Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Bits o' Legionnaire Business Klar Ken T5477’s Miscellanous Musings

PRELIMINARY:

The 33rd century Legion tales take place on “Earth-K”, a world in my head. The 21st-century history of Earth-K is most similar to the history of the “Young Justice” television series. Both Clark (Superman) Kent and Connor (Superboy) Kent spent time in the Legion at various points in their careers.

The Earth-K Legion was founded in 2957 by Imra Ardeen, Rokk Krinn, and Garth Ranzz, when they were aged 14. Their history generally unfolded along the lines of the revised chronology in “Five Years Later”—both Kid Quantum (the soul of Antares) and Laurel Gand were members of the Legion. The Batch SW6 Legion gradually evolved to resemble the “Earth-247” Legion, also known as “Legion 1.5”. The Batch SW6 Legion were ‘chrono-clones’, manifestations of quantum potentiality created by the cooperative efforts of the Dominion, as part of their plan to create super-powered being to conquer the United Planets and the Time Trapper, in his effort to overthrow Glorith.

There were certain dissimilarities between Batch SW6 and the “old” Legion, which made them easily identifiable as temporal anomalies. Projectra was a snake from a planet which did not exist. Star Boy was black, and the Xanthu of our universe unfamiliar to him. Saturn Girl was romantically involved with Cosmic Boy, not Garth. Catspaw, Dragonmage and Computo (Danielle Foccart) quickly joined the young Legion; eventually Kinetix, XS, Inferno (Sandy Anderson), Kid Quantum II (Jazmin is the daughter of James Cullen’s adoptive parents), Monstress, Shikari, Gear, and all the rest as well. The Batch SW6 Jan Arrah, over a trillion years in another dimension, evolved into the being known as the Progenitor.

“The Superman of 2964” was a popular holovid series, and one of the first to broadcast in “Empatho-D”, allowing the viewers to experience the physical sensations, if not the emotions, of the cast. Jon Feggo, a half-Daxamite, played “Klar Ken T5477”, the supposed descendant of Superman. His great-grand-daughter, Karalinda Zorelli, a one-sixteenth Daxamite, eventually joined the 33rd-century Legion of Super-Heroes as “Saturday Girl”.

The world of Kamandi existed alongside the Legion, in approximately the area of what is now Russia, which in the 30th century was a vast, radioactive wasteland, thought to be completely uninhabitable. (The inhabitants have re-named many areas after cities in the United States, for reasons lost to history)

With the destruction of the Earth in the early 2980’s, the Ani-Men, the adult Kamandi, Ben Boxer and much of the feral human population are all transplanted to Trom, as they are adapted to thrive only in a heavily radioactive environment. However, they colonize the opposite side of the planet from the small, devastated colony that had been Element Lad’s people.

The Legion of Substitute Heroes inherited the Citadel of Throon when the two old men who called it home eventually passed away. Outside the jurisdiction of the United Planets, they created a haven for super-powered outsiders and other refugees. By the 33rd century, they are known as “The Substitute Legion of Super-Heroes”, or SLSH. Outside the UP, they are known as “The Legion of Throon”. They set a lower standard, as far as power levels go, than the UP Legion, emphasizing training and passion.

It is the distant future.

The United Planets has been at peace for decades. The Khundish worlds were granted U.P. membership a half-century ago, and new worlds are added regularly.

Three of the most recent admissions are of mostly Terran origin.

Goodall is a world colonized by the descendants of Earth’s Gorilla City nearly a millennium ago. With Terran’s greater acceptance of alien lifeforms, Goodall has accepted membership in the United Planets.

New Hellas is a world until recently just outside U.P. space, and has been in disrepute for some time. Colonized by blonde, blue-eyed Terrans, they attempted through terra-forming and gene-splicing techniques to re-create a pseudo-mythical Greece. Here now dwell intelligent races of Manticores, Cyclopes, and Centaurs, as well as the original human inhabitants.
Although the scientists of New Hellas have not abandoned their experiments in human genetic manipulation, they have been provisionally admitted to the United Planets, which has eased the ban on human recombinants, so long as such experiments are supervised by UPGov, and confined to New Hellas proper.
The government of New Hellas is divided among small, local city-states (the largest being Zeusopolis and Neosparta) with representatives of each state participating in a co-coordinating Planetary Senate.

Superboy Planet was created in the 20th century by time-travelers who wished to honor the legendary hero. Unfortunately, the artificial world proved atomically unstable. In the 30th century, the Superboy Planet was repaired, renewed, and terraformed, and came to be colonized by those who felt some connection to the Man of Steel or ancient Krypton. Nearly all the colonists have taken new names based on the Superman mythos, such as Ken Van, Vers Var, Danvers El, Clark Kal, Kon-El Kara, and Laral Lee.


As our story begins, the Legion is celebrating a marriage of Kid Kappa and Naiad, two water-based soon-to-be-former members.

(1) Kid Kappa (Hayao Yamaguchi) is a Japanese mutant, with a turtle-like appearance. He is acclimated to life both in the water, and on land. He has super-strength, as long as his skin remains damp.

(2) Naiad (Mae Boeoa) is from the alien water-world of Neriad, a gilled, turquoise-skinned humanoid. With low-level telepathy, her powers are similar to old 20th-century Terran Atlanteans. (that is, she talks to fish)

With the marriage and departure of these two heroes, Pandora of Colu also announces her intention to retire from the Legion. After this announcement, Ghost Girl declares it is time for her to go as well, and disappears as mysteriously as she came.

(3) Pandora (Aylza Lydyl of Colu) is a Coluan of ordinary 10th-level intelligence, but has applied her intellectual gifts toward personal self-improvement. She has developed a moderate level of telepathy, both mind-reading and thought-casting, and has developed as well telekinetic powers: levitation, pyrokinesis, and psychoglaciation. She has also honed her personal charisma and powers of persuasion. She is also a skilled martial artist, with mastery of a dozen styles from a half-dozen worlds. The name Pandora, by the way, means “all gifts”.

(4) Ghost Girl is something of a mystery to the Legion and its 33RD–century fans. Permanently intangible, and somewhat unpredictable, it is thought by some that she is an actual ghost. Costumed in an old, ragged dress, she certainly looks the part. The truth is far stranger. She is actually an unconscious psychic projection of Pandora, an ability she is unaware that she possesses. Anyone Pandora has come in personal contact with “believes” in the existence of Ghost Girl. In fact, on occasion, the “belief” in Ghost Girl has been transmitted by another degree of separation—like a telepathic “virus”, being passed by one believer to another, without Pandora being present. However, with Aylza’s return to Colu, the viral presence of Ghost Girl in the minds of all her hosts has vanished.

Now the only active Legionnaires left are:

(5) Caduceus (Nikolas Hermes of New Hellas) A product of New Hellas’ genetic modification program, he has the power to heal others of nearly any non-fatal injury or illness. However, following the New Hellan version of the Reformed Hypocratic Oath, he cannot do so unless (a) he receives appropriate and reasonable monetary compensation, or (b) it is in his personal interest to do so. Arrogant and self-centered, with a very high opinion of his abilities, he is something of a jerk, but has a real longing for the days when “heroes” were HEROES and the Legion really stood for something. He carries a 2-meter staff of gold-plated osmium, topped with the entwined serpentine symbol from which he takes his name. (it weighs about sixty pounds) He is able to focus and amplify his healing powers through this staff (otherwise, it is necessary for him to touch his “patient”). He has also been trained in the offensive use of the quarterstaff / bo by Pandora, and is so skilled he can use it as a shield against many attacks.


(6) Jill Frost (Gillian Memmold of Thaar) is a Thaarian psychoglaciatic. Serious and taciturn, to the point of being grim, she also longs for the days when the Legion of Super-Heroes was a real Legion of Super-Heroes.


















(7) Tin Soldier was a gift to the Legion from the robot-makers of Rossum. Originally designed as a kind of automatic ice cream vending machine, or robotic “soda jerk”, it is vastly overbuilt, with 6th-level sentience, and an inertron body. Recently, when the roster of active, living members grew sparse, it was inducted into the Legion. Virtually useless in battle, it follows Asimov’s Laws of Robotics, the first being: “No Robot may harm a Sentient Being, or, through inaction, allow a Sentient Being to come to harm.” It does, however, fill out the group at public appearances.


(8) S.E.P. Kid (Dobee Lommess of Myar) Myaran Alchemy granted him a “Somebody-Else’s-Problem-Field”, which he continually generates, and has no control over. This makes him something of the opposite of Ghost Girl, who is visible to those present, but invisible on holovid. S.E.P Lad is perfectly visible and audible on holovid, but unnoticed by those he walks among. Add to that an irreverent sense of humor, and S.E.P. Lad is a great favorite among LSH holovid fans.





















(9) Flint is a tragic story. Caduceus, on Earth, in one of the Legion’s many public appearances, acquired a three-thousand-year-old flint arrowhead. Using his access as Legion Leader to the LSHQ mainframe, Caduceus entered the arrowhead as a full-fledged Legion member—and then could not figure out how to delete the file. In an effort to cover his tracks, he sent the mysterious “Flint” into the past, on a “top-secret mission”, the nature of which he has refused to divulge to anyone. Although technically within his rights at the time as Legion Leader to approve both new membership and such missions, this is a continuing source of friction between Caduceus and the Legion’s “Adult Advisors”, who have tightened up on Legion supervision. In order to cover his tracks, it is now not enough to merely delete “Flint’s” membership record—Caduceus must somehow come up with a complete, plausible cover story for the whole affair.

This is an example of the sort of villain the LSH has been allowed to confront lately.

"Professor Impkin" is a failed student and renegade from the Sorcerer's World who stole two powerful magical items when he left. The first is merely a Shadow Hood, which keeps his face in shadow. The second is an imp from some fifth-dimensional netherworld, who bears a remarkable resemblence to Li'l Hot Stuff, the li'l Devil.

Professor Impkin's power and control over the imp is twofold: he has severed one of the imp's fingers, and wears it in an amulet around his neck: an ordinary sort of charm. Furthermore, he knows the imp's true name: Nwlymffftgzdkwyyh. (Newell for short) Each time he speaks the imp's name backwards, he is granted a single wish.

The imp, however, requires specific and unambiguous direction, and is by nature stubborn and perverse. Prof. Impkin himself is also, unfortunately, impatient and unimaginative, so that, while theoretically having access to nearly unlimited power, he is something of a screw-up.

In their first encounter with Professor Impkin, Jill Frost was able to temporarily incapacitate the imp, who has an antipathy to cold. Professor Impkin, however, escaped.

In their second encounter, Pandora had learned enough magic to create a djinn-bottle, and the imp was captured, and placed out of Professor Impkin's control. Impkin was taken into custody on Planet Bethlehem, a world dedicated to the psychological rehabilitation of criminals.

In their third encounter, Professor Impkin broke into Legion Headquarters itself, to recover the imp bottle, hoping to free the imp. Pandora had lined up three identical bottles in the Legion Museum, above a riddle which read:

The middle bottle does not contain the imp.
The bottled imp sits next to an empty bottle.
Exactly one of these three statements is false.

The riddle was a red herring: none of the three bottles contained the djinn-bottle, which was inside a silver-and-iron filigree box on another shelf. The three other bottles contained a powerful general anesthetic gas.

In their fourth encounter, Professor Impkin actually recovered the imp, and had set himself up as the ruler of his own planet. His 'subjects' were magically-created rock-people. As the Legion fought through the pebbly hordes toward the Professor's throne, Caduceus was in the lead.

Professor Impkin: Hy-yw-kdz-gt-ff-f-my-lwn! I wish you to kill the Legionnaire Caduceus!

Imp Newell: I'm not sure how to do that, boss.

Professor Impkin: Oh, just... I don't know... just transform his body into a dead corpse!

Imp Newell: OK, boss.

Professor Impkin: Well?

Imp Newell: Waiting for the magic word, boss.

Professor Impkin: But I just... Oh, very well. Hy-yw-kdz-gt-ff-f-my-lwn!

[Caduceus body withers away. The staff drops from his hand. But standing in its place is a glowing, silvery apparition.]

Professor Impkin: What in the worlds is that?

Imp Newell: Well, I didn't know what to do with his soul.

[Caduceus' soul now re-enters his corpselike body, and using his powers to their utmost, he heals himself.]

Professor Impkin: Oh, I need some time to think. Hy-yw-kdz-gt-ff-f-my-lwn! Get us out of here!

[Professor Impkin, his imp, and the entire Legion are teleported to Legion HQ]

Professor Impkin: The clubhouse? And... I meant just the two of us! Not the entire Legion as well!

Imp Newell: I keep telling you, boss, you need to be more specific!

Caduceus now uses his power to heal the imp's mutilated hand, thus freeing him from the Professor's influence. As his rescuer, Caduceus was entitled to a free wish. He asked the imp, however, what he wanted:

Imp Newell: You mean you're going to grant me a wish?

Caduceus: No promises, but I'd like to hear what you would like.

Imp Newell: Really? Well, what I'd really like is to go back into that bottle back at the Clubhouse. I've managed to make it pretty comfortable inside-- a lot more comfortable than that Netherworld I came from.

Caduceus: I think we can accomadate you.

Imp Newell: And if you guys ever need to confine a lady imp somewhere...

Caduceus: OK, now you're just being evil.

Caduceus does still have one wish coming from the imp Nwlymffftgzdkwyyh.

The Legion of Super-Heroes, Inc., is a wholly-own subsidiary of THC (The Holding Company), which produces the weekly LSH Reality holo-vid, and schedules publicity appearances for the Legion

Lieutenant Xyzkov is the Science Police Legion Liason, as well as Chief Adult Advisor to the Legion, and coordinates with THC, ICC, and the SP the “heroic” appearances of the Legion. His last name is pronounced “Shys Cough”.

With the departure of so many Legionnaires, it is decided that tryouts will be held, and the Legion ranks replenished. Traditionally, there have been only two new members a year admitted into the Legion ranks: either one male and one female, or one Terran and one non-humanoid. According to the UltraCorps Amendment, the ICC special ops team known as UltraCorps has first pick of any Legion applicant—meaning that nearly all really top-level candidates never become Legionnaires.

In this round, the following three individuals make it through to the Legion:

10) Saturday Girl (Karalinda Zorelli of Venus) The great-granddaughter of Jon Feggo, the half-Daxamite who starred in the popular holovid “The Superman of 2963”, she is one-sixteenth Daxamite. For about 160 hours, her cells charge with yellow solar energy, and she she is appears to be an ordinary Earth-Girl. But when she wakes up Saturday morning, she gains full Daxamite powers for ten hours. (Or, if she wakes up before sunrise, when the sun rises)






11) Herokalos (Herokalos Herculides) of New Hellas is the result of an intensive genetics project. He possesses “the strength of Herakles”. He is also a trisomy-23 mutant. (known colloquially in the 20th century as Downs Syndrome) He has approximately the intellectual capacity of a four-year old. This is the reason he was rejected by UltraCorp.
However, a computer chip implanted in his skull compensates somewhate for his reduced intellect. Functionally, with his “thinking-brain dog” operating, he has an I.Q. of 180.
Herokalos has the emotional openness, honesty and empathy characteristic of many trisomy-23 mutants. His TBD-chip also allows him to control his impulses to behave according to acceptable social mores.








13 Dimensio

{Otto Sellkey of Neptune) Two-dimensionality powers similar to Ron-Karr, although she has refined them through practice. For example, she has trained herself to turn her hand into a two-dimensional ‘knife’ of infinite sharpness.

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[The Legion Holovid Room: Caduceus, Jill Frost, S.E.P. Lad and Tin Soldier watching the current week's show]

S.E.P. Lad: "They certainly make Tryouts seem less chaotic and far more entertaining than they really are."

Jill Frost: "Did you say something, Nikk?"

Caduceus: "No, I but I was just thinking, they certainly make Tryouts seem far less chaotic and more entertaining than they really are."

[A youth in a black-and-white costume suddenly appears out of nowhere. Down the left sleeve is written the word, "INDOMITABLE"]

Indomitable Lad: "I am called Indomitable Lad of Myar, and I wish to join your Legion. No, just sit quietly, and I will explain myself."
[The Legionnaires appear unable to move.]
"I am sure you have heard of the legendary Legionnaires Nemesis Kid, Absorbancy Boy, and Duplicate Boy. I have the powers of each of them. Not only am I able to duplicate any super-ability, but I can also generate new powers which negate or nullify any super-ability."
"You Legionnaires have been wasting your time rescuing pets from trees and appearing at the opening of shopping malls. It is time you did something spectacular."
"By super-duplicating the ability of Cargggans..."
[Indomitable Lad splits into six separate beings.]
"Then by duplicating Durlan shape-shifting..."
[The four Legionnaires are now facing duplicates of themselves- plus Saturday Girl, and Indomitable Lad himself.]
"I know your rings record your all your activities for the Legion Show. In fact, we would be being recorded right now, had I not transported the LHQ two hundred million years into the past before I arrived! However, we will need them to record your next mission, so I will just borrow them..."
[Indomitable Lad reaches for their rings. Jill Frost, struggling against paralysis, manages to speak.]
Jill Frost: "You know you can't take our rings. They are bio-magnetically bonded to us. Even we can't remove them."
Indomitable Lad: "But when I can duplicate Bgztlr intangibility..."
[Indomitable Lad easily takes the three rings from the immobilized Legionnaires]
"And now I will return you to the present, and show you what the Legion of Super-Heroes should truly be like! I know there is a renegade band of Daxamite pirates hiding out on Murria, and I intend for the Legion to bring them to justice!"
[The holo-vid platform view shifts to Murria, where the faux-Legion is shown attacking a quartet of Daxamites.]

faux-Jill Frost: Taste absolute zero, pirate!
faux-Caduceus: And now, I will 'cure' you of your powers!
faus-Tin Soldier: No robot may harm a sentient being. [A hard right cross] Oh, excuse me. I didn't harm you, did I?
[One Daxamite trains his heat vision on the faux-Jill Frost, who immediately counters with an impenabtrable ice-shield. The faux-Saturday Girl takes him down with a single punch.]
Indomitable Lad: [crowing] "Long live the Legion!"
[Suddenly, Indomitable Lad seems to suffer a moment of vertigo. Then the faux-Tin Soldier's appearance flickers. He reverts back to Indomitable Lad. Then all five faux-Legionnaires revert back to Indomitable Lad's image, then vanish. Indomitable Lad drops to his hands and knees, in a near-faint. The four Daxamites stand up. The holovid goes dark.]

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Caduceus: "So that was a live feed? No editing?"
Tin Soldier: "Apparently, the so-called 'Indomitable Lad' arranged it so. The gossipwebs are abuzz with commentary on the feed."
Caduceus: "Have you received an answer from UltraCorps?"
Tin Soldier: "UltraCorps confirms that 'Indomitable Lad' applied to the ICC as an agent. However, his psych profile showed him to be unstable. His powers were also unstable, fading in the presence of excess hyper-bio-energetic radiation. He would have been particularly vulnerable in a group of super-powered beings such as UltraCorps, or against a group of Daxamites. He was apparently in denial over this handicap to his abilities."
Jill Frost: "Have we heard from the Murrians?"
Tin Soldier: "It is notoriously difficult to get information from the Murrian Embassy. They will not confirm if or if not 'Indomitable Lad' has survived. Considering his weakened state, and the opponents he faced, I believe we must assume he is deceased."
Caduceus: "The official line is that the Legion was not involved in this at all, and had no knowledge of the imposters. That is, in fact, very close to the truth. We are to continue with our regularly scheduled activities, which involve a scheduled tour of Legion Headquarters today for prominent off-Earth visitors."
"I will be leading the tour today."
S.E.P. Lad: "Tin Soldier, tell Nikk that I am scheduled to join him."
Tin Soldier: "Dobee is scheduled to join you on the tour as well."
Caduceus: "S.E.P. Lad? [Checks Omnicom] He is scheduled for the tour today... I'll let someone else worry about that."

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PASSWORD TO ADVENTURE

[Caduceus and S.E.P. Kid are leading an LSHQ guided tour. The tourist group is pretty usual. A number of humanoids, probably including Winathans, Braaliens and Cargggans, a Xudaran family, a trio of Durlans, a Hykraian, and a couple of elderly green men. Tin Soldier enters abruptly]

Tin Soldier: "Caduceus, I have a message for you from The Holding Company. Your flight ring is malfunctioning. They have twice lost the signal during this tour. I am to take your place on the tour; you are to return to the laboratory for analysis and maintenance of your ring."

Caduceus: [grins] "They probably think I managed to sabatoge it myself. If only."

[He sets of down the hall, away from the group. He suddenly realizes that one of the green men has followed him.]

Caduceus: "I'm sorry, sir. You will need to return to the tour group."

Coluan: "Oh but I am still with the group, you see? [gestures back toward Tin Soldier and S.E.P. Kid. He is indeed still with his companion] This is merely a... to use an old Terran word... telepresence."

Caduceus: “You are projecting some sort of hologram? Why...?”

Coluan: “Actually, a cohesive quantum eigenmorphic projection. I just want to ask you a question in private: this debacle with 'Indomitable Lad'-- how do you honestly feel about it?"

Caduceus: “Are you some sort of reporter?”

Coluan: “That is a good description. I have been in the information business a long time. And now I am looking for an ‘exclusive’ from you.”

Caduceus: “Legion flight rings immediately broadcast anything we say, see, or hear... even feel. It is impossible to get anything ‘exclusive’ before The Holding Company sees it. If they want it in the show, it will be out there for everyone to see tomorrow.”

Coluan [smiles]: “But I understand your flight ring is malfunctioning. Humour an old man. Look into my eyes.”

[Caduceus sees something deep within the old man’s gold-and-green eyes. He is not sure what it is, but he somehow trusts this man.]

Coluan: “Tell me about Indomitable Lad.”

Caduceus: "Of course, it was a tragedy-- but the boy was mentally ill."

Coluan: "And how did you feel watching 'yourself' die?"

Caduceus: "I... Look, I'm don't have the kind of power that Myaran displayed... I can't 'heal' someone of Daxamite powers, any more than Gillian could produce those absolute zero temperatures, or Tin Soldier can cold-cock a sentient being. But... look, I when I originally signed up... I mean, the Legion used to mean something... I thought we might be able to do some good. But it seems we're blocked now at every turn."

Coluan [to himself]: "And now they use my old inventions to make sure your leashes are short and unbreakable...
[to Caduceus]
“These buildings: did you know that Legion HQ and the Legion Clubhouse were originally one and the same? And some things here seem to be missing. Where is the Laboratory, the Training Room, the Gymnasium, the Anti-Gravity Pool? The Legion Cruisers are docked at the space-port, and with a time-bubble not to be seen. The Legion Museum used to take up entire rooms, and the Armory was home to some of the most useful weapons in the Galaxy.”

Caduceus: “Yes, I know history. Can you believe that anyone would trust a group of teen-agers with that kind of power and responsibility?”

[The Coluan studies Caduceus for a moment.]

Coluan: “Have you ever wondered about these intaglios?”

[The Coluan indicates an small, round, indentation in the wall, with an reversed 'L' embossed into it.]

Caduceus: "I’ve seen them, sure. I live here almost twenty-four hours a day. There are decorations all over the walls, but... Wait! What are you doing?"

[The old man is surprisingly strong. In a single smooth motion, he grabs Caduceus’ ring-hand, and presses his ring against the tiny intaglio. A holographic keyboard appears in the air.]

Coluan: "No one in the U.P. could have disentangled my security protocols from the flight ring's structure, no matter how they re-designed it. That's the problem with Terran reverse-engineering. It's always safer designing from the ground up."
"This one opens the training room. The password is, 'ADVENTURE'."

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Caduceus, S.E.P. Lad, Jill Frost, Tin Soldier, Dimensio, Saturday Girl and Kalos are gathered in the Training Room.

Caduceus: "All right, Legionnaires. Some of you are pretty new. But you have sworn an oath, and we want you to take it seriously now, because we are taking it seriously."
"There have been Legion traitors in the past. They were dealt with. But we will trust you, now, until you show us otherwise."
“Our flight ring communication to the outside is disabled in here. You have seen the Training Room. If you don’t want to see more, then leave the Legion right now.”
“Gillian, you’re with me, I know. Tin Soldier—well, there is no question of your loyalty. It’s programmed. Herokalos?”

Herokalos: [pauses] “Long Live The Legion!”

Caduceus: [smiles] “Saturday Girl?”

Saturday Girl: “Long Live The Legion!”

Caduceus: “Dimensio? I know the peer pressure in this room is awful. But we honestly won’t think less of you if you want to leave. This is declaring our independence from The Holding Company.”

Dimensio: “Then this is Independence Day. Long Live The Legion!”

Caduceus: "You know what tessaract storage is: put a clock into a tessaract, and when you open it again, no time will have passed. This room is an anti-tessaract: once you close the door, provided there is someone wearing a flight ring inside, no time will pass outside this room. You could be in here for hours, and no one would know on the outside. There are failsafes: the door opens automatically after six hours, otherwise, an eternity could pass without anyone outside knowing it."
“There are other anti-tessaract rooms as well. Each is accessed by a flight ring, and has its own password.”
"Use them while you can. As you know, outside these rooms we are under constant surveillance, and can probably only keep this from the producers and The Holding Company for a short while."
"Perhaps we can make them see that there is benefit turning the Legion into something more than it is now."

All: "Long Live the Legion!"

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[A smoke-filled room, somewhere in the United Planets]

Lieutenant Xyzkov: "Your flight ring's signal has been blacked out. Tell me what you think I need to know."

Dimensio: "I want the ring completely off. I want out of the Legion. I saw myself die on Murria, and these fools want to re-create that fiasco."

Lieutenant Xyzkov: "Don't be absurd. They are continuously monitored. The UltraCorp Initiative allows THC or the ICC to pull any member who appears too powerful, or too reckless. They have neither the opportunity, nor the method to become independent, even if they think they have a motive."

Dimensio: "They have found a way to circumvent the flight ring monitors. They have been contacted by Paradox! Have you looked at the holovid from the tour?"

Lieutenant Xyzkov: "Dox hasn't been heard from for years. He would be ancient now, even for a Coluan. Those two men on the tours were not even from Colu. Our bio-sensors reveal they were merely Sklarian eunuchs. Really, it should have been obvious to anyone at all acquainted with exobiology. Coluans have deep green complexions. Sklarians are more of a chartreuse."
“You are believing fairy-tales."

Dimensio: "Say what you like, I know what I saw, Xyzkov, and I know what's going on at the Clubhouse, out of your sight, but right under your nose. I'm willing to give you the passwords, everything. But I want the credits up front, a new identity, and I want to be off-world, somewhere out on the frontier when you confront them. I don't trust the Legion, or THC, or the ICC or UltraCorps."

Lieutenant Xyzkov: "Who do you think we are, girl? 1Oth-century Assassins? We are businessmen.”
“Here is what we will do: we are going to make of it a TV Special. What is in the mysterious vaults at Legion Headquarters?
“You would do better to trust us, and take a percentage of the gross, rather than a few measly mega-credits upfront."

Dimensio: "I have big ears, Xyzkov. And there are a few people who know how to keep their mouths shut... as long as I'm still alive."
“Let me say three more words: Project Red Warlock."

Lieutenant Xyzkov: "Really, Miss Selkey, let us end this before you write the Great Neptunian Novel, three words at a time. You will be given one-half of your original request. You will have thirty days to establish yourself in your new life. Then we will take care of the Legion and their 'anti-tessaract' vaults."

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Announcer: "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the first night of the Legion of Super-Heroes Special, 'What is in the Legion Headquarter's Secret Vaults?' And here is your host, award-winning journalist, Alphonse Gabriel!"

[The six Legionnaires are gathered in a semi-circle, surrounding Alphonse Gabriel and his co-host. They are facing the wall which conceals the Training Room.]

Gabriel: "Ladies and Gentlemen, tonight we are opening the first of six secret tessaracts, located throughout Legion Headquarters. This information was provided to us by one of the newest Legion recruits, Dimensio of Neptune.
"He left us his Legion Flight Ring, the passkey to the Vaults. And now, the lovely Vana of Venus is inserting the ring into the hidden keyhole..."
[An Interlac keyboard slides open within the wall]
"And I understand, Vana, the password for this room is 'ADVENTURE'"

Gabriel: "What are we looking at, ladies and gentlemen? There is indeed a tessaract vault hidden withing the dimensions of the clubhouse. And what a vault it is! Gowns, dresses, shoes, hats, purses... even some jewelry. Certainly costume jewelry...
"But who did they once belong to? Shrinking Violet? Dream Girl? The Wolf Princess of Orando? Star Sapphire? Or perhaps Zoe Saugin?"

S.E.P. Lad: "No, Alphonse, they all belong to me. All of it belongs to me."

Gabriel: "I am getting a message from our off-site producer... S.E.P. Lad? Really? Well, you heard it yourself, ladies and gentlemen. This Legionnaire is quite the collector... Still, not my problem, I suppose."

[Later]

[Lieutenant Xyzkov is interviewing Caduceus]

Lieutenant Xyzkov: "Honestly, we don't begrudge you all wanting some time off the clock. But you really should have contacted us when you discovered those vaults. The fourth one: the Legion Armory-- there could have been dangerous weapons in there. Fortunately what we found were only mockup and replicas.

But we will turn the rings off for six hours a day. But remember-- that means no flight, and no internal communications for you as well. Don't be walking on the ceiling at 2159, if the ring is scheduled to be turned off at 2200. Frankly, I was never had much use for the Holding Company's idea of 24-hour monitoring anyway. Never got anything out of it but footage of you kids snorint."
"Remember that Legion Leader Elections are coming up soon: I'm not saying this will influence your chances, but the masses are notoriously fickle. And, of course, you have new recruits, too. The Audience does like to see a freshman struggling with command. Now, any questions, son?”

Caduceus: "Lieutenant, I appreciate your candor. I understand that this assignment as the designated representative to the Holding Company, and the Legion, was is not what you expected when you signed up with the Interstellar Intelligence Corps. You couldn't be fairer or more reasonable...”

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Next: THE COURAGE OF ACHILLES

I have posted this before, but it seems a good point in this arc to post it again. This is a rundown of the surviving Legionnaires on Earth-K circa 3257.

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Brainiac 5
The original Querl Dox, originally known as Brainiac 5, and the Batch SW6 Querl Dox, later known as Brainiac 5.1, eventually formed a partnership. Known both collectively and individually as Paradox, they may also addressed as Professor Dox. Sometimes they are known as The Doctors.

In the year 3257, one is just over three hundred years old, the other just under three hundred years old. Time had made them virtually indistinguishable.

The younger Dox married Jasmine Cullen, Kid Quantum II, back in the 31st century. They lived together happily until her death in the same century. They had two children: their daughter became known as the original Pandora, blending her mother’s control of quantum constants with ordinary 10th-level Coluan intellect. Their son, Lutwidge Dox, applied his intellectual gifts to music, art, poetry and philosophy, disciplines which some are surprised to find are well-respected on his homeworld. Both are still extant on Colu, only two or three decades younger than their father. Some of Lutwidge’s early stage-plays are still performed regularly throughout the United Planets.

The elder Dox never married; he had, in fact, few deeply intimate relationships after the disbanding of the Legion. Mournful, solemn and taciturn, the natural good humour of his youth never returned until he became part of the Paradox team. While both were gifted in technological innovation, it was the younger Dox who was able to make their inventions more user-friendly to the Universe at large.

Although they once held innumerable patents over the years, copyright expires quickly on Colu, as there is a deeply-held belief in the freedom of information and innovation. Still, they probably have a half-dozen patents outstanding at any one time.

The two Querls separately and together, frequently came to the aid of their old Legion compatriots in those early, Post-Legion days: eventually curing Graym Ranzz of mind-fever (and in the process creating the android Legionnaire Veritas), assisting Mon-El and Shadow Lass with infertility problems, and later in stabilizing Lar Gand’s personal Phantom Zone portal. They eventually found a way to reverse Jeka’s Hypertaxis, and rescued Zoe Saugin from an interdimensional limbo. They fashioned new and better containment modules for Wildfire, assisted in ridding Duplicate Woman of the unwanted and dangerous side-effects of her runaway powers, and designed The Weirdo Legionnaire’s “Splitting Ray” weapon, powered by his own excess hyper-bio-energy.

Unknown to much of the Galaxy, was their direction of subtle intelligence work effecting the political containment of the Dominion, keeping the United Planets and Khundish Empire—and even the Dark Circle—mostly free of Dominator influences for over two centuries.

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Mordru & Blok
Mysa Nal, also known as Zola Aq, The Hag, The White Witch, The Black Witch, Jewel, White Amethyst, The Occultress, Guinevere the Gray, The White Wizardess, and Madame Kashaph, had a long and varied magical history, education, and career.

In the final battle between Mysa and Mordru, the near-immortal half-demon faced off against the Orakills of Orando, led by the elderly, frail, and severely weakened (once-again) White Witch. (Although Mordru mockingly called her “The Hag”.)

Mordru delivered the killing blow to his century-old adversary, but Mysa responded with a last desperate spell, especially crafted for this confrontation. She exchanged souls with Mordru.

Trapped in the body of the dying witch, Mordru’s life was extinguished by his own spell, and his human half-soul followed his demon component down to the underworld.

Mysa’s soul now resides within the millennia-old body of Mordru.

By the 33rd century, Mysa has taken Mordru’s name, and rules the Sorcerer’s World with the title of Arch-Chancellor, as the world has been re-imagined as a school of magic.

After Blok’s death at the hands of the madman *, his head eventually metamorphosed into an egg, from which hatched his parthenogenetic offspring, Chip. Retaining much of Blok’s original personality and memories, Chip was raised by the Batch SW6/Reboot Legion (which are one and the same on Earth-K), even fighting beside them at the tender age of two, when he was only a meter tall, and a scant two hundred pounds.

As an adult, he eventually returned to the Sorceror’s World, renewing his relationship with Mysa. The relationship continued into Mysa’s dotage, and persisted through and beyond her transformation into Mordru.

Blok now resides on Korlon-Dryad, and is the Executor, Chief Operating Officer and sole shareholder of the Korlon-Dryad Restoration Trust, Inc., whose assets include the entire ruined planet. He and Mysa discovered decades ago that the cataclysmic stellar nova that destroyed Dryad was not an isolated event: Dryad’s primary goes nova every few thousand years, but the massively destructive energy-burst only causes Blok’s race to go into hibernation, many carrying the seeds of organic life within their bodies. There is always a ‘surviving’ rock-Dryad, who re-awakens his race, who then re-seed and re-grow the planet’s organic life. Blok, with the help of other interested parties among the United Planets, is terraforming Korlon-Dryad, purifying the atmosphere and the oceans, tilling and fertilizing the soil, in preparation for the great re-awakening, which is expected to occur sometime in the early 34th century.

Mordru/Mysa presents the aspect of a twelve-foot-tall grey-bearded giant humanoid.

Blok is of a similar size, although broader and more massive, with visible, smoking volcano-like structures as part of his physiology.

On occasion, Blok and Mordru have temporarily assumed different aspects though magical means, at sometimes even masquerading as an elderly, distinguished-looking human couple. The genders they each assume are as fluid as their appearances.

During the late 33rd century, sometime after Mysa had assumed Mordru’s form, both expended some sustained time and effort—about twenty years—to produce and raise a child. This is Argenius, the Silver Sorcerer of Tharn, who has a natural elvish appearance. Extraordinarily powerful, his only real limitation is that he can perform only Pure White Magicks; that is, he can only perform magic which harms no living thing, but is only to their benefit. In order to retain his powers, he must also scrupulously avoid harming living creatures through mundane means as well: he is a vegetarian, and even then must be careful that what he consumes does not injure the parent organism too seriously. Of course, his body must fight off infection, but he does his best to remain healthy to begin with, and never uses antibiotics or other medical intrusions, but only recovers naturally with his own defenses.

At present, Blok and Mordru are engaged in very different pursuits on worlds separated by interstellar distances. However, because of the ease of communication and transportation by both technological and magical means, they are as close as ever.

As they both expect to live at least another thousand years or so, time has a different meaning to them.

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Lar Gand
The Batch SW6 Lar Gand (known as “Ve’Lar Gand”, or “the other Lar Gand” on Daxam, but as Valor throughout most of the rest of United Planets) eventually married CeCe Beck. The two are now / will be / living somewhere in the far future, although they left behind an adult daughter, who became known as the hero and Legionnaire Thunderbolt.

Active in both body and mind her whole life, and living to the age of one hundred and fifty, Thunderbolt nevertheless passed away over a hundred years ago, from the perspective of the year 3257.

The other Lar Gand had a long, rocky, and tumultuous relationship with Tasmia Mallor, the female Shadow Champion of Talok VIII. As a member of the ruling family of Talok, Tasmia was expected to produce rightful heirs; her inability to do so resulted in her brother Grev holding the throne through his line. The twelve children Tasmia and Lar eventually produced with the help of Coluan and Daxamite medical technology were deemed unnatural, ineligible and unworthy, specifically because they had been produced by technology. However, the ruling families could not resist the undeniable power of these “unnatural” Mallorans, and many of their children and grandchildren intermarried into the royal line.

Lar and Tasmia, meanwhile, divorced twice and re-married three times. He was her husband, and at her bedside, when she passed away. Having died himself a couple of times, he thought the loss would be manageable, but after Tasmia’s death, Lar developed a profound thanatophobia.

He decided that, if he could help it, he would never die again.

Lar Gand is currently the only resident of the Phantom Zone. The other surviving original Legionnaires have devices with which they may contact him, if necessary.

He has also created another identity: Robert Cobb, elderly, eccentric multi-trillionaire, founder and majority stockholder of Cobb’s Brush and Reparo. Originally a manufacturing company producing cleaning supplies, the corporation expanded into trash collection and recycling, then expanded further as a high-tech fix-it shop, then added cleanup services for polluted construction sites, up to and including the cleanup of whole worlds, and finally, as a semi-surreptitious sideline, the cleanup of criminal organizations, gangs, unwanted para-military organizations, terrorism, political scandals, personal reputations, and just about anything else that needs fixing.

The corporate offices of Cobb’s Brush and Reparo are located in Orionhead City on Meissa 2. In addition to being a fantastically profitable business enterprise in and of itself, the company is a partner in numerous other profitable corporations, through its investment arm, CBR Ventures.

Mr. Cobb is known to be intimately involved in the workings of CBR and CBRV, and to have contacts throughout the galaxy. His ability to ferret out and act on information known to no one else is legendary, as is his mysteriously reclusive nature. Mr. Cobb contacts his board of directors and CEO when he sees fit, and is seldom seen in public. It is said he has a private office and residence somewhere in or near Orionhead City, but no one knows exactly where it is.

A famous eccentric, Mr. Cobb almost invariably dresses plainly in a white dress shirt, black slacks and shoes, and a black string tie, centuries out of fashion.

Lar Gand himself, while he enjoys playing Mr. Cobb, exits the Phantom Zone, on average, for only about twenty-four hours each year. As his remaining life expectancy is something like ten or twenty years, this gives him a good thirty to seventy centuries to find a more permanent solution to the problem of death.

Exceptionally skilled in using his Daxamite powers, permanently immune to lead poisoning, acquainted with innumerable martial arts, and possessing the ability to move at will into and out of the Phantom Zone, the elderly Lar Gand is completely capable of taking out a dozen ordinary Daxamites in a fight. The unassuming Mr. Cobb is the epitome of Terry Pratchett’s Rule One: “Do not act incautiously when confronting a little, bald, wrinkly, smiling man.”

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Wildfire & Dawnstar
The Wildfire Collective formed over a period of years sometime in the late 31st and early 32nd centuries. It is a stable crystalline energy / anti-energy matrix, regulated by the communal mind(s) of Drake Burroughs (Wildfire), his cousin Randall Burroughs and Jahr Ningle (Feral Star), his brother Squire Burroughs (E.R.G.-2), and the Soul of Dawnstar. The other-dimensional being Quislet was never fully integrated with the Collective, but was associated with it for a number of years. Quislet’s current status and whereabouts in the 33rd century are unknown.

The Collective, at least parts of it, are technically thousands of years old. Drake Burroughs, for example, has been lost in time at least twice, finding his way back to the 30th or 31st century “the long way”. During these times, he was separated from Dawnstar for centuries at a time, who found her way back from time-lost status through more expeditious methods.

The Burroughs/Ningle communal mind was also once transported back in time to the 25th century, and so is about six hundred years older than its birth origin might make it appear.

During their time as separate entities, Wildfire and Dawnstar at one time inhabited two artificial life forms as “borrowed bodies”, and were legally the parents and guardians of the mid-31st century Legionnaire Goldenwing. By the 33rd century, Goldenwing’s descendants number in the tens of thousands, making the Wildfire Collective the most prolific of all the Legionnaires.

Capable of existing independently in a stable, although invisible, form, the Wildfire Collective prefers to masquerade as a computer mind, under the pseudonym Sachet using a squarish containment unit about a half-meter in volume as its residence, which it shares with a substantial amount of high-tech sensory and communications technology.

As such, it is capable of flight, energy and anti-energy projection, ordinary vocal communication, and can establish interfaces with virtually all known communication devices.

Entirely unique in the Universe, the Wildfire Collective nevertheless is aware of, and regularly visits, about a half-dozen extra-U.P. worlds inhabited by various other forms of energy-beings.

Even more than Mr. Cobb, it has a history as an explorer, and has vast knowledge and experience with the far reaches of the Galaxy.

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Cosmic Boy & Night Girl
Rokk Krinn and Lydda Jath-Krinn, once their family was raised, ventured off to explore the timestream. Unlike Valor and Thunder, however, their intention was clearly to explore both the futures and the pasts of many worlds.

There was the possibility that Rokk may ultimately turn out to be the version of the Time Trapper who defeated Glorith. (There is only one Time Trapper, and yet there are many Time Trappers. Blame quantum.)

Where in time Krinns have visited are for the most part unknown. What is known is that they attended the funeral of Lightning Lad. In fact, three different versions of them were there, from three obviously different points in their timeline. One couple was far past middle-age.

The Batch SW6 Cosmic Boy, of course, married the Batch SW6 Saturn Girl, one of their daughters being the powerful Legionnaire FalconFire.

The Batch SW6 LiveWire, a less stable personality, married the Batch SW6 Triad, which lasted about seven years. Later, he married (in succession) a couple of native Winathan sisters.

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[Conversation between Herokalos Herculides (Kalos for short) and the Tin Soldier (formerly known as Ice Cream Boy)]

Kalos: "So, Tin Soldier-- can I call you Tin?-- you make this ice cream..."

Tin Soldier: "It is my Primary Function. I am always ready to produce a frozen confection for those who ask it of me."

Kalos: "Wait, really? Ice cream on demand? 24/7"

Tin Soldier: "While I am your team-mate, yes."

Kalos: "How about a classic banana split?"

[A small door slides aside in the Tin Soldier's belly. Kalos removes the sundae with obvious enthusiasm.]

Tin Soldier: "Here you are, my friend."

Kalos: "Do you do fried ice cream?

Tin Soldier: "Certainly."

Kalos: "Really? So... how do you make it all? I mean, is it some sort of artificial transmutation of some intert elements?"

Tin Soldier: "No, I have a number of comestible ingredients at my disposal, which I use to manufacture the ice cream and other frozen desser treats. For special orders, I have a number of contacts on Earth available who can quickly deliver supplies. My maintenance and supplies expenses are fully funded by RossumGov, a gift of gratitude the the Legion of Super-Heroes in perpetuity."

Kalos: "And where do you keep these ingredients? I mean, yeah, you're kind of round, but I assumed you were pretty much filled with machinery."

Tin Soldier: "Part of my internal structure includes a number of small 'pocket dimensions' which hold containers in which I can hold ingredients at various temperatures. For example, milk, cream and coconut oil at temperatures near that of liquid nitrogen, fructose and

Kalos: "And how many of these containers do you have? How big are they?"

Tin Soldier: "Eight containers, approximately one cubic meter each. Sixteen containers, approximately one-quarter cubic meter eath. Thirty-two containers, approximately one-sixteenth cubic meter each. Sixty-four containers, approximately sixteen thousand cubic centimeters each..."

Kalos: "OK, OK. And how do you fill these containers?"

Tin Soldier: "As I have no need for sleep, I use my quarters at the Clubhouse as a storage facility. I am able to teleport materials into my personal storage units through common short-range wormhole technology."

Kalos: "Now, you can't actually harm a sentient being, can you?"

Tin Soldier: "The First Law of Robotics: No robot may intentionally harm a sentient being, nor, through inaction, allow a sentient being to come to harm."

Kalos: "What if one sentient being is trying to harm another?"

Tin Soldier: "It is a conundrum. My primary function is to produce ice cream, and other frozen confectionaries for the benefit of the Legion of Super-Heroes and their allies. Philosophy is a secondary function."

Kalos: "Listen, I want you to do something for me. Clear out one of those one-meter containers, and if you ever see a sentient being trying to harm another, pop it inside, OK? Is that possible?"

Tin Soldier: "Indeed, it solves the conundrum elegantly. However, I would need to be within a few inches of the subject. My wormhole generator has an extremely limited effective range."

Kalos: "Could I take a look at the inside one of those containers?"

Tin Soldier: "If you will accompany me to my quarters, I will evacuate the tank currently filled with jalapeño sugar syrup. It has proven less popular than my designers had anticipated. I can then teleport you into the emptied container."

[Later. Herokalos appears out of a wormhole in front of Tin Soldier.]

Tin Soldier: "Where you harmed? You were knocking on the interior of my storage tank quite vigorously."

Kalos: "No, no, Tin, not harmed. Not harmed at all. But I was pounding that interior wall with all the strength of Hercules, and couldn't make a dent in it."

Tin Soldier: "It is of regenerating inertron. Were you to make a fissure in the surface, it would immediately seal over."

Kalos: "Tin, do you ever think you might be under-appreciated?"

Tin Soldier: "I do not generally hold opinions about other people."

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[Conversation between Herokalos Herculides (Kalos for short) and Nikolas Hermes, the Legion Leader (aka Caduceus) both native of the planet Neohellas]

Caduceus: "Herokalos, I must say, we're lucky to have you in the Legion... If you don't mind a personal question, why were you rejected from UltraCorps? The 'Strength of Hercules' would seem to more than qualify you."

Kalos: "Actually, the Strength of Hercules is far less than, say, Daxamite strength, as Saturday Girl has demonstrated that quite effectively.
“Just as your family has been attempting to technologically replicate the abilities of Asclepius, my family has been attempting to replicate the strength of Herakles.
I am a designed mutant, bred for super-strength, but also with a condition known as trisomy-21. Modern medicine is proficient in reversing the physical disabilities this mutation engenders, but the mental disability is a chronic condition which can only be managed. In order to keep my mental faculties up to par, I have a cranially-implanted computer chip. Without this 'thinking-brain dog', my intellect… well, unimpressive."
"While I am a perfectly nice person without the intellectual augmentation, UltraCorps felt my utter reliance on the technology to engage in more sophisticated conversation and planning sessions was reason enough to exclude me from the Corps."

Caduceus: "So you have the Strength of Hercules, and a Computer Brain, and UltraCorps still rejected you?"

Kalos: "They are an elite group."

Caduceus: "And yet somehow they feel they are in competition with the Legion."

Kalos: "I had hoped that membership in the Legion would allow me to augment and improve my powers. Ideally, the Herculides seek the Strength of Herakles, the Wisdom of Athena, the Stamina of Atlas, the Power of Zeus, the Courage and Invulnerability of Achilles, and the Speed and Flight powers of Hermes. This flight ring alone, for example, allows me to mimic the power of Hermes."

Caduceus: "According to legend, Achilles gained invulnerability by bathing in the river Styx. Ever considered that?"

Kalos: "You are jesting, of course. I doubt I would be able to find the entrance to the Underworld without help. And return alive."

Caduceus: "Actually, I might know a guy..."

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[Scene: The Magic Museum's food court. Herokalos and Dingbat are sharing a table.]

Kalos: Just a warning: although technically ‘on leave’, I am wearing a Legion Flight Ring, and this entire conversation-- in fact, anything that happens around me-- is automatically recorded.

Dingbat: I know, I'm a big Legion fan. Does this mean I'll be seen on the holo-vids?

Kalos: That is up to The Holding Company, and their producers. However, Legion programming is currently broadcast four hours a week, plus specials, so there is a good chance. I don’t think my ‘vacation’ was approved lightly.

Dingbat: Sounds a lot more glamorous than what I do.

Kalos: You work here at the Magic Museum?

Dingbat: No, I'm an upaid docent here. What I actually do is... I'm a trust fund brat.

Kalos: Your father is a member of the Wizard's Council on the Sorcerer's World?

Dingbat: A Wizard's Council. He pays to keep me here on Earth, where I won't be an embarrassment to him. See this picture? [shows a small hologram] That's me, before the accident. Now, I still look like that to myself-- a couple of years older-- but I'm magically blind. To everyone else, I look like a purple gargoyle.

Kalos: Oh, but very attractive gargoyle.

Dingbat: I thought this was business, not speed-dating. You can’t see the real me, anyway. Or I can’t see the real me.

Kalos: But this is a transformation, not a glamour? Surely you can sense and make use of your wings.

Dingbat: Nope. The wings are for decoration only. And I pick out regular clothes, which magically adjust to fit my transmogrified form. And the spell is unbreakable, because no direct magic-- other than this accidental transformation-- will work on me. In fact, I am unable to work even the smallest candle-lighting spell.

Kalos: But despite your magical... disability, you are an expert on the study of Magic, true?

Dingbat: Yes, I guess it's all part of my heritage. My mother is a prominent member of a wizard’s council on the Sorcerer’s world as well. Nikk said you needed my expertise?

Kalos: I am currently on a two-week leave of absence from the Legion, pursuing an attempt to increase my usefulness... that is, increase my power levels.

Dingbat: According to the Legion Show, you have the Strength of Hercules. That seems pretty powerful to me.

Kalos: And I am quite durable, as well. But I am seeking the Courage of Achilles.

Dingbat: Achilles’ 'courage' came from the fact that he was basically invulnerable to all harm...

Kalos: I want to see if you can give me directions to the River Styx.

Dingbat: Whew. That is one dangerous journey, and there is no way to get there on Earth. Over the last few centuries, virtually all portals, doorways, and passages to the magical planes have either closed up or withered away.

Kalos: Then... but are there such portal on the Sorcerer's World?

Dingbat: Actually, I was thinking of... Faerth.

Kalos: That is a world outside the United Planets.

Dingbat: But classically... you'll need a guide. And two silver coins, a large cake, and an Ariadne’s Thread.

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[Dingbat and Herokalos charter a flight to the planet Astoria, which is the nearest U.P. world to Faerth. They then hire a “Space Cabbie” to take them the rest of the way to Faerth. He seems quite anxious to leave.]

[Faerth is a world which appears to be a vast rocky wasteland. Scattered across its surface, however, are various gateways to 'Faeryland', an expansive, near-limitless dimension of magical places and creatures. Faeryland includes Oz, Wonderland, Looking-Glass Land, Narnia, Tir na Og, Amber, Arntor, Landover... well, you get the idea.]

Dingbat: Now, as I am immune to magic, I will be unable to ‘cross over’ into Faeryland. However, I will be able to see you as you on your quest, although the landscape and faery-folk you meet will be invisible to me. I really can’t see how I can communicate with you while you’re there, but if you will narrate what you see there, I can at least get an rough idea of what is happening, and inform others of your progress.
Remember: the Faery can be dangerous and unpredictable. Eat nothing, and accept no gifts. Your backpack contains sufficient food and water for three days; if you begin to run out, turn back.
The technology in your flight ring will not work once you cross over, nor will any other advanced technology. My backpack contains the latest in camping equipment, but your materials are would have been popular about fifteen hundred years ago.
Don’t be afraid to turn around and leave if things get too tricky. There is a reason few mortals make it to the Underworld.

Herokalos: What should we do first?

Dingbat: We need to find one of the crossing-over points to Faeryland. I suggest you use that flight ring one last time, and take to the skies. Look for stacks of rocks that suggest they were placed intentionally, or anything that looks strange or out-of-place.

[Herokalos performs reconnaissance, then returns to Dingbat]

Kalos: I think I found something over her. [leads the way] What do you think?

Dingbat: Those stones... yes, it might be...

Kalos: Wait, don’t you see a white picket fence with pink roses entwining it?

Dingbat: Nope. No such thing. Guaranteed to be magical, then. I’ll walk through with you, but you will see me vanish when you move to the other plane.

[Kalos now enters an area of Faeryland known as Zauberwald, a forest of lush vegetation and talking trees, flowers, and stones. He falls to his knees, clutching his head.]

Kalos: Dingbat! My TBD chip... it’s going off-line... I...

Dingbat: Kalos! Cross back! Come back! Please!

[But it is too late. Herokalos cannot hear her, and at any rate has been captivated by the wonders of the Faeryland that surround him.]


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Dingbat of Tharn is the daughter of the august wizards 'Captain Lumiere' and 'Madame Tiercelet'. Those are her parents' 'magial names', not their True Names, which are by tradition carefully guarded on the Sorcerer's World. Dingbat's True Name (the name given her at birth) is Minn Lumiere. However, she is known almost exclusively as Dingbat, Ding to her friends.
Born on Tharn in the year 3230, she suffered a magical accident due to her father's experiments in the year 3252. The accident transformed her into her current form, and left her magically blind. She cannot see the effects of magic: transformed objects retain their true appearance, magical illusions are invisible to her, fully magical creatures, such as elves, unicorns and dragons are invisible, inaudible, and intangible to her. She is wholly unable to work the smallest magical effect: not even a simple candle-lighting spell, or successfully mixing two alchemical ingredients. Nor can she be harmed by magical attack, nor benefited by direct magical spells.
She is nevetheless well-acquainted with magical lore and theory, as proficient as any undergraduate of a magical university.
Banished by her father to Earth-- or anywhere other than the Sorcerer's World-- she lives comfortably on the proceeds of a generous trust fund. For many years, she spent her time as an unpaid docent at the Metropolis Museum of Magic.
She famously accompanied Herokalos to Faerth in the quest for a path into the Underworld, and once again in the ill-fated Legion quest for the Water of Life.
Dingbat joined the Substitute Legion of Super-Heroes of Throon in the year 3259; due to her magical blindness, she was able to remove the White Elephant amulet from Albin Pacchus, restoring him to human form. Mostly to keep it still in the safe control of the SLSH, Dingbat wore the amulet for awhile, as it had no effect on her.
Eventually Cat Weel of Earth requested to become the new White Elephant in 2960.

She is pictured her in her SLSH costume.

[At this point, if this were being presented in comic book form, you might want to begin a split-column format: on the left, the lush magical world Kalos finds himself in; on the right, the rocky, barren landscape in which Dingbat sees them both. Herokalos slowly rises from his knees.]

Herokalos: Hey Ding! Look at this place! There are so many colors!

Tree: Greetings, young stranger.

Herokalos: Hey Ding! Come see this! A tree talked to me!

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[Dingbat has been pushing hard on Herokalos, trying to get him to move back toward the gate, but has had no success.]

Dingbat: Come on, big guy. I’m right here. Move! Back to reality...

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Herokalos: [looking around] Now where did her go?

Tree: Have you lost your friend? I’m sure she will catch up to you soon. [Reaches into its branches] Here—have a piece of fruit while you’re waiting.

[The fruit is beautiful and vari-colored, something like a ripening mango.]

Herokalos: Thank you, Tree. This fruit looks good!

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Dingbat: NO! You can’t eat Fairy Food! [Although the fruit is invisible to her, Dingbat begins slapping at his hand wildly. By some fortunate chance, she succeeds.]

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Herokalos: [drops fruit] Hey, your fruit tingles my hand!

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[Dingbat is now desperately pulling on the straps of Herokalos’ backpack.]

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Herokalos: Hey! I remember, we brought our own food.
[Opens backpack, and then recoils in horror. The transparent food packs are full of writhing worms. He dumps the pack on the ground.] Ugh! It’s all wormy.

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[On the other side, of course, the food is perfectly normal.]

Dingbat: [to herself] I can’t let this go to waste. He may not eat it, but this will last me an extra week!

[Keeping half an eye on Herokalos, who is starting to wander, she begins to pick up the food and water packs and move them into her own pack. As she does so, they disappear on Faeryland side.]

Herokalos: Oh, hello, Mister.

Dingbat: ...oh please give me some clue as to whom or what you are talking to...

Herokalos: I am Kalos. I am here with my friend Ding on a Quest.

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FireDrake: [he is manifesting his human form: a small, elderly Chinese man] Very pleased to meet you, Mr. Kalos. You may call me Mr. Dong Xi.

Herokalos: Mr. Donkey? Ha-ha. That is a funny name. Do you have them to ride?

FireDrake: I am called Yan Dong-Xi, little one, after the famous General.

Herokalos: I am not so little! You are littler than me.

FireDrake: ...But I wish I did have an animal to ride. I have far to go, and I am old and tired.

Herokalos: I can carry you. I am good at helping good people.

FireDrake: Why, thank you, young man. Such nobility of character deserves a reward. Take me to where I need to go, and I can offer you a fine meal, good lodgings, and someone to speak to about your Quest.

Herokalos: Climb on my shoulders; I will carry you where you need to go. You can see the road and show me the way. Hold on tight, I can go fast!

FireDrake: Thank you, my stout young friend.

[FireDrake climbs on Herokalos’ shoulders. The Neohellan’s feet sink a couple of inches into the ground; the creature is heavier than he appears. But with the strength of Hercules, Kalos is soon covering five hundred yards in each loping stride. This is something he has practiced before.]

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Dingbat: Where is he off to? And with whom—or what? Well, I can keep up if I put on the flying belt.

[She removes her flying belt from her pack, fastens it on, and is soon traveling quickly in pursuit.

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[Herokalos and FireDrake run past green woods, fields, meadows and hills, dotted with strange trees and exotic flowers. Herokalos crosses streams and rivers in mighty strides and leaps, while FireDrake sits comfortably on his shoulders. At last they come to a small settled area, no more than a couple of square miles in size. A Palladian mansion stretches over a small eastern hill. Nearby, a great stone castle looms, twenty stories tall. In the lowlands before it there sits a sparkling blue lake in a grassy meadow. Beyond are Western Woodlands, and there are indications of a few more houses there. To the north, a tall rocky formation, including a sheer cliff juts up from the ground. FireDrake directs Herokalos towards the castle. The cross a broad moat, and come to a portcullis fifty feet tall.]

Herokalos: That is a big door.

FireDrake: My friend is a big man, but he will be your friend, too.

[The portcullis opens. The giant Staggor is revealed. He fills the door frame.]

Staggor: [quietly] Who is this, FireDrake? And why are you using him as a steed?

FireDrake: [climbing down] This is Kalos, an Earth man, unless I am mistaken. He has been allowing me to rest my weary old bones (he gives the giant a wink) as we have journeyed here to meet with you. I must say, he is remarkably strong for a common man.
Kalos, this is my friend Staggor the Giant.

Herokalos: Stagger is a new friend?

Staggor: Yes, I will be your friend, Kalos. How can we aid you?

FireDrake: Kalos seems to have somehow temporarily misplaced his traveling companion. I suspect, however, someone may not be far away. I promised him a good meal and a bed tonight. Your castle seemed a likely choice; surely you have room at your table for one as small as he?

Staggor: Enter, my old friend, and my new friend. I am roasting a couple of oxen for lunch, and you may have a pound or two. Why have you come to Zauberwald, friend Kalos.

Kalos: We are here... Ding knows about it. She... It is hard to explain.

Staggor: Make yourself comfortable on one of the couches, friend Kalos. Friend Drake, come help me at the fire.

[As Herokalos settles on one of the smaller of the immense couches, FireDrake accompanies Staggor over to an immense fireplace and rotisserie, where two whole oxen are turning.]

Staggor: [to FireDrake] Refresh yourself. [FireDrake breathes in the flames from the fireplace, out of sight of Herokalos.]

FireDrake: What do you think of him?

Staggor: I think caution is warranted. He may be god-touched.

FireDrake: There is nothing magical about him. Despite his prodigious strength, it seems of a perfectly natural origin.

Staggor: That is not what I mean, and you know it. He may be a True Innocent.

FireDrake: And so? The Fellowship has no ulterior motives. Our only desire is to help the questor.

Staggor: The Fellowship, true. But you... and the others... always have some hidden agenda. Give him food, and rest, and refreshment. Have Jenny interview him, but I don’t think you will be able to keep him.

FireDrake: He is on a quest of some sort, that is certain. And we are avowed to help those in need. Indeed, what else would we do with our time? And if he is a True Innocent, we are all the more bound, are we not? You entertain our friend; I will go visit the others. We will meet this evening at the Manor, with Kalos again as our guest. That fusspot Ghirardelli will be glad of something to do; he will only be sorry it was not a hundred knights and their cavalry on this short notice.

Staggor: I am always ready to Quest. But I trust you and the others about as far as I can throw you all... Although that is pretty far, come to think of it.

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[Dingbat has used her Omnicom in the meantime to contact Legion HQ. Tin Soldier is on Mission Monitor Board duty.]

Tin Solider: "Welcome to the Legion of Super Heroes Mission Monitor Board. What is the nature of your emergency?"

Dingbat: "Tin, I need to speak to Caduceus right away, please."

Tin Soldier: "Lord Caduceus is in a meeting and cannot be disturbed."

Dingbat: "'Lord' Caduceus? Tin, has someone been messing with your programming?"

Tin Soldier: "The Second Law of Robotics: A robot must obey the orders of any sentient being, as long as it does not conflict with the First Law."

Dingbat: [carefully] "Tin Soldier, Herokalos is in peril. You can help by allowing me to speak with the Legion Leader. If necessary, ignore any commands given to you by S.E.P. Lad or anyone else in order to accomplish this."

Tin Soldier: "Thank you, Minn Lumiere. Legion Leader Caduceus will not be available for at least one hour. However, I have summoned Deputy Leader Jill Frost to the Mission Monitor Board."

Jill Frost: "Dingbat, what is going on on Faerth? The Holding Company shut down the transmission feed once Kalos passed through that gate."

Dingbat: "They probably have no transmission to Feed. Mundane technology doesn’t function properly in Faeryland. And we forgot about his TBDchip. It has shut down, too. He is lost in Faeryland... and with ordinary intelligence. I have been following him with my flying belt-- I can see him from this side, although I can't seem to interact with him. But he can move fast when he wants to, and he had a headstart. I'm afraid I've lost him-- and as he leaves no tracks outside of Faeryland, I'm having a hard time finding him again."

Jill Frost: "Legion Flight Rings broadcast a sub-etheric tracking beacon on Warp Level Nine at 2957 megahertz. Your Omnicon should be able to pick it up."

Dingbat: "That’s more technology will not function in Faeryland. What we need is someone to go in after him, preferably someone with Magical abilities."

Jill Frost: "No on one in the Legion has such powers. Maybe The Holding Company can contact UltraCorps?"

Dingbat: "I doubt UltraCorps would... say, S.E.P. Kid has powers based on Myaran alchemy. That gives him as least a half-magical connection. I can arrange transport for him from here..."

Jill Frost: "We still need permission from The Holding Company before sending resources an Away Mission. I'll meet with Caduceus and get back to you ASAP."

Dingbat: "Thanks, Jill." [now fiddling with her Omnicom, and talking to herself] "2957 Mhz... well, look at that... I am getting a trace. But how? It is possible to interface magic with technology, but that's pretty tricky stuff... even on Sorcerer's World. Would The Holding Company be able to produce that kind of technology?"

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[FireDrake once again enters Staggor's castle. Herokalos is finishing a tremendous meal.]

FireDrake: "Well, our honored guest, how was your lunch?"

Herokalos: [laughing] "Ha-ha! A peach as big as my head! I want lunch every day with a giant!"

FireDrake: [to Staggor] "I will take him down to the Pond for the afternoon. After sunset, the rest will meet there, and we will go up to Manor for dinner."

Staggor: "I will meet you at the Manor."

FireDrake: "Come with me, young man. I want to introduce you to the rest of our Fellowship."
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[Herokalos follows FireDrake out of the castle, across the moat, and down into a shallow vale. At the bottom is a large pond, fed by a silvery stream which trickles down from a rocky escarpment away in the distance. They walk out onto a natural dock; an outcropping of stone which reaches several yards out into the pond. A largish duck that looks like a patchwork pastiche of every breed of duck that ever lived, swims up and flies onto the dock.]

Odd Duck: “So this is our new employer?”

FireDrake: “May be, may be. Kalos, allow me to introduce you to The Odd Duck. Duck, this is Herokalos, a stranger in these parts.”

Odd Duck: “Ha! Do you like to swim, Herokalos? Follow me!”

[Odd Duck takes a long flying leap into the pond. Herokalos enthusiastically follows him. FireDrake leaves the two, who immediately befome fast friends, and swim together until the evening. Sometime in the afternoon, Dingbat catches up to Herokalos, led there by his somehow still-functional Flight Ring beacon. She watches him frolic, alone, apparently insanely, in a great, empty Faerthan crater. As the sun sets, FireDrake returns with an armored, caped character scarcely a meter tall. Odd Duck brings the dripping-wet Herokalos back to the shore.]

FireDrake: “May I introduce our Dwarf Lord, Obermaus. Companion and Master of the enchanted axe, Mitxi, holder of one of the Nine Rings, and Treasure Guardian of the Fellowship.
“Lord Obermaus, allow me to present Herokalos, who today entreats our services.”

Obermaus: “A pleasure, I’m sure. [eyeing Herokalos’ hand] Say, is that ring valuable?”

Herokalos: [As if noticing the ring for the first time.] “It means... I am a Legionnaire.” [Obermaus and FireDrake exchange glances.]

[Over a hillock appears from the shadows the form of a oily, blackish-green semi-humanoid, moving toward the group as it leaves a snail-like trail of grubby emerald slime behind it.]

FireDrake: “And here is our Shoggoth...”

Tekeli-Li: “Tekeli-Li, by name, friend Kalos. Greetings, and welcome from the Companions of the Fellowship.” [Its ‘eyes’ glow with an unearthly light.]

Herokalos: “Mr. Tickle! Ha-ha! Mr. Donkey, your friends have some funny names!”

[An peculiar chill falls over the little group, even though it is twilight. From the depths of the western woods, an unearthly apparition appears. So white it appears to glow in the evening dusk, it glides toward the small group standing on the dock of the pond.]

Herokalos: [terrified] “What is that?”

FireDrake: “It is only our Companion, Melchior. He will be doubtless the greatest friend you have among us.”

Herokalos: “NO! Make him go away! He is scary and bad! [hypnotically] ...staring into its black eyes is like peering into the hollow vastness of an empty eternity of space...”

FireDrake: [to himself] “I always forget about this...”

[Odd Duck flies up to Herokalos, slapping him in the face with his wings.]

Odd Duck: “Get a hold of yourself! Settle down, you dope! There’s nothing wrong here!”

[Herokalos grabs Odd Duck by the neck, tossing him about a quarter mile.]

Herokalos: “I do not like being slapped by that little duck.” [Obermaus now flies up, attempting to restrain Herokalos] “You are strong, little dwarf, but I am stronger!” [He shrugs off Obermaus, sending him hurtling into the returning Odd Duck. Obermaus quickly recovers, throwing his axe at Herokalos’ head. Herokalos easily plucks it out of the air, and sends it flying in the opposite direction—this time using substantially more of his strength. It flies out of sight. “Mitxi!” cries Obermaus, and flies away after it.]

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[Meanwhile, on the empty surface of Faerth, Dingbat is trying to wordlessly soothe the terrified Herokalos. Over in Faeryland, Odd Duck hits Herokalos like a missle, and it is now Herokalos flying backwards through the air. Dingbat falls to the ground—her arm is broken from the glancing impact with Herokalos. Eyes watering in pain, she fumbles in her backpack for her first-aid kit, and the pre-programmed cast and sling. She also attempts to call again to LSHQ, but receives a “No Connection Available” message.

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[Herokalos returns to the pond with a great leap. He is now standing in a large crater.]

Herokalos: “You are not nice people! You are bad to hit me! I will...”

[But Tekeli-Li has assumed the form of Dingbat, and addresses the over-agitated Herokalos.]

Tekeli-Li: [as Dingbat] “Kalos... wait. These are our friends! Remember Duck... Mr. Donkey... Mr. Tickle... [It has created another image of itself, rising from the slime on the ground.] Look at Melchior... ‘Milky’... he is not so scary after all, is he? [mentally broadcasting to the others] {This is the questing-partner I have seen within his mind... I cannot see what happened to her... He is confused, his heart clouded... I am dampening his emotions... feeding off the fear caused by Melchior... he should regain his senses soon... let us proceed to the Manor.}

[Herokalos has now calmed down, having seemingly forgotten his frantic episode. He looks with interest now at Melchior, who somehow gives him a mouthless smile. Odd Duck is more sullen, and Obermaus holds his beloved axe protectively. Tekeli-Li maintains his illusion of duality, his green self accompanying the faux-Dingbat. Only FireDrake seems pleased as they proceed up toward a white marble mansion on another hilltop, angling away from Staggor’s Castle. The real Dingbat, nursing her broken arm, follows the lone Herokalos along an empty, rocky terrain which mirrors the local geography of the Other Side.]

[They are greeted at the gate of Elveston Manor by the young Elwin Elveston himself, a Great Elf, tall, slender and pale. He greets them warmly, and escorts them across the grounds. The grounds are lit by floating spheres of St. Elmo’s Fire, and they pass a large number of industrious Greater and Lesser Elves trimming the hedges, working the gardens, repairing outdoor fences and furniture, cleaning, painting, carving and mowing.]

Elwin Elveston: “These are the Evening Elves, who work from sunset to midnight. Then the Midnight Elves come on for their shift, working from midnight to dawn. After that, the Morning Elves work from sunrise to noon, and lastly, the Day Elves work from noon to dusk. Then the cycle begins again. Elveston Manor provides useful employment for over a thousand, who would otherwise be slothful and indolent, and apt to trouble-making. These are no slaves, but are paid well with Fairy-gold and Fairy-silver.”

[They are greeted at the doors of the Mansion itself by the Elveston butler, Ghirardelli. Tall even for a Great Elf, he is also more robust and broad-chested than most of his kind. He would appear somewhat overdressed, in white tie and tails, except that his entire ensemble is a bright lime-green. He escorts the group through the house, passing room after room, including a couple of large halls where the Day-Elves are finishing their evening meal. They are led into a dining-hall with a table large enough to seat two dozen; only half the table is set. The giant Staggor, now only as tall the Ghirardelli, stands gazing out a window at the fairy-lights illuminating the grounds.]

Staggor: “We will be missing Scarlet Jenny this evening. She is unavoidably detained on personal business. But perhaps Kalos can enlighten the rest of us over dinner on the nature of his quest.”

[It is a strange meal. Unlike the huge portions at Staggor’s Castle, this meal consists of a dozen tiny dishes placed in front of each guest. FireDrake’s meal seems to consist of nothing but goblets of fire. Melchior’s dishes are covered with gauze napkins, which, when lifted, seem to reveal perfectly empty bowls. Elwin, Herokalos, Odd Duck, Obermaus and Staggor are served ordinary food, but Staggor’s dishes are rapidly emptied and refilled over and over again throughout the meal. The Elven servers can barely keep up. Tekeli-Li and the faux-Dingbat eat nothing.]

[Dingbat herself sits on the rocky surface of mundane Faerth, beneath a camping lantern on a tripod. Her meal is a couple of nutrition bars from Herokalos’ pack, and a flask of plain water. She thoughtfully observes her companion, apparently eating his fill of invisible food as he relaxes on an outcropping of rock across from her. “Well, you’ve surely done it, Legionnaire,” she thinks. “You’ve eaten Fairy Food for sure. Still, we may be able to negotiate your way out, if we can send someone across to get to you.”]

Elwin: “So tell us, Herokalos, of your purpose here in our woods. How may we help you on your quest?”

Herokalos: “Dingbat knows. She can tell.”

Tekeli-Li [as faux-Dingbat]: “Oh, you tell them, Kalos. I’s sure they want to hear from you. Why are we here?”

Herokalos: “I... it’s hard. I need... I need to go swimming.”

FireDrake: “Swimming? Then we have helped you on your way already!”

Herokalos: “No... not here. There is... a door here. I need to go through the door and go swimming.”

Tekeli-Li: {I am unable to see what is in his mind. He seems quite confused. I think it would be valuable to find this Dingbat, but I cannot imagine where she would be.}

Elwin: “Put your mind at ease, friend Herokalos. Stay with us another night; this time, here at Elveston Manor. I will assign one of my servants as your personal escort.”

Tekeli-Li: I, for one, have had quite a feast tonight. If Melchior will escort me out, we can all meet again tomorrow.

[A young elven girl comes to guide Herokalos to his rooms]

FireDrake: “I feel I must apologize to the Fellowship. He seemed like a good prospect.”

Obermaus: “No need to apologize, my friend. He has a most interesting ring: clearly of outworldly origin, it radiates a small but continual magic. Barely noticeable, but persistent. Most curious. A remarkable prize, if he is willing to part with it.

Odd Duck: “I like him. He knows how to have a good time. I wouldn’t mind if he stayed here with us. I’d build him a bungalow by the pond if this questing companion of his never shows up.”

Staggor: “He is as strong as an Ogre. Strong as me at full size, strong as Odd Duck, maybe strong as Obermaus. Maybe stronger. And not magic strength. He is a strange one. I say be careful.”

Elwin: “Your opinions are noted, my friends. Let Scarlet Jenny have a look at him tomorrow, and see if she can fathom what it is he is looking for. Then we will cast our ballots. As for me, it has been too long between adventures. I might suggest we simply wander the paths outside Zauberwald with him until he trips over whatever it is.”

Herokalos has, of course, got himself mixed up with
The Companions of the Fellowship, formed in Zauberwald as a questing group to aid anyone who seeking help in pursuing any sort of adventure, quest or expedition. Each Companion has their own reasons for being a part of the group, but it is rare that any one that comes to them has been turned away. During slow periods, members of the group will go on solo quests to seek out those who might need their help.

A brief summary of the Eight Companions:

(1)Elwin Elveston, an Elf of Some Means
Although without obvious magical abilities, he is nevertheless the leader of the group. The Elvestons are well-connected, knowing nearly everyone of prominence in their region of Faeryland. His Palladian mansion sits on a full quarter-square-mile of ground in the center of Zauberwald. Although the only member of his family living there, nearly a thousand servants, mostly Greater or Lesser Elves, tend the grounds and the house, as well as a number of animated wooden golems. They are supervised by Elwin's "gentleman's gentleman", butler, and majordomo, an elf named Ghirardelli.

(2) Melchior, a White Ghast
Possessing flight, invisibility, intangibility, it is followed and surrounded by mystical Mists of Fear which generates sheer terror in the heart of anyone who gazes upon it. One does eventually get used to it after a while. Melchior is actually of a more amiable personality than one might expect; this is not obvious, however, as it is entirely mute.

(3) Scarlet Jenny, a Witch Princess
Skilled in all sorts of magic: potions, transfigurations, hexes, charms, she specializes in animation of the inanimate. The heart of the Fellowship, she loves nothing more in life than giving aid to others in need. She is tremendously sympathetic and empathetic, and always ready to lend a hand.
The laws of Magic, however, require that nothing is free in the magical realms, and her home is filled with shelves full of souvenirs, tchotchkes and knick-knacks she has accepted in return for her services.

(4) FireDrake, a Dragon in the Form of a Man
Shown here in his intermediate form, he can also assume the shape of an immense Chinese dragon, and a small, elderly Chinese man. In his "human" form, he often calls himself 'Yan Dongxi' or 'Yan Dong Xi', after the famous general. He is well-versed in magical arts, capable, for example of becoming invisible and intangible, but has almost complete mastery over fire magic in particular. He is able to generate, create, and control fire and flame, including the creation of 'hard-light' constructs with a flickering red-yellow-and-orange appearance of fire.
FireDrake is mischievous and untrustworthy, he is always ready to stir up trouble; and the type who sets fires for the sheer joy of watching others put them out.

(5) Obermaus, an Axe-Wielding, Super-Strong Dwarf
Immensely durable and strong despite his diminutive stature, his red-furred magical cape gives him the power of flight, as well. His magical axe is named Mitxi, cold iron banded with silver, with a pearl-encrusted handle. The axe itself is able to fly on its own, and is marginally sentient.
He has an agreement with the rest of the Companions that any valuable treasure which they may acquire in their quests-- gold, gemstones, fine armor, and so forth-- are to be kept in the Treasure Room of his underground caverns, (Exceptions to the treasure rule may be made for magical items which may be of a particular use to the client or some other companion of the Fellowship)

(6) Tekeli-Li, a Lovecraftian Shoggoth
"Yuggoth... is a strange dark orb at the very rim of our solar system... There are mighty cities on Yuggoth—great tiers of terraced towers built of black stone... The sun shines there no brighter than a star, but the beings need no light. They have other subtler senses, and put no windows in their great houses and temples... The black rivers of pitch that flow under those mysterious cyclopean bridges—things built by some elder race extinct and forgotten before the beings came to Yuggoth from the ultimate voids—ought to be enough to make any man a Dante or Poe if he can keep sane long enough to tell what he has seen..."
"Thog and Thok are the twin moons of Yuggoth. Thog is said to be a pitch-black world... on the surface is the fabled "Ghooric Zone"—a green-litten subterranean cavern containing a putrid lake where "puffed shoggoths splash".

Shoggoths are similar to Antarean Proteans, being telepathic or empathic shape-shifters. While Antareans in their natural form are a pale yellowish-white, Shoggoths are a hideous, oily, greenish-black. Furthermore, while Antareans range from about one to three meters in size, Shoggoths are as large as a New York subway car. In order to interact with more human-sized creatures, Shoggoths may diffuse their mass throughout the surrounding environment.
Shoggoths feed on emotion, and will therefore, when feeding, take a multitude of forms intended to produce intense feelings: attraction, love, hate, fear, terror; altering their form to produce as many emotions, negative and positive, as possible. Because of their size, they may take the form of several individuals—even whole scenes—conjured from their victim’s memories and imaginations.
Tekeli-Li has a separate subterranean cave whose entrance lies near Obermaus' caverns, and which replicates the subjectively more comfortable ghooric environment on Thog.

(7) Staggor, a Red-Haired Giant
Stading fifty feet tall, he possesses a magic ring which will reduce him to one-eighth his size. His immense stone castle lies between Elveston Manor and the Northern Escarpment. With parapets reaching two hundred feet high, sixty-foot ceilings, and rooms five and ten thousand square feet in area, it boasts an immense fireplace, in which a huge pot of vegetable stew is continuously boiling, and whole animals roast on spits over the blaze twenty-four hours a day. Staggor must consume about a ton of food-- mostly meat-- every day. His castle is surrounded with a dozen gigantic fruit trees, at least one of which is bearing at any time. We are talking apples, peaches and pears one or two feet in diameter.
Staggor also owns a pair of seven-league boots, which work perfectly well either at his full size, or when wearing his ring.

(8) Odd Duck, an Actual Duck with Odd Powers
Although only weighing about ten pounds, with a wingspan of just over four feet, he is as strong or stronger than Staggor or Obermaus. As a consequence, he is also able to fly (or swim) at tremendous speeds. Although possessing human-level intelligence, he has a very non-human personality: he has no notion of private ownership, and sees the entire world as his-- and everyone else's-- playground. Entirely hedonistic, even childlike, he lives only for food, drink, play, excitement, and fun. His loyalty to his companions is based on how much fun he thinks they are to be with. His home is the large pond half-way between Elveston Manor and Staggor’s Castle, and the Western Woods.

When Herokalos Herculides awoke, he was unaware that the elfin girl bringing him breakfast was a different elfin girl than the one who had brought him to his room the night before. (The Morning Elf was named Lilymallow; the Evening Elf had been Walnutshell.)

What he was aware of, was a sumptuous breakfast, including two kinds of sausage, fruit, cheese, nuts, various breads and cakes, and some sort of delicious hot beverage almost but not entirely unlike tea.

He had awakened in sky-blue pyjamas, and his uniform lay cleaned, pressed and ready on a divan nearby. The Morning Elf took the leavings of his breakfast while he changed clothes. When he got downstairs, only Mr. Dongxi, of all the Companions, was waiting for him. (It should be noted that the house was not empty: dozens of Greater and Lesser Elves were still moving on and off shift, finishing breakfast or dinner, or attending to the seemingly endless and innumerable needs of the Manor.)

“Kalos, good morning,” Mr. Dongxi announced cheerfully. “We have only one task today; to introduce you to our most accomplished witch, Scarlet Jenny. However, let us take as long as possible to do so. I will give you a tour of our little compound.”

Herokalos followed the little man out onto the grounds of Elveston Manor, through the gates of the grounds, and down a winding path.

“There are eight Estates here,” Mr. Dongxi explained. “One for each of the Companions. You have seen Staggor’s Castle, Elveston Manor, and Odd Duck’s Pond. The entrance to the demesnes of Doss Obermaus and Tekeli-Li lie on the face of the Northern Escarpment.” He indicated the distant cliff face. “The rest of us have Estates within the Western Woods. Let us visit the dwarf first.”

It was a long but pleasant walk through fields of grass and flowers, and occasional small wooded areas. Kalos’ attention was often drawn to some small, quick-moving animal: a squirrel, lizard, or jackelope, which disappeared into the undergrowth nearly as soon as he had laid eyes on it. The abundant vegetation continued up and over the hill of the escarpment, but the steep face was rocky and bare. About a mile along, they came to an open door in the mountainside, set within a frame of cunningly and expertly carved stone.

“Ho, Dwarf Lord!” shouted Mr. Dongxi, and Obermaus immediately appeared in the opening. Entering at the dwarf’s invitation, Herokalos found himself in a low-ceilinged cavern, scarcely tall enough for him to stand upright in. Obermaus leads Herokalos down through an increasingly narrowing tunnel, at last emerging in another, larger chamber—this one filled with treasure.

“I am the Treasurer of the Fellowship,” Obermaus declares. “You must understand that any valuables acquired in the completion of you Quest will be retained by me—that is, us, the Fellowship. Any objects of your specific quest are excluded, of course. We are only interested in incidentals.”

The room is filled with coopered wooden chests gold, silver, and precious stones of all colors. Stands of armor, in all sizes, are places like statues around the room. Some are so large as to be necessarily seated. Swords, anathames and axes as well as wands and staffs of various descriptions lie in display cases, or hang from the walls. Obermaus picks up a plain silver ring, shimmering with a strange iridescence.

“Perhaps you would like a magic ring to aid you on your journey?” he asks.

“I have a ring,” Herokalos replies.

“Ah, yes, so I have noticed. A trade, perhaps?” Herokalos makes no response. “Would you like to know what this ring does?”

“My ring means, I’m a Legionnaire,” Herokalos answers.

“Yes, you said that,” says Obermaus. “I am not sure which Legion you mean. If I had that ring, would I be a Legionnaire?”

“There is only one Legion,” says Herokalos. “I think you are too old to be a Legionnaire.”

“May I inspect it more closely?” Obermaus asks. He drops the silvery ring in exchange for an curiously inscribed jeweler’s glass. “Ah, interesting. I see that it is more or less permanently bonded to you… ooh, those two spikes go right through the bone… yes, it is not completely functional… I wonder what it can do when it is… what a strange pattern of runes, layer upon layer, and on the inside of the ring… I am unfamiliar with that metal; and that one-- and such a tiny speck… fascinating… and there is some sort of enchantment… very small, even most experts would have missed it… certainly Mr. Dongxi would not have seen it at first… “
He looks up at Herokalos’ smiling face. “Oh, it would be useless to try to trade for it anyway. I can’t see any way to get it without cutting off your finger.”

“Don’t cut off my finger! I want to keep my ring!” Herokalos cries.

“No, no, don’t get upset. Of course not. You are an extraordinary young man, Herokalos, and there is more than one unsolved mystery about you.”

The two return to the surface, where Mr. Dongxi is awaiting them.

“You really must invite me into your home sometime, friend Dwarf,” Mr. Dongxi says.

“I am sure you have been here already, unseen, my clever friend.” Obermaus replies.

“How little you know me, how little you know me.” Mr. Dongxi replies. “Come, Kalos, let us continue on our way.”

Another mile on, they come to a black hole in the ground, two meters wide, extending straight downwards for as far as the eye can see, until it at last fades into blackness. The rocks around the rim are darkly stained and pitted. A distant, unpleasant odor rises from the hole.

“This is the home of our friend Tekeli-Li,” Mr. Dongxi explains. “It is probably best not to disturb him at this hour of the morning. He can be a late sleeper, and may not rise until twilight, or even until the stars properly align. Still, here it is. My home lays a way ahead, in the Western Woods.”

Crossing a silvery stream over a narrow bridge, they come to the Western Wood. The meadow grass here mostly gives way to ferns and moss, and the trees grow closer together. There is a well-worn path winding through the Woods. The trees smile at them as they pass, the flowers wave, and near-humanoid pixies, sprites, gobkins, and minor elves greet them from atop the toadstools. Several birds are carrying on conversations in their miscellaneous musical languages. Mr. Dongxi stops in front of a squarish white house with red trim, with appurtenances in the Chinese style.

Mr. Dongxi seems very proud of his estate. The ferns and mosses and sparse grasses of the surrounding forest have been cleared away here, and the house is surrounded by an extensive rock gardens. The interior of the house is elegant. There are finely carved chairs, lounges, tables, and bookshelves. Statues and carvings, large and small, decorate the rooms. Lavish curtains and tapestries hang from the walls. While the décor is mostly red and gold, fine painting and sketches in hues of blue or green also add color to the walls. There are sixteen beautifully appointed sitting-rooms, but no bedrooms, no kitchen, no dining area. The furniture seems brand-new, not merely well-maintained. There is no sign of dust or cobwebs, but there is an odd sense that the house has not been lived in, has not been actually used.

Herokalos is awed by the surroundings; he takes no notice of the peculiar eccentricities of the place. Yet he feels a growing unease, a desire to be moving on, a reluctance to spend much time here.

“You have a nice house, Mr. Donkey,” he says. “We have walked a long way. I am getting hungry.”

“You will find a fine luncheon waiting at our journey’s end,” Mr. Dongxi assures him. “Let us continue on our way.”

A stroll through the woods of about forty-five minutes brings them to the home of Melchior. Well back ffom the path is a rundown mansion, the grounds consisting of some strange matted colorless covering. It is a prototypical gothic haunted house, gray, disheveled and tumble-down. The gray grounds of the haunted house are also home to numerous ghostly animals: horses, rabbits, squirrels, badgers, birds, even ectoplasmic insects. Mr. Dongxi stays well between the house and Herokalos, who does not need to be told whose abode this is.

Another hour’s walk brings them to their destination. Herokalos at first does not understand why they are stopping; this part of the Western Woods seems no different than any other. Careful observation, however, reveals a narrow gravelstone path leading to a cunning little cottage with a thatched roof, set back from the path. It is of such a natural appearance and design that it blends in thoroughly with the woods around it. Wildflowers and talking trees grow around it, as they do everywhere else in the Western Woods.

Mr. Dongxi steps back from the graveled path. “This is as far as I go; Jenny has never invited me into her demesnes, either.” Herokalos continues on up to the little house, and knocks on the door.

The door is opened by a forbidding figure in deep, blood-red robes. Although a head shorter than Herokalos, she seems to tower up at him. Her head is cowled, and her face hidden is shadow. Still, she beckons Herokalos in, and he obeys. She reminds him of a particularly stern teacher he had at school, although he cannot quite remember which one.

Scarlet Jenny throws back the hood. Her face is young and pretty, if not breathtakingly beautiful. Her hair is blonde, her eyes are blue, and when she smiles, they literally twinkle. Perhaps it is some kind of magic, but she puts the nervous Herokalos immediately at ease.

“The FireDrake was right about you,” Jenny says. “You reek of Quest. My companions and I would be glad to join you, if only we can determine what it is.” She indicates a small but sturdy table in what is apparently the dining area. It is set for two, with cups, spoons, and bowls, and two red tapered candles burning in the centerpiece. “Sit now, and have some supper.”

As Herokalos sits in one of the very comfortable chairs, Jenny takes a bowl, and crosses to a cauldron bubbling under a window in the corner. There is no fire beneath it, but it bubbles, hisses and steams anyway. She dips in a ladle, and spoons a rich vegetable stew into the bowl. She then takes Herokalos’ cup, and from the same cauldron, fills the cup with hot chocolate. Her own bowl is filled with a bouillabaisse, and her cup with hot tea. It does not take Herokalos much time to empty his bowl, and Scarlet Jenny refills it. When the second bowl is empty, she fills it a third time with Neapolitan ice cream, so cold it steams. Jenny herself is on her first bowl of soup.

Herokalos finds the food wonderfully filling and the chair wonderfully comfortable. He is experiencing that wonderful drowsiness that comes from a good meal with chocolate. The candles, too, produce a relaxing incense, and half-awake and half-dozing, Herokalos relaxes back into his cushioned chair.

[Scarlet Jenny clears the table as Herokalos naps. She then sets down a crystal ball on a stand, and a shallow golden bowl. She fills the bowl with black ink. She then regards Herokalos.]

Scarlet Jenny: How did you come here, Herokalos?

Herokalos: We came through a little white gate.

Scarlet Jenny: And why are you here?

Herokalos: Ding says, ‘Just passing through’. I need to find the door out.

Scarlet Jenny: And where are you going, to, Herokalos?

Herokalos: It’s hard to remember. I need to get some sticks.

Scarlet Jenny: Sticks?

Herokalos: I need to find the door out, and get some sticks, and go swimming.

Scarlet Jenny: You need to go swimming with the sticks? [realizing] Oh, no. Do you mean the River Styx?

Herokalos: Yeah, I need to find the door out, and find the river sticks, and go swimming. Ding said she’d help me, but I lost her.

Scarlet Jenny: Well, go back to sleep, Herokalos, and let me see if I can find your friend.

[Jenny traces a fingernail over the bowl of black ink. A silver line forms, dividing the surface in two. “So, not in Faeryland,” she muses. “Yet I cannot find her out of Faeryland, either. But not a Dream, not Imaginary. [Her fingers make increasingly complex patterns in the ink. Then with a final wave, the surface turns pure black again. She looks at Herokalos. “So, where is she in relation to you?” She gazes at the sleeping Herokalos through the crystal. “Why, she is right here beside you!” Checks the ink again. “But not in Faeryland. What realm do you come from, Herokalos?” She draws silvery patterns in the ink again. “You are here, but she sees you there… but I cannot see her there. A powerful sorceress, perhaps, shielding herself from direct magical perception?” Jenny stands.

Scarlet Jenny: O Sorceress, companion of Herokalos, If you can hear me, reveal youself! We are friends, and wish you and your charge no harm. We only desire to join in this Quest to find the River Styx!

But Dingbat is sitting on a semi-comfortable stone, eating one of the nutritive bars they brought. All she can see is Herokalos. All she can hear is his snoring.


Later…

Seven Companions of the Fellowship are meeting in Elveston Hall. Odd Duck is happily swimming in his pond with Herokalos.

Scarlet Jenny: His goal is the River Styx. He seeks to bathe in its waters, like that fool Achilles.

FireDrake: Not sure I know that story, Jenny.

Scarlet Jenny: It was thousands of years ago. Some foolish water elemental dunked her half-human child in the Styx, hoping to break a prophecy of his death. She could have just raised him as a farmer instead of a warrior. Forgot to bathe his foot, or something, and he ended up dying of sepsis, or something. Same story with some Norseman named Siegfried, only it was Dragon’s Blood that time. Not too many Stygian Dragons left in the Universes, though.

Tekeli-Li: {There is an entrance to the Underworld about fifty leagues from here. Staggor could take him there in seven steps.}

Elwin Elveston: You know that’s not how these Quests work. He’s got to hike there, the long way, or we’ll never find the place. I’m sure I can bring a Carpet and some tents, to make it more comfortable. I’d bring a chef, too, but I imagine Jenny can feed us all out of one of her small cauldrons.

Scarlet Jenny: This is a Quest, so there are sure to be obstacles. Bring whatever weapons you feel would be most useful, but do travel light. We will need a few specialty items. Elwin, can you have your kitchens bake up a large cake? And we will need two silver coins. [She looks at Obermaus]

Obermaus: Why do we have to take it out of my treasury? Elwin’s coffers are overflowing with silver.

Scarlet Jenny: Faery silver, yes. We need the real thing, so carry them in a sturdy pouch. And its only two coins, after all. You’re sure to pick up more than that on the way to the Underworld.

[Obermaus sulks]

Scarlet Jenny: Tekeli-Li can guide us; I trust him to know his way around the Underlands. Those of us who can fly—and that’s most of us--- will take turns scouting ahead for trouble, so we’re prepared when we meet it. Can we all be ready after breakfast? Say, sunrise?

Tekeli-Li: {Not my favorite time of day, but I’ll be there with gloom on.}

[The rest nod in agreement. The group adjourns until morning.]


[Dingbat follows the group—that is, the solitary Herokalos-- out of the cratered area where they gave been staying. Her only amusements are the rapidly dwindling food supplies, her electronic diary, and her Omnicom. Bandwidth is pretty slow, out her beyond the borders of the U.P., however. Still, she is able to receive a much-awaited holo-vid call.

Dingbat: Caduceus! I’ve been waiting for you to respond. Where are you?

Caduceus: I’m on Earth, at Legion HQ. The Legion rescue mission to Faerth is a no-go. Vetoed by The Holding Company and the ICC.

Dingbat: So who are they sending?

Caduceus: That’s just it; no one. They’re pretty upset that the live feed from Kalos’ ring cut out the minute he crossed over. There was quite a buildup over the pressnets about a Legionnaire entering a magical kingdom. I think the ICC was interested in getting some intelligence on magical worlds, as well. You know, they don’t have the best relationship with Mordru and the Sorcerer’s World. I’m afraid they’ve written him off. As far as they’re concerned, the latest Legion tryouts were a disaster: first Dimensio quits, and now Herokalos.

Dingbat: I don’t know what to say. I thought you were heroes. Can’t you just—well—come here yourselves? You do have a private Cruiser, after all.

Caduceus: The reality is, we can’t make a more without THC’s express approval. And no, the Cruiser isn’t ours, neither is the Clubhouse or Legion Headquarters. The Legion of Super-Heroes, Inc., is a wholly-owned subsidiary of The Holding Company. Even our names are trademarked.

Dingbat: It’s hard for me to tall what’s going on here. I believe he has found at least a couple of companions, and I think they are going to be helping him find the doorway out of the Faery World. If I can keep a close eye on him I should be able to follow him to the Underlands, and when he crosses over, we should be able to communicate. The Underlands aren’t magical—they transcend magic. I probably won’t be able to perceive any anthropomorphic personifications, but that’s probably a good thing, where Herokalos is going. I’ll keep you posted.

Caduceus: Sorry, no. THC says this is to be our last communication, and it’s going to be heavily edited for broadcast. I’m afraid this is the end of the story, unless Herokalos miraculously shows up at Legion Headquarters somehow.

Dingbat: This isn’t what I thought working with the Legion would be like.

[The Omnicom goes dark. Dingbat gets a bead on Herokalos, and sets out after him.]

[Herokalos and the Companions of the Fellowship begin a three-day journey. On the way, they fight their way through the requisite Giant Spiders and Carnivorous Plants. On the second day, they rest in a clearing beside the main road. After lunch (for those who eat) the Companions meet together to discuss their progress, and make sure they are on the right track. Herokalos wanders off, ultimately finding his way to a small, hidden cave. Something else else in the cave sparkles in the sun, and Herokalos is drawn to it. There is a crystal sarcophagus, which contains a young girl—either dead, or asleep on satin pillows. Overcome with curiosity, Herokalos pulls the sarcophagus out of the cave, and attempts to open the lid. It will not budge. FireDrake appears behind him.]

FireDrake: “Leave that alone! Nothing good can come from waking sleeping princesses.”

[Scarlet Jenny and Staggor now appear from the woods.]

Staggor: “I told you we would find him with FireDrake.”

Scarlet Jenny: “Herokalos, what do you have there? Oh, no. Not another sleeping princess.”

[Elwin Elveston appears, holding some sort of measuring device.]

Elwin: “Jenny, this is highly unusual. Ordinarily, these princesses put themselves to sleep for a few days—a year at most—before their ‘handsome prince’ finds and rescues them. But this one has been here much longer. According to my Thaumic Reader, the spell on this crystal is thousands of years old.”

FireDrake: “All the more reason to leave things as they are. Who knows who she is? There may be a good reason for her being kept on ice for so long.”

[But as the Companions debate, Herokalos tries once again to lift the lid. He strains terribly, then there is a shattering of crystal, and a release of mystic mists. The young girl sits up. She is dressed in a white tunic trimmed with gold, with golden sandals. Her hair is dark, and hangs in loose curls. She has turquoise butterfly wings tattooed around her eyes.]

Girl: “Where is this place? This is not Aiaia.”

Elwin: “Your Highness, you have been asleep for at least forty-five centuries. It is entirely possible that none of the lands you knew still exist.”

Girl: “I am Aion Capella, daughter of Telemachus, Lord of Ithaca, and grand-daughter of the arch-Sorceress Circe. I am no one’s ‘highness’, as I have renounced any claim to my father or mother’s lands, to seek my own fortune.”

Scarlet Jenny: “I recognize your ancestry, dear, and I believe you. You speak perfect, natural Greek from the appropriate era. My associate is quite correct, however. Troy has been gone for nearly five thousand years. Your country and your parents are also long gone, as is your grandfather Odysseus—although, I cannot speak to your immortal grandmother.”

Aion Capella: “This is grandmother’s doing! [She plucks at the satin pillows] This is the very couch I fell asleep on at her manse last night… (sighs) I suppose it is a million nights ago now.”

Scarlet Jenny” You have not only left your time and land, but your very world behind. This is the Realm of the Faery, and if you seek to make your own fortune, this is an excellent place to do so. We are the Companions of the Fellowship, and it is our business and pleasure to help questors such as yourself. We are a day and a half from the completion of another obligation, but if you will join us, we will aid you as well.”

Aion Capella: [perks up] “The Faery Countries? A truly magical land!? I should do well here. I thank you for you offer, but I really am intent on seeking my own fortune alone. If you would be so gracious as to point me in the direction of the nearest clear stream of water, however, I would be most grateful.”

[The Companions direct her as she has asked. Aion Capella heads off in the indicated direction, but first retrieves a rucksack from beneath the purple satin cushions of her former prison.]

FireDrake: “I still say we ought to have left well enough alone. She is entirely too optimistic and independent for my tastes, and has undoubtedly brought ancient magic with her, and is certain to prove a disruption.”

Scarlet Jenny: “And I am optimistic that she may yet need our help and guidance. A Quest for the future, yes?”

Herokalos “I thought she was nice. Her face has butterflies.”

Aion Capella

[The third day. Obermaus, Melchior, FireDrake, Scarlet Jenny, Odd Duck, and Tekeli-Li have been taking turns flying out and scouting the paths ahead.]

[Elwin Elveston sits cross-legged on his flying carpet, munching a stale, three-day-old croissant.]

Elwin: Melchior has not returned as scheduled. This may portend trouble.

Odd Duck: I’m up next. I’ll go carefully, and see if I can find our friend. Give me half an hour; if I’m not back… well, prepare for trouble.

[Odd Duck flies off. Herokalos and the Companions continue on their way. The path dead-ends at a great mirrored wall. Instantly assuming his dragon form, FireDrake soars up into the air.]

FireDrake: [calling down] It appears to be a great silver dome; I imagine it is some sort of barrier of protection.

[The remaining six examine the wall. As they do so, their mirror-images come to life, grasp them, and drag them inside the mirror. FireDrake, observing from above, immediately reverses course and flies back the way they came at top speed.]

* * *

Later…

[Herokalos and the seven companions are imprisoned through various methods in a small dungeon. They have undoubtedly been unconscious for some time. As they awaken, they see a young, balding man dressed in traditional wizard’s robes come down the hallway outside the dungeon. They also notice that many of their weapons are now stored on the other side of the bars.]

Magrag: As they say, ‘Awake at last!” I believe you are all acquainted here, yes? Not missing any of your friends?

[Addresses Scarlet Jenny]

My witchy associate, you were the hardest of them all. All those counter-charms and protection spells! And not an amulet or talisman to target. Still, I undid them all, and have them here [he holds up a round beaker full of shining liquid] as well as your staff—what a source of magic that was! And this wonderful little cauldron.

Scarlet Jenny: [She is chained to a wall] Be careful of that staff, warlock. There are old magicks there that you cannot possibly comprehend. Take care you do not damage it.

Magrag: I am no common warlock. I am Magrag, an Experimental Magician, and it is only my desire to—well, I have drained your ‘dangerous’ staff of all its magical energies. [Indicates large glowing cauldron beside the staff.] But so many other treasures. The elf has generously surrendered his magic carpet. The red-haired barbarian has surrendered his seven-league boots; the dwarf his fine flying cloak, and his—well, somewhat uncooperative axe. [He indicates Mitxi, chained to a wall outside, and apparently struggling mightily to escape.] The ghost and the shoggoth will make excellent servants, once I have broken their wills. [Melchior is encased in some sort of transparent shell; Tekeli-Li hangs chained to the wall, his protoplasmic body swallowed up into a deep well.] The duck, I frankly do not know what to do with. Roasted, perhaps, or in a stew. [Odd Duck is suspended in a transparent sphere similar to Melchior’s prison. He floats upside-down, and appears seriously perturbed. Magrog now addresses Herokalos.] And you, second barbarian, were almost as difficult as the witch. [Herokalos’ wrists and ankles are bound with fetters; he sits uncomfortably on the stone floor.] Your prodigious strength is not magical in nature, very odd indeed. And yet, my magic found a way to bind you! Still, I have not been able to remove your ring. Again, not completely magical in nature, but somehow bound to you. Well, I will just have to remove your finger. [holds up a wicked-looking knife.] Shall I refresh the sleeping-spell?

Herokalos: You can take my ring. You can take my ring. Please don’t hurt me. Just… just don’t take Stagger’s ring.

Scarlet Jenny: Quiet, you fool!

Magrag: Oh, dear, have I missed something? [He gestures, and human-sized Staggor, bound with chains both hand and foot to the wall, is levitated, flipped upside-down, and turned back to front.] Dear me, dear me. I was so impressed with the seven-league boots—a real collector’s item—I neglected to look further.

Herokalos: No! Please don’t take Stagger’s ring!

[At this, Magrag enters the dungeon. Pushing the others aside with a little extra magical energy, he begins to inspect Staggor’s ring hand. Then, as these things do, several things happen at once.]

[Dingbat has caught up with Herokalos, having mislaid him during his transport to Magrag’s castle. She can see not only Herokalos, but the shackles which hold him, and drain his strength. She cannot, however, see the chains that bind him, nor Magrag, the castle, nor the companions. Taking out her utility laser, she has been working (invisibly, to the others) on the shackles which bind Herokalos’ wrists. Just as she finishes slicing a neat break-line…]

(1) Herokalos snaps the shackles off his hands, then breaks the shackles from his feet. In the process, the chains holding them are shattered into broken links.
(2) Odd Duck, after much struggle, finally breaks out of the magical force-bubble which holds him, flies out of the dungeon, and bites through the tether holding Obermaus’ axe. The axe flies into the dungeon, and frees its master.
(3) Magrag succeeds in removing the ring from Staggor’s finger. The giant immediately returns to his full height, shattering the dungeon, and freeing the rest of the companions
(4) Now free, Scarlet Jenny summons her staff. It flies to her, but is intercepted by Magrag as he careens off the wall, thrown there by the growing giant.
(5) Herokalos grabs Jenny’s staff from Magrag, and breaks the staff over his head. He falls like an anvil in a Warner Brothers’ cartoon.
(6) Herokalos hands the half-staff he is holding to Jenny. It immediately re-grows to is full length. She dips the staff into Magrag’s shining cauldron, then picks up her own. The other companions reclaim their possessions.

Herokalos: I broke your staff, Jenny, that was right, wasn’t it?

Scarlet Jenny: Yes, you did well. Let’s get out of here, friends! [They all leave in their own particular manners. Obermaus takes a moment to fly through the castle, and brings out a medium-sized chest. He places it on Elwin Elveston’s flying carpet, and the group continues on its way. A couple of miles from the ruins of the castle, FireDrake joins the group.]

Elwin Elveston: You missed all the excitement.

FireDrake. You have to understand my position. I’m a coward.

Elwin Elveston: Fear not, we couldn’t expect more of you. We certainly don’t respect you any less.

FireDrake: Couldn’t, you mean.

* * *

Meanwhile, back in the wreck of the dungeon, Magrag awakens, cursing at the bump on his head. As his vision clears, he sees the other half of Scarlet Jenny’s staff, standing over him. It has grown to full size again, a two-meter stick. It has also grown skinny, twig-like arms and tiny legs. As Magrag seeks to leave the ruined dungeon, the staff interposes itself between him and the exit. Annoyed, the magician hurls an eldritch bolt, and the staff shatters into a dozen pieces. Magrag exits the dungeon and turns down the hall.
And a dozen full-sized staffs, with twig-like arms and tiny legs, follow him, grasping at his robes.
Still irritated and disoriented from the knot on his head, Magrag hurls a fireball at the staffs, and they explode in a flaming conflagration.
Tens of thousands of tiny flakes of ash sift onto the stone floor.
And tens of thousands of full-sized staffs grow from the ashes…

Cue music.

Her destination was obvious.

Herokalos had been moving in more or less a straight line towards an extinct volcano, a classic entrance to the Underworld. There would, no doubt, be an obvious cavern near the base descending deep beneath the crust of the planet. Dingbat used us the last of her flying belt’s battery power searching out the cave, but there it was. It could not have been more obvious if it had been marked with runes.
She had brought a miner’s lamp. No doubt to those not magically blind, the walls would be illuminated with a dim, eldritch glow from an unseen source. But she needed a lamp. Standing at the mouth of the cave, she looked out over the plain. Yes, there was Kalos, trudging steadily along, headed straight for this cave. She stepped away from the mouth, and found a relatively comfortable rock. “I will buy myself cushions for every chair in my apartment when I get home,” she vowed. She waited.

Herokalos entered the mouth of the cave. He was accompanied by a scarlet witch, and a perfectly ordinary pure white duck.

“You must be ‘Ding’,” said the witch. “We meet at last.”

“Hello, Ding,” said Herokalos.

“Quack,” said the duck.

“I ought to warn you,” said Dingbat, “I am magically blind, and can see you as you actually are.”

“Truly?” Scarlet Jenny asked. “And what am I?”

“From the Hag and the hungry Goblinne
“That into rags would rend me
“May the Spirits that stand by the Hangéd Man
“In the Book of the Moon defend me!”

“Amazing,” said Scarlet Jenny, “Not a spark of magic. And such a simple incantation! You are truly an extraordinary creature.”

“They call me Dingbat.”

“I am called Scarlet Jenny… and I am not a Hag. I’m a Crone.”

“I know the difference,” Dingbat replied, “but deeds will prove your words.”

“Ding, these are my friends,” Herokalos motioned all around himself. “Jenny and Duck, Mr. Donkey and Mr. Tickle, Doss and Stagger, and Milky and Elvis. Don’t be scared of Milky. He’s nice.”

Scarlet Jenny smiled. “And I wager you can see none of them.”

“I can see Herokalos, and you, and the duck,” Jenny replied. “I thank you most courteously for bringing my friend so far, but we can take it from here.”

“Oh, no,” Scarlet Jenny replied. “We came this far, we want to see it to the finish. You, however, may lead the way.”

Dingbat shrugged. There was only one way to go: down.

After traveling in silence for awhile, Scarlet Jenny asked, “Tell me, girl, or whatever you are, why have you chosen this dull-witted strongman as your companion on your quest for the Styx?”

Dingbat bristled. “This is his quest. I am his companion. And in my world, he has the wit of an angel. Faeryland disagrees with him.”

Scarlet Jenny smiled. It was a much nicer smile on her younger face.

At length, the path widened, until they found themselves in an immense cavern. Scattered around the floor were a few pieces of armor, several swords and shields, and a number of silver and gold chargers.

“Herokalos,” Dingbat said. “There should be a giant dog here, with three heads. Can you point out where it is?”

“That corner,” Herokalos pointed. Dingbat knelt down, opened her backpack, and took out a tessaract carrier, from which she removed a large cake on a round silver tray.

“We have one you could use,” Scarlet Jenny offered.

“No thanks, we’ve got is,” Dingbat replied. She carried it over to the corner Herokalos had pointed to.

* * *

A change of perspective:

Chained Cerberus, barking and growling at Herokalos and the Companions of the Fellowship, seems utterly oblivious to Dingbat. When a large pink cake suddenly appears before it, the heads begin fighting each other for a bite. Obermaus, meanwhile, is collecting the armor, weapons, and left-over cake trays.

“I believe my work is finished here,” Obermaus declares, and flies up, up, and away, out of the cavern.

* * *

Herokalos seems to have remembered something. “They gave me these,” he tells Dingbat, showing her two silver coins. Dingbat takes them from him, and returns them to Scarlet Jenny.

“Thank you,” Dingbat says. “We won’t be needing these after all.” Digging in her pocket, she hands Herokalos two silver coins of her own. “You can hang onto these now, I guess,” she says.

The group continue on past Cerberus, and down, and down.

The tunnel ends in another, even larger cavern. A deep, dry trench separates the party from the far wall.

* * *

From another perspective:

The tunnel ends in another, even larger cavern. A wide, black river separates the party from a distant, mist-obscured land.

* * *

“Herokalos, do you see a lake or river, with a boat and boatman,” Dingbat asks.

“Not boatman. It is a skeleton in black rags,” Herokalos replies.

“Give him your two coins,” says Dingbat, “and ask him the way to the River Styx.”

[Herokalos does so. The ferryman sweeps his arms wide, indicating that they have arrived at their destination. He then beckons to Herokalos with a crooked finger to enter the boat. Herokalos shrinks back. But it is Melchior who joins the Ferryman in the craft.]

Herokalos cries, “No, Milky, don’t go!”

But FireDrake consoles him: “He is only going over for a visit. He will be coming back to us soon enough.”

“You look different, Mr. Donkey,” Herokalos observes. FireDrake does indeed look different: his skin is fiery red, he has an arrow-pointed tail, and ram’s horns grow from his forehead.

“Yes,” FireDrake replies. “It is the proximity to Tartarus that does it.”

Scarlet Jenny addresses Dingbat: “I believe we have reached our destination.”

“Thank you, Jenny,” Dingbat replies.

* * *

Herokalos point of view:

[A terrible apparition materializes, clad in ghostly armour.]

The Shade of Achilles: “Oh proud and bold Herokalos, who callest thyself one of the Herculides, knowest thou me? Behold, I was in life Achilles, mightiest of the Achaeans, Captain of the host of the Myrmidons, son of great Peleus the King, and immortal Thetis, and a child of prophecy as well. So it was prophesied that my mother should bear a son greater than his father, and so I was. For this reason two Olympians withdrew from their pursuit of her. It was likewise prophesied by wise Themis that either I should live a long and peaceful life, and be immediately forgotten in death, or have but a brief mortal existence, and live forever in the memory of mankind. And so it was.
“Do not think that fame and prominence has brought me any comfort in death; I would rather live now as a poor farm-laborer, or as the slave of a cruel master, to own no land or property, or as a beggar with nothing at all in the way of a livelihood, than to rule here in the Elysian Fields as Lord of the Wasted Dead.
“And yet I would not return to Life again if given the chance, to live with there with the fear of Death impending every moment.”

[The fearsome visage drifts away, across the black river.]

Herokalos: “He was scary.”

Dingbat: “Who was, Kalos?”

Herokalos: “He was Achilles.”

[Another figure now materializes beside the river. Tall, black-robed, hooded, and carrying a long staff, Herokalos, and then Dingbat, gasp in astonishment]

Dingbat: [looking] “I can… see him?”

Death: “Everyone sees me eventually, Minn Lumiere. You have passed beyond the realms of magic, into a higher reality.”
“Herokalos Herculides, you have had an remarkably easy journey to these waters so far. But what you now face will be harder than you imagine. I may not see you again for a very long time, or this may be our only and last meeting. Listen carefully to your misenchanted guide if you wish for success. Or turn back now, and live a life Achilles might have envied.”

[Death gestures up, as a long passageway has opened above them. Faint sunlight trickles down from above. As the light passes the end of Death’s staff, the rays are sliced into rainbow iridescence by an invisible scythe blade. Death pulls back his hood. His face is not a skull, but the face of a slender and pale young man, with dark eyes and dark hair. Aside from the Eye of Horus tattoo, he rather resembles Neil Gaiman.* He seems a remarkably cheerful individual, considering his profession.]

[* Around the mid-32nd-century, due to a wager lost to the other Endless, Death and Dream exchanged bodies (that is appearances) for a century, while retaining their original powers and personalities. It is now near the end of the century-mark of their exchange, and they will be returning to their more usual forms in a few years. Historically, for a few months shortly after assuming his female form, Morpheus was a member of the Legion of Super-Heroes, as a new ‘Dream Girl’. However, she soon found it terribly tiresome, and returned entirely to the fantastical realm which it is her right to rule.]

[Dingbat now searches in her sack, and produces a spool of thread, about as thin and strong as fishing line.]

“Time to go swimming, Kalos,” she calls.

Herokalos is somewhat embarrassed. “I didn’t bring my swimsuit, Ding.”

“Skinny-dipping, then,” Dingbat replies, casually. “I’m a big girl, and you don’t have anything to show me that I haven’t already seen.”

Herokalos strips down. Dingbat winds a few strands of the string around his ring-hand, then unreels the thread as Herokalos walks down into the black water / empty ravine. The black water is ice-cold, and he tiptoes in slowly.

“You may have been wrong about his having nothing you haven’t already seen,” Scarlet Jenny remarks. Dingbat ignores her.

“Hold tight to the thread,” she instructs, “and turn around when the water is up to your neck. Now… place your empty hand under the water… unwind the thread from your hand, and wind it around the other… now see if you can wiggle that flight ring a little, so that water flows beneath it…”
“Now you’re ready to put your head under. Take a big gulp of water while you’re down there to wash out your insides. It’s even OK if you choke a little…”

Herokalos dips his head under the water, and takes a deep breath. It is like breathing cool mountain air. He is floating in a world of perfect blackness,
It is warm and soothing, like the last moments before sleep. His mind is as clear and black as the water. He begins to dream. But there is something pulling at his hand. Should he take the ring off? No, it is his other hand. Something else else pulling, tugging. There is something he is supposed to remember. Why is he holding this thread so tightly? Then he remembers. Dingbat! But he cannot see the surface, does not know where he is, which way is up, or down. So he follows the thread. Winding it in loops around his hand, he follows the gentle tug until his head breaks the surface…

The river is fiercely cold. Herokalos scrambles out.

“You have done well,” Scarlet Jenny congratulates Dingbat, as Herokalos dresses. “I hope to see you both again.”

“No offense to you, but I really hope not,” Dingbat replies. “Although Herokalos… he ate Faery Food. He is bound to the Faery Countries now, isn’t he?”

“Somewhat, perhaps, but it is probably not as bad as you think,” Scarlet Jenny replies. “I really am more Crone than Hag, and I really do have your friend’s best interests at heart. He is an extraordinary individual, as are you.”

“Thank you. We have a long journey ahead of us,” Dingbat answers, looking up the long passageway.

“Are you sure I can’t tempt you with just one Faery gift?” Scarlet Jenny offers an empty hand.

“Sorry, I can’t even see it,” Dingbat replies.

“Well, I had to try. It is in our nature. Come, Companions of the Fellowship! Home!” Scarlet Jenny returns the way she came.

“Quack,” offers the duck.

Dingbat and Herokalos exit the other way.

As Dingbat and Herokalos emerge from the cavern, Herokalos falls to his knees.

Herokalos: “Ding… I… Wow. My TBDchip just kicked back in. Do you know where we are?”

Dingbat: “I don’t know…”

Herokalos: “Oh, I recognize the place now. This is Themiscrya Island, a vacation resort on Earth. We should be able to Gate back to Metropolis easily.

[An impressive woman approaches from a short distance.]

Dingbat: “Mother!? Oh, wait, Kalos, describe the woman approaching us.”

Herokalos: “Tall, dignified, wearing a green cloak with silver embroidery, dark hair with a white forelock beginning to form…”

Dingbat: “Herokalos, allow me to introduce Madame Coppelia Tiercelet of the 96th Wizard’s Council of Sorcerer’s World. [whispers] You gave me quite a start, Mother. You dressed yourself magically this morning, but I can see you as you really are.”

Madame Tiercelet: “Yes, daughter, just one more reason you have been exiled to Earth; no magician likes to be seen for what they are.”
“However, I must congratulate you on your successful navigation of the Faery Lands. We on the Sorcerer’s World have been following your progress with interest. The Councils have been mightily impressed with your courage and heroism in this adventure. Please accept this small gift of appreciation from the citizens of the Sorcerer’s World.”

[She hands him a small, wrapped box scarcely large enough to contain an early 21st-century USB drive.]

Dingbat: “Are you sure you want to present this so… publicly, Mother? Sorcerers’ World is still viewed suspiciously in some quarters of the U.P. ”

Madame Tiercelet: “We have quietly arranged for your Flight Ring Broadcasting System to continue to be shut down for another half-an-hour. As it has been incommunicado for a week, no one will be particularly suspicious. We may all speak freely. It was the Mages of Tharn, working with the Coluans, who created the hardware nearly a century ago which allows certain applications of Legion Flight Rings to function even in wholly magical realms. Too bad we couldn’t include levitation. And UPGov has blindly replicated our design decade after decade.

“You have done well, daughter. Your charge has spent most of the last week in the central portion of the Eighth Zauberwald; if you wish further information, I would refer you to the first book of the Lagos Chronicles by Puck. The information there is somewhat outdated, however.
“Throughout his journey, he has had the almost constant companionship of a White Ghast, a Bloodwitch, a Demolong, a perfectly harmless and amiable Giant, a ghooric Shoggoth , a Champion Dwarf, the son of an exceptionally wealthy Greater Elf, and one of those extramoral Canards Etrange. So he has been with competent, if not necessarily ‘good’ company. You yourself were a good companion, preventing him from eating a Polychromatic Plum offered by a Sentient Trelien, and assisted in freeing them all from a sorcerer-magician.”

Dingbat: “But he did eat Faery Food, and a great deal of it.”

Madame Tiercelet: “True enough. For any ordinary individual, this would mean a prolonged servitude in Fairyland. However, Master Herculides was an innocent without his TBDchip, and different rules apply. Any vows he made unwittingly can hardly be justly enforced, although he will certainly need to journey back to Fairyland at some time in the future.”
[to Herokalos}
“That box I just handed you contains similar technology: a small homunculus, magically trained as a brain surgeon, and an even smaller magic crystal intended to be implanted into your TBDchip. This will allow it to continue to operate while in any magical or transcendental plane. Open the box, and allow the homunculus to install it shortly before the next time you return to Faeryland.”

“One more piece of advice: if you meet up with that helpful Drakomon again, continue to call him Mr. Donkey. He hates it.”

[And with that she is gone.]

The three-eyed Kryptonian babootch has a head resembling a sheep, a body resembling a turkey, arms resembling an orangutan, and a single stumpy leg extending from beneath its apteryx-like tail-feathers. A typical specimen stands about half a meter tall, and masses eight to ten kilograms. Incapable of true flight, (except under a yellow sun) it can glide short distances with its stubby wings. The third eye is located in the back of its head. All known domesticated specimens are descended from a small number of wild, tree-dwelling babootches originally found in the fragment of the Scarlet Jungles outside Kandor. (Now Rokyn)

Delicious with mint jelly.


– from Klar Ken T5477’s Travel Guide to the U.P.

Gillian Memnod, known to Legion holo-vid fans as Jill Frost, meditated in her quarters.

Eight years, now I have been training. I am capable of more than any Tharrian frostbender before me.

A fragment of the old nursery rhyme sang in her head: [i]Tharr the planet, Tha’ar the star

Eight years in the Legion of Super-Heroes. Assistant Legion Leader, second in command. But realistically? Virtually imprisoned at Legion Headquarters or in the Clubhouse most days. The missions they do send us on are trifling. Monitored twenty-four hours each day, seven days a week, three-hundred-sixty-five days a year. Ourselves, our surroundings, our sensations, our emotions. Everything but our innermost thoughts. And for what? We are a curiosity, an entertainment. Anything might appear on the holo-vids, anything edited in any way to entice or appeal to the viewers. But emotions can be controlled. My emotions can be controlled. No one need know what I feel.{/i}

She relaxed, allowing her feeling to flow, dampen, and quiet.

{i}All emotion is energy. Energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be changed, concentrated, re-focused, and made of use. {/i}

Snowdrop-3, Gillian’s albino housecat, was napping on the bed across the room. Gillian focused, sensing the patterns of heat in her pet. Dampening the heat-vibrations was easy, if done slowly. But now, she needed to be quick: the raw kinetic energy hitting her felt like a clap between two giant’s hands. She reached out again. Snowdrop-3 now slept at as near absolute zero as made no difference. Nitrogen frost formed on her fur. Gillian had to concentrate to keep the temperature down; the atmosphere was doing its best to warm Snowdrop-3 up again. She stood, placing her hand above the flash-frozen pet. Another clap of kinetic energy—odd, how she felt the slap same both ways—and the cat was restored to normal temperature. Gillian stroked the thick plush fur, just to make sure. Yes, alive and warm again.

She was not yet confident that she was ready to try it on human being. Of course, she could easily freeze a person, but bringing them back… If only she had a larger animal to experiment on. A small borlat, perhaps? Didn’t Earth-people keep them as pets? Or maybe a sheep? She would have to check out the local customs surreptitiously.

She took out her juggling balls. Did they ever broadcast her practicing her juggling in her room? If so, no one would guess her real purpose. The four balls flew, up, down. There was a moment when all four balls were in the air, moving opposite one another. Momentum was perfectly balanced. Just like temperature, molecules moving, net momentum perfectly zero. She sensed the moment—the balls froze in the air, then dropped into her hands. Not literally frozen: they were still warm, room temperature, but deprived, in an instant, of kinetic energy. It was easy now. If she could learn to shift momentum between objects of unequal masses and speeds… Well, she might bootstrap psychoglaciation into true telekinesis.

There was one more trick she had learned. She left her quarters, left the Clubhouse, went out onto the Plaza. She willed her flight-ring off. Then, gathering kinetic energy from the air around her, she pushed against the atmosphere, and flew. Contrails of liquid oxygen and nitrogen streamed behind her, evaporating into mist, frost, and fog. She let go of her emotions, and relished the feeling of soaring through the sky under her own power. [i]Let them broadcast this]/i], she said to herself.

Of course, no one would suspect that she was flying without a flight ring. A flight ring defined what it meant to be a Legionnaire.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------



I have realized that writing and posting the entire story sitting in my head would take years; I am just not up to it.

For those very few of you who may have been following the Legion of 3257, this is a brief outline of how the rest of the story plays out, as far as I have it developed.

Next Mission:

After Herokalos returns from Faeryland with new power, the Legion is sent to the California Nature Preserve, where prehistoric animals such as the Smilodons, Golden Grizzlies, Mastadons, and Giant Ground Sloths have been genetically re-created. Their mission is to rescue members of a group of back-to-nature, no-tech hippie commune that have illegally penetrated the preserve, and are attempting to create a community beneath the ruins of the Golden Gate Bridge towers. Despite the fact that they are idiots, the Legion rescues them.

Mission from the Past:
Karadox arrives from the year 3050, seeking help against an evil version of the Legion from another dimension. Among the members of this Anti-Legion are:
Invalidus, an evil version of Garridan Ranzz
Goldina, a half-Daxamite Yellow Lantern
Star Empress, with all the powers of the Adventure 282 Star Boy
Thundora, the daughter of Ol-Vir and Black Eve
A superintelligent Sun-Eater
Karadox is disgusted with the weakness of the 33rd-century Legion. She also discovers that while she has arrived in the future, it is not her future, as in this world Brainiac 5 and Supergirl never had children. She departs, re-entering the time stream, to find more powerful future Legions to assist her.

2nd Quest:
Meanwhile, it is revealed that Caduceus has been using his power to sustain the life of old Lauchlane McCauley, a major shareholder and director of THC. McCauley now insists that he be “healed”, once and for all, of his extreme old age. He promises a lighter hand upon the Legion if Caduceus cooperates.

THC approves the Legion’s “Quest for the Fountain of Youth.” Lieutenant Xyzkov expresses his opinion that it is a fool’s errand.

Caduceus and Saturday Girl travel to the Sorcerer’s World, where they meet with Mordru. He offers no assistance, but sends them to meet with Amulette the Collector, an expert in all kinds of historical magical talismans.
She explains that while there are numerous spells of longevity, they must be earned, learned, and cast by the subject, or there can be terrible side-effects. As: Olympian Nectar vs. the Water of Life.

Tin Soldier and S.E.P. Lad travel to the old Batcave, now a historical site / tourist trap, seeking the location of Lazarus Pits. Certain clues lead them the old Cave of Justice, original home of the Justice League, now also a historical site. They find Paradox waiting among the crowd there, who informs them that Ras al Ghul was at one time associated with the Legion, but has disappeared in a mysterious manner. He also informs them that the Lazarus Pits have all been destroyed, and that the Legion has learned that seeking to save the life of one whose time has come is generally a bad idea.

Herokalos and Dingbat return to Faerth, but are unsuccessful. They do, however, bring Aion Capella out of Faeryland with them.

Jill Frost travels alone to Witchaven to appeal to the ruling Coventry there. She leanrs that McCauley must seek for the Elixir of Life on his homeworld, or it will be of no effect.

The Legion, Dingbat and Aion Capella are allowed temporary use of a Time Bubble to travel back to 14th-century North America, to what was known in the 2Oth century as Florida. Locating the Fountain of Youth, they capture the elixir in the requisite brass bottle.

McCauley is provided with the sample, and informed that he must bathe in waters tinged with the elixir. Ignoring instructions, he drinks it, and de-ages all the way back to an infant. The lawyers for his estate contact Caduceus, and express their gratitude. Many of McCauley’s THC shares are liquidated on the open market.

A New Assignment:
The Legion journeys to Talok VIII with Leeta-96 aboard M.E.C.H. (The Museum of Engineering and Computer History) to act as an honor guard at the coronation of the new Malloran Emperor—an important governmental figurehead.
On board the giant starship, they meet the Museum Director and his android Docents.
They also meet Mr. Cobb on Talok. Leeta-96 indicates she may be aware of his true identity.
The coronation is interrupted by an attack by a dozen Daxamite Pirates. They overcome Leeta-96 and the Shadow Champion of Talok with uncanny ease.
The six Legionnaires make an attempt to stop the Pirates, but the battle is hopeless.
Suddenly, the Daxamites are mysteriously rendered unconscious. Leeta-96 and the Shadow Champion are revived, and M.E.C.H. has sufficient technology available to imprison the Pirates.
Mr. Cobb congratulates the Legion.

The Legion Expands
Bowing to popular opinion, THC allows another Legion Tryouts, allowing the Legion to double its membership to twelve.
Psimian, Toadstone, Gravelle, Skyboy, the Sigellian Kid, and Pogyrtoon are granted membership. Goblin Girl of Mars, and the Dove of Thanagar are inducted as reservists. (Introduction of Others: MetaGene, Elastiko, Double-Team)


Lieutenant Xyzkov contacts the Legion: the new members have been judged too powerful, and are all to be drafted into the UltraCorps Academy, and are to be expelled from the Legion. This includes the reservists; Lieutenant Xyzkov reminds the Legion that they have no authority to create a Legion Reserve.


LSV vs LSH
The Legion of Super-Villains attacks the six remaining Legionnaires; they are soundly defeated, and reveal, under questioning, that this was a plot apparently engineered by THC. Their contact was a man who called himself ‘Roxxas’. The LSH berates the LSV for their ignorance of history: Roxxas was an infamous space pirate and genocidal maniac from the 30th century.

Saturday Girl is hospitalized in the aftermath of the LSV attack. Herokalos accompanies her to Mars.

The four Legionnaires confront Lieutenant Xyzkov, who professes ignorance. He insists that ‘Roxxas’ was a double imposter: neither the famous pirate of three centuries ago, nor the representative of THC.

The destruction of LHQ
A host of Daxamite Pirates attack the Legion HQ, and a pitched battle with UltraCorp ensues on the Avenue of the Heroes.
The Legion Clubhouse and Legion Headquarters are entirely destroyed.

It is now clear from the equipment stolen from LHQ and previous attacks by the Pirates, that they are working with Murria to rebuild the Murrian Super-Computer, capable of granting any super-ability to any individual. It is expected that this super-weapon will allow Murria to become dominant in the U.P. Councils. Caduceus insists on the Legion being allowed to confront the Pirates on Murria: Xyzkov vetoes this: even the Ultracorps is no match for the hundreds of Daxamite Pirates now on Murria. When Caduceus tries to argue the merits, Xyzkov cuts him short, telling him he has an important meeting scheduled. THC has found the failing Legion shows no longer worth their investment; the franchise is being sold to a group of outside investors, whose representatives are meeting with Xyzkov in a few minutes.

The representatives turn out to be Paradox of Colu. Paradox informs Xyzkov that they have put together a coalition to purchase THC’s share in The Legion of Super-Heroes, Inc. Seven entities have each bought 7% of the outstanding LSH stock: (1) Paradox Investment Group; (2) The Korlon-Dryad Restoration Trust, Inc.; (3) CBR Ventures, a subsidiary of Cobb’s Brush and Reparo; (4) The Dawnstar Memorial Investment Fund; (5) The Administrators of the Sorcerer’s World Private Investment Fund; (6) The Corporation of the Hight Seer of Naltor; and (7) The Tryops Council of Mernl The shares put up for sale by McCauley’s guardians allowed

Xyzkov points out that this is only 49%: the share owned by THC. The other 51% is held by the agency heads of the board of the Interstellar Counter-Intelligence Corps. The heads are united in keeping the Legionnaires “safe”, and will not allow rash or impulsive behaviours.

He also notes that the Legion HQ and Clubhouse has been destroyed, and that the cleanup and rebuilding will represent a significant additional investment of both time and money from the seven partners. The Legion is essentially a net liability for the investors.

Paradox is surprised to learn that Xyzkov, supposedly an intelligence operative, is so far from being up-to-date. The character who masqueraded as “Roxxas” has in fact been revealed to be Commander Stone, Senior Head and Chair of the ICC. Commander Stone, furthermore, has been further revealed to be a disguised foreign agent of the Dominion. It is the Dominators that are funding the reconstruction of the Murrian Supercomputer, as well (by extension) as the Daxamite Pirates. In consequence of this, the shares of LSH, inc. held by the ICC have been temporarily converted in non-voting shares, until such time as this spy scandal is fully investigated—probably several years.

Furthermore, even when the ICC shares become active again, 2% of the outstanding shares of THCare currently held in a retirement trust fund for all hundred or so current and former Legionnaires—and the members of the trust themselves have voting rights over that 2% of shares.

As for the reconstruction of the Legion Clubhouse and HQ, Paradox enters a code on his belt, and the wreckage on Weisinger Plaza reassembles: including the two hundred-plus statues on the Avenue of the Heroes. He further reveals that no one, other than Paradox and the actual Legionnaires, knew of all the hidden storage units: in particular, the true Legion Armory still exists. He also reveals that hiding in an ordinary, but secret, tessaract storage unit, is… Dimensio. She had been part of the plan all along, to keep THC and the ICC from investigating the secrets of the LHQ too closely.

The Penultimate Battle
Paradox has developed a detailed plan which, using the current Legionnaires, the Legion Armory, and the Substitute Legion of Super-Heroes on Throon , would allow the United Planets to remove the Daxamite Pirates from Murria, as well as recover the stolen components for the Supercomputer.

If the ICC will allow the use of Ultracorps, thing would go even more smoothly.

* * *

[A few of the members of UltraCorps:]

Daximus & Mite of Daxam
Jonndo & Jaando of Malachandragar (Yellow Martians)
Skyboy & Skygirl, Planetary Champions of Kormo
SunHawk & MoonHawk, Planetary Champions of Thanagar
Superma & Superbo, Champions of the Almerac Diaspora
G’Well & Krystal, Planetary Champiosn of New Bokk
The Champion of Justice & Marveiia, the Scions of Shazam
Yin & Yang, Planetary Champion of Staryl
Cerebrum, Cerebellum & Medulla, Planetary Champions of Mernl
Hyperboy & Hypergirl, Planetary Champions of Oceana (Zoronians)
The Aardmartian Anteater & Hector Ham-and-Eggs of Earth C-minus-minus

4-Forces Girl
Gaziyth (Gzyt) of the Obsidian People of StoneWorld
Kryptonite Doomsboy
Myrwhyddensen
Quadrexx-64
Solar Woman
Ultraboy (Japanese version)
the Guardian of Malthus
Tri-Solar Boy (Vala Beh) of Dhor
Vartox XX of Valeron

* * *

The Murrian Defense Forces are weak, and would be unable to effectively assist the Daxamites in defense against the combined attack.

A comatose Indomitable Lad is also found on Murria, and is admitted in to a hospital on Colu, under Paradox’s care.

The Ultimate Battle
After the Pirates have been returned to DaxamGov, Paradox leaves the Wildfire Collective at Legion Headquarters, to act as an advisor.

Psimian, Toadstone, Gravelle, Skyboy, the Sigellian Kid, Pogyrtoon, Goblin Girl, the Dove, MetaGene, Elastiko, and Aion Capella are re-granted membership in the Legion, and an intensive training program begins. Wildfire reveals that there is another hidden individual in the storage tessaracts: he has been there for nearly two hundred and fifty years, until the Legion could put together a team appropriate to the upcoming mission.

He is the Quisling Dominator.

The Quisling explains that The One True God of the Dominators is an actual, living person.

At a time lost to memory, a mutant Dominator was born. Unlike other Dominators, who came with skins of blue or yellow, his skin was red. His mutation required to drain the life-force of others to live, rather like Superman’s Parasite. As he grew to maturity, he would drain the life from six or seven other Dominators each day. At one point he was isolated from the community, and fell into a coma. However, the “Cult of A’a, the Red God” revived him, calling those who provided is sustenance “The Holy Thousands”.

A’a outlived his Cult, but over the centuries established himself as “The One True God” of the Dominators, with a complex priesthood and cast system: the higher the cast, the larger the red dot on the forehead.

One day, a space-traveling super-hero who called himself Zetta, the Omniversal Man visited one of the twin Dominator worlds. Even from miles away, A’a could sense his power. When drained of energy, A’a gained Zetta’s omniversal powers. Zetta lasted nearly a year as a food source, but A’a craved more, and became obsessed with finding or creating other super-powered beings. The Dominators mounted a space program, and began to explore the Galaxy, seeking the origins of super-powers, and seeking to re-create them themselves. Perhaps fortunately for the Dominators, their physiology proved resistant to many super-powered modifications.

Then five or six centuries ago, A’a discovered the immortals. Enslaving first Oans and Zamorans, he gradually imprisoned the pantheons of a hundred worlds in his stronghold. Known as The Sanctuary of the One True God, it was the ultimate reason for the destruction of one of the Dominion twin homeworlds. Inspired by what they had learned of other sentient species, a group known as The Heretics attempted to free themselves from enslavement by their deadly , capricious master—with nuclear missles.

Billions died. A’a survived however, and The Sanctuary of the One True God became a self-contained Space Station.

The Quisling Dominator is a Heretic. He has sought out the Legion in the hope that they would help him accomplish the destruction of The One True God.

The Legion has waited a quarter of a millennium to find the right combination of powers to face A’a.

As the Dominators infiltrated the ICC, created Ultracorps, and began to systematically weaken the Legion, they were laying the groundwork for the destruction of their ‘god’. For the Legion needed a team that was not too strong: A’a could, after all, absorb their powers. The needed Legionnaires with powers that were difficult to use effectively, that required training, skill and perseverance. And, they also needed a few very specific powers. The Sigellian Kid was essential to their plans.

Tin Soldier is essentially paralyzed in battle by the First Law of Robotics, fundamental to his operating system: “No robot shall harm a sentient being, or, through inaction, allow a sentient being to come to harm.” Paradox, while unable to counter this fundamental programming, introduces Tin Soldier to the Solipsism Chip, which allows him to doubt the sentience of other beings, until he has gathered more evidence in favor of that proposition.

After months of training and planning, the attack was launched. Each of the eighteen Legionnaires was assigned to a team of five from the Substitute Legion of Super-Heroes of Throon. Each team piloted a small, pyramidal ship towards the Dominion Homeworld. In addition, there were eighteen other ships. Thirty-six ships, one hundred and ninety-eight Substitutes, and eighteen Legionnaires.

Cloaked by Paradox’s technology, the ships were orbiting the Dominator Homeworld before they were even detected. Pursued by the Dominion Fleet, the thirty-six ships scattered and fled—but not before releasing nineteen capsules which made their way to the Sanctuary of A’a.

Entering United Planets space, the Dominion Fleet was routed by UltraCorps. This phase of the mission was completed without loss of life.

When within an appropriate distance, the nineteen capsules teleport the Legionnaires—and one Substitute—into the Sanctuary. Tin Soldier attacks A’a first, his inertron body highly resistant to damage.

“Fools!” the immortal Dominator cries. “I have access to the power of a thousand gods!”

And indeed, the Legionnaires see, preserved in individual pods, row after row of immortals. Some are recognizable: Vidar, Vili, and Ve, Magni and Modi, Apollo, Poseidon, Ouranos and Phlaudteos; Vandal Savage and King Kull, the Phantom Stranger, Blind Ekron of Venegar, the Highfather of New Genesis: and more-- a thousand gods from a hundred worlds.

A’a hesitates. He has been gorging himself for centuries, yet here stands what, in his childhood would only have sustained him for a couple of days. Holding them immobile with his immense telekinetic ability, he debates within himself: How to destroy them? How best to make an example.

(The Legionnaires are scattered throughout the Sanctuary. However, as A’a can appear in more than one place at a time, he faces each Legionnaire individually.)

But the One True God has mistaken the Legion’s strategy. The direct attack is only a distraction. The side-effect of their powers is to destroy the flora-based technology within the flying fortress.

Jill Frost, is applying her cold-generating powers to the pods which hold the immortals. MetaGene, duplicating the Tharrian genome, is doing the same. The Sigellian Kid and Anti-Chlorophyll Kid, whose powers inhibit the growth of plant life, are broadcasting their powers as hard as they can. The others also using their abilities to indirectly attack the biologically-based technology.

(Saturday Girl is serving as a distraction: she appears to be quite powerful, but A’a is unable to access her powers: she is in her ‘normal’ Terran phase. Herokalos is also problematic: his peculiar blend of genetics, computer technology, and magic are difficult and slippery.)

It is only a matter of minutes, but half a dozen gods are freed from their captivity. Swiftly regaining their powers, they free another half-dozen, then a dozen, then a hundred, then hundreds. They turn their immortal powers upon the god of the Dominators. He had brought them together carefully, one at a time, weakened and attenuated. Now he faces their combined wrath. In a brief time, it is over.

But it is not over for the Dominion. The battle in the heavens has been witnessed by the entire world, as the alien gods rejoice in their freedom and victory. There is war between the Hierarchy and the Heretics. This will not end soon.

“I have hired you to help me start a war. It is a prestigious line of work, with a long and glorious tradition.” – Vizzini, the Princess Bride

As the immortals disperse back to their own worlds, several of the Legionnaires receive gifts. Saturday Girl and Herokalos receive full Daxamite-level powers, without Daxamite weaknesses. S.E.P. Kid gains the ability to turn his power off. Tin Soldier is transformed into a “real boy”, although strangely keeping his robotic abilities: skin as invulnerable as inertron, a computer mind, and the ability to conjure up a plethora of tasty frozen dessert treats. Other Legionnaires receive other, more subtle gifts.


That is the end of this arc. However, in order to tell the story properly, we must have side-trips in which we tell the stories of the Substitute Legion of Super-Heroes on Throon, and work in a number of other set-ups, foreshadowings, and mythologies.



In the future, S.E.P. Kid and the Dove discover their powers beautifully complement one another, and assist the Highfather in regaining the throne of New New Genesis from Rigel Kent, the son of Orion. They eventually inherit the mantle of Doctor Fate, merging together into that hero; an interesting dynamic, as they are each gay.

Herokalos and Saturday Girl join the new UltraCorps, become romantically involved, eventually marry, and have a daughter.

Pogyrtoon and Goblin Girl are briefly romantically involved, but nothing comes of it.

Gravelle is revealed to be a teen-aged, single mom: she has been hiding her daughter by merging together their pebbly forms.

The Legion becomes involved in a Khundish Rebellion, the Khundian Worlds having joined the U.P. in the last century.

The Legion is embroiled in a faery-war on Faerth against their will, but gains two new members: Cabala and Caballero.

Meanwhile, on the Sorcerer’s World, there are the sagas of Ozmarda, Jon Falstaff, Volaille & Chanticleer, the continuing romance of Mordru and Blok, and their son Argenius… it just goes on and on.

Approximately one hundred million people died in 2016.

Most of them I did not know.

I knew about more than I knew personally.

Some of each were important to me.

I am afraid I find myself increasingly unable to retain the massive and ever-shifting history of the DC Universe in my mind, and find it increasingly difficult to focus on a writing project.

I may never be able to complete the outlines, let alone the final stories, for these works in process.

Rainbow Girl and Wildfire
… Dori’s story continues, when she marries Wildfire in the 32nd century. Sorry, Emily Sivana.

Monstress Becomes Electra
… Sequel to I, Monstress, Monstress returns to Xanthu to avenge the death of her father at the hands of Robotica. Meanwhile, another Monstress joins the New Uncanny Amazers in a world under re-construction.

Earth C-minus in the Earth-K paracosm (and the 31st century)
… Featuring the Legion of Super-Pets, including Squerl Dox, Fawnstar, and Blok Lobster. Also an appearance by the 20th-century villain, Hector Ham-and-Eggs.

The Inferior Five Hundred
… The Inferior Fives of one hundred worlds, including the Anti-Matter Universe, Earth-C-minus-twelve, the necromaniacal Infieri Five, the god-like Infinite Five, and several other versions of the super-hero group, some of whom are actually competent, go toe-to-toe with the Anti-Monitor. And fail.

Timber Wolf at Fifty
… The middle-aged Timber Wolf, in retirement at fifty on Orando, receives a visit from Dr. Zan Orbal, and discusses his medical history.

Gamboge and Brother Sparrow
… Brother Sparrow is Alun Sur, the Ungaran descendant of Abin Sur. He wields both a blue and a green power ring. Gamboge is a member of the Yellow Lantern Corps from the Dominionr Homeworld.

Themelion (Gemworld Returns)
… Mysa Nal and the retired Ambassador Relnic moderate a dispute between the twelve worlds which comprise the Gemworld Diaspora: Homo Magi and Faery displaced to our universe when the original Gemworld was destroyed. Still in a constant state of aggression and upheaval.

Of All The Gin Joints, On All The Planets, In All The Galaxy, You Walk Into Mine?
… Four-hundred-year-old Querl Dox finally catches up with fourteen-hundred-year-old Kara Zor-El

UPTF Wars: The war between the United Planets and the Tellarite Federation
… The Tellarite Federation includes the Tellarite Worlds, Gammorea, the Pyggors of Va’Alor, and Planet 318 (home to the invaders from Wonder Woman #318)

The Hundred-Acre Universe
… Ten alien worlds, inhabited by sapient Bears, Piglets, Eeyores, Rabbits. Wols, Kangas, Tiggers, Heffalumps, Woozles, and Jagulars.

Gwynplaine and Fledermaus
… summary of the popular 31st-century opera. Actually written in the 29th century, during the great Operatic Renaissance. Relates the story of the heroic Jacob Gwynplaine, a Sherlock-Holmes type character, and his companion, Dr. Quinzel, in their battle against the assassins-for-hire known as Fledermaus and Rubekulo. Features the soaring aria, “Verbrecher Sind Feigen Und Abergläubisch”.

The outlines are sufficiently mind-expanding. Readers can fill in the blanks.

I'm surprised that Brin would retire at 50. Physical breakdown? Or jus retire from the Legion and on to some other endeavour?

So many real-life stories of people reconnecting in old age and finding happiness - does the aged Querl and Kara story have a happy ending, or is it Remains of the Day?

I'd like to think that The Hundred-Acre Universe has space for creatures who mess about in boats, at least for a crossover chapter.

Well, Klar, if you ever feel like finishing the story let me know. My schedule on this site is going to be light this month as my key goal is going to be to entertain the users with Lego Star Wars commentary (and maybe screenshots and video).

Brin is sort of forced to retire by the Orakills. Unable to disctract himself with adventuring, he has become more and more irritiated by his continual Zuunium-powered bizarre transformations.

And then there are the nightmares.



Oh, my, yes, a happy ending. For a while, at least. Coluans appear to have a lifespan of 700-800 years, and even Brainy's twelfth-level ancestors were never able to extend that by much. Querl's grandfather, for instance, never makes an appearance in the 3Oth century.

Superman, on the other hand, in at least one alternate future, survives until at least the 864th century, one hundred times the aforementions Coluan lifespan. So Kara will almost surely outlive her husband.



Oh, yes definitely. Toad and Rat and Mole are all cut from the same fine cloth as Pooh.

“The smell of that buttered toast simply spoke to Toad, and with no uncertain voice; talked of warm kitchens, of breakfasts on bright frosty mornings, of cozy parlour firesides on winter evenings, when one's ramble was over and slippered feet were propped on the fender; of the purring of contented cats, and the twitter of sleepy canaries.”

"What's inside it?" asked the Mole, wriggling with curiosity.
"There's cold chicken inside it," replied the Rat briefly:
"coldtonguecoldhamcoldbeefpickledgherkinssaladfrenchrolls–
cresssandwichespottedmeatgingerbeerlemonadesodawater—"
"O stop, stop!" cried the Mole in ecstasies. "This is too much!"