Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum Dr. K. Nine's Home for Wayward Felines

Don't there be no need to worry, denizens and denizenesses of Legion World. I, Dr. K. Nine, Universally Renounced Pet Psychiatrist, have at the request of Spaced Ranger taken over the care of the two felines known as Stoopid Cat and Queen Connie.

They are both resting comfortably in specialty designeded Cat Carriers and will be returned to you when they are again well.

Please hold your applause and keep quietly so as to not to disturb de patients.

Thank you.

Gasp!

So this is where they are! But where is this Dr. K Nine and where is he keeping them?

It appears there is another alt ID at work here now...

We must find this place immediately!

MRowrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Just you wait until I get out of this cage! Then I'll show you what a crazy cat really is!!!!!


Hzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!

**Mewl**

Where am I?

Can't stay awak...

**Mewl**

If Spaced Ranger suggested it then isn't it probably okay?

Was Stoopid Cat acting strange before? And what constitutes strange around here anyway?

<returns carrying two saucers of cream>

Stoopid Cat I still don't believe that SR would ever allow anyone to hurt you or your friend, (aside)hi there I'm Harbinger pleased to meet you Queen Connie, anyway even if you're in this fine and I presume fully registered institution you needn't do without the little fineries of life so here's some cream so you and your friend needn't have to go without.

<slips bowls through wire mesh to the two cats, maybe accidentally doesn't close the wire mesh as tightly as it had been before>

What a nice lady, I like her!

*squuuueeeeeezzzzzeeeeesssss out through the wire mesh after licking up the last drop of delicious cream in the bowl*

I really should go on a diet. That was a bit tight! Anyway to business!

*begins sharpening claws on carpet...*

No, not quite sharp enough for what I have in mind yet!

*moves to chair and tears big gashes in the seat cushion...*

Hmmmm, almost there...

*uses mahogany desk as a scratching post, digging long, deep gouges into the beautiful wood...*

Purrrrfect! Nothing like a nice manicure to get me in the right frame of mind!

Hey! Stoopid Cat! *rattles cage by jumping up on top of it* Wake up! It's time we got out of here!

**Mewl**

Collar... Must get collar off...

**Mewl**

*Mrowr*

Well then scoot over here so I can get hold of it! That's it, now hold still while I slice through it!

Ahhhhh! Nothing like razor sharp claws to make one's day!

*Mrowr!*

Success!!!! Now let's get you out of there!

What is this place? I've never noticed it on Legion World before?

**Purr**

Thanks, Cutie, but who are you and where are we?

**Purr**

<Squeezes out of cage while talking>

***Prrrrrrrrrrrrr***

I am Queen Constance Felinia Augusta Regia V (or something like that), Queen of the Variable Realm, and current owner of Varalent. (He was bequethed to me by my predecessor.) But you can call me Connie.

I came to Legion World yesterday because I could no longer bear the way that terrible Space Ranger was treating you and getting away with it! Somehow he has everyone fooled.

As for where we are, I'm not certain but I know Space Ranger had the audacity of kidnapping me while I was catnapping at SHAKES! Can you imagine the nerve of him! One moment I was enjoying my little nap and the next I was unceremoniously dumped into that cage and carted here like a sack of potatoes!

He turned me over to the terrible Dr. K. Nine. Space Ranger claims that the oaf is some sort of renowned specialist in treating feline maladies but the ignoramous is just plain idiotic, even for a dog!

You were already here and seemed to be drugged or something! Anyway, once that nice lady, Harbinger brought us cream and accidently on purpose left the wire mesh open a bit, I got out and then started freeing you.

Now, we should really scoot before we get caught again.

BTW, you owe me a manicure. I broke a claw getting that tacky collar off of you!

***Prrrrrrrrrrr****

***Mrowwww***

Follow me Stoopid Cat. I used my broken off claw to pick the lock. If we're careful we can probably make it to the Villa where we'll be safe. The we can get a message to Fat Cramer & Jinx and hold a Feline Forum (with plenty of fresh cream for everyone...Vee always has fresh cream available!)

We'll figure out what to do next in no time!

Let's go...

***Mrowww***

MINE Desk!!! Vat Happeneds to mine desk? Claw marks?

Oh Schnitzel! Der Cats has escaped... Spaced Renger Gonna be really Pissed dis time...

Hmmm, I hope the tracking devices I implanteded in the necks work... Maybe I Catches dem before Spaced fine out...

Sprock! What the hell happened here? Looks like those two cats got away from K. Nine. I knew we shouldn't have trusted that...

<locks Jinx in cat carrier>

Well, hopefully the tracking devices work... Yes!

SC is headed for the Security office, and K. Nine is already there waiting for him, Good. The other one is on the move too... looks like she's following SC. Well, K. Nine should be able to handle them... I need to find IT. And Soon!

Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(And once I have IT, all of them will Pay)

There's something suspicious about this place. I'm sure I heard a cat inside.

<focuses power and SHRinks door right off it's hinges>

Now, let's see what going on in here. No one seems to be around...

ARF! ARF ARF ARF!!!

FC??? What in the world have they done to you? Why are you barking?

And is that Jinx I see trapped in that Cat Carrier?

What in the hell is going on here!!!

I have had enough of this!!!!

<focuses power to SHRink lock on carrier until it shatters>

Come on Jinx, come on FC! I'm getting you two out of here! Then I'm going to find Space Ranger and put an end to this. Alt ID rights or not, he has no reason to trample your rights in the process.

<A careful observor might notice Jinx's eyes glowing as Vee carries him and Fat Cramer away. The next person to enter the office will notice that all the paintings have fallen from the walls, and pretty much everything easily breakable is broken.>