Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum LMB Constitutional Convention

<resists urge to say what he's dying to day>

Good!

Hmmph. Boys.

Aw...<arm around Cali>...we're not all *that* bad.

<peck on the cheek>

Now, back to petting my favorite feline Queen...

?

SHREEEEEEEEEK!

To the army of intelligent animals invading this convention. We are prepared to offer pets (super and not super) rights equal to the humans of this board.

In exchange you must support the Three Points of the Evil Genius Caste.

If you act now we will even consider a constitutional clause banning animal testing and requiring the use of "human" posters for our twisted experiments. (Outdoor Miner's status will be determined upon ratification.)

!Ay Caramba!

Something else else tells me it's going to be an interesting week around here.

Incidentally, I'm not prepared to support any initiative which bans Outdoor Miner of full sentient status.

I will offer this on the Miner issue.

O. Miner himself, would elect whether he wants to be an animal and be free from scientific testing or a human and thus a member of the subject pool.

Prrrrrrrrrr!!!!

I LIKE her too!

Mroowwwwww! ***

Stop the presses! We have a calamity on our hands! Search parties are being formed as we speak so hurry outside to receive your assignments!

The people of Greg Evigan Island are willing to offer Outdoor Miner sanctuary against any who would deny him his rights, as well as full membership in the Legion of Calamity-Pets.

Drunken Debauchery for all (would-be) sentients.

I'd like to state now that I stand by Outdoor Miner and he has my support on any issues involving him.

I also think a clause should be added that any organic being that can consume 94.5 tons of alcohol in one full Galactic year should also be awarded sentient status.

I object, on the basis that any organic being, having consumed 94.5 tons of alcohol in one full Galactic year would, even if they had been sentient, no longer be sentient by the end of it!

Hm...surely we can scour the universe and find such a being? I think this should be the first mission of the LMB after the constitution is written and proper leadership has been decided.

The only possible way such a being could exist is if the alcohol passes straight through their system, as water does in humans, without being chemically changed in the process. Thus, they would not "consume" the alcohol, merely tie it up for a short time.

And, on top of that, 94.5 TONS? They'd need to be a giant with a bad sweat problem

Why? Is he supposed to be intimidating or something?

(rolls up news paper and smacks him on the head)

Keep the ding-dong in it's tin foil, Cobaltus!

There should be something in this Constitution about not stealing cat's bowls of cream and balls of yarn, or anything else they may enjoy!

Psssst Luna *Off-the-Record*

I agree, on the kitty's rights proposals, but I can not negotiate them until I get the three minimum points for my constituents.


Pssst *Cobalt Kid* Off-the-Record

I am willing to give the Office of Security near dictatorial powers to persecu... I mean prosecute criminals, as you see fit. However I need my three points.


Pssst...
Beasts of England, Beasts of Ireland.
Beasts of Every land and clime,
Hearken to my joyful tidings
Of a golden future time.

You've heard my proposal but suffice it to say there will be more where that came from but not until the convention adopts the 3 points.

Oh Cobie... <smacks bum> ...who said I was complaining?

And, as always, Luna is my hero.

Meeeerooowwwww???? ***

Silly man, why would we wish to give up our superior position. We are not the pets here. You are! At least my pet, the cutie you refer to as Vee, gets that and understands his place in society. I can see that you are more feeble minded than the average human here since you don't appear to undertsand this simple fact of nature.

It's very obvious that you were never properly trained by a worthy feline or you wouldn't be so delusional.

Imagine that! Asking us to accept humans as our equals. Hrrmmmph!

The exact language of the recognition of your superiority is still up for negotiation if you accept my proposal. However our position is that recognition of the superiority of domestic animals, would be in the Preamble as opposed to an interpretive clause in the body of the Constitution.

Thank you, comrades. Your support means a lot to me.

Ah Miner I need to speak to you about certain proposals.