Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Bits o' Legionnaire Business "Omnia mutantur nos et mutamur in illis" - 52 days after INVASION

"Robert Green Ingersoll was known as the Great Agnostic." said Non Sequitor to no one in particular.

Streets of Legion World

Jailbait Lass and Dedman walked quietly down the streets of Legion World, taking in the brisk air. The sun had started to set and the day had gotten darker. Soon it would be nighttime.

"Should we take these mushrooms?" said Dedman, after a brief silence. No stranger to mind-altering experiences, Dedman had no reservations about testing out that type of method to get further information.

"I...I don't think so. Not yet. I think we'll know when the time is right."

"How very...LMB of you," he smiled. Despite her long-standing ties to the LMB, Jailbait Lass was no LMBer. Just an ally and friend.

So far Dedman had asked few questions, out of his trust for Cobalt Kid and the rest of his LMB brethen. But there was little to tell. Cobalt had confided in Jailbait Lass how important this cannister was, but told her only that it needed to be delivered to Stoopid Cat.

"Maybe...you should just take it to Actor Lad and Kent Shakespeare?" said Dedman finally. "As LMB leaders, they could probably help."

Jailbait Lass shook her head. No, that was the last thing they should do. She wouldn't be responsible for any of her friends being seen as 'conspirators' or such nonsense.

"There's one more place I think might work," she said suddenly. "I didn't even think of it before. Its in the seedier parts of town though."

"Ok..." said Dedman, following her.

Unseen by either, a Winathian Hydra-Moth flickered in the street lights.


The Green
LMB Archive Entry #2121: "Following our mission I've entitled "Journeys and Destinies", I can confirm the existence of the long rumored magic pathway known as 'The Green'. Moving in and out of various planets, dimensions and planes of existence, this pathway made completely of forest connects all of these places together through magical means. I also judge it to be too difficult to travel in and very unreliable." - STU, LMB Leader, 2/6/3004.

She walked through the Green at a steady pace, eager to get off the path as soon as possible. She'd been away so long that she was used to it, but now being so close to Legion World made her hunger to get home. 'Home'? Ha. Not really. But the place where her friends were and where her sister was. Spending all that time in enemy territory made her forget about all those people...

Enough, she told herself. Get off the green and get to Legion World. Find the girl and get her off planet. Scipio and Shark Lad had been very specific about her instructions. And Danger Damsel took pride in completing the missions given to her by Cobalt Kid, both proficiently and in complete secret.


<span style="font-size: 10px;">"Danger Damsel"</span>

Medical Center

Rockhopper Lad blinked in disbelief. "You're Adelie, Princess of the Pyngwyn Colonies, also known as Rockhopper Lass."

"And who are you?"

"I'm Eudyptes, Prince of the Pyngwyn Colonies--Rockhopper Lad."

"Are you my brother?"

"Well, not exactly." The Pyngwyn Prince explained to his "sister" about her unique state.

"I'm not from this universe?"

Rockhopper Lad shook his head sadly.

"And I've lost my memory."

"I'm afraid so."

Rockhopper Lass began to get up.

"Your Highness," Dr. Wasser cried, "You must stay in bed! You're not well!"

Rockhopper Lass, having lost the ability to speak Interlac looked at the doctor with great puzzlement, but, assuming it was regarding her health, shouted in Pyngwyny, "I feel fine! I'm going to find out what's going on!"

"Adelie, please, relax," Rockhopper Lad pleaded. "At least let me help you."

She sighed. "I guess you have to. No one else here seems to speak Pyngwyny and these creatures--I don't know--what are those things they have on their bodies?"

"Clothes. Most humanoids...I'll tell you later. Dr. Wasser, I'd like to take Adelie home with me."

"She's amnesiac and she doesn't speak the language. I don't see how..."

"Please, doctor. I think she needs to be in more comfortable surroundings."

After several weary minutes, Rockhopper Lad convinced the doctor to allow him to take Adelie. "Where are we going?" the puzzled princess asked.

"To the Rookery. You need to be around other Pyngwynyy right now."

LMB Underworld

Down a dark alley in Old Town a woman made homeless during the Invasion flees for her life as a street gang gives chase. She runs as hard as she can but makes a wrong turn into a dead end.

"NO!" she cries.

She whirls around to see the 12 gang members have cut off her exit.

"Please! I have nothing!"

"Oh...I think you do!" says the Talokian who leads this bunch. "Yes, yes you do. I think we are about to have a good time!" Flanked by the others, he approaches her, laser scalpel in hand. "I think we'll start with your top, yes?"

"I don't think so."

Startled, they look up and see a female figure in garb resembing a bat looking down from an adjacent roof.

"Who are you?" the Talokian sneers. "Some LMB reject?"

"No, I'm unaffiliated. It seems the LMB and the Security Office have no time for Old Town. I'm here to protect its innocents!"

And with that, she swoops down and plows into the gang. She's too fast and too skilled for any of them and takes them all down brutally within two minutes.

"Are you all right?" she asks the homeless woman after the last gang member goes down.

"Y-yes...thank you! Wh-who are you?"

"I'm Bat-Fem. Please be more careful in the future. These streets are rough." She gestures toward the bangers. "They'll help spread the word on the streets about me--those that aren't about to go in traction, anyway. Good night."

And she flies up behind a line fired back up to the rooftop.

"ummm...bye..." stammers the homeless woman, and then she quickly runs out of the dead end and toward the flophouse which was her destination before the night became so complicated.

Seth Gaterra's quarters... not much in size, and even less in furnishings. Just a cot, a light, and storage space for his few clothes and other belongings. But he didn't need much; everything had been rationed on Angtu... and the various cells he'd been caged in had even less to offer. And considering the damages done to Legion World, it was best to ask for as little as possible.

There weren't many people Seth knew here yet; most of them were still strangers even after all this time. Which helped matters, in a way... better to face strangers, than see people that he'd remembered as friends and allies. And then he'd have to remember again that those familiar faces didn't know him, hadn't met him; the friendships were elsewhere... elsewhen.

But while Seth didn't know who'd made him remember different lives, different versions of himself -- the doctors had cleared him as sane. The mental tampering was there, but there wasn't anything like commands to go kill people or spy on them; the usual reasons for such manipulations. So he worked on the reconstruction efforts... actually, the deconstruction efforts. It was easier in some regions to just clear out the debris and start over, than try to repair the remains... and a disintegrator came in quite (ahem) handy, for that task.

Seth's crystal children were slightly upset over this; he'd held his power back for them exclusively for so long, they didn't appreciate the smaller "meals" now. So he rested on the cot, directing his thoughts toward soothing them...

The Evil Genius Supper Club (or rather, the back alley behind it)

Jailbait Lass and Dedman walked through the dimly lit area. It was now evening. “The Evil Genius Supper Club, Lolita? Why didn’t you call ahead and ask Tamper Lad or Caliente for their help?”

“Tamper Lad might be an LMBer Dedman,” she replied, “but there’s no doubt he has his own motives for everything. Cobalt has warmed up to him…I’m still not so sure.” Dedman was surprised that Jailbait Lass was so opinionated about various inhabitants of Legion World. “We’re going here to see if one person in particular is dining tonight, though she wouldn’t be inside. Her people are picketing the place now…”

“Thora?! We’re going to see Thora of Taltar?!” he said surprised. Thora had a long history of being in opposition to the LMB and Legion World, despite her continued presence planet side after all these years. “She’d never agree to help, even if it was just to give us information.”

“I don’t know…” said Jailbait Lass, “…her and Cobie seem to get along…well, not really ‘well’ per se, but interestingly…”

“I know Cobalt took Thora’s side in getting her temporary citizenship and diplomatic status here, but I’ve read the file, and its pretty clear that its because she was a former lover of his and mother of one of his children…”

“Yes, but don’t forget that he has had many former lovers and mothers of his children, and most aren’t people he’s fought to keep on Legion World. And he once went to war with her people…his top lieutenant is even named ‘Scipio Taltarus’. No…its more than that. After all this time, I’d say Cobie actually thinks of her as a…friend. And like Mayavale, her status as a Legion World citizen that is not part of the LMB means he might have traded information with her before.”

They saw a Taltarian femi-nazi up ahead. “Excuse me,” said Dedman to the woman, hoping to get her attention. “Would you be able to help---?”

Suddenly, he was cut off from finishing his sentence. The woman’s arms had turned into steel blades, long and sharp, and extending far off her torso. She turned around and plunged them into Dedman’s chest, then pulled them sideways, ripping him apart!! “I’d love to,” yelled the femi-nazi, now turning shape, “the pleasure would be all mine!” she/he finished, revealing ‘herself’ to be Madrox the Multiple Durlan! “Jailbait Lass, I take it? You really shouldn’t be walking in back alleys in the evenings, you know. You could end up getting hurt…”, he smiled. Suddenly Madrox leaped across the alley onto Jailbait Lass, knocking her backwards. “Could you have fallen into that trap any easier?” he cackled.

Jailbait Lass did not scream, and rolled to her side, clutching the canister in her pocket to make sure it was still there. Memories of the Red Bee burying her alive flashed in her head. She fought those memories off, harder than she fought Madrox. A lone tear fell down her cheeks, not because of the Durlan, but because that day would never leave her. Dedman faded from existence mere feet away, his body ripped apart, dead behind the alley.

“Get off her!” yelled a female’s voice, as a large sword came plunging through Madrox’s back. Jailbait Lass did not recognize the voice, or the face of the girl—it was Danger Damsel, a former resident of Legion World. She kicked back Madrox. “No victories for villains on Legion World this day,” she said with a righteous anger in her voice. However, in her attack, she had hit Madrox so hard that it had created a duplicate—now she fought two Durlans head on. Both smiled. One lunged at her, and she did a back-flip, kicking him in the face. The dupe used his abilities to make his arms reach around her like a snake coiling around its prey.

The other, real Madrox, turned towards Jailbait Lass. “Where is it?” he said.

“Got to hell,” she responded. The Durlan had lost his patience, and reached down.

“NO,” said another voice. “You’re on Legion World pal,” the voice continued, stepping out of the shadows. It was Lightning Lad, LMBer and Legion World founder. He did not look happy. “…you should know better than to think there isn’t an army of us waiting for idiots like you. I’m just glad I’m here for this one,” he finished, blasting a bolt of lightning towards the alpha-Madrox, knocking him back. The electricity pulsated throughout the Durlan’s body, and the nature of it did not create another dupe.

A few feet away, Danger Damsel hacked the duplicate into two. Living or not, she was no LMBer, and did not follow the LMB code—she had no qualms about killing an enemy.

Lightning Lad blasted him back harder, and the Durlan tried to regroup. “Hello Anne,” he said to Danger Damsel, “welcome home. Its okay Lolita, we deal with this idiot all the time…he never learns…”

Jailbait Lass ran over to Dedman. “Deddy…” she said.

Dedman smiled. He was fading. “Its okay Lolita. I’ll be back in no time…but I’m taking this Durlan for a ride.” As Dedman died, as was the power of Cannon-Fodder Kid, he entered the poltergeist zone and pulled Madrox in with him. Madrox, distracted by Lightning Lad, was an easy target, and suddenly, disappeared with Dedman, to a place he would very much find terrifying. The Durlan screamed an odd epitaph in his native tongue.

Lightning Lad helped both women up to their feet. “Ok,” he said with a look of grimness, though he was smiling on the inside. “Whose going to tell me what the hell this is all about?”

Danger Damsel looked at Jailbait Lass, who looked sheepish. She was about to speak, when Scott added, “not here either. Who knows whose inside. Don’t worry ladies, its not far from here…

Evil Genius Club

"I found this under the napkin to my coffee from Cafe Cramers." Helena slid the note to Winema. "Hmmmm.. And you say you got this at Cafe Cramers?" "Yes" "This complicates things." "In what way?" "I was sure that Tamper Lad himself was behind the Black Sun's infiltration of Legion World. He may have fooled everyone else with his 'Hey I am a villian who wants to control all the money. Look at me.' routine. But I wasn't fooled."

Helena began to have doubts about Winema's intelligence. Why go to discuss possible wrongdoing right in the place of business of the person you suspect of wrongdoing. Helena shook her head.

"Yes, I see you agree with me. It is hard to believe, but it might just be possible that Fat Cramer is a Black Sun sleeper agent." "Tell me Winema, where did you get your information regarding the Black Sun?" "From Dr. Mayav..." Winema gives Helena a suspicious glance.

A waiter approaches the table. "Ms. Wazzo?" "Yes!" "A message for you Ma'am." Winema reads the note and turns around. Helena follows Winema's eyes and beholds a large man with a white afro haircut. He has six arms, one of which is tipping his Steton hat at the two ladies. Helena wondered who Ike was and why this strange man felt the need to tell everyone he liked him. Winema turned back and handed the note to Helena. The note read "My dearest Cleo (at least that is how I best remember you Winema) Please bring my darling Eleanor whom you are dining with to my Mediation Tent (I have gotten out of the meditation game and now am in the alternative dispute resolution game) I believe that I have some information and some help for you in your investigation into the Jacobians (I think they call themselves the Black Sun now. It is so confusing. Why can't people just stick to one name?) Tell Eleanor that Lucy Mercer won't be there. (I already gave her a mushroom).

Yours
Dr. Mayavale"

Psyonian Embassy - Monthly breakfast meeting of the Legion World Women's Entreprise Society

Princess Crujectra sipped on the Cafe Cramer brew as she exchanged gossip Cramer at the back of the room. At the podium Nova Girl was speaking about the need to reform the lax business laws that had made Legion World a center of the galactic weapons trade and a target for criminals and invading armies.

"So Cramer, its been announced that our speaker is being appointed to head the commission to end criminal trades on Legion World." whispered Crujectra.

"Sounds like Cali's boss won't be happy. Though it's about time. These invasions are bad for the breakfast trade and customers cant even enjoy the crossword over coffee anymore. "

"I know, Everyday Girl's beside herself over not having new comics. She's been storming all over looking for clues."

"Say Princess, where are Winema and Thora this morning? They never miss these breakfasts."

Streets of Legion World

The air was filled with smoke as the Everyday Tank rumbled past the low rent hotels known as 'Cobalt Row'. Several of the establishments had closed in the past year as business was down in the wake of Infinite Crisis and more importantly Cobalt Kid entering a stable relationship.

The tank rolled over some vehicles damaged and abandoned in the Invasion as it rolled past the Mediation tent and towards the Industrial district.

In the cockpit Ken Clarkson rode along taking notes for a feature article about the investigation that would see print when the lost printing company was found.

"Ohmygod, Mister Clarkson. When I find the baddies that stole my comics, ima gonna blow them a new hole."

"Um Miss Everyday, violence doesn't really serve justice" offered the reporter.

Lightning Lad’s Secret Bunker

“In here,” he said, walking into a shabby little corner of another alleyway, that could not be seen from the street.

“This isn’t on any map,” said Jailbait Lass. Most did not realize that Jailbait Lass had the entire city of Legionnopolis memorized, including every secret passage, nook and cranny. Cobalt Kid had hammered into her head how useful such information was.

“Of course not,” said Scott. “And its not the only one either. Don’t forget who you’re speaking too,” he said with an easy-going smile. “After all, I’m a Legion World founder.” The trio walked in, to see a bunker, covered with various equipment, books and tools. It was slightly covered in dust, as if no one had entered in months or possibly even years. “Welcome to the back corner of Gruertis Nyebif Street, or, as I’m now referring to it since you’ve given me the idea, ‘Lightning Lad’s secret bunker’”.

“Nice,” said Danger Damsel, with a bemused expression on her face. “Why the secrecy though, Scott?”

“Why not? We Legion World Founders have our secrets—we must. The LMBers made us proud repelling the Invasion, but we had our own jobs to be accomplished, and worries that needed to be addressed. There is a great deal going on at Legion World that most have no clue about. Its not secrecy per se, we just don’t feel like indulging the information to the general public. You should know that Anne,” he added with a smile, “people sleep better at night when they left in the dark a little.”

Lightning Lad was familiar with Danger Damsel, as he helped train her. Her story was well-known among the LMB: a counter girl at Café Cramer’s that had the bad luck to be on a date with Cobalt Kid when Legion World was attacked. She almost died that night, and then again, on another totally unrelated night, when she was attacked simply because Invisible Brainaic was on a date with her sister. It was that night she made a promise to stop being a victim and start being proactive in her life, ensuring she was in control. She enrolled in the LMB academy and did such a good job that some LMBers, like Lightning Lad, Harbinger and most of all Numf-El, trained her personally. She could never join the LMB as she had no powers and was too green, but she became so proficient in her fighting and espionage skills that she became one of Cobalt Kid’s secret agents out in the dark corners of the galaxy. No one knew much about her after that, as she hadn’t been back on Legion World ever since. But Lightning Lad was immersed in the community he helped found, and he didn’t forget a face—or a friend. And he was one of the teachers that was nice to her and patient, and she always quietly thanked him for that.

“We’re getting side-tracked though,” said Lightning Lad “Jailbait Lass, you were attacked. By Madrox the Multiple Durlan, of all people, here on Legion World. And Anne, excuse me, Danger Damsel, you seemed to know something about it. I think you’ll both agree I deserve an explanation.”

Jailbait Lass hesitated. She felt a little intimidated, but Lightning Lad’s presence was more heroic and impressive than stern or condescending. “I’m…doing something for Cobie. I need to deliver something, but…now I’m getting attacked and I hardy know why. I-I know a great deal about secrets here on Legion World. Cobalt Kid made me privy to many I probably should not be But I only know half the story.”

“You need to be off-world,” said Danger Damsel to her suddenly. “Stoopid Cat isn’t here, and neither is anyone else that can help. Cobalt sent me back here to get you, and bring you into space.”

All got quiet suddenly.

“You’re in luck,” said Scott. “I’m going into space. To get supplies for Legion World’s computer systems. Only Nightcrawler and Saturn Girl know where I’m going, so you can hitch a ride with me. Trust me…no one will get out more under the radar than I will.” With that, he pulled back a tarp, revealing a small hatch. Below them was a sleek, black ship, obviously made for stealth and quiet. “I can drop you off and on the way, you two can stop talking in circles and get to the damn point…” he said, half-joking, half-serious. He smiled, and leaped down into the hatch. He wasn’t one to wait around and talk the night away when work was to be done. “You both can start packing my supplies,” he yelled up, “Saturn enjoys my chivalry, but insists we all do our share of the work…” he trailed off.

Danger Damsel shrugged and started loading. Jailbait Lass followed. “We won’t get a better deal getting off Legion World than this…” she said, grunting while she picked up what appeared to be old parts to space-bots.

“You’ve seen him?” she said, referring to Cobalt Kid.

“Briefly. He didn’t look good,” said Danger Damsel. Cobalt had been hurt by Superboy Prime badly, and then woke up in an uncharacteristically awful rage, before leading the armies into war. The LMBers who joined him, Shark Lad, Hrun and Disaster Boy, were even angrier and terrifying. They had been noble in their war endeavors thus far (or so reported), but there was a worry among those closest to them, no matter how much the Legion World citizens and general masses of the UP thanked them. “But I spent most of my time communicating with Shark Lad and Disaster Boy, and Scipio, Cobalt’s top lieutenant.” The finished loading the ship. “They looked worse…” she muttered, hopping in.

Jailbait Lass held onto her canister. “What a night this has been…” she thought and hopped in.


LMB Plaza, LMB Headquarters

Monitor Duty: Polar Boy, Monkey-Eater Lad.
Ranking Leader on Duty: Actor Lad, LMB Leader
Instant Message from Nightcrawler: Please be aware that Lightning Lad is now currently off-planet, and will be for an unspecified period, per Clause 5.7A (Legion World Founders Clause).

Evil Genius Club

Nova Girl waited until she heard Tamper enter the office where she had been made to wait.

"So there was yet another disturbance outside your club last night."

"Yes and the Security Office took care of it. I should charge them a commission based on how much easier i make their jobs. Now what can I do for you, help you build a socialist paradise perhaps?"

"Don't get too cocky Mr. Evil Genius. My sources tell me you're being investigated by Legion World's counter-intelligence organization. It would behoove you to co-operate with me."

"That is ridiculous. Who is leading this farce might I ask?"

"Winema Wazzo."

"That old crone, surely you jest. She's as competent as Cobalt Kid. I only allow her in the club because she might bring her daughter the holoactress with her one of these days."

"Always looking for a date Tamper, trust me Tinya's outta your league."

Nova Girl batted her eyes as she made a flirty jesture mocking Tamper's almost Pavlovian response to such behaviors.

"Regardless, I suppose I should congratulate you on your appointment Veronica. Shall I call Betty with the news?"

Tamper passed an envelope to his guest.

"DONT CALL ME THAT! And if you call my mother I'll shut this place down. And what's this now? A bribe is it?"

"Nothing so dramatic, its your Club Membership. Feel free to investigate any activity you wish here, subject to the house rules of course. And stay away from the gaming tables, I know you cheat."

DARK OVAL SHIP - FLAMING DEATH

On the Bridge of the star slayer class warship a low ranking communications officer nervously approaches the brooding figure of Adaptus Magi Kort.

“Sir” he starts nervously.

“You dare to interrupt an Adaptus do you” says Kort as his foul slime covered tentacles move his fat, bloated, pustule filled body to look at the communications officer. Behind him the ships Commodore looked on in fear and relief.

“A thousand pardons wise one” continues the Hrykosian officer his face visibly blanching. “But you did give orders to be informed immediately should the attacks of the LMB cease”

“Well then, continue with your report” said the Adeptus, the membranes on his 5 eyes opening and closing with a cold calculating intensity. Behind him the Commodore who so recently had been the subject of the Adeptus’s wrath audibly relaxed. As She did so a tentacle shot out from beneath the Adeptus loose fitting robe and grasped the Commodore by the neck. A face appeared at the end of a second tentacle and spoke quietly to the Commodore, “oh no my dear, it is not that easy”

“WELL FOOL, CONTINUE” Kort shouted at the startled junior,

Gulping the communications officer started to give his report.

“sir, we have bad news, the one known as Cobalt Kid has now left the attack, after destroying all of our fighter support”

“But that is good news” started the Commodore, “we can leave now and regroup if he has gone”

There was a soft ‘snick’ as the Commodores neck was broken and a thud as the body was thrown across the Bridge. “Fool” spat Kort. “All hands to the main batteries” it shouted, “the main assault is about to begin”


DEEP SPACE Near the Flaming Death

A fleet of Dragon ships from the Northern Barbarian Hordes were awaiting orders.

A holoscreen flickered into life, on the screen an image of Cobalt Kid, tired but grimly determined.

“OK Hrun, I have cleared the fighter screen its up to your boys to board and destroy that star slayer. I have to get over to the, well you know what are plans are. Good luck noble warrior. Fight well”

As the image faded Hrun the Barbarian turned to his House Ceorl. “Grima, let the drums roll, ramming speed”

Deep Space, the East Bismollian Trading Route

“This is delicious Scott,” said Danger Damsel, ripping into a piece of chicken as if it were the last bit of food in the multiverse. “You have no idea how long it’s been since I’ve had a decent meal. The gruel they eat in the Barbarian Hordes is…well, let’s just say it isn’t the most pleasant cuisine.”

“You’ve been to the Barbarian Hordes?” said Jailbait Lass. “So that’s who you are…” she added, “I know ‘Danger Damsel’ and ‘Anne’ of course, but you’re Agent-Y. Cobalt Kid’s top agent in the Barbarian Hordes.”

“Correct,” replied Danger Damsel, paying little attention and continuing to eat. “But I had to leave, to come find you. Not that I wanted to…” she added with a bit of a bite to her words. Jailbait Lass wasn’t sure if she liked Danger Damsel yet. She really wasn’t all that pleasant to be around.

“Why then? Why leave your long-stationed post just to come find me? I was doing fine without you…”

“Well, not exactly fine,” said Scott, handing Jailbait Lass a cup of hot soup. She nodded thanks to him. “But you have friends on Legion World Lolita, so I see your point. Why leave it?”

Jailbait Lass shrugged. “I have something of great value to Cobie, though I’m not sure what it is. The only people who do know are Dr. Mayavale, Hrun, Stoopid Cat and Cobie, and it has something to do with some sort of secret or conspiracy of their own.”

“I know of it,” said Scott quietly. Both females were surprised. He shrugged them off. “There is little I don’t know about, girls. But I don’t know what’s inside of it, only that it exists. Stoopid Cat’s Alt ID files. And you say Stoopid Cat was supposed to pick it up and is no where to be found and Mayavale was of no help. So you’re returning it to Cobie?”

“I hope to. It says ‘Stoopid Cat’s Alt ID files’ but the real name is ‘Security Iniatitive #247: World War VII’. There hasn’t been a galactic war in two centuries…not the type that incur the name ‘World War’. I’m not sure what this is about…Cobie never told me…”

“Don’t worry Lolita,” said Scott, comforting her. “Cobie confides more in you than his lifelong friends and most trusted allies. But he never gives anyone person the whole story. That’s part of his Ggrrggian upbringing—he can’t help it. It’s a political tool that has become a social norm for Ggrrgg.” He turned to Danger Damsel now. “And how do you fit in?”

She was quiet. “I was in the Barbarian Hordes, as you know. Working for Cobalt as one of his secret spies he’s allowed. The usual—reporting, finding out information, etc. The Barbarian Horde is of course a misnomer. There is no such thing as a Barbarian Horde. It’s the biggest part of space that is not part of one sector…its all filled with unaffiliated planets and people, yes, but its not one united kingdom or empire. The Barbarian Horde got its name decades ago as a sector of space with various kingdoms, peoples and empires. All are at war with the UP (almost all), and most are at war with each other.”

“Yes, this is common knowledge,” said Scott. “In the fourth year of the LMB, while the LMB was lost in another dimension and Earth ceded from the UP, the universe went to shit. Its been called ‘The Time of Troubles’ by historians because various Barbarian Hordes attacked the United Planets. They invaded all over the huge intergalactic border and penetrated deep into other places. It took three years to fight them back. Three years of genocide, rape, pillaging, theft and murder. And I’m proud to say, the main reason they actually were fought back to their borders, because the UP military isn’t worth half a damn, is the LMB Triumvirate.” Lightning Lad had never spoken about the Triumvirate in public before. “They used their armies to beat them back and eliminate their presence in the UP. Now they hold them on their borders.”

“This is true,” said Danger Damsel. “And the true nature of the ongoing war with the Barbarian Hordes and the LMB Triumvirate, which basically is now a stalemate at the borders is this: the LMB Triumvirate does not hold the borders to keep the Barbarians in. They hold them to keep others out..”

Lightning Lad nodded. “I see. A good strategy. Example?”

Jailbait Lass knew this too. “Earth has continually tried to contact the Barbarian Horde since it ceded from the UP. It never has. Pirate ships often take their cargo. If a ship does reach the Barbarian Horde, it will never enter it.”

Lightning Lad chuckled. “If only all of Legion World knew this…” He sat back. “So Cobalt, and lets face it, the other two Triumvirs have retired their armies for now, does not allow Earth to communicate with the Barbarian Horde? And these pirates…I bet they usually get by the UP and other security forces just barely. You’d almost think they were on someone’s payroll.”

“It would be a good strategy of ensuring the Barbarian Horde remains short of good technology and allies. The point, you must remember, is disunity. The horde must not be unified. That is Cobalt’s greatest fear,” said Jailbait Lass.

“Anne, Anne, Anne,” said Scott suddenly, turning from Jailbait Lass to Danger Damsel, looking at her with new eyes. “I’ve just realized what it is you do there. You don’t just gather information and spy. You actively encourage the disunity. I can only imagine what it is you’ve done. Your mission is so simple: you do whatever you can to make sure they are not united.”

“Correct,” said Danger Damsel. “Call me what you want…spy, terrorist, subversive. Its what I do now.”

Deep Space, East Bismollian Trading Route

“Correct.” Danger Damsel was unapologetic. “And, as you know, there is no single entity within the Barbarian Horde the controls it all. One of the greatest allies of the LMB, an LMBer himself stems from the Northern Territories of it.”

“Yes, Hrun the Barbarian, one of Cobalt’s best allies,” said Jailbait Lass. This is noted by his name beginning with a ‘Hr-‘, like the ‘Hyrkosians’. They both are examples of the disunity of the Barbarian Hordes. The Hyrkosians betrayed the hordes to join the Dark Oval decades ago, and Hrun has in recent years allied with the LMB and Legion World*.”

“Right. They’re not unified. There is one large entity though, that is, and has been trying to amass a large force for sometime. The Khanate of Carthac.”

“What does this have to do with Lolita’s secret item, though?” said Lightning Lad. “You’ve given me plenty of story—now tie it together. I’ve been aware of many of these things for some time. Here’s what you both don’t realize: Cobalt keeps Nightcrawler and myself informed of all his dealings, and always has, without our ever asking. His Office of Security, his army, all of it. Should I be concerned?”

A flash of sadness went of Jailbait Lass’ face. “No,” she said finally. She had doubts about Cobalt’s anger, but trusted him. “No, you shouldn’t. But, things have changed.”

“I’ve been in the Barbarian Horde for two years,” said Danger Damsel. “When Legion World was invaded, everyone knew of it and watched to see how it could benefit them. And then suddenly, the Dark Oval attacked the Barbarian Horde! It was unthinkable! They apparently were trying to take over all of space.” She had their attention now. “But the truth is, they were not. The Dark Oval never did such a thing. They are too smart. The Dominators, despite their arrogance, are too calculating. They would never invade the UP and the Barbarian Horde at the same time. They were set up. Somebody crashed two Dark Oval ship...heir outpost and kicked off a war . Indeed, the fact that the Dark Oval had a two front war made it much easier for Legion World to win their war and continue to win ever since. But I’m telling you, the Dark Oval would never have done it…”

Lightning Lad looked at her and his eyes creased. He certainly knew nothing of this. And he didn’t like it. He understood the way the world worked and compromises would be made. But he believed in truth. Justice. Doing what’s right. He was a true hero. He looked at Jailbait Lass.

“It wasn’t Cobalt sir. He knew nothing about it, and was comatose.” Lightning Lad showed some sign of relief. Jailbait Lass was processing the information. Suddenly a thought occurred to her. Her eyes went wide with horror. “Oh no!!” she said, almost yelling.

Danger Damsel was waiting for it. “Oh yes,” she said quietly. “Cobalt would never do it, because its his greatest fear. The Barbarian Horde, ideally, are a disunited, backwards conglomerate of enemy kingdoms. But now they have a common enemy, and a horrifying one: the Dark Oval. By giving this enemy to them, whoever it was, that person set into motion the Triumvirate’s greatest fear. They’ve given them cause to unite, under one banner, to carry out a war with their common enemy. That’s why I left the Barbarian Horde. Because they are a united front suddenly, and have been mobilizing for over fifty days. They are on the move and they are ready to go to war with the Dark Oval.”

Lightning Lad shifted. “It would seem as if it would be a great boon to us,” he said, “with the Dark Oval having another enemy. But someone created a possible monster. As long as they are at war with the Dark Oval, they’ll only grow stronger as a kingdom. Let me guess—this Khanate of Carthanc has taken hold of much of the Horde?”

“Yes,” said Danger Damsel. “Not all of it, of course, but a great deal of it. They march under one banner, under one King. He calls himself Dominus and he’s formidable. He’s a half-Barbarian/half-Khund, and was personally trained on Ggrrgg with the war-masters there. He’s an excellent strategist, and his people are anything but Barbarian. They are technologically sound and encourage intellectual thought. Dominus and the Barbarians are a great enemy and they are on the verge of being unleashed.”

“Why didn’t you tell Cobalt?” said Jailbait Lass, growing angry. “Or anyone else? What about Eryk Davis Ester? He’s a great hero and he has an army?”

“Calm down Lolita,” said Scott quietly. She did.

“I did tell Cobalt,” said Danger Damsel back. “And you know what? He’s so consumed in his rage towards the Dark Oval that he said and did nothing. He just looked grim. He didn’t see me again, and had Shark Lad and Scipio talk to me. They said ‘change of plan. Go to Legion World and collect Jailbait Lass. She has an item that will help us finish this war.’ That’s all he said. Nothing about Stoopid Cat, nothing about the Barbarian Horde and nothing about Dominus. So here I am.”

“So, you’re bringing me to Cobalt?”

“No,” replied Danger Damsel. “I’m going to the Barbarian Horde. I didn’t spend two years of my life to watch all my work go to hell. We’re going to the Barbarian Horde for one last bit of intel. And you’re coming with me.”

The ship came to a sudden, but gradual halt. “That’s my stop ladies,” said Lightning Lad. He looked at them both soaking it all in. “Looks like you’ve got some decision making to do…”

*<span style="font-size: 10px;">This ‘Hr-‘ idea was developed by LardLad, and it really kicks ass!</span>

PS - Sorry for the long posts guys! I got carried away. My next few posts will all be much smaller and more fitting to the style of the tag thread!

MEDICUS TWO.

Faraway strode determinedly through the corridors of Legion Worlds main medical facility.
As he walked he saw but barely noticed the long rows of cots filling the rooms and corridors on either side of him. Cots full of the injured and dying inhabitants of Legion world. All around the medical staff worked a small dedicated group who were doing their best to heal and save the injured of the late invasion.
Turning into a small nondescript room, Faraway looked quickly around and then locked the door.

“well?” said the figure sitting behind the desk.

“It begins” said Faraway,. “the brothers must be recalled, the fate we have striven across the multiverse to prevent may be upon us”

“is there no other choice” asked the figure

“I fear not” replied Faraway “Earth 4 may already have fallen to the enemy”

“I know” said the figure,” very well, do what you can here and I shall gather the brotherhood”


There was a small sound and a faint, very faint whiff of sulphur, Turning Faraway saw Deadman appearing.

“Hi Far” said Deadman, “What I am doing here on Medicus Two?

Suddenly 6 arrows appeared from no where and pinned Deadman to the wall of the office.

“ergh, that hurt” said Deadman looking down, before his body died and was returned to the Poltergeist Zone.


STREETS OF LEGION WORLD - COBALT ROW
In the Everyday Tank, Ken Clarkson blinked in surprise as Faraway Lad suddenly appeared.

“Now that’s funny” Said Far, “I should have been faraway from here”

“Likeohmygod, OHMYGODohmygod MR Faraway sir what are you dong here do you want likeany help I am good at helping” said Everyday Girl in a rush as she spun around from the driving seat Guns in hand

“More importantly Eveie what are THEY doing there” said Faraway as he pointed at the three Ken Clarksons now sitting in the tank, notepad in hand but staring in puzzlement at the other two. As they watched two Clarksons faded from view.

“Wow, …that was mega weird” said Everyday Girl


“Look out” Shouted Clarkson and Faraway together.

“what why?” asked Everyday Girl


“There, there" the two men spluttered pointing out of the tanks forward view screen


Spinning back around in the seat “OHmygod. Ohmygod,” she shouted as she frantically tried to avoid the Digi Card Legion ZZX printing press building that had suddenly appeared hovering 6 feet of the ground in front of the tank. It was too late the tank smashed into the building just as gravity took over and the building crashed down on top of it……

DARK OVAL SPACE - THE FLAMING DEATH

Faster and faster the Dragon Ships flew towards the star slayer.

On board the ship the Adeptus Magi was giving orders to the crew.

Huge planet destroying plasma cannon tried, in vain, to lock on to the fast swarm of small piratical vessels that flew in dazzling bewilderment around the ship. Mid range multi phase lasers fired their deadly light rays outward.

As the Dragon ships closed on the space behemoth their own weapon fired, splashing death dealing energy against the force shields and ablative plating of the star slayers hull.

“Lord Adeptus” said a weapons officer, “they do not appear powerful enough to damage our hull, but as long as we are moving we are too swift for our planetary bombardment weapons to track the enemy. It is a standoff Lord”

“No” said the Adaptus Magi “this is but a distraction or a ruse,. They have another plan of that I am sure”

“Lord” continued the weapons officer “if we stop we may be able to target the Dragon ships with our smaller gun batteries”

“Do it” commanded the Adeptus.


On the leading Dragon Ship Hrun was fretting, “Grima, do they show signs of stopping yet”

“No my Yarl. No wait, they are powering down engines, they are stopping” he continued.

“By the Gods, this is it” shouted Hrun “all Dragon ships board them, destroy them. Warriors you may sack the vessel for three days”

As if under one command all the Dragon ships stopped their evasive actions and turning towards the slowing enemy ship headed at speed straight towards it.

From the front of the dragon ships a ramming beak extended and the ships crashed into the sides of the enemy creating shock waves felt all the way onto the Star Slayers bridge. Immediately the hull was breach Barbarian warriors raced across the grappling tunnels and into the belly of the beast.

Hrun was at the forefront of battle singing joyously many songs of death and glory.

In a corridor a barricade had hastily been set up. Behind it stood heavily armed Dark Oval troops. Blasters in hand they felt confident., after all these were but barbarians. But they had taken ship after ship of the Oval and the troops moral was starting to weaken.


Hrun and the warriors of his household reached the corridor and faced the barricades. The bright light and hideous whine of laser based weapons mingled with the salty tang of fresh blood as three warriors were cut down. A small cheer started from the Oval troops but it was short lived as Hrun and the remaining warriors unshipped their shields and charged at the barricades. Blaster fire bounced harmlessly off the highly polished light reflecting shields and all too soon it was bloody hand to hand combat on the barricades.

Hruns axe swung at a blaster pointing at faithful Grima removing the blaster, the hand and half the arm.

“Onwards my children onwards” he sang as he fought. “remember Dark Oval make excellent slaves,. Kill them if you must but take many alive so you may have the profit and the pleasure of them”

Rockhopper's Rookery

A very weary Rockhopper Lad (and Hyvvie the Wonder Beagle) brought a very weary Rockhopper Lass to her room.

"Are you sure none of this rings a bell, Adelie? You spent the last two weeks here."

"No, I'm sorry, Eudyptes. I don't remember a thing."

"Well, maybe you'll remember more after a good night's sleep."

"Now that sounds good. Thank you, Eudyptes--and you too, Hyvvie."

"I've left you a language learning device here. You should have a working knowledge of Interlac within half an hour," the Penguin Prince said, wishing his "sister" a good night.

Rockhopper Lass tried to sleep, but, tired as she was, she was so anxious about her situation, she could not. After an hour, she got up and snuck out of the Rookery. "I've got to find out what happened to me!" She was so careful and quiet that no one in the Rookery--least of all her very sound-sleeping "brother"--heard her. No one, that is except for Hyvvie the Wonder Beagle, curled up at the foot of Rockhopper Lad's bed. Hyvvie tried to no avail to wake Rockhopper Lad. Rockhopper Lad just muttered, "Mmm. My good boy. Good Hyvster." and went back to sleep.

Determined to find Rockhopper Lass, Hyvvie hopped out of bed, opened the door and scampered down the hall and out of the Rookery. Once he was outside, he contacted the other Super-Pets. "Rockhopper Lass must be found!" he told them as he began pursuing her trail.

Hrykosian Fortress, Lin-Dak Nebula, Dark Oval

Collus Hrykos's Ready Room

Collus Hrykos grimly examines the reports of the war with the Barbarians.

Lord Hrykos! Vice-Regent Zyrnyn has arrived.

"Let him in," says Hrykos as he rubs his temples.

Zyrnyn walks into the Ready Room glancing about nervously.

"Report, Zyrnyn," Hrykos says.

"Yes, my Lord. We have finished our analysis of all data regarding the rogue Night Raven that bombed the Barbarian outpost of Rrraahhm," begins the Hrykosian Vice-Regent.

"And?" prompts Hrykos impatiently.

"And the only Night Raven unaccounted for is one we've found missing from the Hronmire Shipyard that was awaiting repair. Hronmire's Chief of Operations, Kazon, only recently realized it was missing. But that has to be the ship that was used in the attack."

"Why in Great Hrxes's Name had this gone unnoticed!!"

"Chief Kazon explained that the Night Raven was earmarked at a low priority as we had 2 warships with severe warp core issues. These problems diverted Hronmire's resources considerably with so many engineers relocated for the war effort. Repair schedules for Fire Hawks and Night Ravens were pushed back with such a drain in manpow--"

"ENOUGH!!!" shouted Hrykos. "So who stole the Night Raven, Zyrnyn?!?!"

Zyrnyn recoils a little and says, "ah, that is, ah, unknown at this point. But we are certain that it had to have been a traitor from within, Lord. Only Chiefs and Supervisors could've gained access to the holding tesseracts under that high level of security. And all of our Chiefs and Supervisors are--"

"Hrykosian," Hrykos finished his underling's thought. "This is an outrage, Vice-Regent! A traitor within the Hrykos Cartel is entirely unprecedented! Find this traitor, Zyrnyn, or I will be finding a new Vice-Regent to replace the one who has become deceased!"

"Y-yes, my Lord!" And Zyrnyn practically runs from the Ready Room to carry out his Lord's orders.

Left alone, Hrykos muses, "a traitor. My dead idiot brother allowed this to happen with his lack of focus and discipline! I'll find this traitor...more importantly, I'll find out who the filthy mongrel is working for and make them PAY!"

the upper room at Quislet's Table

Helena had parted with Winema, agreeing to meet in the morning to visit this Dr. Mayavale. She climbed the backstairs to avoid the crowd as she normally did. She gave a silent thank you to Quislet, Esq. for letting her have this room. He was also employing several of her former troops at Legion World's newest watering hole. Helena pressed the light switch, but the room remained in darkness.

"I prefer that you don't see my face just yet my dear." "Who are you?" replied the former commander. "What do you want?" "What I want is your help. We have been monitoring you. You have broken away from the Dark Oval just as the Black Sun will soon be. We are kindred spirits. Join us. Keep watch of the Wazzo woman. She is a fool, but her pathetic investigations may reveal us before the time is right."

"So the Black Sun has infiltrated Legion World. How many of our...brethern are here?" Helena slowly advanced on the shadowy figure. "Sorry my dear, but the time for secrecy still remains." Unseen by Helena, the figure pulls out a small gun. With a quiet "poof" a small dart strikes Helena. Helena continued towards the figure for two more steps before falling to the floor unconscious. The shadowy figure crouched over Helena, opening up her robotic arm. "There! Now I'll once again be able to see what she sees and hear what she hears."

Seth Gaterra's Quarters...

Seth's crystal children finally calmed down, once they had some uninterrupted time to feed. But Seth himself wasn't calm; he'd mourned for Dal in private, though the loss of the link between them still hurt. What hurt him more was that while he had Dal for only a few weeks before he was taken from her -- that was the luckiest any of his lives had been at love. Most of them didn't even have an opportunity; a few longing glances at some lady, before either she revealed that she didn't share his feelings... or they were separated.

After a restless night, he woke early in the morning. "This isn't working..." Seth muttered to himself, then continued in more normal tones. "That doctor I'd heard about... Mayavale. He seems to be an expert with memories. And if nothing else, those who go to him seem more relaxed afterwards?" Seth nodded to himself, decision made. And after a small breakfast, Seth started out toward Dr. Mayavale's Mediation Tent...

Cobalt Row

Jann Ittorr swept away the chalk outline from the carpet in the of the Secret Retreat Hotel. Fortunately there were no guests to see the crime or subsequent security office investigation. Business was slow.

They did have one guest who had rented a room for a week. A strange hooded fellow he was. In fact there seemed to be hooded cloaked people running all over Legion World lately.

His wife told him that it was just the latest fashion. Because of the popularity of Durla Hold'em Poker on the Holo-net. Many would be competitors wore a costume like the best Durlan players on the circuit.

Still all the cloak and dagger stuff was getting to be too much for the regular joe on Legion World's streets to bear. Maybe this Nova Girl and her promise of a utopian socialist economy free of the root causes of crime was right.

CRASH.....

A building appeared out of the sky and crashed into the street crushing one of the Security Office's brand new patrol vehicles. Within moments a Security Office Team was on site.

"As if things could get any worse for business" she thought.

Under the Rubble of the Legion World Printing Company

"Ohmygod. I think we're like okay"

Glancing around the to the other occupants of the vehicle Everyday Girl decided to take a vote.

"Mr. Faraway Like, Should we wait for help or should I just blast our way out with the big gun?"

"Young Miss Britney, lets wait. I think Mr. Clarkson has had all the excitement he can take. He seems to have fainted."

"Phooey"


Evil Genius Club

"No Caliente, I don't think that wining and dining her will help resolve the Thora crisis."

"It's just a thought. You should try Dr. Mayavale's mediation tent. He offered to help you with your girl troubles last night."

"Absolutely not. I cannot abide that man. Unless I take three doses of his medicine first. Besides, He was refering to my troubles with you."

Evil Genius Club

Sometime later...

A cloaked man (the one who'd been conspiring with Hummer Lass ) arrives and is greeted by Tamper Lad.

"Welcome to the Club, sir! Do you have reservations?"

"Yes, I am Harold R. Wyandotte. I have booked a private meeting room at your establishment."

Tamper looks at his registery. "Yes! Mr. Wyandotte! I see you put down a sizable deposit for--"

"Is something the matter?" Wyandotte asks, noticing Tamper Lad staring at him.

"What are you doing here? This is hardly a place I would expect--"

"Ah, I look familiar to you, do I Tamper Lad?"

"Well, of course you do...you're--!"

"Careful, friend. I understood that your establishment offers complete confidentiality. And..." Wyandotte flashes a jaw-droppingly large credit voucher in front of him, "...I would expect that this will help ensure things remain so, despite my..familiar appearances?"

Visibly drooling, Tamper Lad responds as he snatches the voucher, "never seen you before in my life! I'll show you to the room you reserved. Follow me!"

Tamper leads Mr. Wyandotte to a secluded room. "Here you are--state of the art privacy technology! Your guest hasn't arrived yet, but I'll show him in as soon as he does!"

Wyandotte is about to enter the room when he turns to Tamper and says, "appearances can be deceiving, you know! Or perhaps they aren't?" He grins at Tamper, then closes the door.

Still drooling and reading the voucher, Tamper Lad heads to his office, mumbling, "Whatever! As long as these creds are good, my lips are sealed Mr. 'Harold Ryan Wyandotte'!"

Old Town. Back Alleys.

Bat-Fem prowls the rooftops. But then...the sonic enhancers in her ears pick up a disturbance. Following the sounds, she determines exactly which alley they are coming from and swoops down.

She finds a lone man in a bright costume lying in a pool of his own blood. Looking around, her infra-red lenses see no sign of his assailant. The man is awake but blood is pouring profusely from his mouth, just as it is from a large wound in his chest.

"Hold on," she tells the man, "I'll get you to the hospital!" Even as she says this, she ponders the logistics of it. He's a very large man, and her hovercycle is parked blocks away.

The man tries to speak, but he's choking on his own blood. All he can manage is to clutch at the chest of her costume and look at her pleadingly. He doesn't want to die, but he's losing his hold on life.

In the next instant his eyes stare distantly, and he releases his grip. He's gone.

Sadenned, she assures the departed, "I'll find your killer. I prom--!"

She's startled. She suddenly recognizes the man. His features. His costume. She knows him.

"Oh gods!" She jumps up and backs off in disbelief. She puts her hand over her mouth and whispers, "Lard Lad! Someone has murdered Lard Lad!"

Deep Space, Pillars of Herkhundules

“Wow, there they are,” said Jailbait Lass. “We’re really on the outskirts of the United Planets,” she added plainly. She did not seem thrilled.

“You know,” replied Danger Damsel, “for someone with friends so famous for exploring faraway places, you sure haven’t been all that far from Legion World, Jailbait Lass.” There was a hint of annoyance in Danger Damsel’s voice.

Jailbait Lass gave Danger Damsel a dirty look, though no one was there to see it. They had parting with Lightning Lad seven solar cycles ago, in a remote sector of a remote trading route, and had taken their own ship this far. Jailbait Lass did not want to be there. But here she was—not far off from the oft-referenced and only whispered sector of space called ‘The Barbarian Hordes’.

“What did you expect? Another half-day’s journey and we’d be besieged by ravenous, cannibalistic savages, mounted on space-dragons, pillaging all they see?”

Jailbait Lass remained quiet, peering out into space. Finally she spoke up. “What do you hope to accomplish Anne? Out here, the two of us alone?”

“Well, Lolita,” she replied, annoyed at the use of her real name, “we need to find out what this Dominus fellow is up to. Where he intends to go. What he wants. Is he rallying the Barbarian Hordes to one banner, to invade the Dark Oval? Is he preparing to amass a force so strong that we have our own reasons to fear it?”

Jailbait Lass rolled her eyes. Yes, she understood all that. But what did that actually mean? Go into the Barbarian Horde and lurk in the shadows, from town to town, nation to nation, planet to planet, scouting for intel? That could take years! There was a real danger, here and now, and she had to get this package to Cobalt Kid…

“That’s odd,” said Danger Damsel, “our scanners are going off. There’s a craft approaching. But the Triumvirate armies are not for a thousand leagues off, on the border. This is still UP space, but there’s no trade routes…”

Jailbait Lass checked her belt, and felt the familiar feel (becoming all too familiar) of a blaster that she’d armed herself with. Lightning Lad was kind enough to give it, but now she wished she paid attention when Brittany (Everyday Girl) would enjoy her target practice.

“INCOMING!” yelled Danger Damsel, and suddenly a large ship came into view, spinning in their direction. Danger Damsel went into evasive action mode—apparently, Jailbait Lass thought, she was an accomplished pilot. The enemy ship seemed large and clunky, built for intimidation and girth. Stupid…picking a masculine look to a star-ship when a sleeker, more agile ship would suffice. It was firing on them.

**Incoming Transmission**
‘Unidentified ship—surrender yourselves and prepare to be bordered.’

“Go to hell,” Danger Damsel said back to the ship, shooting off a missile in its direction. It dodged the missile, but the missile went on into the blackness behind it and suddenly destroyed something else. It was another ship—cloaked. Suddenly, many ships began to un-cloak. They were outgunned and big time.

“Shit!” yelled Danger Damsel.

“I hope you’re happy,” said Jailbait Lass, jumping into the co-pilots seat, “lets take a little trip to the Barbarian Horde and get ourselves killed!” she yelled at Danger Damsel. She began punching numbers into the computer.

“What are you doing?”

“Calling for back-up. Invisible Brainiac can make it here if he just tries…he might be able to save us…”

“Wait,” said Danger Damsel, looking out the windows, “there’s no need. Look.” She was pointing, and they could see in the distance a fleet of ships coming into view. It was a small fleet, but obviously a military force, and by the length of the quick and devastating route that followed, a veteran force.

Fifteen minutes later, the commanding cruiser flew beside the smaller ship the two ladies flew and boarded it. They could hear the captain speaking as he walked. He was very terse, slightly brutish and colorful in his language. “Barbarians here? In the United Planets? Evidently, every two bit empire and kingdom thinks they can invade the UP and not pay the price. We should have left some alive so they can go crawling back to their backwoods sector of space and tell them they a true army.” The other soldiers were talking to him, but there voices didn’t carry like his and could not be heard. His was much more commanding and had a hint of anger that Jailbait Lass could tell probably never went away. “Well, now we have to be ready for a second war, although I think they’re probably testing the waters. We have a common enemy after all.” He turned the corner. Jailbait Lass had never seen him before, but instantly knew who it was. Scipio Taltarus. The most decorated military officer in all the armies of the Legion World. He heroically fought and won a series of battles over the last few years that made him a hero to common folk, one of the few non-LMBers to have done so. But, the life of a solider being how it was, he had never had the opportunity to set foot on Legion World and actually see what he was defending. Cobalt spoke of him with great affection and respect.

“Ladies,” he said with a slight nod of his head. He was garbed in bronze like some ancient painting would depict a warrior, and had a flowing red cape. “Lucky for you we were in the area,” he added.

“We would have managed,” said Danger Damsel with no small degree of venom in her words. ‘What was her problem?’, thought Jailbait Lass.

“Yes Anne, I’m sure you would,” replied Scipio. They had met before. “But the Legion World Triumvirate sent a small squadron to check the Barbarian Hordes’ borders and ensure the UP had not been pierced. It seems like that was a wise decision…” he continued, falling quietly into thought. “Why would they do it though…?”

“Scipio?” said Jailbait Lass, speaking up. “Cobalt sent you? I must see him.”

Her demanding tone suddenly made Scipio smile. “Yes, my young friend, I know that,” he replied. “But the road to him is far. I’ll take you to him, but not yet. It appears the entire galaxy is on the brink of a world war.”


Legion World, the Coastal Jungles

Invisible Brainiac’s omni-com blinked red. He noticed it, but could do nothing right away. He was far from the capital city, along the coast of the lower continents, where the Jungles ruled. Here, nature knew no master and Invisible Brainiac respected it. In fact, he was actively trying to put out some fires that seemed to be ravaging the area. The grasslands to the south were burning, as they always did this time of the year, and despite the moisture the jungles had, they couldn’t risk losing what was inside. Also, the gorilla tribe of Legion World, strong allies of the LMB and Legion World Gov., had asked for assistance. As one of the most powerful LMBers, Invisible Brainiac volunteered. He found a quick minute and checked.

“That’s not good…” he said reading the message, “poor Jailbait Lass…I could probably make it, but not until this is done. Hm who’s probably close by...?” he thought, checking the roster of active members of the LMB.

Old Town. Hummer Lass's Apartment.

Hummer Lass showers as blood, not her own, streams down into the drain. Her bloody, disgarded garments lie in a nearby trash can.

"I did it!" she practically sings. "I-I know I wasn't supposed to yet, but there he was stumbling out of the Hootchie Hut. I couldn't help myself! I hope Wyandotte won't be too angry; at least now, he and I can be together without that filth coming between us!"

And she hums her favorite Space Banshees song as she washes the rest of the blood off....

Dark Oval Space, the Planet Epicus

In the great hall of conquering star-ship ‘Leonidas’ the gathering of officers, centurions, United Planets representatives and the ‘Companions’, had now reached a moment of silence. All night victory celebrations had raged on, although a great deal of strategy had been planned and many administrative duties completed. The fleets of the United Planets, led by the LMB Triumvir Cobaltus Primus Augustus, had been victorious this day in battle against the Epicureans, one of the major vassal-states subservient to the Dominion. Despite their status as a vassal-state, the Epicureans were renowned for their cruelty, particularly for their use of theft and slavery as a means of maintaining control of their own subservient planets. One such planet was Antares VII, the home planet of the Proteans, which had been conquered ages ago and cruelly and gradually seen its civilization destroyed. Many past Presidents of the UP had fought for the cause of the Proteans, but to no avail. Thus, Cobalt Kid ensured that this would be one of the first victories, to symbolically show how serious the United Planets and Legion World forces were—while truly being a means to rally even more support to the UP cause.

The Epicurean King was led forth, covered in robes with his hands tied behind his back. He was filthy, and his royal robes and crown had been replaced by dirty rags and sheets. Bringing him forward was Shark Lad, the ferocious LMBer, massive in his stature and terrifying to behold. Shark Lad’s rage had become so horrific in this war, that soldiers often used it sparingly as a reference point for how angry they had become. “If I don’t get a hot shower today, I’ll be as angry as Shark Lad…” was an example. Truth to be told, no soldier, on either side, would willingly witness Shark Lad in battle.

In front of the King, who was pushed to the ground, was Disaster Boy. A grim look was on Disaster Boy’s face. Where had he been all those months? What happened to him? None knew. But something had happened. For he had an edge to him now. Neither cruel nor outright angry, but grim and gritty. “Here now,” he said out loud, and all the officers became quiet, “is the King of the Epicureans. Scourge of the Proteans. Murderer of the 87th United Planets fleet.” He moved to the side.

Now before the King stood Cobaltus Primus Augustus. Indeed, the hero known as Cobalt Kid was nowhere to be seen. Here, instead, was the Triumvir widely reported on these days. Covered in bronze armor with a flowing red cape. Upon his head was a fierce bronze helmet, with red hair parted down the middle. His entire face was covered, with only a slit for the eyes horizontally, and another vertically, forming a ‘T’. His widely renowned handsome features were nowhere to be seen. Only the horrific war armor he now wore. He had a sword in his hand. “King of the Epicureans,” he began, his voice calm to the point of almost uncaring if not for the harshness of it, “in the name of the United Planets and Legion World, I hereby commandeer the Kingdom of Epicus, and all of its conquered nations. Those nations are now free from your rule, and welcomed into the United Planets. Epicus itself is no longer a part of the Dark Oval.” He moved forward. Using his sword, he cut ropes binding the Kings wrists.

“I strip you of your kingship, and name you simply a common man. Your people are free from your rule, whether they desire it or not. You are now a prisoner of the United Planets. However, your entire planet is complicit in the horrible subjugation of the Protean race. I hereby rule that Epicus must spend 50% of all of the planet’s finances to repair the damage done to Antares VII, until the planet is repaired and the Protean race has been repaid for all of the atrocities you have inflicted on them. I also demand 10% of all of your planets resources will be taken by the armies of the United Planets and the Legion World Triumvirate.” His voice was harsh to the point of a sword scarping against metal. “Such is now law.”

He turned and walked away, leaving the once-king on his knees. “Whose law…?” the king said, overwhelmed by his defeat. “Legion World’s? Your own?”

Cobalt looked at him with utter anger and rage, memories of the invasion still moving through his mind. ”Is there any other?”

They soldiers cheered.