114. I got beer. You wanna?
Posted by cleome46 on :
rickshaw1, the bad pickup lines thread is that way!!
Posted by cleome46 on :
113...
Click Here For A Spoiler...bad pickup lines Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
112. I'm already one and, of course, I'm Rick's role model. Posted by Viridis Lament on :
111. It'll be easier to keep the damn kids of his lawn
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
110. Cranky AND determined.
Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
109. The rest of the Time Trappers on the board are too nice to retcon him out of existence.
Posted by He Who Wanders on :
108. Innovative reverse list makes a great campaign strategy.
Posted by Quislet, Esq on :
107. Time Trapper rickshaw1 came back in time and told him how it happened. All I overheard was "BBQed Erin Gray"
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
106. Rickshaw plans to post the next 105 reasons himself, dramatically adding to his post count.
Posted by He Who Wanders on :
105. He is able to compensate when plans go astray.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
104. He can destroy the alternate timelines that the rest of us are too squeamish to touch.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
103. With my plan, I will survive the zombie apocalypse.
Posted by lowercase mllash on :
102. Increased pithiness
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
101. because i will beat a (&$$^^#%^%# with another *(&*&$$^&% !
Posted by Quislet, Esq on :
quote:Originally posted by rickshaw1: 103. With my plan, I will survive the zombie apocalypse.
Unfortunately (for us) the plan calls for rickshaw1 to push each of us in front of an attacking zombie.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
Mawma always said I'm coldhearted.
Posted by Quislet, Esq on :
Coldhearted and hotblooded. How does that happen?
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
Skillz baby, Skillz!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
100. Because rickshaw is secretly emperor supreme of the zombies.
^ I knew it! That explains the hotbloodedness and coldheartedness
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
99. Because when my secret status as emperor of Zombies was discovered, i caught the rat and turned them into a potted fern! *that's raht, ah'm lookin' at'chew!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
98. I'm slow to anger, but when I do, timelines and realities COLLIDE!
Posted by He Who Wanders on :
97. Bottles of beer on the wall, 97 bottles of beer, and if one of them should happen to fall. . . well if Rick's a Time Trapper, that bottle will take 950 years to hit the floor.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
96. Because he's just so good at coming up with horrible musings designed to torture innocent, unsuspecting mortals.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
95. 'cause Janey's gotta gun, but I took it from her. Then we sat down, had a nice cuppa joe, chatted sensibly about the things in her life she needed to change to feel better about herself, change the direction, and find true happiness.
Then I piddled in her potted plant on the way out her door.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
94. I am the SINGLE GREATEST POSTER OF LEGIONWORLD IN ONE MONTH! *High falsetto voice of afro-ed guy from accepted... "Top that, Bitch ezzzzzzz".
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
93. Cause my moobs bring absolutely no one to the yard.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
92. Cause you used the word "moob".
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
91. Because "moob" backwards is "boom" and I like watching mythbusters blow shit up. Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
90. Because watching Mythbusters adds to his coolness factor
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
89. I don't always drink beer, but when I do, i get piss drunk!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
88. Rickshaw is a lot of fun when he's piss drunk. He always deages himself and flings poop everywhere.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
87. I ain't drunk enough to say.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
86. Summons crazy characters from all over history and has them battle it out to unconsciousness in the arena.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
85. Does NOT write bad fanfic involving slave costume Leia.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
84. Sabotaged the post counts of everyone within 2000 posts of becoming a Trapper.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
83. Has already purchased a nice little space rock at the end of time and only has 23 more payments to make before that baby is all mine.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
82. Has promised to spring for Trapper robes in various colors and designs, including entropy black, plaid, polka-dot, starfield and rainbow.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
81. Promises to end a world wide dependency on Hoo-Hoo's.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
80. Will open a rabbit shelter of space (hey, he'll get my vote for induction)
Posted by cleome46 on :
'79 - Ivory-white Dodge Dart-- OF SPACE!
(I don't know why he added those giant fins to the rear, though.)
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
78. Free corn and ribs for every meal!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
77. Will make cornbread, mustard, hog jowls and pickled pigs feet the official Time Trapper Evening Meal.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
76. And he'll give us bottles of his special mustard as Christmas presents.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
75. And to my enemies I'll give my very own special mustard "gas".
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
74. You can tell him apart from the other Time Trappers by his special checkered robes and the smell of tobacco surrounding him.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
73. My stinky cigars will eventually kill all the other time trappers despite their infinite powers.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
72. All the other Trappers are feeling generous this century.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
71. Because I promise to bring back the glamor from the fifties back in full force. Men will like it because of the buxom babes in torpedo brassiere's, and women will love it because they could actually eat back then and still be considered sexy, and gay men will love it because they get fabulous women's fashions to talk about.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
70. He's already created his own statue, complete with Time Trapper robes.
Posted by cleome46 on :
69. A promise of really disturbing and yet compelling new time-related innuendos-- thousands of 'em!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
68. Plus, he'll share his horrible thoughts at every Time Trapper dinner!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
67. Cuz' ah spake sa ellerquintly!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
66. Diligently thinks of new thread ideas which appeal to the majority of posters
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
65. Shamelessly cribs ideas from other folks to create new and interesting thread ideas which appeal to the majority of posters.
Posted by cleome46 on :
64. Will revive the collectables market for Pogs and Beanie Babies in order to put all the other Trappers through Grad School.
(Yeah, we'll still all end up Assistant Managers down at Burger Chew™, but at least we'll have something classy to display in our beater cars next to the fuzzy dice and the tiny plastic icon of Cos in a bustier.)
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
63. Alters time to make the bustier THE fashion of choice for men in the 31st century, delighting the majority of gay men and straight women.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
62. I will put a Winachik in every pot!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
61. Actually knows what a Winachik is (I admit I don't!)
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
60. Did NOT keep and use item 69 in this list for himself and some really bad innuendo. Prefere really GOOD innuendo.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
59. Able to pull old list items from memory and use them to spawn newer lists!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
58. I'll just keep makin shit up til I get there.
Posted by He Who Wanders on :
57. If Heinz has 57 varieties, Rick should, too!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
56. Even the sh * t he makes up has some sense to it
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
55. MY $#!+ makes all the legionnaires run!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
54. And not into the yard, either.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
53. Will flip the switch and all year long it's halloween, and one day a year it 'taint!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
52. Will wear a different costume every day that it's Halloween!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
51. Will revenge meself on those that have done me wro...ooooh.... pudding.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
50. Will use his powers to retcon out all annoying, terrible and distasteful events in Legion comics history.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
49. Will retroactively wipe out all steroids ever in Baseball and let the true records stand. Then, Introduce Barry Bonds to The Persuader.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
48. Will create a pocket universe where bunnies reign supreme!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
47. Will invade bunny universe and make them into lunch. Damn cute and fluffy bunnies.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
^ As a bunny lover, I shall cease support for your quest to become a Time Trapper!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
46. Turns all politicians used to screwing over the country into playboy bunnies. Now they will be the ones getting screwed over.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
45. ... with jackhammers.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
44. Immediately puts all Jackhammers on sale for only $1.99 per. No limits on purchase.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
43. And makes sure the jackhammers are available in designer colors and with rubber pads on the handles.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
42. I'll let Adams field this one.
Posted by cleome46 on :
41. Oh, why not?
Posted by He Who Wanders on :
40. You're in the Top 40 home stretch!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
39. Because Casey Kaseem needs something to be remembered by.
Posted by Jerry on :
38. ...because you rock the charts.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
37.... because I DO rock the charts, but only because they are published in a magazine and I shake the rack. Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
36. Because he is so good at counting backwards.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
35. Because I'll be the first Bassackwards Trapper! And I'll get John, MD. kicked off the air. Never did like that show!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
34. Because I vow as Benevolent Supreme Dictator of the Entire Universe as Time Trapper, that all legion elections will be Free From Acrimony!
Posted by Viridis Lament on :
33. ...because he owns the rights to Mearl's Space Cannon
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
32. Because I'll take the entire Legionworld crew to Cowboys Feng's Space Bar and Grill... and it's open bar!
Posted by cleome46 on :
31. Trips to Baskin-Robbins for the complementary dessert of your choice, if you vote him in.
Click Here For A SpoilerI want that cake that looks like a Thanksgiving Turkey! Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
30. He can reverse the rot on all the tasty food in the garbage.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
29. I will never back down from an eating challenge of JIF and brownies. Time Trappers should stick to their convictions.
Posted by cleome46 on :
28. Eschews Winter Squash, the poor fool. This means tons more for the rest of us! Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
27. Provides free tissues to the other Trappers at their millenial meetings.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
26. Vows to not use Jupiter as a ball in the Cosmic game of Galaxyball. Will instead use Uranus.
Posted by Legion Tracker on :
25. Because <sigh of relief> he's more interested in Uranus than mine.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
24. Because his mighty abilities allow him to roll Uranus. I thought it was physically impossible to do so.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
23. Spliff's fer everyone from Denver. *That'll teach the little basta....ahem. Yes, that will win their lov...damnit, internal soliloquy...internal.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
22. His internal soliloquies remain entertaining even after a dozen years.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
21. Has decided that crazy is more fun than acting normal, so will let the crazy out for everyone.
Posted by cleome46 on :
20. Inane questions in a mayonnaise jar, under Funk & Wagnalls' porch.
(Outdoor Miner will be safe. He doesn't even like mayonnaise.)
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
19. Hacked into the Legion World system and gave himself 500 extra posts.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
18. Stole the easter bunnies eggs. And given that this is November, I'm already exercisin' them temporal powers.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
17. Ensured that easter bunnies can never reproduce again Posted by rickshaw1 on :
16. Held a sweet sixteen party for Hussein, Arafat, Quadaffi, Amin, Hitler and Lenin.... IN HELL!
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
15. Used the power of good thoughts to make hell freeze.
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
14. Retroactively removed Cos from ever being Time Trapper.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
13. Just won't let this thread remain unfinished!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
12. Crossed the burning Meglasphere battling Octochopper the entire way with no shoes on just to get a roast beef sam'ich! AND NOT A SINGLE LEGIONNAIRE CAME TO MY AID! Damn them! DAMN THEM TO THE LOWEST, DARKEST PITS OF TARTARAUS!
Posted by rickshaw1 on :
12. Took on the most evil, retched, corrupt, vbaile, demonic organization of all to single handedly take them down just to prove a point. Girl Scouts fall before my Time Scythe.
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
10. Used his mighty powers to make the #12 last twice.
Posted by Viridis Lament on :
quote:Originally posted by Invisible Brainiac: 10. Used his mighty powers to make the #12 last twice.
9. does the same to himself Posted by rickshaw1 on :
Sorry, was having issues. It was eating my posts. first one disappeared. Did another one and it disappeared. Now they show up....
My awesome trapper powers are starting to leak throuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
7. His leakage drenches all the other Trappers' robes. Ick!
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