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F'n'A, Lardy, F'n' A!

Wow! Just finished reading this latest historical/archieval thread from our resident chronicler extraordinaire (that would be Cobie )

1) I never really thought of myself as one of the Top 10 most powerful LMBPers but I see Cobie has given my variable powers more thought than I have. Based on what you wrote there CK, I think you and I could really combine forces for some truly impressive feats.

2) I also need to figure out how I'm going to meld the power that is the Emerald Eye of Ekron into my repertoir. (Fear not, I have no interest in playing out the Emrald Vi storyline! )

3) If it were not already established that Lasher would somedat become the Time Trapper Mouse, I could easily conceive of a story that would show Varalent in that role. After all, he has been developing some sort of time control powers recently. Add the Emerald Eye to that and who knows what might happen.

It's gratifying & humbling to know that I will forever be remembered by Cobie and others for my post (rather short post, I might add) concerning the the Emerald Dildo of Ekron & the Golden Dildo of Taltar and Star 69.

It was fun to write and still makes me smile knowing that you all enjoy it so much.

Ah, well, see Vee, that's the thing. It's been strongly implied, and in my Lucien Lad origin it's certainly true that a *version* of Lash becomes TTMT *but* that story also deals a lot with alternate worlds and all that gubbins and I'm pretty sure that while it's been implied that Lash will one day become TTMT I'm also pretty sure that there have been hints that that might not actually be true. It sort of depends on whether Lash still has the Living Retcon powers or not.

See, I like the idea that while we have one main suspect to become TTMT we also have other suspects and we never really find out for certain. TTMT could be Lash, it could almost as easily be Lucien Lad (he has sort of time altering powers anyway, so who knows), it could be Glamour Puss (as in the Earth 4 Lucien Lad. That's never been hinted at but it just occured to me...), it could be yourself. The different possibilities make the whole thing much more fun to my mind.

Look, let's be pragmatic here... is there anyone the TMT could NOT be?

Well, I don't think Everyday Girl could be the TMT.

I have a question about how things happen in continuity.

How do characters "join" the LMB? Are there try-outs as in the Legion of yore? Do they just show up and say "I wanna be a part of your groovy group?" Are they recruited?

I'm working on a OneVision with RhL's origin story and I have an idea about his joining, but I want to make sure it jibes with what has gone before.

Thanks!
RhL

Obviously Cobie is the man to answer this for certain, but I;m pretty sure most of the time people have joined just by saying they want to join. There have been sort of recruiting drives (I guess the road trips might count in that respect) but I don't think there have ever been official try outs or anything, unless of course they were part of a tag team or a One vision or something like that. Heh, it'd be quite funny to read about the try outs though and see, considering who *is* in the LMBP, who got rejected (apart from Lester).

Cobie, do you still do this?

Let's see if I can stump you.

How many personas have I been and what major parts did they play at Legion World?

Hm...I count three unanswered questions. If I have a minute during work later, I'll get to them...

I have a question for you, Cobie dear, but perhaps it's best asked... privately

Rockhopper, Bevis is about right. For the most part, its always been a ‘here I am, I’m joining up!’. Usually, something then is reinserted months later into continuity where they became a member. When I wrote the History of the LMB, I often had specific stories show when certain members joined.

One major retcon from back in the day was that the first ten or so members after the initial founders were said to have all been recruited during one large recruitment drive, which included Dev-Em, Looks that Kill Lad, Sketch Lad and a bunch of others.

Another more official recruitment drive (though not ‘try outs’) would be the Road Trips from Year One, which recruited Bevis, Space Tart, Midnight Son and Mighty Fanboy Lad as LMBers (all posters, not made up characters – at least kind of for Spacey).

Then there’s the idea that when the LMB came to Legion World, the already existing ‘Hero Community’ (aka other non-LMB posters), who the LMB had known for months (if not years for some) all joined right there and then to create a much larger community—and that entire story is basically covered in the LMB’s year four (see the history).

However, for the most part, each LMBer has their own origin story which is usually unique to themselves. I’m sure almost every super-hero origin at some point or another has been referenced by an LMBer, or will one day.

Looking forward to yours!

Ah, this will be difficult

I’m more apt to rely on your help for this Viv, but I’ll see what I can do! (I knew I shouldn’t have mentioned people trying to stump me…)

1. Kinetiz Zoe Green – your first ID, which joined during the Vee/Quis term and quicklky became a prominent member. I specifically remember you interacting during the “Alt ID Rebellion” a bit with IB and myself. It should be noted that much later, after KZG was retired, that she was killed by Morgause.

2. RavenArcanna – which was your Titans personality during Titans month (by now you had become quite prominent on the MMB), which also was when you first starting exploring the Priestess aspects to a personality.

3. High Priestess Viviane – which in a sense is your ‘main’ personality, which you return to the most (and IMO the one most people identify you with). With Viv, you introduced the Holy Isle of Avalon to LW, became a security officer, and we also met your extended family: Morgause, Igraine and Morgaine.

During this time, among various other relationships, Viv, while under the spell of her goddess, became impregnated with Abin Quank’s baby, who was born Opal Janell. Viv also was romantically linked to Loser Lad, and he was drawn into the Viviane/Morgause War, in ‘Darblieds, Realm of the Dark’ and the ‘Forgotten Forest’ (I know that one is probably off, but you should be proud at how well I’m remembering ).

4. Divine Opal Janell – When Loser Lad was seduced by Morgause, this led to her being able to kill Viviane, but not before her priestess powers were transferred to Opal, who grew to an elder age while Avalon was away in another realm. Opal killed/banished Morgause and assumed Viviane’s place in the LMB, Avalon and the Security Office.

5. High Priestess Viviane – however, the war was not over, and Morgause returned, with much of the LMB drawn into the mix (myself, Future, Outdoor Miner, Lou, Abin, Matlock). In the end, however, it was Opal who now sacrificed herself to stop Morgause and bring back Viviane, and thus restore order. Thus, Divine Opal Janell passed on, and Viviane returned. All of this stemmed from a primal force that Viviane now had to fight back, so she took her family with her, and stripped Legion World of Avalon, leaving it for a time. In the meantime, the Avalon Liaison Office became means of communication for the Avalonians, and this was run by Pizzazz, mistress of Light (and her alies).
6. Pizzazz – Pizzazz became the central identity for a time, and I remember this time being marked by great change on Legion World (and in the LMB), and Pizzazz actually became Eryk Davis Ester’s second in command in his Triumvirate Army while she remained on this plain.

7. Rainmaker – see below

8. Grand High Witch Eva Ernst – see below

9. High Priestess Viviane – after a few more names changes that were brief, High Priestess Viviane returned as your moniker and in continuity, along with the Holy Isle of Avalon and Viv’s extended family. This was how things stayed for a long while, with side stories here and there, and then a very slow period of posting on the MMB, until finally [in the Spring of 2005] things began to pick up again. The Security Office received a new building (re: new thread) and you and I announced that not only were we mutually enamored with one another, we were going to get married.

10. Dark Priestess Viviane – this of course kicked off the eventful and much beloved “the Good, the Dark and the Dead Saga”, as Viviane apparently became evil and dark and was waging war on the LMB and Legion World. For a time, the LMB battled her (re: Viv and Cobie’s wedding didn’t work out), with the Holy Isle of Avalon now being the War Isle of Avalon. It appeared Morgause was actually on our side, but by the end of the whole saga it was revealed that this was a ruse by Morgause, and you (Viviane) were actually still a strong LMB ally and friend. It was during this time that KZG was killed. High Priestess Viviane rejoined the LMB, but an air of mistrust and guilt surrounded her, and she left for awhile, so in her place was…

11. Darcy – who was not a member of the LMB, but an enemy that was trying to create a school of magic that was a centerpoint for controlling the universe, although she and her sister were stopped by High Priestess Viviane who returned to make amends for ‘GD&D’ (with help from Igraine and Morgraine).

12. Luna – however, High Priestess Viviane did not rejoin the LMB or Office of Security, and once more exited Legion World with the Holy Isle of Avalon and her family. This time, the Weird Sisters, led by Luna (re: your ID) arrived, and were around for a time. This was your ID up until you last left (sometime around Infinite Crisis).

13. And NOW – High Priestess Viviane returned recently and resumed her role as an LMBer and Security Office (by this time she had long ago become Lead Officer of Magical Crimes Division), although she once more left quickly (perhaps to gather her affairs in order) and welcomed her old ally and former LMBer Pizzazz to take up her role here.


So basically, there are five LMBers that you’ve had with the main IDs (KZG, Viviane, Opal, Pizzazz and Luna), although Viviane is the lead one. Pizzazz has her own history with the team and KZG and Opal are deceased, while Luna remains largely a mystery.

I know, I’m good

OK, I still will get to this!

This will probably be one of the more opinionated answers (I gotta work some time!)

It's right here! .

I did just make an adjustment to it. Since we've established that Tamper Lad didn't officially "join" till sometime in the one-year gap, I've changed the reference to him to Stealth (which is more accurate anyway).

Someday I'll learn the difference between "edit" and "quote".

THE VILLAINS

That’s a tough call. We all have our favorites, and mine are definitely not the same as other people’s lists. So, as usual, I’ll brave the fact that I will most likely slight some poster for not mentioning their creation as one of my villains and give you my list of the most dastardly, most hurtful and the worst!

Remember, this isn’t the most powerful, and its not an index of LMB villains! There’s tons I’m not mentioning, but I can only post for so long before I have to go back to work! I know every single LMB villain, so if you feel I left someone out…you’re just not asking the right question


Those that hurt the LMB the Most
Disclaimer: This is broken down in 2 ways, which is important. There are those that hurt the ENTIRE LMB the worst, and those that hurt individual LMBers the worst. The ones that hurt individual LMBers usually were creations by a specific poster for a storyline or Onevision involving that poster. While often very potent, and in that story possibly defiling or hurting the entire LMB, I would call these more ‘Nemesis’ villains. I have my own, Dr. Albert Hoffman, who tortured Cobalt Kid on and off for three years, practically leading him on the path his life has taken and magically cursing him so that he never gets to raise his own children. Others include Sorceress Morgause and Mordra the Harlot, who actually both hurt the LMB a lot, but are more the Nemesis of High Priestess Viviane and LardLad respectively. The other kind are more villains of all the LMB as a whole that hurt them the most:

The Time Mouse Trapper – the oldest of all the most dastardly of the LMB’s villains, the TMT has hurt them countless times and tons countless things. But in Year Three, it became much more personal, when he specifically oversaw the creation and then erasure of the LMB’s own children. Princess Crujectra & Stu, Beagle Boy & Amber, Cobalt Kid & Space Tart and Cobalt Kid and Debauchery Damsel’s children were all subjected to sad ends b/c of the TMT and thus left all of the LMB, especially the rest who saw their friends in such pain, with a full-on hatred. This is why the LMB abandoned the TMT, powerless, at the end of time when they last fought him.

The Red Bee – The Red Bee (mainly b/c he was an actual poster and not a fictional creation) actually betrayed the LMB in one of their most major stories, and then killed Space Ranger, a beloved LMBer in another. He’s the only true real villain that posts on Legion World these days IMO.

The Anti-Moderator – who, of course, must be considered the worst. The LMB have watched him almost destroy the universe at the end of Year Two and be responsible for the deaths of Foxy Roxy, Lexbose, Silicon Sandra, the Legion of Super Holograms and others, then in Year Three destroy the Remarkable Worlds of Phineas B. Fuddle. Even worse, in Year Four he put them through the horrible experience of LMB Lost, and then recently, the death of the Emerald Empress and LMB: Infinite Crisis assures that he is the worst foe the LMB have. I also, personally, don’t expect to see him again (which will IMO keep him as forever the worst foe—can’t go to the well one too many times).


The Most Dastardly
What does this mean? Why is it different than hurt them the most? Hell if I know!

Pornis – whose goal is to enslave all of the world, and has come close plenty of times. The Pornis wars of the Year Four tag threads are some of the best to read, and he reads like a Mordru for the LMB. He also comes across as just…one of the most dastardly of them all!

The One Called the One – who is the arch-nemesis of Pornis. She has at times seemed more humane and more sympathetic in my eyes, but we can’t forget that she’s the original LMB villain that wanted to cut off all men’s penises across the galaxy. Trend-setter for sure!

The Trumpeter – I get a kick out of this villain. Originally created by EDE in “Crisis on Earth-4!” as a cross b/t the Fiddler and a joke in Harbinger’s sig, the Trumpeter ended up being *the* Lex Luthor of LMB lore IMO. A brilliant plan that killed Lardy and IB of Earth-4 and nearly ended all that there was. And apparently, he’s just a super-genius…but it took all of the LMB and the SMB to stop him.


The most Misunderstood
Well, there are a couple (hell, all of ‘em). But these stick out as not the most misunderstood, although still dastardly and hurtful enough to a part of this post

Lucifer Lass – killer. Agent of the One Called the One. One of the scariest and biggest build-ups of an LMB villain ever. And recently…a potential LMB ally? Or at least someone who lives on Legion World? Certainly the classification ‘villain’ can’t be simply applied here…but she certainly is not a force of good!

The Royal Inquisitor – one of *the* originally villains of Legion World, he actually killed Giant Squid (first murder in LW posting history!) and later kicked off the Alt ID rebellion, before coming back to raise hell in ‘GD&D’. But yet…Quis says he had a rough childhood and is misunderstood. More to him that we thought? Probably. But can we forgive him? Hard to say.

Hummer Lass – I wasn’t going to include her, but I felt I had to at least. Her story is far from over, although this once longtime antagonist of the LMB has helped them on more than one occasion over the years…to the point where she’s almost an honorary member—definitely because of her love affair with LardLad. But I fear dark days are in her future…as 5 Year Later it appears she made some horrible decisions…for herself *and* the LMB.

Gay-lipso – Villain? Definitely. Evil? Weeeeell, I wouldn’t go that far. Hero? Ha! Most definitely not. Recurring antagonist to the LMB for the next five years with his own agenda…yeah, that’s a safe bet! The Earth-4 Lucien Lad, who was always a villain has enough power to battle the whole LMB, and I expect we’ll see what a bit of that in the future.


Classic LMB Villains that must be mentioned
Whoredru – Ultra-powerful with a hate for the LMB, she’s been fighting them since Year One. The only problem, of course, is that she’s often left forgotten, until Lardy recently restored her to full villainess potential.

Salad-Tosser Lord – Created in the very first LMB tag thread, Salad-Tosser Lord usually appears at least once every tag thread we do. At this point though, he hasn’t really been the mastermind in a long time or even given them too hard of a time, but that’s OK. As his creator (indeed, possibly my first contribution to LMB lore!) I like his history. He certainly once was one of the LMB’s toughest foes!

Phineas B. Fuddle – the true enemy behind the Dark Stu Saga, who must have planned that entire thing for two years, since it was so intricate. For five weeks it looked like the end of Legion World and the LMB as we knew it… The only reason he’s not on the ‘most dastardly’ list is because he’s appeared so little and we didn’t really get to know much about him. Still, a mention must be made for ‘the Dark Stu Saga’.


I’ve left a whole bunch off, because I’m too lazy right now to dig through old threads or count others.

I believe this deserves a damn.

I am currentlt writing a short story to explain all my changes, hopefully very short!

Rainmaker and Grand High Witch Eva Ernst lasted a total of 48 minutes, combined.

Also, I think that once I'm done with my fic, I will stick to one persona, but my problem is I like Luna and Viv equally and cannot choose...

GOOD JOB, I COMMEND YOU!

This may sound weird, but I think I like it when Cobie talks about me.

Cobester - Just wondering - what's your favourite quote?
I figured that whilst researching the history you must have re-read a line or two that filled you with emotion - whether it be anger, joy, laughter, foreboding, warmth, humility, or whatever.

Would you care to share any that especially stuck with you, please. (And you can put them in context if you want to.)

Great question Numf! I’ve actually been giving this one some thought, since I’m much more apt to forget quotes. There have been some great ones over the years though. I tend to put quotes into all of my own stories, although most might not realize that I rip off 2,000 years of fiction most of the time (my entire history of the triumvirate blatantly steals from Herodotus, Plutarch, etc.).

Some good ones:

"Harbi goes bananas” – not a quote, but one from you [Numf-El] referring to the Harbinger sex film in your first onevision (within the Ongoing tag thread). When I reread that recently I literally laughed out loud.

“Oh no! The girls are revolting!” – by Pov, when Thora announced her invasion on Legion World. Lash actually had this as his sig for awhile, which made it even funnier.

“Hey guys! It’s me Lardy! I dressed in drag undercover here on Taltar for the last few months, and since there’s plenty of bearded chicks with dicks, no one even noticed!” – I think that one speaks for itself (the quote might be slightly off).

In any tag thread there’s usually a couple of quotes by Eryk Davis Ester that crack me up, especially ones like “Holy Harbi, we’ve got to…” or “LAM’s sake folks, we need…” But the funniest one is when he had Martian Manhunter say “By the red sands of mars!” For some reason that made me laugh pretty hard.

And Abin has a great quote that I probably shouldn’t repeat, since it came about pre-Rules, during the second ‘All new, not-so-different LMB Tag Thread’ about Giant Robotic Lesbian bursting into the Hootchie Hut to kill Cobalt Kid after he got her drunk and laid. Its so funny, angry and dirty that I’m laughing now about it. I’ll have to find it…(Its like on the top of page four or something).

Hm. There’s hundreds more. The tag threads are full of them…

*heh* Can't believe I made the short list! Hell, 'chicks with dicks' jokes never get old!

Thanks Cobie.

I'm going to have to go searching for that Abin quote now ......

(top of page 3 - and yes, it does have a certain je ne c'est pas about it)

One of my favourite quotes is the one that's still in my sig. It was actually a sig from Space Ranger before his untimely demise and it just amused em so much that I nicked it for myself.