posted
<in orbit, high above Legion World, rotating slowly in ominous silence, hangs an awesome device. From the outside, an observer might readily mistake it for a small moon, were it not for the fact that its surface was entirely unbroken. Inside, however, no such mistake could be made>
<from the hugely geared interlocking mechanical arms describing regular arcs in clockwork precision, to the series of enormous pendulums cutting their massive swaths across the expanse of the floor... there is no doubt that this is the masterwork of a genius... or a madman>
<this, then, is the Omnichronal Orrery of Phineas B. Fuddle>
<slowly, a form materializes. It is Phineas himself, having recently left Legion World. As he fades in, an electronic, yet somewhat soothing, voice is heard echoing through the chambers of the Orrery>
...the Sun's place in the elliptic to the meridian; then that degree of the equator, cut by the meridian, describes the Sun's right ascension, while that degree of the meridian, exactly over the sun's place, is the Sun's declination. After the same manner...
<Phineas shouts>
Spacial tutorial off!
<the electronic voice ceases>
Temporal Regression Status!
<the electronic voice resumes>
Currently at level eight of twelve. Regressive chronometers retroactively engaged at
Heh... I'll wager Exnihil had quite a surprise at Medicus Two... how the sins of our past come to haunt us, eh?
Bring up Seven O'Clock on Visual!
I would actually like to see the little sycophant's face when he saw where he was.
<Phineas looks up at one of the many panels of the Orrery's vaulted ceiling and watches the events of Medicus Two play out. Slowly his grin fades>
Back it up! Show Seven O'Clock again! <watches closely> What is he doing there? He's... leaning in to Cobalt Kid... something is not right, here.
Hmmmm... what does my little pawn think he's up to? Eight of twelve... he is making progress... but I feel that something is amiss. It may be time to activate the Secondary Protocol.
It may be time for my other pawn to be placed on the board...
Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
<even as Phineas speaks the words, Exnihil suddenly materializes from his latest mission in time. Having been nearly drowned at the bottom of Shark Lad's tank, Ex is completely soaked and begins to gasp for air>
UHHHHH!
Uh huh... Uh huh... wuh...?
<he looks around confusedly... half in shock after his near drowning... half in awe at his new surroundings>
-------------------- See Here for the latest update on the 2013 Chicago Gathering (now including tentative attendance list)
Registered: Feb 2008
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Just what do you think you are up to, you insignificant flea?!!!
<He marches across the floor, his steps echoing through the expanse of the enclosure. He seizes Exnihil by his coat and swings him against a pillar>
We have an agreement... and you are dangerously close to violating our terms!!! Just what did you say to Cobalt Kid?!!!
Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
<ex cringes in fear... how did he ever think he could get away with warning Cobie without Phineas finding out?>
Wh... what?
What do you mean... I'm doing the work... I am!!!
I just activated the ninth timepiece at Shark Lad's Tank!
-------------------- See Here for the latest update on the 2013 Chicago Gathering (now including tentative attendance list)
Registered: Feb 2008
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"meh... meh... meh...I just activated the ninth timepiece"
<drops Exnihil to the floor>
Listen to me, you fool... you may think you're getting away with something, but it's for nought. Whatever little plans you hatch... whatever attempts you make to divert the natural order... the Orrery will adjust for.
What do you think this place is?
This is no simple planetarium... within this edifice Time itself bends to one will... my own! If you think that you can alter the plans that I have lain out, you are sadly mistaken.
I know what you said to Cobalt... and even before a single rivulet could form outside of the course of my self-made stream, it was... corrected.
OFFICE OF SECURITY VISUAL!!!
<one panel of the Orrery ceiling lights up and plays out just a single snippet of a scene from earlier today: that of Cobalt Kid burning the message>
Your message to Legion World was incinerated by the very man you hoped would help you. Oh... you fool... did you think you were my only servant? Cobalt Kid is working for ME!!!
<Phineas watches as Ex's face sinks. The lie has worked>
Now... you will complete the task before you... three timepieces remain. Simply activate them, and I promise you... I do promise you... when Legion World is unwritten, you will survive... and have a realm of your own to rule.
Now... Away...
<Phineas waves his hand and Ex disappears. Phineas waits a moment, then his own face sours>
So... Cobalt knows... unfortunate... but not unanticipated. This must be addressed... but how?
I have tried striking against him before, but he has always prevailed. This time... I think... I strike against those he loves...
<Phineas smiles>
[ March 25, 2009, 10:49 AM: Message edited by: Phineas B. Fuddle ]
Registered: Apr 2005
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Nice entertainment system. Great screens! Can we get the Devils/Fliers game on? I'll order a pizza.
From: Vancouver, BC, Canada | Registered: Dec 2003
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posted
No need... there is a DiGiorno in the freez...
what?
<Phineas turns to face the apparation and smiles>
Ah... the Event Horizon approaches.
Many strange things will be seen. Kent Shakespeare may appear in deep space demanding nourishment... Poverty Lad may quack like a duck... and Jailbait Lass... well... let's just see how I may punish this Cobalt Kid!
Away... I have a date with Jailbait...
<fades away>
<a moment passes>
<fades back in>
Or... rather... that is to say... oh, never mind... Away!
posted
<having accomplished his erasure of Jailbait Lass from Legion World's memory, Phineas fades back>
<he stumbles slightly, weak from the energy he expended. He sits heavily into his chair, and watches the great celestial mechanism before him rotating>
Yes, the order is slightly different.
Mary Hatch!
Ha! Phineas, old boy, you are a devious one. <slaps his knee>
But why was it so difficult? SHAKES should be a seat of power... the fourth chronometer is activated there. Even with only nine of twelve, my power should be stronger than this.
<He Shouts>
TEMPORAL REGRESSION UPDATE
<a soothing electronic voice sounds through the Orrery>
Currently at level nine of twelve. Regressive chronometer now engaged at
posted
Yes, Kent Shakespeare… I do believe that a pint may be just what I nee…
NO!
<jumps up out of his chair and storms to the celestial mechanism>
Of course… how could I have overlooked such an obvious detail?
Mary Hatch is a research librarian! A vocation like that isn’t simply a career choice… it’s in the blood.
<scrutinizes the mechanism and finds what he’s looking for… a small steel wire has been snapped. He traces it backward>
No… No… No… No!!!
Mary Hatch… daughter of Niles and Esther Hatch… Granddaughter of Dr. Ezra J. Hatch… a genetic researcher! Tell me he didn’t work in the same lab as… <continues tracing> … oh, course he did!
<Phineas shouts>
VISUAL ON TIMELINE 22 MARK 7! TRACEBACK AND DISPLAY!
<the vaulted ceiling lights up and a scene from years prior plays out>
Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
<Dr. Ezra J. Hatch walks through the halls of a genetic laboratory. He is a quiet man who generally keeps to himself, working studiously away on finding a cure for the Oomarian Flu. But lately he’s heard rumblings of strange goings-on. Talk of the bizarre research being conducted by one of his female colleagues. Genetic splicing… grotesque animal hybrids… bio-weaponry. He’s always been a company man but, if this is true, the lab has crossed a line that he cannot, in good conscience, let continue>
<he comes to the door of his colleague. Locked! Against all better judgement, Dr. Hatch looks both ways to see if anyone is watching, and jimmies the door. He walks into the darkened lab and quickly shuts the door behind him>
<a low hum permeated the lab, increasing the sense of uneasiness he feels. He sees a cage before him, with a small creature inside, breathing heavily. With trepidation he approaches and reads the label on the cage: “Psychotic Beaver”. What? Before he can process the thought, the animal suddenly spins around and throws itself against the bars, growling. Dr. Hatch jumps back in fear but, in doing so, bumps into a small glass tank behind him>
<the tank tips and before he can react, shatters on the floor. A small aquatic creature flaps wildly on the floor, gasping for air. Panicked, Dr. Hatch runs for the door not even noticing the label stuck to his shoe: SharkLad>
Registered: Apr 2005
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If all of the timepieces were in place, this would not matter in the least. I could wipe the whole thing and start over, but I’ve acted rashly. In my haste, I didn’t consider the historical ripples of introducing a new character to this play. Now the entire fabric threatens to unravel.
<the soothing, electronic voice echoes again through the Orrery>
Temporal regression currently at level ten of twelve. Regressive chronometer retroactively engaged at:
posted
Phineas! I am here! I demand...<a cloud goes over his mind with each moment he spends in the Orrery>...I...what is your bidding...my master?
Registered: Oct 2003
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how about a bucket of chicken wings, spicy but flavorful... a meatball sub from Decarlo's on Delaware Avenue, and get Phinny soem green tea... he really needs to unwind and relax a bit.
Thanks, Dark Lard! I'm Tivoing the game so you can watch it after your shift is over.
From: Vancouver, BC, Canada | Registered: Dec 2003
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