Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum Sorry I've been away again....

My father was in NY visiting family, and became very ill. He passed away on August 1st. I was in NY for almost a month sitting in the hospital with him. Just got back to L.A. and have decided to move back to Vegas to take care of my Mom. I may not be around that often for the next couple of weeks, but wanted to let you guys know that I'll be back.

For any of you who have lost a parent, how do you get through this?

help.

Sending you plenty of them IB

Bxx

Italian Boy,

I am sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my mom about 15 years ago now. It was quite sudden.

Best I can say is let yourself grieve. But also let yourself have some fun (even if you don't feel like it)

My condolences to you and your family.

IB, I'm sorry to hear about this too.

Here's some for you. I'm not good at giving advice, but I'd say that spending some time with your Mom would be good for both of you.

So sorry for your loss, IB.

IB, to be honest with you I can only tell you to give it time. My father passed away almost 13 years ago or so, but I still miss him a lot. I don't think that you ever turn that figurative corner, you just realize one day that it doesn't hurt so much.

As Quis said, try not to let your loss take all the fun out of your life. It's not the way I think our loved ones want us to remember them. Also don't take anyone's advice too seriously, because grief is something everyone deals with in their own way. Nobody will know what you are going through but you.

Come back when you can, but take your time.

Matt

I'm glad to hear you're okay Italian Boy, but I'm so sorry about your father. Matlock gives good advice...we all grieve in our own ways. Best to just let it ride and return to the status quo of life for awhile, if you want to. Spending time with your mother is ideal as well, because she's probably the best one to talk to right now and could use the support.

I'm sorry to hear about your dad, Italian Boy. I lost my dad last fall, and it's hard. I guess we each deal with our grief differently. There is no right way or wrong way and no-one can tell you what you should be feeling. Time is the only thing that will help you sort it out. For me, there still isn't a day that goes by that I don't mistakenly think, even for a moment, that my dad is still alive. But over time, the realization that he has left has gotten easier, and instead of focusing on the loss, I remember something good about when he was alive, and feel better. Take your time, and hope to see you back here when you're ready.

After posting this, I went back and read the posts in this thread. I was struck by how similar my post, even down to the wording, was to Matlock's. (I honestly wasn't copying you.)

*hugz* to you, IB.

As has been said, there's not a set way to deal with the grief. I know it was difficult enough for me to lose three of my Grandparents. (Still is, some days.)

All I can say is that we're here for you.

And if you ever feel like breaking out with a memory or a story, you've got lots of ears, eyes, and quite a few shoulders here.

Just do me a favor ...
the next time you see your mom, give her a hug.
You, your mother, and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

IB, I second Beagz. Take care of your Mom and give her a hug every time you see her. Having lost both of my parents before I was 30 (my dad passed 10 days before my 9th birthday, my mom shortly before I turned 30) there is nothing I can say that can be of comfort other than spend as much quality time with your Mom as possible.

Take care of yourself and yours and we will always be here for you.

My condolences, IB. I lost my father years ago.

For what it's worth, for dad and other people I've lost over the years, my philosophy is that those of us who live, do so not only for ourselves, but we also live for those who no longer do, and we carry them with us as we journey through life.

No family is perfect, and I hope you can forgive your old man the bad times; it makes the good times that much sweeter when you remember and honor him.

Sean

I'm so sorry Anthony!

Seems like a lot of us have lost a parent, especially our fathers. Mine passed away almost 10 years ago and I still haven't gotten over it completely.

Like the others say, give your mom a hug.

hi there !!

i'm truly sorry to hear about your loss, and i can only echo, what everyone else has said !!

give your Mum a big and just be there for each other !!

Matthew.

Condolences, Italian Boy, for the loss of your father. As the others have said, time eases the grief - and talking, when you feel like it. It's very strange when a parent dies; I suppose we expect it, to some extent, but it's a serious loss and always stirs up a lot of memories and reflections.

Best wishes for your move to Vegas. Check in with us when you can.

Sorry to hear about your loss, IB. Best wishes. You know we're all here for you.

Ken x

I'm a newbie but I empathize with your loss. I hope you can grow strong enough to survive this and remain tender enough to endure it.

Bless you and your family.

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, IB.

I lost my mom nearly 11 years ago and my father two years ago September. For me, having a good faith system helps, as does trying to stay connected to what family I have left. My brother and I call each other out of the blue, for no reason, just to say hi ... that sort of thing.

As detached as it may sound, I also derived comfort from something I heard on TV: "You will never come to terms with a death until you see it as a life completed, not a life interrupted."

God's peace be with you and your family.

Sorry to hear about your loss IB.

As everyone says this is a difficult time for you and yours. Just take every day as it comes. If you need to let off steam, or reminse or even just want to have some fun (and you need that just as much ) then pop back here.

I know you and I don't know each other Italian Boy, but I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my father 4 years ago this month, and I can say it does get easier with time. Nothing will ever completely fill the void that's left in your heart, but after awhile it won't hurt as much.

My condolences for your loss, IB.

Sorry to hear of your loss, IB. Our thoughts are with you and yours at this time.

I am sorry to hear of your loss Italian Boy. My thoughts are with you as well... according to doctors, I will probably lose my father to liver cancer soon... time may be the only way to truly heal, but it's not exactly what you want to hear, b/c 'time' doesn't offer any immediate relief... even though I don't know what you are going through, I know that on my now-frequent visits to my Dad, I think of how happy I am to have had this time with him and try to make sure I treasure every moment. I imagine that if I lose him, I will think back to those and other good times, and reminisce, keeping him alive in my own head, and keeping him alive by talking about those good times with others who shared them.

IB-

If you'd like, maybe it would help you to tell us a few anecdotes about the old man? I'd like to know a little about him, if you're ready to talk about him.