Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board The Evil Genius Supper Club - now Restored!

The Evil Genius Supper Club created by Abin Quank in his 'Bits OneVision The Rising Darkness*

Located on the waterfront in the duty-free zone of Metropolis Galactic Freight Terminal, the EGSC is a short walk and a world away from the other establishments on Legion World. Here the greatest minds of the galaxy gather to entertain each other with their ideas.

Welcome to the Evil Genius Supper Club, I am the proprietor of this establishment and your host for this evening. You will usually find me behind the bar or sitting at the head table with the lovely Caliente entertaining the guests of honour for the evening. As the holiday season is a slow time for us, tonight I have a moment to show you around. Please join me in the gaming lounge to shoot some craps.

Ah I see Cali is on a roll at the craps table. On most nights she’s the hostess here at the EGSC. I really don’t know why I gave her a job that requires me to spend so much time with her. I could show you evidence of the trauma she’s inflicted on my ribs with her elbows. We had a stormy fling some time ago. She always seems to have her way with me. I am so over her. Although she does look lovely standing over there, and the memory of melting in her warm embrace haunts me still. Err excuse me for rambling, let’s continue.

Many guests conduct business in the main hall. While our staff is extremely discrete concerning guests’ private affairs, I urge caution when making deals that require strict confidence. The controversy over the cabal against the Khundish opposition leader is something I’d rather forget. So remember, you never know who might be listening. I know the Office of Security and several foreign powers regularly dispatch their lackeys to this establishment. In this area are the private dining/meeting rooms which members can book to conduct business absolute discretion. These rooms are certified free of listening devices and sentient eavesdroppers. Please see the concierge for details and availability.

The club also serves as a sales office for Evil Genius Inc. They cater to the technological needs of “freedom fighters” and “enlightened despots” galaxy wide. Due to recent changes in LW regulation, EGI is unable to process payments from third parties. Intelligence services funding clandestine wars must now make alternate payment arrangements. Please see your representative for details.

I would show you the kitchen area but the Chef does not appreciate people interrupting his work. I will say that the food here is most excellent. Our current menu includes such delicacies as Space Whale Tartare and Smoked Fillet of Lightning Beast. We endeavour to cater to all our guests, if you have special dietary requirements please contact the Chef in advance. However, I must inform you that the serving of sentient species is not permitted on Legion World.

From time to time we have special theme evenings and events here at the club. Please join us as we ring in the New Year in a few days. The theme will be New Year’s in Old Shanghai. It promises to be most interesting, though due to local regulations there will be no opium available at this event. I will be attired in a golden silk robe embroidered with the imperial dragon of course. And wait till you see the outfit Caliente is going to wear, it's smoking hot. That reminds me, she needs to try it on for fit. If you would excuse me I should attend to that, please feel free to use the facilities.

Everything sounds about right... except that part where you, Tamper dahling, will be attending my fittings. I'm thinking not so much there. We all know about your Asian clothing fetish.

...well, now they all know, anyway.

Let's see here, I thought this place up, but my Editor, Eddie Tor, gave it to Tamper, Free Gratis Or was that Gratis Fee?

Oh well, I wonder if I can at least get a free meal out of it...

Sometimes I wonder who runs this place, Caliente. Still I'm sure you'll be stunning on New Year's.

The House of Q is always welcome here, in fact the licensing deal provides the HoQ perpetual use of the Space Ranger Room located in the conference centre.

Of course I will. Hello, have you seen me? Psh. I mean, I'm no Crujectra but I do okay.

And, Mr. Quank, I believe we could work out some sort of free meal as a show of gratitude. (Even though Tamper has none.)

Besides, it's the drinks we kill you with, not the food. So, what'll it be...?

It's all in knowing the right designers. Oh... and being rich helps alot

Oo! Oo! My Psyche-self has a tendency to switch sides at a blink of an eye, so if there is any juicy goss to spill....

Have you seen Cali's shoe closet? I have a feeling that this venture serves her financial needs much more than mine.

So you don't have a thing for Manolo Blahniks?

Hahaha, no, he doesn't. And I still can't afford them. Hmm... maybe I should ask for a raise...

And, duly noted Cru. Must remember to marry for money, not that pesky love thang. Ohhh yes. Then all the shows will be miiiiiine!!!!!!!

Er, I mean... Did you want anything LAM or Cru? The food's not half bad...

Well, just be careful of what gets slipped into your Purple Hooter, Cali...

I'm not evil
I'm not a monkey
I'm not a nijar
I'm not clever
I'm not Janet Street Porter
I'm not a Supergirl Robot
I'm not that skin on soup
I'm not Belgium
and I can't spell
What am I?

Question: What the frag is a nijar?

As if I would accept drinks from anybody other than Semi and, of course, Cobie. Now that he's a chick, I mean...

Oh come on - you can trust me....Do have a drink on me, my dear...

Regrettably club staffers including Caliente Lady of the House though she may be, cannot accept drinks or gratuities of any kind from guests. These are included in the excessive service charges appearing on your invoices.


As for shoes, no worries. Cali's position includes a generous wardrobe allowance. I need her to look good for me... er my guests rather.

Nice place here, TL. Wasn't Caliente formerly known as the infamous Dragon Lady? I'd be real nice to her if I were you - she might just decide that you're expendable.

I'll drop by New Year's Eve - with my fluffy white cat, one of the more traditional Evil Genius accessories.

Ah Tamper Lad, good to see you again after that unfortunate incident at the Chinese Delegates ball last spring. I mean although I asked you to be friendly, I really thought slapping the CEO’s wife on the tush like that was a wee bit over the top. Still we managed to get away with only a few bullet holes in the cape, and I’m pleased to see you are not still walking with a limp.

Now, I need to undertake some “delicate” diplomacy can you arrange for a private room, fine wine and food and let me know when my guests arrive.

Tamper Lad, you won't mind if I book one of your secret meeting rooms for the Khundish Ambassador's daughter and myself, do you? She seems more taken with me now that I'm a female, and I need those Khundish state secrets before the start of the weekend.

I'm glad we've worked out some sort of shaky understanding...

Sad, sad truth. But the wardrobe allowance is the best thing ever. Ever, I say! What do you mean I'm a shopaholic...? <.< >.>

Shhh. Don't tell him such things. I'm distracting his lower brain over here... I don't want the upper one catching on.

Tamper has an UPPER brain? Who Knew?

What, What WHAT.

My interest in Caliente is purely platonic. A youngster all alone here on LW. She could easily fall in with the wrong crowd. Now she has a job to keep her off the mean streets.

Mmmm-Hmmm Okay, I mean who am I to argue with a self proclaimed "Evil Genius?"

Psh. I'm 19 and very self-aware Tamper Lad. I think I could survive those 'mean streets' juuuuust fine. :rolleyes:

*coughs* Not that I'm not thankful for my job! I am, I am. (Don't fire me. I'm too cute to be unemployed...)

I'm the EGSC's first patron of 2006 and you're not!