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Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 713
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 713 |
If you feel socially accepted and perky, this isn't the thread for you. If however your circumstances leave you feeling isolated and outcast from everywhere but this message board, actually you are not alone. It's been four years that Scott and I have increasingly taken over responsibility for my parents. Now with them moving in with us, we have effectively cut ourselves off from the rest of the world. It's a really strange and creepy realization. Even my brother won't come over at Christmas to see the new house because sick old people cramp his style. (My folks, not Scott and I----yet)
We will be sitting here pretty much going crazy during this 'festive' time, so anyone who wants to whine or vent frustration, or just know someone cares if you are depressed, let it out baby. I'll be close by my computer or laptop, like usual, because this is my only social outlet.
I confess, I have been a bitch all weekend, and have snapped at poor Scott when he didn't deserve it. It's not his fault we have come to this, and he does anything and everything he can to make things good for me. This is our first Christmas with them being so totally helpless and dependent. It gets so frustrating sometimes. I'm just whining because I miss the parties, and I miss just cuddling with Scott or going out on 'date nights' and spur of the moment 'couple time.'
Anyway, don't mean to be a total downer... Will try to find the humor, and the beautiful moments as well......
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981 |
Cheer up, Saturn Girl, you still have us Legion Worlders! Um, okay, well maybe that's not much... but it's better than nothing! Don't worry, things have a way of turning out for the best. Just go ahead and say what you want, we'll be listening.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 713
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 713 |
Thanks I.B., this board and my online Legion and other games are my source of friendship and creativity. If Scott hadn't said, c'mon, just give it a try, I'd be lost now. You are all just wonderful, and the chance to laugh, cry, joke and be silly really helps.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981 |
It sure is a lot of fun to go wild here! I got the same problem during the holidays, since I don't know any of the neighbors and all my friends all live far away. The Internet sure can be a blessing. Who knows, maybe we can have our very own LMBP Christmas party right here!
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,699
Leader
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Leader
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 2,699 |
You have your parents, at least, Caroline. I'm glad for you.
It can be a trial -- I know that well, from having handled matters at a distance over five years for my own, as my mother declined in fighting cancer. The last year, after my father had died, I was with her up close and mostly under her own roof.
I'm better off than many, not having lost my parents until I was 38. It still hurts at this time of year, though. No almond in the rice on Christmas eve. No lefse. No butterhorn rolls. Not much use for a tree, since my brother (we still have each other) and I don't exchange gifts. Our nearest family that gives a damn is 2500 miles away, in Cleveland.
We still have life on this fascinating planet, until politicos of all varieties get it blown up. I'm trying to focus on that. Not even watching the news, or as much of it, for a few days. I'm trying to preserve some illusions.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981 |
I guess all some of us need/want is a little companionship... And some friends who really care for us. At least we have Legion World.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,860
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,860 |
My father liked to say, "After 3 days, relatives are like old fish". And that's when everyone's in good shape.... I was four months living with my mother in her last stages of cancer and my fuses blew on a regular basis. It's very emotionally and physically draining, regardless of how well you ever got on together. One thing that annoyed me was that there was plenty of money to hire private nurses and caregivers, so that I could get away - but she really put up a fuss about "stangers" in the house --I got people in for the daytime anyways, just so I could get a break. I felt bad about it, but I was going down the drain myself otherwise. (My brother couldn't or wouldn't deal with it and my sister was permanently zoned out on prescription drugs - she was just another problem in the circus.)
We have few personal resources to deal with sickness and old age today - families are split up and usually one daughter winds up with the job. Dealing with doctors and hospitals is frustrating, even when staff are helpful and pleasant. It's just an awful business. So vent on, Caroline. There's a lot of anger along with the sorrow in these situations. There's some popular idea that we should be grateful for the time together - and you may well be, but there are also lots of negative feelings.
Holy Cats of Egypt!
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,978
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,978 |
Caroline, You and Scott are really warm caring people. I think a lot of us have forgotten just how emotionally draining it can be caring for parents and grandparents. After all most of our memories are of them being strong and caring for us. Having parents you are caring for is in many ways even more tying than having small children. The feelings of frustration you have, anger even, are, I think, the normal reaction of anyone to a situation like this. Please use this board and your cyber friends here to vent a little, to let out some of the anger and annoyance. That’s what we are here for. And take it from someone who has done it, venting on this board is a great way to get relief and support from some of the nicest people on the net. It’s true what they say, that the internet is making the world a smaller place. I might be half a world and god knows how many time zones away but I want you and Scott to know I’m thinking of you. I don’t know if we’ll ever meet in real life but until we do have a cyber hug from a faraway friend. I will raise a silent glass to you and yours on Christmas day. I hope it is as nice a day as it can be for you. You deserve it.
Darden
Faithfull
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,523
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 3,523 |
here's a big to you Caroline !!! and Scott !!! i hope you enjoy Christmas together, as much as you can !!! and as the other posters have said, you vent all you like to us on "LW" !!! Matthew
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,866
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,866 |
Ultra cutie beat me to it there with the offer of a hug for you both Caroline but you know that if you need one at all just close your eyes and I'm there giving you the best damn supportive hug I can.
Bxx
Legion Worlds NINE - wait, there's even more ongoing amazing adventures? Yup, and you'll only find them in the Bits o' Legionnaire Business Forum.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,617
Deputy
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Deputy
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,617 |
Big Hugs for you and Scott, Caroline... Your extremely excellent natures are well known even in the barren wilderness of OZ. If only we had a Caroline and Scott Down Under, I'm sure everything would be running more smoothly. And at least you're 'socially isolated' on account of being too nice, as opposed to not being nice enough. Aussie-Flavoured Happy Thoughts coming your way.... Now. Allow three to five days for delivery. PS Chances are I'll be sitting about alone on Christmas Day as well, waiting for family get-together on Boxing Day. At least I'll get some peace & quiet.
Wayne@OZ
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 9,843
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 9,843 |
Caroline, your parents are very lucky to have you and Scott in their lives. As is everyone here at LW.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,948
Don't Stop Peelieving
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Don't Stop Peelieving
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,948 |
Caroline! Not really feeling it this X-Mas; I would rather it was over already. Family isn't the source of seasonal joy it's been in years past. So I'm going over to Mom's on Christmas day, we'll exchange gifts, and I'll eat X-Mas dinner. Then I'll come home, sign on and hang out with whoever's around these parts!
"Anytime a good book like this is cancelled, I hope another Teen Titan is murdered." --Cobalt
"Anytime an awesome book like S6 is cancelled, I hope EVERY Titan is murdered." --Me
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,948
Don't Stop Peelieving
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Don't Stop Peelieving
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 12,948 |
whomever, pardon me...
"Anytime a good book like this is cancelled, I hope another Teen Titan is murdered." --Cobalt
"Anytime an awesome book like S6 is cancelled, I hope EVERY Titan is murdered." --Me
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981 |
Have a Merry Christmas, everyone, no matter how you choose to spend it.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,978
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,978 |
Caroline and Scott
Well its Boxing day and I have eaten and drank to much and done my fatherly duties and drove my parents around and now I'm knackered.
How you coping? I hope you two managed to find a little time for each other. If anyone deserves it its you lot.
Faithfull
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 17,274
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 17,274 |
Thanks Darden. We survived having to pick up Caroline's Dad and then take him back to the rehab center. Although we have been hit very heavily with a snow storm that is knocking out power all over the valley. So far we've been lucky and not lost ours.
Hope you did indeed have a great Boxing Day. Sounds like you've earned a rest.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 713
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OP
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Hi Darden!
Thanks for checking up on us cutie! Dad's been in the hospital but they let us bring him home for six hours on Christmas Day. Scott got a new digital camera and printer set up and took some pics and posted them on the pics of members thread. As much as I've been dreading having everyone see the real us, it's been fun and healing as well to share so much.
My brother dropped of his "guilt gifts" on the 23rd, which the best gift was for Mom to get to see her grandson Matthew. We haven't seen him in over a year. He turns 14 soon and he had really grown up a lot. Seems strange they live ten miles away but my brother doesn't want anything to do with us so we never see Matt.
We got dad back to the hospital before his curfew, and mom was just exhausted. But I think it was a very nice Christmas. Hope yours was as well. Overall we have a lot to be thankful for, mostly that we have wonderful friends and a support network here!
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 9,168
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 9,168 |
Hey Caroline, I'm glad it sounds like things picked up for you this holiday season. It was wise of you to come here and ask for support when you needed it -- good for you and thanks to you and Scott for always being a huge part of making this place the wonderfully homey place that it is!
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981
Unseen, not unheard
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Unseen, not unheard
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 84,981 |
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
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strange but not a stranger
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030 |
Saturn Girl,
I am glad you and Lightning Lad had a nice Christmas.
At times I feel hypocritical wishing people a happy holiday because I look forward to Jan 3rd (when the holidays are done and the day back at work when everyone asks "How was your holiday?" is also done)
Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 713
Active
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 713 |
Hi Quis! I know what you mean about going back to work and not having to hear about the plans for everyone's shopping and the parties and the trips.... Except after the holidays, you have to hear about how everything went wrong, and the waits in airport lines, and the fighting in the aisles at the stores (LOL)....
With the sudden and very heavy and long lasting snows we got starting the night of the 25th, this has definitely been our most quiet and isolated holiday season. Yet, it has turned out alright. We are thankful our power has only briefly went out and we never lost our heat. We've stayed in and kept off the roads and thus avoided accidents. Scott has dealt cards for hours and hours of poker games.
I have an awful lot to be thankful for, really.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,866
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,866 |
Poker? Can I spend Xmas at yours next year, and I'll bring Sonnie - he always loses so we'll make a big profit Glad you had a good Xmas there Caroline, you were in my prayers on Xmas Eve. Bxx
Legion Worlds NINE - wait, there's even more ongoing amazing adventures? Yup, and you'll only find them in the Bits o' Legionnaire Business Forum.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 17,274
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
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Posts: 17,274 |
You're welcome to bring Sonnie over for poker Binger. The more the merrier. We just ordered some special chips that are created like real casino chips to add to the fun.
I grew up in Nevada and the one game that I would play was the live poker games after work. I've been hooked on it since my Dad used to take me to his club in Phoenix every weekend.
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Re: Feeling socially isolated this holiday season?
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,866
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,866 |
Sounds great Scott! I'll try to persuade Alan and Sonnie they need to take me to the San Diego Con in July and you can teach us all how to play properly - we always end up disagreeing on rules and playing Indian Head Poker for dares instead.
Legion Worlds NINE - wait, there's even more ongoing amazing adventures? Yup, and you'll only find them in the Bits o' Legionnaire Business Forum.
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