Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board The untamed streets of Legion World

(That bastard won't get the satisfaction of knowing I probably would have done the same thing he did...yet another thing we strangely, or not so much, have in common)

Message to Cobalt Kid:

We've discovered a trap left for Hrun the Barbarian, Rockhopper Lad and the Royal Inquisitor on their path. As per Everyday Girl's plan, we're going to disable it before they reach it.

A word of warning: this trap includes Zombie Squirrels. If you come upon any, be careful. They don't eat brains... and I wouldn't want to see you hurt.

Hopefully we'll find the trio well. I miss you. Be safe.

<beneath the rubble where Lard Lad's cocoon had burst, something stirs...>

*groan* How'd I get under all this rubble?

<blasts rubble away>

Hey...I'm okay! I got the zombie virus out! Guess the power it took overloaded the Lard Force cocoon...

<sees a body nearby, brains eaten>

Damn...poor bastard...

<it twitches and Lardy fries it>

Man, I wonder how long I was out? I gotta go find Cali!

pop

Lolita - be safe yourself. I mean it. And good luck. I know you're in good hands, and even more--I know they are.

- Cobie

<Flexes the Magnetic Fields holding the iron asteroid in geosynchronous orbit over Legion World and fires it into the sun...>

Bye-Bye Zombie Lardy, We Shan't Miss You.

*** Tamper Lad rides shotgun on a hover jeep while the Colonel sits in the back seat beaming waving happily to the civilians in their bombed out hovels, while throwing cans of pudding to children reaching out of the blown out windows.

The Colonel stands clearing his throat and brushing his mustache. The dignified but paunchy silver fox signals Tamper who raises the holo camera to capture the speech to come.***

Colonel Wellesley: Fellow Citizens in order to protect your lives and property, and in light of the collapse of Legion World's own security forces I have mobilized elements of Wellesley Hospitality Industries' Paramilitary Emergency Mercenaries (WHIPEM) from our Legion World cupcake plant and Wellesley Logistics' Regional Distribution Centre and instructed them to distribute relief supplies and maintain order here on the well ordered streets of Legion World. Do not be alarmed by the presence of heavily armed soldiers on the streets, we are here to help.

SREPEEJS!

<more bad luck passes through the citizens of Legion World, as split second decisions are seconds too slow and debris causes more pain>

But perhaps my favorite power of them all, but the most dangerous to use...

<uses Lucien Lad's nostalgia power>

Ah...I recall the days when Legion World was crowded with invaders, when things seemed so hopeless...

<Legion World's cityscape begins to change>

The Supergirl Armies and Zombies march on the streets, but every hour brings more and more exhuastion and hopelessness.

<rubs his temples>

Okay, gotta remember the sequence of events...Vee Reborn, the E-M pulse, the tesseract calamity, Cali dies, the zombie hordes Slim duels Cobalt to the death, the Ice City falls, battle at the Tower, Legion World's computers rebel, the Supergirl robots, the Eye chooses--no! It's all out of sequence!

<concentrates>

Okay, first the Tower. That's where I need to go!

pop

<as the Computer Tyrant assumes command of Legion World's computers, an immediate effect is felt as all systems directly connected to its mother boards begin to function erratically>

<traffic controls switch off, computers of all types go down--including those monitoring and regulating such vital systems as food replication, power generators and public transit>

<span style="font-size: 20px;">Soon, I will be able to override Legion World's atmospheric and gravitic controls!!!</span>

COLONEL!!! Something else else's happening. Look zombie reinforcements.


Colonel Wellesley: DreadNaught Tamper my Lad. The ladies don't like a man who suffers sweating from loss of nerve.

** The Colonel draws his pistol and empties the 6 chambers of the revolver at the advancing zombie horde. Tamper pulls out his laser rifle and fires. **

Colonel: Yes Lad, that's more like it. We'll make a man of you yet.

** The Colonel's elite squad recruited from the best bakers and cupcake decorators in the whole of the Colonel's business empire locked arms and advanced on the army of zombies. Each held their weapons forward forming an tight bunch of energy lances. The phalynx advanced the wall of energy cutting down masses of advancing zombie.

Tamper's alarm sounded indicating a problem. Turning to the Colonel... **

Colonel that was the Legion World Grid. The EmergencyFailSafe Daemon has detected the Computer Tyrant has taken control of the main operating kernel and has just shut down all systems on the planet to protect its core programming. LEGION WORLD IS DOWN!!!

*** The Colonel looked back at Tamper for a second. ***

Colonel Wellesley: Then we'll just have to do like we did in my day lad. With the power of our muscles and the strength of our will.

The streets are pretty croweded tonight!

<sees Cobalt>

<to self> Look what the cat dragged in...

(Bloody Liberty, here we go again...)

Tell me Lardy, where are your friends? Where are Gary Concord and the other villains on Legoin World?

Or if you walk the streets alone, where the RMB are numerous, would you care to grace us with your presence?

Perhaps you might see that I mean you, nor any other Legion Worlder, any harm?

I'm perfectly safe when I don't have my back exposed for you to stab me! The sight of you makes me physically ILL!

How about a beer together in SHAKES Lardy? Surely you remember the last time we shared a drink together? You told me the name of your newborn son.

Do you remember his name?

What the HELL are you talking about?!?!?! I don't have any children!

YOU. however, well-- <laughs>

Worse than I thought...poor Helen...poor lil' Hugh...I'll have to check on them...

So tell me Lardy, at long last. How did I do it? How did I kill you? With my magnetism? Or did I stab you? Did I get my hands dirty...?

You KNOW what you did!!! Somehow you blocked me from teleporting out of the powersphere! I heard your voice mocking me as the flesh melted off my body!

Don't insult me by denying it when you have no one here to posture for!!!!

Lardy, I will let you believe what ever you must to be at peace, so I will bother you no more.

But I have much work yet to do on Legion World, and I cannot have you standing in my way. I cannot have anyone doing so...

<walks on>

<yells after him>

I will ALWAYS be in your way, you bastard!!! Whatever you have planned, I WILL be there to stop you!!!!

[scratches head in puzzlement]

(I hope it doesn't come to that Lardy, I truly don't. Because great change is coming, and if it comes down to it, you'll have to relive those memories...)

Hail, Lard Lad! I see many abroad the streets tonight! Is that Cobalt Kid walking away?

I hope you did not have another ill-fated confrontation?

<notices Legatus Ferrous Rodentus>

Could it be...? The last time I saw the one known as STU was the Dark Stu Saga...a terrible time of my life. But I'm past that now...

Good to see you, Roy.

Yeah, that's Cobalt, and he continues to deny what he did, even to my face--the bastard!

I think maybe some of the others are starting to glimpse the truth about him...but he--and STU over there--seem to be planning a power grab.

It may be too late to stop them!

Do you dare impugn the name of the emperor, you common street-walker?