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What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Well, lets face it, it's gotta be the deafness.
I mean, you get these two super folks clappin ass. The sonic boom gonna be deafing anyone near by. Supes and Wondy...half the east coast deaf. Even worse than all the structural damage from the oscillating vibrating of the superbooty.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Great thread Rick!
1) having to wear underwear on the outside
2) having to starve yourself and abstain completely from alcohol, else you won't be able to fit into your skintight suit
3) having to fly without protection against the blinding hot sun, or freezing rain, or windshear, or bugs getting squished against you...
4) having to read the nasty social media comments about you from ungrateful )@()#()_@(
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,419
Nowhere Girl
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Nowhere Girl
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 6,419 |
Having a verse about you written and sung by the guy from Matchbox 20.
Still "Fickles" to my friends.
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
The cost of Nair for "down there" and everywhere.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 3,767
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 3,767 |
Great thread Rick! 2) having to starve yourself and abstain completely from alcohol, else you won't be able to fit into your skintight suit If my powers don't come with a super-metabolism/healing factor/shapeshifting shenanigans to eliminate this risk, I don't want 'em! Mine for sure would be remembering to log in to the right Twitter account so I don't accidentally out myself when I'm telling everyone about how I kicked Sonar's ass yesterday
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
or... having to pretend to get injured like a normal human being, and explain why you're not doubling down in pain after dropping a crate on your foot...
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,055
Long live the Legion!
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Long live the Legion!
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,055 |
Great thread Rick! 3) having to fly without protection against the blinding hot sun, or freezing rain, or windshear, or bugs getting squished against you... Oh yes, anyone who has ridden a motorcyle (without a helmet) knows the existential dread of bugs in your teeth. A june beetle hits like a bullet when you're on the highway! I imagine it would be many times worse when flying, and I suddenly realize why Lex Luthor had the Legion of Doom build their base *in a swamp!* Any time Superman comes to trash their evil plans, he gets mosquitos and clouds of swamp midges in his mouth! The sheer evil genius of that man!
Last edited by Set; 09/03/22 03:51 AM.
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: May 2013
Posts: 7,278
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 7,278 |
I imagine it would be many times worse when flying, and I suddenly realize why Lex Luthor had the Legion of Doom build their base *in a swamp!* Any time Superman comes to trash their evil plans, he gets mosquitos and clouds of swamp midges in his mouth! The sheer evil genius of that man! LOL. What a great image.
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: May 2010
Posts: 2,119
Leader
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Leader
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 2,119 |
Next time we have a DC/Marvel crossover, I want it to take place in the Hostessverse
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
I imagine it would be many times worse when flying, and I suddenly realize why Lex Luthor had the Legion of Doom build their base *in a swamp!* Any time Superman comes to trash their evil plans, he gets mosquitos and clouds of swamp midges in his mouth! The sheer evil genius of that man! LOL. What a great image. When I said that, I wasn't expecting this, but I love it!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Having to pass all the FAA regulations just to prove you can fly. I mean, jeez.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Having your Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts investigated for posting "seditious" content. It was just a meme for grife's sake! And I haven't even figured out Tiktok or Snapchat yet!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Sitting down in a leotard. Things ride up in uncomfortable places.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Trying to hit on hotties while being known as "The Fastest Man Alive".
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,847
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,847 |
Law suits for violating the rights of every super criminal you stop.
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Healthcare. All that flying exposes you to UV rays, air pollution..
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
As with every hero, gotta be an evil love interest. Eva Lean, the Girlfiend.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
having to go to the bathroom in the middle of patrolling. that costume isn't easy to wear!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Oh sure, let one male superhero get pissed off and it's "ah, that bad guy had it coming for 'x'!" But let one woman superhero get pissed and it's "Oh, must be her time of the month!"
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
As an Asian superhero, I'm tired of always being asked: "Is it true you're smaller than other males? How does it feel being less muscular and shorter? Do women and men suddenly find you more attractive now that you're parading around in spandex all the time?"
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Always being broke AF. Look, I'm not a billionaire industrialist with immense family wealth. Before the canister of goo, I was a data processor. Now, some big shit happens, i go to help, lose my job. Best I can get is night clerk at the seven eleven.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,055
Long live the Legion!
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Long live the Legion!
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,055 |
So called 'legacy heroes' with their newfangled power creep nonsense.
I was the original golden age Blandman, darnit, who are these new people using my name? I managed to fight crime with a good right hook and a sedative gas gun, what the heck is an 'Endless?'
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Not being able to drink and relax in the tub, because one never knows when an emergency will happen
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,847
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,847 |
Not being able to drink and relax in the tub, because one never knows when an emergency will happen Unless you're Aqualad, in which case you'd be expected to be in the tub, when there's an emergency.
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: May 2010
Posts: 2,119
Leader
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Leader
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 2,119 |
All the good names are already taken I ended up with 'Dumb Bunny 2'
Next time we have a DC/Marvel crossover, I want it to take place in the Hostessverse
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Danny Chase will just lift the tub and throw you at the enemy
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Where I have to stick the plug to recharge my "energy" powers.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Having to always reply in a nice and polite way, even when I want to scream at idiocy
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
My dinner is always always ALWAYS COLD! GAAAAAHHHHHH! *smashslambreakkickscreamagainstabtrainingdummy* Anger Issues Dan
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Having to keep in absolute top shape, and not eating anything yummy like ice cream or burgers
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Having to wear only a corset, swim trunks, gloves and calf boots and being a dude that comes from a cold planet!
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
no wonder Polar Boy was always all dolled up
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
The "No Fraternization" rule. Yeah, Batman can boink Catwoman and Talia, but let me, Sea List Man, hook up with Evilyn one drunken night when neither of us knew who the other one was, and suddenly I'm "a liability" to the Justice Union of Middle City.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
And heaven help you if a nude of yours gets leaked
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
"....I said send NOODLES! NOODLES! Suddenly all these inappropriate people sending me pics....and of course THAT's what gets reported..."
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
“I only received the pics, i didn’t ask for them!!”
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Bad guys that don't follow societal norms for hygene. I mean really, c'mon Dookie Dude, take a damn bath.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Having so many fans suggestively flirting with you in public
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
Having NO fans suggestively flirting with you in public.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Having fans trying to aggressively flirt with you by invading your home
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 40,648
Trap Timer
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Trap Timer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 40,648 |
Having to pay property taxes on your secret sanctum.
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Having people protest that your secret sanctum could better be used to provide subsidized housing
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,847
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,847 |
Having to allow tourists parties to go round the Fortress of Solitude to make ends meet. No solitude now...
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
Having to allow tourists to take fake wedding pics with me...
... and I have to wear the wedding gown or tux of their choice....
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843
Time Trapper
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OP
Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,843 |
you pop one evil magic weasel...
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Re: What's the worst part of being a "Super" hero?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,997 |
you pop one evil magic zit...
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