.

Carl Icahn buys DC's assets in a bankruptcy settlement and merges the company with the vestiges of Eastern Airlines. The resulting financial powerhouse, in a highly leveraged transaction, takes over the world.

Carl Icahn discovers that money and power do not bring happiness and goes on a spiritual quest.

Carl Icahn's spiritual quest was just a cover for his real estate quest; he buys several Buddhist Temples and most of the Vatican City.

Real estate values plummit when the aliens predicted by the Church of the Sub-Genius arrive and transport every person on Earth to his/her own private pleasure planet.

The taxes on private pleasure planets prove too much for most folks budgets. Everybody moves back to earth where they all settle in the Boston area in order to take advantage of the nifty transportation system.

The high cost of living in Metropolitan Boston precipitates a mass migration to the Southern and Western United States.

The Publishers Clearinghouse makes everyone a winner and thus able to live in whatever area of the world they want to.

Publishers' Clearinghouse is declared a terrorist organization and its officers, employees and winners are all shipped off to Gitmo without trial or evidence.

Disney buys the Guantanamo navel base and converts it into a theme park. Mickey means business.

Disney Gitmo is such a success that the economy of Cuba becomes the best in the world. The Communist government of Cuba buys controlling interest in Disney stock and make it a socialist company.

A revolution overthrows Castro's government.

Video of the revolutionaries gunning down Donald Duck is posted on youtube, and they are immediately invaded by the Coalition Of Nations Whose Children Will Not Stop Crying, Dammit, What Is Wrong With You.

The Coalition Of Nations Whose Children Will Not Stop Crying, Dammit, What Is Wrong With You succeeds, but 20-30 years later those children sue the Coalition Of Nations Whose Children Will Not Stop Crying, Dammit, What Is Wrong With You for trauma, pain and sufffering, after proof surfaces that the Coalition Of Nations Whose Children Will Not Stop Crying, Dammit, What Is Wrong With You fabricated the videos in the first place.

The suit against the Coalition Of Nations Whose Children Will Not Stop Crying, Dammit, What Is Wrong With You is dismissed due to expiration of the statute of limitations.

The Universal Coalition of Trial Lawyers (in order to protect the rights of the oppressed, and the right of Trial Lawyers to make large contingency fees on more accessible class-action lawsuits) successfully lobbies for the repeal of Statute of Limitations allowing them to sue the Roman Invasion of Gaul.

Taking their namesake's advice, the Royal Shakespeare Company kills all the lawyers.

All the lawyers come back to life when both Heaven and Hell reject them. The lawyers then sue the Royal Shakespeare Company on the tort action of battery.

Having been declared legally dead, the resurrected lawyers lack standing in court to pursue their case, setting back the cause for Reanimated Rights for decades.

In what will ultimately be known as the high point of the Countdown to Crisis, Star Boy farts opening a rift to earth 41 -- the parallel world for re-animated zombie attorneys. Brian K Vaughn writes a best-selling limited series about their adventures, starting with their battery suit.

The limited series proves so popular that it is decided to turn it into a movie, adapted by the same crew who gave us the Halle Berry Catwoman.

Some truly inspired casting, bad direction, and indy cred turn the movie flop into a classic cult camp hit.

In a post-election funk, Vice-emporer Dick Cheney joins the cult. All records of its existence immediately disappear; Scooter Libby stays in jail.

Dick's cult is co-opted by the Church of Scientology; Scooter Libby stays in jail but is forced to change his nickname from Scooter to Death Skull in order to survive.