Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Café Cramer - Always Open

I need something appropriately decadent for one committed to a life (well, a month) of leisure.

<sluuuuuuuuurrrrrrppppp>

Nice! Hey, mebbe you should amp things up liquor-wise and run SHAKES outta business! Legion World's a little too nicey-nicey for my tastes on the business front! Where's that wipe-out-the competition cut-throat business savvy at, eh?

Lardy, your "Star Patron" status at SHAKES is still probationary. You don't want to mess this up. The Empress, guardian of SHAKES has a real mean streak. I shudder even thinking about it.

Lardy, there are wheels within wheels. You don't know what's going on in the back rooms. And no, you can't peek.

Something else else decadent for Shakespeare - maybe a Brown Cow, the way my grandmother made it, with ice cream added to the milk, coffee liqueur and nutmeg - and I'll add gold sprinkles on top. And some very high calorie pastries on the side.

Think of it as oligarchical politics at its best. Those of us in power like the way things run with no intentions of changing things

Now...

<rolls up sleeves>

...If this automated reply plans on asking questions, perhaps the Security Office needs to check into it...

Besides, since when do dead people get to set policy?

Since we've had wills and trusts - although I don't know that there's a Lard Lad Foundation.

Dude, this algorithm is actually programmed beyond just replying to questions and what-not. I'm a purty sophisticated version!

Hey, I'm not dead--I'm a computer program!

Don't be hatin'!


Nah, there's no Foundation. Lardy left some money to certain people special to him, but the rest was put into a fund to settle all those lawsuits brought against him...mostly palimony suits.

Lardy, regarding those palimony lawsuits. Just dare them to try and get a DNA sample from your algorithm. Deny everything.

No big whoop for me, Semi...I'm just his algorithm. But the real deal was completely incinerated, anyway, so no DNA samples forthcoming, I guess.

I'm gonna need your strongest coffee (or other caffeinated drink) to stay awake for all the studying I still have to do.

I'll set you up with a dark roast IV drip.

keep the dark roast handy for her post-Munich hangover!

<'ports in with Time-Teller Lad>

Hi, Cramer! I'll have a hot chocolate!

Whatever Tim's having is on me...what'll it be, Tim?

Actually, hot chocolate sounds really good. With little marshmallows, please?

{They sit down}

Clive that was amazing! We made it here in 1.3 seconds! Do you have all the same powers as your dad?

Pretty much, Tim. I can't do all the tricks that he can and I'm not in his league power level-wise. So far, I do the teleporting and force shields pretty well.

<bows his head>

I've had some communication with the Order of Lard Knights. Seems they want me to come to the monastery and learn the ways of the Lard Force.

<looks at Tim>

Dad was unusual among the Knights. Most of them live at the monastery all their lives, but he snuck out one day and met Lash and Shady on that fateful trip and never looked back.

I want to learn more about my power, but I also know I don't want to go there under false pretenses. I just started this life I've been blessed with--I couldn't just insulate myself from the galaxy after what I've seen.

<Cramer gives them their drinks>

Thanks, Cramer!

<sips>

On the other hand, life can be...confusing, you know?

Don't I know it!

I finally graduated from the LMB Academy a few months back and, upon graduation, Rocky sponsored me for full LMB membership. So I'm a full member now. I've wanted that--since I was a kid and your dad and the others founded the LMB eight years and five days ago! And I'm so happy I am! But--well, after years of wanting it so badly, now that I finally have it, I almost feel like there should be more to it.

{Smiles at Clive}

My powers aren't nearly as impressive as yours. I can tell what time it is anywhere in the universe; I can tell the exact age of any object and I can tell exactly how long it has been since an event has transpired. Rocky took me under his wing--so to speak and I think that's how I got in. I'm not sure what he saw, but he says I'm going to be a great hero. {Sigh} Where would we be without Rockhopper Lad?

<sighs>

Yeah, where would I be? Mr. Rockhopper is absolutely the greatest! I honestly don't know what I would have done without him. He's been so understanding! I kinda got thrown into living without a parachute, and he just stepped up, y'know?

Even with Dad back...well, I'm sure you know his memory's totally gone?

<Tim nods>

Thing is, even if Dad were all there, it would probably be awkward for us. I call him 'Dad', but the only relationship we had was that he helped program a robot and gave it the chance to be something more. When he created me, he was busy trying to start a life with Dru. It's...

<tears up a little>

...it's really strange for me. But Mr. Rockhopper has really been there.

How did you come to know him?

When I first enrolled at the LMB Academy three years, two months and ten days ago, Rocky hadn't been on Legion World for very long. As a new member of the LMB, he was asked to talk to our class. I had so many questions! He offered to stay after class to talk to me. I bent his ear--or whatever he has--for forty-seven minutes. Then he offered me a part-time job at the Rookery and it just went from there. Soon I was his scheduler when he was Deputy Leader and then I got some experience with the Security Office and then I graduated and here I am. He's been there for me through it all. And, I have to say, I know it's totally unrequited and it's not at all what my relationship to him is like, but I've always had a bit of a crush on him.

A crush?

<scratches head>

Sorry, I'm still a little new at, well, everything! What do you mean by 'crush'?

A crush? {Tim giggles} A crush is when you admire someone so much, that, even though you know they don't feel the same way about you, you feel attracted to them. I've had a lot of them. I've never had a boyfriend, though.

<thinks>

Hmmm...I wonder if what I had with Babette and Nova Girl were crushes? Babette seemed interested, but I always had the feeling I took it more seriously than her. Nova? She didn't seemed interested, either. I've a feeling they were both out of my league.

<scratches head>

I'm beginning to wonder if I have a crush on Mr. Rockhopper, as well? I...never really thought about it, but my emotions for him aren't all that different from how I felt about the other two.

I never realize it before now, but I guess what you said means you're gay...like Mr. Rockhopper, Mr. Lash and many other Legion World citizens.

How...did you know you were gay?

<quietly places a fresh pot of hot chocolate on the table>

{Tim shrugs}

I've always known. Ever since I was a kid. It's about the only thing I can't pinpoint an exact time for (winks). I always was attracted to men.

I'm glad we live in the era we do. Hundreds of years ago, they used to make life very hard for gay people on Earth, but that started changing back in the 20th Century.

Now we know it's just part of the natural diversity of life, but they say that really everyone is on a continuum somewhere. A lot of people are attracted to both men and women to varying degrees.

{Tim stops a moment to catch his breath, then notices a very distressed look on Clive's face.}

Clive, are you okay?