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Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773 |
Dear internet,
I love my job im a ghost artist at a company that is about 30 min way from my house, i draw comics. i love my job my boss is great and i feel that they would do any thing for me , after only knowing them for two weeks they called me family, i went with them to visit the in laws..
three days ago my boss informed me that him and his wife are going to be moving to L A.
they want me to come with them, i would like to go, but that is a huge move i live on the East coast they are moving to the other side of the country.
with what they pay me i pretty sure i wont be able to live on my own, so i would have to live with them.. ( i dont know if they would want that)
my biggest fear about going is say i go and things dont work out, i will be on the other side of the country in a city that i will know no one in. if i go but it might be hell to get back should things not work. but if things work out that could be a huge HUGE step for my career
my second biggest fear is if i dont go this i will be something i would always regret for the rest of my life. i dont want to look back at my life and wonder. 'if i had only gone to la.'
im 23 years old, on a good day i feel 15. most days im like a 12 year that can buy booze. who spends half my day thinking about batman and cartoons. i am not an adult enough to make this life decision that is going to change my life.
Help me... i would love to here your opinions and questions you think i should ask my boss (im going to make a list of questions before i make any decisions )
thanks
[Edited title to conform with rule 11. Attention seeking posts. - Nightcrawler]
  /l、 ゙(゚、 。 7  l、゙ ~ヽ  じしf_, )ノ
i do commissions
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 6,775 |
Well...
I'm not exactly an expert on these things, but the best I can say is try and right a list of the pros and cons.
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675
space mutineer & purveyor of quality sammitches
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space mutineer & purveyor of quality sammitches
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675 |
It sounds like a great opportunity to me. The only thing that gives me pause is that you've known these folks a very short time.
Is there a good friend or group of friends near you who could store/house most of your stuff while you do a "trial run" of the LA area? That way, you could see how you like it without completely pulling up roots.
LA is expensive, but there are boards like LJ where you might find groups of people already living there who can steer you towards affordable places to live, shop, etc.
"I wish I was young and free like you. Take soap." -- Sam Levenson
Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on DeviantArt! Drop by and tell me that I sent you. *updated often!*
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773 |
oh ive known them for a few years now
no my closet friend in Ca is 8 hours away in San Fransisco
  /l、 ゙(゚、 。 7  l、゙ ~ヽ  じしf_, )ノ
i do commissions
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675
space mutineer & purveyor of quality sammitches
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space mutineer & purveyor of quality sammitches
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 25,675 |
Oh, I meant: is there somebody where you're living now that could store anything you wouldn't need to take out there with you right away?
Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on DeviantArt! Drop by and tell me that I sent you. *updated often!*
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773 |
well this isnt happening for a few months like October. im pretty sure my parents wouldn't mind holding my stuff for a few month but that is about it i would have to come back and send my stuff my self and send it to me myself. they dont like me that much and they get bitchy when i ask them to do things
  /l、 ゙(゚、 。 7  l、゙ ~ヽ  じしf_, )ノ
i do commissions
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141
Not much between despair and ecstacy
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Not much between despair and ecstacy
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 24,141 |
kf2f:
Let me get this straight: You've worked for this company for only two weeks, yet they call you "family" and want you to move to the West Coast with them?
You are a ghost artist, which means you get no credit for what you do and can easily be replaced?
They are possibly giving up comics work to work in films? Moreover, you may have to live with them when you move to L.A.?
I guess my question to you at this point is, what is the likelihood of the company being able to succeed in Hollywood? You haven't said what comics they (and you) draw? Are these comics for a major company or a small, unknown publisher? Do they have something they can show you which suggests that this move will likely work out for your benefit? (In other words, do they have job contacts, jobs lined up, etc.?)
As romantic as it sounds to move to the West Coast and break into films, it also sounds (based on what you've written) as if it might be somewhat shady. I dunno: If you're 23 and have no other ties at home, it might be worth the adventure of taking the risk. But, me, I'd want a better indication that work will be available before moving.
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,205
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,205 |
I struggled with a similar decision when I was about your age and decided to move from Missouri to California - with no job or money. I had a boyfriend, though, and a few friends already in CA. One of my big hang ups was the lack of immediate cash. A turning point was when a friend who had made the move earlier said to me, "Come on, Jerry. You can be poor in California or you can be poor in Missouri. Which one sounds more fun?" That made sense to me.
I only stayed in California for five years. The boyfriend and I broke up within six months. I've never regretted the move. I saw and did lots of wonderful things and learned a lot about myself. That's not to say that it didn't get hard, lonely or scary at times. It's a big decision. The best advise I can give is to follow your heart, and never regret the choice that you ultimately make. There is no right or wrong answer here - just different paths. Make the most of whichever path you choose.
Beauty's where you find it. Not just where you bump and grind it.
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773
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OP
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773 |
okay let me clarify when i was working for them for two weeks they were calling me family. i've been with them for a few years
im also an assistant to my boss as well. geting replaced is something that could happen if i dont go and that has me worried
i dont know that is something we have to talk about, he dropped his bomb on me like three days ago and i havent had a chance to go over all every thing yet
i dont know, my boss and his wife make things happen for them i pretty confident they will go places
  /l、 ゙(゚、 。 7  l、゙ ~ヽ  じしf_, )ノ
i do commissions
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 10,215
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 10,215 |
GO! Do it! Take the risk! Have a LOT of fun!!! Work hard!
Listen, if I had that opportunity at 23, I'd be ALL over it! You have a LOT of time to work out the logistics. You should start with building up your portfolio and resume, then get and keep an open mind.
Also, consider getting the job offer and living arrangement deal on paper. If that insults them, it's a red flag.
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,322
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,322 |
My question is, what is keeping you where you are now? Is there a compelling reason for you to stay? You say you're not on good terms with your family, so it's not that. Your job is gone once they move to California, so it can't be that. If you believe you can trust these people and feel you have some job security working with them, then it seems like fear is the main reason for staying where you are. Is that a good enough reason? Only you can answer that one.
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081 |
I've rejected a lot of opportunities due to familiy ties.
If you have no such ties keeping you, why not give it a whirl?
One thing I WOULD do:
Start a "JUST IN CASE THIS ALL GOES INTO THE CRAPPER AND I NEED TO GO HOME" savings account-- NOW.
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634
Bold Flavors
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Bold Flavors
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634 |
I think you're getting some great advice. I'd only add this: you're 23, not married or engaged and you might never get a chance like this again. On the other hand, its a big change and I'm sure it can get lonely. At the very least, you'll have facebook, here (LW) and other online forums to keep some sort of support system where you can at least feel connected to people. That can help you feel "safe" in the beginning though that's no substitute for real human interaction, which I'm sure that will happen soon after your arrival. Follow your heart on this one (And let us know how it goes!)
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773
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OP
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ive been in this should i go stay haze for weeks
but over the course of these few weeks ive had to think about this ive come to this conclusion. wait until i know more about where they are going to live, if they still want to do comics if they will let me live with them until i find my own place. things of that nature be for i commit myself to this.
Now this brings me to the point of this entry.
I FUCKING HATE MY FAMILY!
it started with my dad this morning he left me siting in 84 degree weather for over twenty minutes cause he left his cell phone home. mean while since im working this week from my house to my family that means im doing nothing all week and i can stand around for hours waiting for them.
then my boss sends me to his studio to reset his internet connection thats 30 min in the car both fucking ways, while it sucked i need to do that i did that for work.
i walk in the door and my step mom is pissed cause my cat has hair and she leaves it on things when she sits on them..and i need to get the cat to stop..My step mom is a Psycho path. and i know every step kid on the planet say that bout there step parents but im not joking about mine, she latter sent me to bjs today to get snacks for my sister and the fucking exchange students. and literally screamed on the top of her lungs that i bought the wrong ones and i had to go back exchange them right then and there.
BJ's is 45 minutes away.. my car was having issues on the way back from the studio.i bought two huge bags of chip.. her excuse is that a team can't eat out of of a bag. since when the fuck are teenagers to good to eat out of a fucking bowel or a bag???
you know the only thing that makes me feel good when im feeling this shity...that if all goes according to plan there will be Three hour time Zone difference . a five hour plan ride., 11 states. 2,776 miles of solid land between my parents and me
  /l、 ゙(゚、 。 7  l、゙ ~ヽ  じしf_, )ノ
i do commissions
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,322
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 4,322 |
Jeepers! You and Sarcasm Kid are starting to sound exactly alike!! Maybe you guys should, like, date or something.
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Re: Considering moving across the country
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Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 773
Active
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OP
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Posts: 773 |
im trying to cut down on my bitching of them. they are who they are and once i move to either cali or nj i wont have to deal with them. my family wont drive an hour and a half to see me so five hour plan ride is out of the question. either way im covered on not having to worry about them for a while.. i was just having a bad day and the thought of being close to 3000 miles away made me soo happy
and i dont date people who have bad relationship with their family. i have enough trouble handling the problems with my own. my parents say horrible things to my guest/friends when they come over. i can't handle that from someone im dating family.
i dont hate my family all the time, i love my little sisters and my dad isn't that bad. and even my step mom has her moments of not being a total pain. i know the reason they dont support my job choice is because its not 100% secure and i dont have health care.
they want me to be independent, they want me not to worry if i get sick. the biggest problem is they want me to go about it their way and not mine.
they dont get that im just starting out in my field, that it takes a few years to really brake in. dont want to know how it works they dont listen when i tell them. they think im to naive and just cause my boss is attractive and nice that im an idiot for trusting him
i also know that alot of the time when they are mad at me its not because of what ever i just did it beacuse when i couldn't take living with them any more and moved out when i was in 7th grade, and they are still bitter
its just a bad environment that i would be better far way from, both my older brother and sister tried this same thing my brother moved to FL olny to move back home a few years latter, same with my sister she moved to Ireland only to move back home two years latter.
if i move to nj i know i wont have to move back to my parents if things get too rough. i cant say the same for la. i dont ever want to move back home again so failing in la isn't something i want to deal with
  /l、 ゙(゚、 。 7  l、゙ ~ヽ  じしf_, )ノ
i do commissions
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