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Bad jokes
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/17/25 02:29 AM
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675
Gen X > Space X
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Gen X > Space X
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675 |
294. They found my Twitter account.  No you can't have any details. I'm gonna' go lie down for about six months.
Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on ipernity! Drop by and tell me that I sent you. *updated often!*
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
295. My teeth were too bad, meaning I couldn't smile for the photos...
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307 |
296. I lived to ruin the sleep cycles of the other heroes by strictly enforcing the savings of daylight ritual I found rather quaint from the distant past.
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872 |
297. I didn't want to break the covid restrictions in my area/
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
298. I gained too much weight during COVID, and just could not find the motivation to get fit again.
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872 |
299. Conflicting messages over when to enforce covid laws became a massive headache.
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
300. I could not stop making political tweets.
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872 |
301. I'm boycotting the hero teams, until they nominate me for membership.
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,886
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,886 |
288. Friend, foe, doesn't matter. I manage to tick off everyone.
Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
Something pithy!
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
303. I messed up the counting on all the monitor board lists
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872 |
304. I can only watch, and never intervene!
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,092
Long live the Legion!
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Long live the Legion!
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 9,092 |
305. I was trying to be responsible and socially distancing myself while fighting crime, and it wasn't working out. - the Pugilist
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
306. I was going out offering free hand sanitizer to people... but I accidentally filled my spray bottle with toilet cleaner...
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872 |
307. As Protector of the Sewers, I save people from deadly sewage related viruses. I carry industrial cleaners for my job. How it all got replaced by lavender hand sanitiser, remains a mystery.
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
308. I forgot my face mask, and infected an entire school - The Belcher
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675
Gen X > Space X
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Gen X > Space X
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675 |
309. I'm allergic to lavender. 
Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on ipernity! Drop by and tell me that I sent you. *updated often!*
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
310. I hate taking calls.. except the mayor would also call me for emergencies...
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Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872
Tempus Fugitive
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Tempus Fugitive
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 31,872 |
311. I had all the powers and personality. But being a superhero in the 1500s, meant that by the time the carrier pigeon reached me about the emergency, it was too late to do anything about it.
"...not having to believe in a thing to be interested in it and not having to explain a thing to appreciate the wonder of it."
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
312. The Catholic Church wouldn't bless me as I kept engaging in sinful acts - The Gay Ghost
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307 |
313. I made everyone wear green on St. Patrick's day and Blue Beetle, Red Tornado and Black Canary filed a complaint of discrimination against me stating I was a colorist! Well color me pink!
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 86,100 |
314. I was playing super-frisbee with Krypto and Ace the Bat-Hound, and ended up wrecking the Hall of Justice...
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307 |
315. I brought my bug collection to add to the Hall of Trophies, I didn't know I had not secured Killer Moth, Ambush Bug, the Beetle, Black Widow and Spider-Man onto the display well enough and a huge batte began and destroyed all of the trophies.
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675
Gen X > Space X
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Gen X > Space X
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675 |
316. Hay fever. 
Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on ipernity! Drop by and tell me that I sent you. *updated often!*
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,430
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,430 |
317. I haven't had my COVID shot yet.
Last edited by Gaseous Lad; 03/25/21 02:07 PM. Reason: Added the number!
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Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Sep 2016
Posts: 5,307 |
318. My dog needed a walkies.
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