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Time-Scope
Postlo3w stories *LATEST UPDATE 13 AUGUST*
by razsolo - 05/06/25 03:40 AM
Legion Worlds Ten - the final chapter. Updated 6 May 25
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/06/25 12:44 AM
I'm Thinking of a DCU character Part 6!
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/06/25 12:36 AM
Bits Of (Random) Legionnaire Business...
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/06/25 12:36 AM
The Non-Legion Comics Trivia Thread Pt 5
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/06/25 12:35 AM
The 2nd All Avengers Thread
by Ann Hebistand - 05/05/25 04:32 PM
Omnicom
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#562318 07/20/07 11:55 PM
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Did you know that BEER contains FEMALE HORMONES?

Last month the University of Lesotho announced the discovery of Female Hormones in beer.
The theory is that beer contains female hormones as hops contain Phytoestrogens and that by drinking enough beer men turn into women. They tested the theory thus:
100 men drank 10 pints of beer each, within a one hour period nad it was observed that 100% of the test subjects;
1)Argued over nothing
2)Refused to apologise when obviously wrong
3)Gained weight
4)Talked excessivelt without making sense
5)Became overly emotional
6)Couldn't drive
7)Failed to think rationally
and finally
8)Had to sit down to urinate
They considered that no further testing was considered necessary and they decided to issue this general warning that men should reconsider their intake of Beer


The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
#562319 07/20/07 11:56 PM
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
just sharing something funny I found elsewhere on the Web. Don't shoot the messenger.


The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
#562320 07/21/07 12:04 AM
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
A guy in his car is stuck in a traffic jam. Suddenly, someone comes to his car and knocks on the window.

The driver asks, "What's happening?"

"Well, some terrorists took G.W. Bush as a hostage, and ask for a 1 million dollar ransom or they will put some gasoline on him and set him on fire."

"Oh God!"

"So, we go from car to car to collect what people can give."

"And how much do people give in the average?"

"About 5 gallons..."


The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
#562321 07/21/07 12:57 AM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,951
Pov Offline
Don't Stop Peelieving
Don't Stop Peelieving
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,951
What's bad about that one??? laugh wink


"Anytime a good book like this is cancelled, I hope another Teen Titan is murdered." --Cobalt

"Anytime an awesome book like S6 is cancelled, I hope EVERY Titan is murdered." --Me
#562322 07/21/07 02:16 AM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141
Not much between despair and ecstacy
Not much between despair and ecstacy
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141
Two Lord of the Rings jokes:

Q: Why did Tolkein write more than one Lord of the Rings book?

A: Force of hobbit.


Q: If Gandalf were a teacher, what would he say to students who failed his class?

A: "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"


Check out my new Power Club website!

The Semi-Great Gildersleeve - writing, super-heroes, and this 'n' that
#562323 08/26/07 02:40 PM
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 2,169
Leader
Leader
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 2,169
Q: What happens when a tornado hits an Italian cheese shop?

A: There's da brie everywhere.

Wait a minute ...

Say it out loud.

There ya go!

#562324 08/28/07 12:02 AM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 9,173
Wanderer
Wanderer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 9,173
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom?

A pickpocket snatches watches...

#562325 08/28/07 12:35 PM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634
Bold Flavors
Bold Flavors
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634
rotflmao

#562326 08/30/07 07:07 AM
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,724
Deputy
Deputy
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,724
Q - What's brown and sticky?

A - A stick.

-------
Q - What's blue and sticky?

A - A Smurf eating an ice cream cone.


[edited for family values]


Hic!
#562327 11/06/09 07:47 PM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141
Not much between despair and ecstacy
Not much between despair and ecstacy
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141
What did Inspector Clouseau say when he got sick?

"Swine flu!"


Check out my new Power Club website!

The Semi-Great Gildersleeve - writing, super-heroes, and this 'n' that
#562328 09/25/10 05:07 PM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 5,608
Wanderer
Wanderer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 5,608
What's Superman's favorite part of a joke?

<span class="spoiler_containter"><span class="spoiler_wording">Click Here For A Spoiler</span><span class="spoiler_text">The "punch" line...</span></span>


Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water...
#562329 09/25/10 05:12 PM
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
strange but not a stranger
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
Quote
Originally posted by Suddenly Seymour:
Q: What happens when a tornado hits an Italian cheese shop?

A: There's da brie everywhere.

Wait a minute ...

Say it out loud.

There ya go!
Shouldn't this be a French cheese shop?


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
#562330 09/25/10 05:19 PM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 5,608
Wanderer
Wanderer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 5,608
I like brie...


Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water...
#562331 09/25/10 05:32 PM
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
strange but not a stranger
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
A priest, a gorilla, and a cowboy walk into a bar. The bartender cries out "What is this? Some kind of bad joke?"


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
#562332 09/25/10 05:35 PM
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 5,608
Wanderer
Wanderer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 5,608
Why did Bruce Wayne's date go so badly?

<span class="spoiler_containter"><span class="spoiler_wording">Click Here For A Spoiler</span><span class="spoiler_text">Because he has bat breath...</span></span>


Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water...
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,846
Fighting Back
Fighting Back
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,846
Christo has died. His coffin will be completely wrapped in white cloth.


Still "Fickles" to my friends.
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,846
Fighting Back
Fighting Back
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,846
Q: What sound does a stoner with a sore throat make?

A: "HEMP HEMP. HEMP HEMP."


Still "Fickles" to my friends.
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 2,493
Leader
Leader
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 2,493
In Andy Sidaris' 1979 film "SEVEN", "Drew Savano" (William Smith) assembles a team of assassins, including weapons specialist "The Professor", played by Richard LePore.

The Professor asks Savano the following:


"What would be the scientific result, of crossing a donkey with an onion?"

"I tell you what... why don't you just TELL me?"

"Alright. Now, most of the time, you wind up with an onion with long, floppy ears.

But every once in a while... you get a PIECE OF ASS that'll brings tears to your eyes.
"


lol

Last edited by profh0011; 07/20/24 10:01 PM.
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,041
Unseen, not unheard
Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,041
ok that made me laugh tongue

Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,087
S
Set Offline
Long live the Legion!
Long live the Legion!
S Offline
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,087
I was going to tell y'all a joke about time travel.

But you didn't like it.


Wrapped Around Your Finger now complete in BITS!
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 7,587
Wanderer
Wanderer
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 7,587
Lol. Thanks Set. I'm laughing and I don't remember why. Maybe it'll come to me soon.

Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,846
Fighting Back
Fighting Back
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,846
Did you hear about the undead stand-up comedian?

He was fired for working blue.


Still "Fickles" to my friends.
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,041
Unseen, not unheard
Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,041
Why do people find Micro Lad rude?

because he's often short with everyone!

Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,087
S
Set Offline
Long live the Legion!
Long live the Legion!
S Offline
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,087
Terrible jokes, a triptych;

Q: What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
A: One's really heavy, and the other's a little lighter.


"I successfully sued to have the drug company pay for my Viagra."
"That must've been expensive."
"Nah, my lawyer was pro-boner."


Never challenge Death to a pillow fight unless you're prepared to face the reaper cushions.


Wrapped Around Your Finger now complete in BITS!
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,041
Unseen, not unheard
Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,041
Why can't Invisible Kid tell a lie?

Because people see right through him.

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