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{wanders in looking a little lost and, strangely, over-dressed}
Oh! This is a little...much. Oh well, might as well try to, what do they say, "mingle"?
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Deputy
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Ahhh... there you are... <chug> like I said earlier... There are a few questions I need to ask you... <chug>
Sorry, would you like a drink?
Do you have a name?
Are you cold?
Can I get you anything else?
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Nobody said this was official business...)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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{timidly sits across from him}
{looks at the beverage offered in a confused manner}
Er...no thanks. It smells kind of... bad. May I try some of those edibles you are dining on? And no, I am not uncomfortable...this is how my people always dress.
As for my name, where I come from, we don't have names. We just communicate telepathically. It's...complicated. If you would like, you can call me "Hot Chick". I'm not sure what those words mean, but several males on this world have referred to me by that.
May I ask who you are?
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Joined: Sep 2003
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My Name Is Bartholomew Quank but most people call me Space Ranger. I'm the Legion World Security Chief.
But right now I'm off duty and when I'm off duty my friends call me Bart.
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(maybe later you can call me Big Daddy...)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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Oh my! {her breasts twitch apparently involuntarily} Your thoughts are a bit...forward. What exactly is a "Big Daddy"?
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What!... Mmmm... You did say you were telepathic didn't you?
I guess I'll have to watch what I think around you.
Big Daddy is a... Bedroom Name... for somone who is... larger... than you might have expected...
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Censored)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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Oh. You don't have to be so cautious. Sexuality is valued very highly where I come from. It is the ultimate means of expression in my culture. It is customary, for example, to press each other's bare breasts against each other as a greeting.
I am {looks around} slightly surprised. I was told that your...society...was much more prudish than mine. This gathering would seem to refute that assessment.
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This group doesn't repesent the supposed societal norms of the UP. But Legion World and the LMBP are... different.
And while I would never allow my niece to attend one of these parties until she's older... much older... there comes a time when everybody needs to relax and have a good time.
(Pulls off his tunic)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Formal Greeting Time, Yee Haw!)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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{removes her top, presses her chest against his}
Oh! {grasps tighter, he feels her breasts twitch} You have known great pain in your life...I am so sorry. {disengages, replaces her top}
Do you...wish to talk about her?
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Joined: Sep 2003
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It won't bring her back...
(Puts his tunic back on and hauls the second case of Michelob up onto the table...)
Nothing will...
(Downs a foot long Chili/Cheese Brat and chases it with 2 beers)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Sometimes the pain reminds me that I'm alive...)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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I am sorry. I failed to mention that my breats are the source of my telepathy. The closer the contact with them, the deeper the telepathic connection.
{reaches for his hand and grasps it}
I hope I have not offended you, Bartholomew.
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Joined: Sep 2003
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No offense... It's just... We both died... but that guy over there... <Points at Cobalt who is half buried under a writhing pile of nekkid women> Played a wild hunch and it paid off...
I was saved... Revived... Brought back from the dead... Whatever.
There was nobody to do that for her... Not that there wasn't anybody willing to do it... Cobalt, Vee, Abin, Semi, hell even Icy or Lardy and a hundred other LMBPers would march into hell and spit in the devils eye if there was any chance of bringing her back, and they'd be led by three teenage girls...
(Downs another beer)
But there isn't any chance...
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(So I'm gonna get very drunk tonite and pray that EDE never feels the way I do)
Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(Just as soon as the Check Clears!)
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{wipes a tear from her eye}
Sometimes, life is unfair, Bartholomew.
{rises, sits close to him as he drinks and rests her head on his shoulder}
{thinks} I wonder if this could be the one I was sent back in time to marry?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,256
Time Trapper
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<witnessing the whole scene from afar> Whoa! Way to go, Bart! He just might get laid tonight! 
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141
Not much between despair and ecstacy
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Not much between despair and ecstacy
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141 |
Hey, I thought this party was about Eryk, not Bart getting laid!
Where's the guest of honor?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,256
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
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Posts: 29,256 |
He's a no-show, so far. He needs to get his nelly-hat ass over here!
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141
Not much between despair and ecstacy
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Not much between despair and ecstacy
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141 |
In that case, I'll just help myself to some beer and pizza.
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675
space mutineer & purveyor of quality sammitches
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space mutineer & purveyor of quality sammitches
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675 |
Note to self: Never again base an at-home drinking game on the number of times one sees the words "breasts" in an LMB thread.
hee hee hee (HIC!)
<span style="font-size: 20px;">PINK TELLUSES!! Lookit' 'em flyyyyyy!!</span>
<span style="font-size: 18px;">[thud]</span>
Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on DeviantArt! Drop by and tell me that I sent you. *updated often!*
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,256
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
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Posts: 29,256 |
Hey! Somebody get Clee home safely, post haste!
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
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Posts: 29,461 |
Shoor. I'lllll drive herr. Wish yeller line shoood I keep right off?
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634
Bold Flavors
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Bold Flavors
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634 |
No need to worry about people getting home safely! Since my return to the Security Office, I've hired several Venturian Walking Money as low-level security officers, and they specialize in getting people home safely. The best part? You never have to pay for space-cab fare.
<finds bottle of some blue liquid>
Gross! Dominator liquor! Ah, what the hell...
<guzzles it, skin turns blue momentarily>
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,256
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
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Posts: 29,256 |
<wakes>
uhhh...what a party. Don't think Eryk ever showed up...
<looks around at unconscious guests>
Oh my god!
<sees Gladys the Sentient Disco Ball entwined in naked, unconscious postcoital bliss with another very familiar partygoer>
<The partygoer awakes, fails to see Lardy and slips out>
Gladys has slept with--! Lord, should I keep this a secret?!?!?
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,256
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
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Posts: 29,256 |
<having consumed a special mushroom obtained from Doctor Mayavale, Lardy lies in his bed dreaming a peculia dream...> Yes! Mayavale's mushroom...it unlocks my past lives! So many..... <Lardy sees himself battling the JSMB...then ruthlessly hunting Native Americans...manning the guillotine during the French Revolution...and on and on...> Gods! Was I evil in every one of my past lives? <His sleeping self sheds hot tears and coils into the fetal position> No...no. I must go further...<life after life flashes by him, but he wills himself not to look> Must find the life I'm looking for...the first one...the one where I knew Ghost Girl...and...and Zardi...<finally, after what seemed billions and billions of lives, Lardy stops> <his sleeping body shakes as if he'd had a dream about falling, but he stays awake> <a rush of happiness falls over him> My...first life? I...I am with a woman, and I am very happy. We...we're in love! And I...I am GOOD!<warm tears of joy this time> I love her so much! Is...is this Ghost Girl in her former life?<he's not positive of the answer, but it feels right, at least> This man...he's like...he's like my brother. I...I'm not sure if it's my actual brother or a bond that FEELS like brotherhood. I don't know who it is...he seems familiar...<his thoughts turn to Cobalt and their own brotherly relationship> No, I don't think it's him. Eryk? No, that doesn't feel exactly right either...<recalls his altercation from the previous day> Zardi? Is this man Zardi?<before he can contemplate and focus his perception of the man, the scene changes> <his love lies...unconscious? dead? And the man stands over her, possibly having put her in this state> <the two struggle until the other mutters a curse, and Lardy can physically feel his soul darkening> <suddenly, the other lives fast-forward thru time and Lardy can feel his soul getting darker and darker thru each one until suddenly....> <...he wakes> <span style="font-size: 25px;">NOOOOOOO!!!!!</span> <eyes open wide, Lardy finds himself drenched in sweat and breathing hard as if he'd just completed a marathon run> *huff* Oh my gods---was that how it all really happened...or was it a really vivid and detailed hallucination? *huff* <Lardy rubs his temples and contemplates it all>
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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<A gnome, peers intently from a crack in the stone wall. In her hand is a small fragment of mushroom snatched from the floor while Lardy was hallucinating/dreaming/whatever.>
The Master will be very interested in this...
Soon, Legion World, Soon your time will end.
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Time Trapper
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<recovering>
Unh. I don't think that was all an hallucination. Some details may have been off, but I'm positive that was a life I've lived, and it's relevant somehow to what's goin' on. I've a feeling I know what I need to do...
...but first, I need to talk to Rocky.
<'ports to the Rookery>
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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