Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Bits o' Legionnaire Business MATTER-EATER LAD: The Series!!!

PAGE 22

Splash page of the same shadowy room seen on Page 13!

The two remaining shadowy men are watching Tenzil and Taryn take off after the assassin in the "Tenzil-mobile"...

Man #3: It appears as though our assassin has failed!

Man #1: Sprock! We'll have to inform Prince Evillo!

BLURB:
Next Issue: Tenzil and Taryn get to the mystery behind the assasination attempt! The Secret Origin of Lester Spiffany! And Renkil goes to the racetrack!

WAHOOOO!!! We finished issue 1!!!!!

We kick ass!!!!

Jeepers! I just re-read the whole issue, and it's pretty good!

We kick ass, indeed!!!!

So, EDE, ya wanna get started on issue 2 or polish up issue 1 first?

I say we go ahead and get a couple more issues under the belt, then go back and spiff(any) them up!

Hmm... I wonder if we could get Dean or someone to illustrate a couple of pages for us?

I'd love to see it. There's a ton of artists here, maybe one of them will spot this and be so overwhelemed by our uncanny skills that they will volunteer to do so!

Anyhoo, the one who closes an issue opens the next one, so I'll see you on Issue 2 Page 2!

Dear writers of Matter-Eater Lad,

Just got the preview for issue 1's script. Absolutely love it, and can't wait to see more. You guys are pure genius, so please keep them coming! And more Taryn!

Sincerely,
Cobalt, your biggest fan!

MATTER-EATER LAD: THE SERIES
ISSUE #2

PAGE ONE

Panel One

Caption: The Planet Tartarus

Establishing shot of Evillo's castle amid the hellish landscapes.

Panel Two

Shot of a room in the castle. A crowd of pathetic looking super-thugs are gathered there.

Two zombie servants overlook the gathered mob of villains from a balcony up above.

Panel Three

Close in on the Zombies.

Zombie #1: So, do you think any of these ruffians will make the grade?

Zombie #2: Hard to tell. The Prince is really scraping the bottom of the barrel these days.

Panel Four

Zombie #1: Well, it's really his own fault, you know. If he wouldn't banish members of his "Elite Royal Guard" to the Realms of Darkness faster than he can fill the vacancies in it, he'd probably be able to recruit a better class of thugs.

Zombie #2: Has he ever actually had a full dozen?

Panel Five

Zombie #1: Not since I've been reanimated.

PAGE 2

full-page splash shows Evillo entering the room...

Evillo: WELCOME, peons... to the Devil's Dozen tryouts!

random super-villain: (whispering) I hate when he calls us "peons"! What is a peon, anyway...?

caption: All-Special All-Exciting second issue of Matter-Eater Lad with an Interactive PICK-IT-YOURSELF title! You may select: (A) Who Wants to be a Super-Villain? (B) The Secret Origin of Lester Spiffany AKA Shirley You Jest! (C) Tenzil & Taryn Get Nekkid! (but not with each other!) (D) This is the Biggest Pile of (fill in the blank yourself!) I've ever read!!

PAGE 3

Panel One

Tenz's Dad, Renkil, and Lester are in a bar. Cameras follow them around. A not-so-attractive but very busty waitress waits on them.

Waitress: Can I take your order?

Tenz's Dad: Well, you seem like quite the dish!

Panel Two

Waitress: Sorry, I'm not on the menu.

Tenz's Dad: Alright, then, for me and my boy Renkil here, how about a silverale and gasoline? And get the nancy boy whatever he wants, as well.

Lester: Just a straight silverale, please.

Panel Three

Dad: Hmm... and send some drinks over to those cute little fillies at that table, will you? And if you could slip in the fact that we're on TV...

Waitress: Sure thing...

Panel Four

Lester: Uh, Mr. Kem... do I need to remind you that you have a wife at home? And that you're being filmed?

Renkil: Can I have a cigarette?

Tenz's Dad: Sure, son. (Hands Renkil a cigarette). Oh, Myrta doesn't care. She's too busy watching the Home Health Care Channel to even bother watching our show!

Panel Five

As the waitress takes the order of the girls at the other table, they exchange flirtacious looks with Tenz's dad. Meanwhile, Renkil eats the cigarette.

PAGE 4

Panel 1

Lester has glazed expression, is obviously bored out of his mind.

Lester: (thought balloon) Popping Hotties! How the hell did I-- heir to Earth's most ridiculously lavish jewelry slash bling-bling empire-- end up in this bar on Bismoll with these less than attractive men? Sounds like a good time for a flashback...

Panel 2

Lester caption: I was arriving home late from doing my charity work. (scene shows him stumbling into the mansion all drunken-like)

Panel 3

Lester caption: I was starved but didn't want to disturb anyone, so I attempted to fix myself some dinner. (scene shows Lester's drugged-up rampage through the kitchen, turning dials and pressing buttons and stuff)

Panel 4

Lester caption: My loyal staff must have heard me and came to my aid. (scene shows Lester screaming his head off in the servant's quarters)

Panel 5

Lester caption: And then... *choke!* Poor poor Chef C'nnonf'dder! And my loyal butler Splatters! And dear, dear Shirley... (scene shows Lester passed out in hallway when kitchen explodes)

PAGE 5

Panel 1

Lester caption: I spent days miserable because of what had happened to my loyal servants... (scene shows Lester out partying with his friends)

Panel 2

Lester caption: My dear father realized my misery, and suggested I take a vacation... (scene shows Pop Spiffany yelling at Lester)

Panel 3

Lester caption: After careful consideration, I chose Bismoll as the ideal place for a holiday... (scene shows Lester at the spaceport looking at ticket prices and counting the meager amount of cash he has; Bismoll is by far the cheapest)

Panel 4

Lester caption: There I spent my time relaxing and enjoying the sights... (scene shows Lester hard at work as a courier...)

Panel 5

Lester caption: Then, unexpectedly, I met my one true love... (scene shows Lester meeting Tenzil)

Panel 6

Lester caption: He needed money to run his political campaign, so I called my dad, who happily obliged... (scene shows Lester pleading with his father to send him money)

PAGE 6

Panel 1

Lester: Of course, I spent that money on setting up Tenzil's reality show -- which has been a massive success-- and now I have my own money coming in, which is nice I suppose...

Panel 2

Pa Kem: Who're you talking to, Nancy?

Renkil: Let's hit the racetrack, Dad!
Pa: Gladly, boy.

(Pa & Renkil exit)

Panel 3

Lester: Okay, sucks to this! If Tenzil thinks he's gonna ditch me with the in-laws while he's out doing Mordru-knows-what on the credits I enabled him to make, he's got another think coming!!

Panel 4

Bar patron: Who're you talking to, Nancy?

(Lester notices the gang of toughs that now surround his table)

Bar patron # 2: We don't take kindly to yer kind around here, Sally-Jo!

Panel 5

Lester: Oh, YEAH? Well eat THIS!! (reaches into pocket, throws hundreds of credits into the air)

Panel 6

(Lester exits bar while the patrons scramble to grab up credits)

Lester: Poor people are SoooOOoo predictable!

PAGE 7

Panel One
Tenz and Taryn are in the Penthouse.

Tenz: So... I've been doing some investigating, and it turns out that four of my five predecessors as Senator from District 85 were assassinated!

Taryn: What happened to the fifth?

Panel Two

Tenz: Oh, he just disappeared under mysterious circumstances. But you think they'd tell you this when they draft you to run for office!

Taryn: So... do the police have any leads on the guy from last night?

Panel Three

Tenz: No. Strangely, they didn't seem too concerned.

Taryn: Well, at least we'll be ready for him if he tries something again.

Panel Four

Tenz: Yeah. You know... there's something I've been meaning to tell you... thanks for saving my life and stuff...

Taryn: No problem.

Panel Five

Tenzil: I mean it... you've been such a great friend to me over the years. I know sometimes I act like I don't appreciate it...

Taryn: Don't get all sentimental on me, Kem.

Panel Six

Tenz's Mom (from bedroom): Tenzil! Are you there Tenzil?

PAGE 8

Panel 1

Tenzil: Yeah, Ma!

Panel 2

Ma: My feet hurt! I think I've got a touch of the Pain Plague! Will you come rub them for me?

Panel 3

(turns to Taryn, whispers)

Tenzil: Save. Me. Now.

Panel 4

Taryn: Sorry, Mrs. K! Tenzil's got... umm.... big senator-type stuff to do, and he's late!

Panel 5

Ma: Well, I'll just lie here and DIE ALONE then...

(sound effect of door slamming from outside bedroom as T & T exit)

Ma: **sigh!!**

PAGE 9

Panel 1

Tenz and Taryn run into Shirley on their way out.

Tenz: Hey, Shirley! Be a dear and go check on my mom's feet, will ya?

Shirley: Well, I...

Tenz: Thanks, babe!

Panel 2

Taryn: So... you think Lester will want to rub your feet when he gets home?

Tenz: What do you mean?

Taryn: Oh... nothing.

Panel 3

Tenz: Huh?

Taryn: You don't have a clue, do you?

Panel 4

Tenz: About what?

Taryn: Oh, it's just Lester's really... um... likes you.

Panel 5

Tenz: Yeah... I think he kind of looks up to me! Like a big brother or something. It's only him and the sister back home, you know. And it's about time I had a little brother who shows me the respect I deserve, instead of that brat Renkil!

Panel 6

Taryn: Uh... yeah. And speaking of your "little brother"... there he comes now...

PAGE 10


Panel 1

Lester: So. THERE you are. With... with her.

Panel 2

Taryn: "Her"? The name's Taryn, Lester, remember?

Tenzil: I thought your last name was Loy, not Lester!

Taryn: *sigh!!*

Panel 3

Lester: (all dramatic-ey) *CHOKE!!* Tenzil, I'm SOOOOO bored! If something exciting doesn't happen soon, I swear I'm gonna claw my eyeballs out!

Panel 4

(very large & loud explosion)

PAGE 11

Panel 1

Cut to news report

Reporter: Thanks, Kletzel. A series of explosions broke out in downtown Bismopolis today after a "Boom-Boom Beast" escaped from the Capitol Petting Zoo.

Panel 2

(shows picture of "Boom-Boom" Beast

Reporter caption: Boom-Boom beasts are, of course, so-called for their ability to generate spontaneous explosions.

Panel 3

Reporter caption: The shots you are seeing are from cameras filming the popular "Kem Family and Friends" reality show, starring Senator Tenzil Kem.

Panel 4

Reporter caption: Kem and his friends jewelry heir Lester Spiffany and Taryn Loy, daughter of famed scientist Maervyn Loy, happened to be in the vicinity of one of the first explosions.

Panel 5

RC: The problem was quickly contained, due to Senator Kem's quick thinking.

Panel 6

RC: It's not completely clear what happened, but sources say Kem employed a mini-stasis field generator, apparently of a sort used by Taryn Loy's father while experimenting on animal subjects.

Panel 7

RC: Some may remember the protests a few years back over Dr. Loy's controversial experments on parakats.

Panel 8

RC: Fortunately, no one was hurt in today's explosions, thinks to Senator Kem's preparedness and quick action.

Panel 9

RC: I think the citizens of Bismopolis will agree, it's a damn fine thing we've got a great man like him in the Senate. Back to you, Kletzel.

DEAN!!!! I'm swooning here!!! That's a beautiful cover!

(EDE, I'll do page 12 tomorrow-- I'm off for birthday karaoke tonight! Loved your handling of the explosion, BTW!)

That's pretty groovy, Dean! I love how you've got Taryn and Lester looking at each other suspisciously!

(And Lash... Happy Birthday!)

DC, give these guys jobs already!

Yeah DC! Give us jobs!

PAGE 12

Panel 1

Caption: Meanwhile, back on Tartarus*... (*Confess-- you thought we had forgotten, didn't you!)

Evillo: Step forth, woman! Step forth and tell your Prince why he should allow you to join his elite guard, his Devil's Dozen!

Panel 2

Applicant: Watch, Prince Evillo-- as I blast your zombie manservant with the power only I possess!

Panel 3

(shows zombie manservant with spaced-out expression, spouting gibberish)

Panel 4

Evillo: What have you done to him?

Panel 5

Applicant: He has tasted my mind-altering power! The power of... Lotus Fruit Lass!

Panel 6

Evillo: Quite an improvement in his personality. You may stay, Lotus Fruit Lass... for now. NEXT!!

PAGE 13

Panel 1

Brittle Boy: I, Brittle Boy, am gifted with the power to break my body into tiny bits and then reconstitute myself!

Panel 2

Brittle Boy: See how I easily fall apart when your Zombie guard punches me?

Panel 3

(Brittle Boy lies in a pile on the floor)

Panel 4

(Evillo and everyone else continues to stare at the pile.)

Evillo: Well?

Panel 5

Evillo: Shirley! Clean this mess up!

Panel 6

(Shirley, the zombie maid, sweep up Brittle Boy.)

Evillo: NEXT!