Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Quislet's Super Law Firm...of Space!

I don't think he understood what the money was for...

Dear Quislet,

Umm...I don't quite think anyone grasp the situation. That father has not been denied access to the child, I just find the man to be a pig, you see he cheated on his wife with me. I feel that this man is unfit to raise a child and as I stated before: I'm the Lady of the Lake, I'm a demi-goddess. I'm powerful, I run my own dimension which has a nice island. I train priestesses. I can provide the ultimate protection. And I'm rich.

And this isn't my first child, I have had 34 other mortal children that all lived out happy and prolonged lives.

Er...since I couldn't reach you, we've settled out of court in the meantime. Reboot may now need some... creative assistance in justifying LW expenditures during the inter-administration audit, but that's no longer my affair.

sorry to have bothered you.

My Dear High Priestess Viviane,

I am not the one who would make the decision regarding custody of yours & Mr. Quank's child. That would be up to the judge.

Also as Mr. Quank paid me a retainer, I cannot offer you any advice as that would be a conflict of interest.

I have offered my services as a mediator (no conflict here because the parties and not the mediator makes the decision). I am sure you and Mr. Quank can work out a joint custody arrangement that will work out best for your child.


I will say that in all custody disputes, the standard for the decision is the best interest of the child.

No bother at all.

I basically here to say that I do not fear the law, I am it.

Quislet, with the bankruptcy of the Twinkie (and Wonder Bread) company, will there be a new junk food chosen to replace the Twinkie Defense?

Funny you should mention that. It has been a topic that is being fiercely debated among the legal community. (A physical altercation erupted at the annual ABA meeting. Gun fire was almost exchanged in Texas)

There are those who feel that the new Junk Food Defense should have a similar shape to the Twinkie and therefore proposed the Taco Bell Defense. The detractors think that judges, when they hear "the Taco Bell Defense", will think of Taco Bell's slogan "Run for the Border", become confuse, imagine the case involves immigration, and deport the defendant.

The other side feels that the new name should involve a similar type of junk food and therefore proposed the Ho-Ho defense. (A sub group wanted the Devil Dog Defense, but that was nixed by Attorney General Ashcroft). The detractors here feel that using the Ho-Ho Defense will cause judges to schedule all trial for December 25th and that will interfer with the lawyers' vacations to St Bart's over the holidays.

BTW: Did you know that Twinkies were originally supposed to be banana flavored, but due to shortages during WWII, the banana flavoring was dropped.

Legal defenses - what fun!

Is that serious about the banana flavor? Yuck!

Actually, for awhile in the 1960's Twinkies WERE banana-flavored as opposed to the modern vanilla-on-vanilla.
The current Scooter Pie Speeding defense, Ring-Ding Disturbing-the-Peace counter-strategy, and Ho-Ho Solicitation appeals are all being offered as the successors to the Twinkie defense. The gunfire supposedly offered in the Texas ABA meeting was in fact found to be Butterfinger BBs.

However, the Texas incident was later revealed to have nothing to do with the Twinkie defence, and everything to do with the fact that they hadn't pulled a trigger in a few hours

*waits for people to try and hit him*

Quis, on the advice of my better half I am dropping the planned court actions against HighPriestessViviane. If the retainer I gave Bruce doesn't cover costs please bill me.

I new Abin wasn't the villain I hoped he was (will I ever get to blast someone and not get in trouble for it?)

Only if it is self-defense or the defense of others. You cannot have provoked the attack that you are defending yourself against.

Also you can't use excessive force. For example if you are the Persuader and Ma Kent (The Silver Age Elderly Ma Kent) suddenly started hitting you with her fists, it would not be self-defense to use your atomic axe on her. But Ma Kent could use a shot gun against the Persuader if he attacked her.

I hope this information is helpful for you in your quest to "blast someone".

Agh, I fondly remember when Quis handed me a warrant for the Royal Inquisitor's arrest, and I was able to use excessive force to bring him in with Fat Cramer and Blockade Boy.

Quis, do you still hold the same position in the Government as you did during Stu's term as leader? If not, should I inform the next leader that you will be available for it?

And is R.I. still rotting in the dungeon?

He was until Space Ranger broke him out a few months ago during the short lived Alt ID rebellion. Space Ranger still has to answer for that, which is why he's temporarily not a security officer.

The Inquisitor has sent letters and notes to Legion World repeatedly, although he hasn't stepped foot in the city--otherwise we'd catch him. He's continued to elude my agents out in the field right now.

However, it's been evidence has proved that he was responsible for the whole 'chip in the head' plot that SoM was worried about, and he may have been attempting to get revenge at Blockade Boy, yourself and me. Like last time, I'd like to see him try

(How can I ever forget how you weakened him with your poetry, FC?)

As an ex-co-leader I am much too busy writing my memoirs.

Please see my receptionist Bruce the Spearman for the prices of being mentioned and the prices of not being mentioned.

PS: Cobie you only used proper force. If you had used excessive force, you would have been charged with battery.

"For playing, he charges twenty-five dollars an hour."
"How much does he charge for not playing?"
"Fifty dollars an hour!"
...
"For rehearsing, he charges one hundred dollars an hour."
"How much does he charge for not rehearsing?"
"You couldn't afford it!"

Quis, I think this amount will sufficient to be mentioned in your memoirs. And this extra amount will make sure it's in a good way

As always, I'll still defer to you when I am no longer sure if I've gone to far in my role as Security Chief. Which is kind of a rarity though

Checking in on the office for post 3500.

Congratulations, Quis.

Congrats Quis! I'm sure I'll think of some weird question for you soon enough...

Congrats Quis!

YAY! for Quis!