Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum LMB Infinite Crisis: Space Ranger's Funeral

I don't know if I can do this but Gramps is off in space trying to keep Ggrrgg and Pysonia from nuking each other back into the stone age and Gram is off trying to keep Gay-Lipsyncher, or whatever his name is, from single handedly re-decorating the entire planet, so avenging Uncle Spacey's death is my duty now...

But first I need to make certain he receives a proper send-off.

The casket is closed and he never was much for flowers so a few kind words from his friends is all he'd expect.

Space Ranger and I never really got along too well, what with him being a Security Officer and me being a bit of a trouble maker, but out of respect for his brother Abin I decided I ought to come and show my respects.

Legion World has never had a more staunch supporter of law and order than the Ranger, and he will be missed.

*pours 40oz of Genny Cream Ale on the ground*

This is so weird....Was Red Bee responsible? My team were on Earth-4 dealing with the Lucien Lad mystery. I do hope there is such a thing as justice - because Space Ranger was the embodiment of it.

He will be avenged....

space ranger nooooo!!!!

(throws himself on the coffin)

whyyyyy? why? whyyyyy?

Poor Space Ranger, I loved to hate him and I would have hated to make love to him...

He must be avenged!

avenge revenge whatever, thanks for snapping me out of it...lets go kick some nass.

You can count on our help Everyday Chick!

Damn! We've gotta end this before more of us die...

*stands in the back. Eyes coffin. Waiting for everyone else to leave*

Hologram from The Psyonian Galaxy:

I'll say a few words, especially in light of the fact that Sarya, who also knew him so closely, will not be able to do so.

Space Ranger was one of the people I was closer to on Legion World, and had always been since the day we founded the Security Office together. I'll never forget the mutual hesitation to let our guards down around each other, each of us thinking the other was a bit of a tight-ass. Later, he became one of my closest confidants, and was always the one person I trusted implicitly in acting as Security Chief in my absence.

He was rough around the edges, thats for sure...but those of us that *really* knew him liked that part about him. He saw the world in black and white--no gray areas and no hemming and hawing and his part. If things needed to be done, he did not hesitate, he did them. He was there for us when Ms. Grundy was about to destroy all of Legion World. And he helped us battle Phineas B. Fuddle, Thora, Dark Stu and a plethora of other threats. Its hard not to mention his heroism when thinking about him.

He will be missed. He was a brave ally.

And a great friend.

Rest in peace, Space Ranger, and know this: that where you once stood, the LMB still stands, and we will always, always ensure that Truth and Justice do indeed prevail.

I'll say a few words too.

Space Ranger.

He is now crispy fried. Possibly good with chips. Like a honey glazed ham.

What? What? I'm a villain, so sue me.

Don't make me get mad at you today Gay-lipso! Not today!

Even though we are dealing with a Crisis of epic proportions on Legion World and our ranks have been terribly depleted, we must still take time to stop for a moment and honor those that have given their full measure in the defense of our homes and our lives.

Space Ranger is one of those that has given that and more. Almost from the start he has stood with us shoulder to shoulder against every threat. Whether it be mystical, super powered or just plane devious, he was always at the ready to take on anyone that would threaten our peace. He never wavered, never faltered in his determination and fierce protection of those he befriended.

I am proud to have considered him a dear friend and humbled that he extended that same friendship, nay brotherhood, to me. I knew that were I ever in danger or need I could count on him to do everything in his power to aid me. As he did.

At the start of this Crisis we currently face, I was abducted by mysterious forces and sequestered on a desolate asteroid in the far reaches of space. Left unconscious and probably left for dead, I had very little hope of rescue when I finally began to regain my senses. When I opened my eyes however, it was to see that streaking figure in red and blue barreling his way to my side.

I know that many others spent numerous hours and days searching infinity for some sign of my whereabouts and I wll be eternally grateful to them. I also know that my dear friend, the Emerald Empress lost her life...scurrilously murdered...while seeking me. Yet it was Space Ranger that first found me and that I first saw as I opened my eyes on the desolete piece of space debris.

I will never forget that.

Truth and Justice Shall Prevail. That is my solemn oath from this moment forward. I will find those that murdered the Empress and make them pay. I will track down those who murdered the Ranger and bring them to justice. Of that you can be certain Everyday Girl.

Rest in Peace my friend. Take comfort in the knowledge that others have taken up your clarion call and have filled the breach that your passing has left.

Truth and Justice Shall Prevail!

I have no clue what's been going on, but I come to express my deepest sorrow at losing a true friend. (I assume I'm one of the pall-bearers, n'est-ce pas?) My first encounter with Space Ranger was one of misunderstanding arising from his really bad aim. Spacey accidentally blasted my triple marine varnished authentic antique swinging saloon doors, while trying to make truth and justice prevail. Despite our initial rocky start, we became fast friends, once I realized his stiff prep school exterior hid just a regular goofy guy. Spacey and I shared many adventures, not the least of which was that scandalous time on Taltar. Spacey suffered incomprehensible humiliation and degradation at the hands of a dildo wielding space witch, but you know, now matter how mercilessly I teased him about it, he took it like the good sport he was. Spacey I'll miss you. You were an original. I love ya, you big goofy old do-gooder.

Oh, it's you, DB. For a moment there I thought an Albanian widow had crashed the funeral.

Ranger-

Rest well, proud warrior.

We'll again fight at your side in Valhalla.

I always thought he was too full of himself to die.

R.I.P. old friend.

Ditto.

Poor guy... all he wanted to do was protect truth and justice.

Is he Bucky-dead, or Donna Troy-dead?

Unfortunately, Mr. STU, He's DC dead. Gramps told me what Dan Didio told you guys in Boston, "if you see blood and a body he's dead and he ain't coming back!"

Well I saw the body and I got covered in the blood when I brought him home...

**SOB**

Shoot, I'm late. Sorry I was stuck on Earth-4 for a while... But we're back.

Poor Ranger.

I'm back too... Why did this have to happen? Space Ranger was so young, so vital, so full of life...Was Red Bee responsible? If he is, then by God, i will show him what cruel and unusual punishment really means...

I only met Space Ranger once that I remember, but he left a very strong impression. On behalf of the Royal Family of the House of Rockhopper, The Penguin Colonies express their deepest regret at Legion World's loss.

So, when is Everyday going to hunt the perp down?

from a LMBer = from the Red Bee