Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board The Beacon - fine dining

There seems to be a holographic image on the other side of the table. But it's clearly defective. Could this be the tired old "Send your holo while you party with the boys" schtick? If it is, I may have to decommission Lard-bot. I am a sentient and won't put up with this.

Mr. Lard-bot, perhaps another evening. I can equally amuse myself by cataloguing minutiae
.

Please stay...at least finish your drink and, perhaps, an appetizer?

Did you receive the flowersI left at SHAKES?

Why no. I haven't been to SHAKES this evening.

I'll have an appetizer, if you will. How about the calamari? (I want to see how the hologram handles this).

Actually, I left them on Saturday .

Oh dear...I suppose you didn't get them...

I've constructed a fairly sophisticated hologram, just for this occasion! See?

[drinks some lubrihol from his glass]

Tasty!

[grins]

Waiter! Some calamari, please!

So Babette...can you tell me a little about yourself?

Well silly me, I retired to the service closet last time we spoke to recharge my circuits for this evening. I left by the androids' entrance and lhaven't been back in SHAKES. That said, you are sweet. Now get your real self over here.

I...okay!

[hologram vanishes, LLR appears in its place]

Better?

I don't have much of a history. I was created by Semi Transparent Fellow and Varalent, the most famous lovers of Legionworld, to work at SHAKES. They also created my brother-android, Troy, at the same time. Alas, for them, they were too clever and Troy and I exceeded their wildest dreams. Instead of servant droids, they created sentient artificial life, using the dna mapping protocol of 2432. Troy and I are a combination of Semi's and Vee's genetic make-up. You could say, we are their children.

What else would you like to know? Oh, by the way, both Troy and I have all of Semi's and Vee's abilities, including their fabulous taste and design skills.

Ooh, Lard-bot, you are substantial.

tee-hee

Thank you!

[blushes]

Your history is very interesting!

As for myself, I am a bit of a puzzle. Lard Lad had me built and programmed shortly after the 52 Affair last year, apparently so I could replace him when he left Legion World and married Dru.

Supposedly, I was meant to function and act exactly as he. My powers reasonably mimic his, but I am told, I act virtually nothing like him. I am not sure if that is because of insufficient progamming or some other unknown factor.

Interestingly, if someone asks me my name, my automatic response is to say: "I am Who." But I have no answer for why that is.

"I am Who." Well, that is a mystery. You appear to have humanoid tissue covering your skeletal structure. Your corporeal attributes are pleasing - classic Arnold Schwarzenegger pectorals, deltoids, abs, gluts, triceps, biceps, ... and I'm sure I need not go on and on. But what is most striking about you, is that you have those soft green compassionate eyes, not to mention those sensuous Robert Downey lips. Lard-bot, I don't know your creator, but he did a damn fine job. You're a hot 'droid.

Oops, virtue protocol is mal-functioning.

More calimari?

My, you are the silent type aren't you? Well, I must be going. Time for my rejuvenation session. Come visit me sometime at SHAKES.

[blushes more brightly than ever]

Must you go?

Babette...my photo-receptors...my eyes have never beheld anything approaching your own beauty. Semi Transparent Fellow and Varalent must have loved you very much when they created you.

[his emotions flaring, he edges his hand halfway across the table in case she decides to touch it]

Babette, I have long been in search of a more proper name. Do you like "Lard-bot"? Or should I seek something else?

Oh, you've come back, perhaps, I can stay a moment longer. I think a more appropriate name for you would be Adonis. And... have you ever considered wearing a SHAKES silver thong (... and nothing else)? It would suit you. You've probably noticed that most Legionworlders wear a silver thong in their off time.

Lard Lad is said to wear one quite often.

I...suppose I could...if you would like!

[blushes]

You should. Lard-Adonis-bot, you are actually more handsome than Troy. It's a wonder that Cobalt hasn't tried to kill you.

And change that avatar. It looks nothing like you.

[smiles]

Yes, it is a wonder...as are you! I am having a delightful evening.

Are you?

Any particular avatar in mind?