quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
we surely would have died, were it not for Abin's ring!

---

Heh heh heh. Abin and his ring, see the incredible tricks he can perform. heh heh heh.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
That wasn't foreshadowing, was it?
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 
What, about the ring? Dear gods I hope not.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
OK.

I'll let it go this time.
 

---

Posted by STU on :
 
[STU quickly sticks his hand in his pocket, hiding the other ring he found]

[ October 10, 2005, 08:39 AM: Message edited by: STU ]
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
"And one to rule them all..."

(Another potential epic months long MMB LMB Quest?--and only 6 posts into this one? )
 

---

Posted by Spellbinder on :
 
I know it's not really our "thing", people, but let's try to focus on the crisis at hand. We should probably try to save the universe while it's still there
 

---

Posted by Frio on :
 
I'm with Cru on that one.

So, uh, how do we do that...?
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Wow, and since I'm now the Assistant Chief of Security for Legion World I don't have to hide out during this crisis...

I get to shoot things! **Squeal of Delight**
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
By the Rainbow Bridge of Asgard! This crisis must not be allowed to destroy my new home.

Do tell me, kind mortals, how I may be of help.

[ October 10, 2005, 09:50 AM: Message edited by: Amora the Enchantress ]
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
<flys by Everyday Girl>

I just redid the budget for the upcoming year, EG, and we'll have top of the line hand-guns for you en masse. And hose cool double shoulder holsters too if you want.

Everyone be careful of the lightning! When it hits it knocks things out of existence. The "Dont'cha just love inane one word posts" thread almost just got nailed!
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
Lightning? Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. Tis but childs play to the Enchantress.

<Waves hands, lightning dissapears -- for the moment>
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
You can help me then Enchantress. Let me carry you around Legion World and you can zap all this lightning away.

Norse? You shouldn't get cold in that get-up then as we fly around.
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
Verily, 'twould be my pleasure. Lead on, then -- but do have a care with thy hands, should thee not wish to suffer a fate worse than being struck by the lightning.
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
You must be new around here--I'm known as the perfect gentleman, usually very shy and subdued around women. You can count on me to watch my hands very closely when I'm holding you.

<flies around Legion World>

It appears right now we're waiting for the others to all gather...
 

---

Posted by Spellbinder on :
 
Cobie and the Enchantress? Why do I sense another crisis brewing...?
 

---

Posted by Abin Quank on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Amora the Enchantress:
Verily, 'twould be my pleasure. Lead on, then -- but do have a care with thy hands, should thee not wish to suffer a fate worse than being struck by the lightning.

---

Cobie is actually very familiar with that fate. Most of us think he rather likes it.
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
My thanks for the information, Abin Quank. I shall remember it, should it be of use to me in the future...Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Compy informs me that the my hour of triumph is at hand. I am arrived to remake the universe in my imag... er I mean help save the universe.
 

---

Posted by Vee on :
 
Enough of this!

We have already lost more than one friend and I fear we may lose others if we don't act NOW!

Cobie, get yer butt in here now! The Villains have been defeated; Red Bee has been brought to justice; QUeen Connie and the Super Pets and Allies Army has rid Legion World of the invasion of lune-i-ticks and temprarily sealed the dimensional cracks in the Legion World Tesseract System; The Grrrgg/Psyonian War has been averted; and the Dalek Project seems to have been scrapped.

In my opinion all of this has been merely distraction upon distraction in order to spread our resources too thin and keep us from focusing on the real problem.

And that is the Anti-Monitor! Yes, the Anti-Monitor (aka the Anti-Moderator) who has always been one of the most fiendishly evil arch villains faced by the LMBP. Time after time, he has appeared to sow strife and calmity through the known worlds, always managing to escape our clutches.

But not this time!

This time we will finally bring him to Justice for all the evil he has wrought. This time, he will be made to pay and pay dearly for his despicable acts. He will never toy with the LMBP again and there will be no more deaths to feed his depraved sense of humor.

Legion Worlders unite! LMBPers, the time for action is at hand!
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
Then let this Anti-Moderator come now and meet his doom.
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
<EDE suddenly appears from here...>

Anti-moderator...

<EDE passes out>
 

---

Posted by Nova Girl on :
 
Looks like we're out of batteries on this one.
 

---

Posted by Vee on :
 
<Vee rushes over to EDE, shaking him gently by the shoulders>

Eryk, wake up! What happened to you? We've been searching all over the place for you.

<Turning to look at the others>

This has to be connected to the Anti-Moderator somehow, I can just feel it!
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
Be there a telepath amongst us who couldst read EDE's mind and find the Anti-Moderator's location?
 

---

Posted by Abin Quank on :
 
Hmmm... Let me see if my ring can detect anything, an energy signature or something we can trace...

Uugg what is that... It looks like drool, a trail of drool... and it leads... there!

[ October 10, 2005, 01:50 PM: Message edited by: Abin Quank ]
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
Well done, Abin. It shan't be long til we do wreak vengance upon our enemy.

Vee, dost thou have a battle plan?
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
Perhaps we may have to go into battle without Vee for the moment...dost another amongst thee have a battle plan?
 

---

Posted by icefire on :
 
The time that I have been preparing for is at hand......God help us all!
 

---

Posted by Spellbinder on :
 
It's best to wait. There are battle plans in place, so it's better to show restraint than to take this Crisis off into other directions. We'll never finish it that way
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 
Abin's ring can detect anything?!!? Tee he he he

You know the best thing about having an alternate self running round with you? There's someone else who shares the exact same sense of purile humour. Ring. heh heh heh
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Spellbinder:
It's best to wait. There are battle plans in place, so it's better to show restraint than to take this Crisis off into other directions. We'll never finish it that way

---

That is a wise decision.

And should I have to temporarily depart Legion World before the battle gets under way, please do not finish the battle before I return.
 

---

Posted by Spellbinder on :
 
The chances of us finishing this quickly are most likely slim
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Considering we are at 2+ pages of inane dialogue already Princess, I'd say that this story is going for the Return of Donna Troy #1 excellence in dialogue award.
 

---

Posted by Spellbinder on :
 
Where can we lay our hands on some washed up Gods?
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
Considering we are at 2+ pages of inane dialogue already Princess, I'd say that this story is going for the Return of Donna Troy #1 excellence in dialogue award.

---

I say thee nay! Return of Donna Troy #1 was brilliant!

[ October 10, 2005, 03:47 PM: Message edited by: Amora the Enchantress ]
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Spellbinder:
Where can we lay our hands on some washed up Gods?

---

I shall extend invitations to my former neighbors in the Marvel Universe, though I cannot promise any of them will follow me back here.

 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
I've just recieved word that the Ancient Caveman Clan of Earth-N's distant future is attacking Cafe Cramer. Who knows what else will slip through? We'll need every LMBer we've got--now is the time to call the role and gather our forces...
 

---

Posted by The Royal Inquisitor on :
 
The axe of the Royal Inquisitor and the mighty girth of Quislet stand ready to wage war!
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
<heals Eryk>

Eryk, did you learn anything? I know you're in pain, but let my blue spirit energy try to help you...

We need everyone assembled stat. Reality itself is being torn apart, and the real threat hasn't even attacked directly yet. I'm thinking a smaller group might be a useful to serve as a distraction/first line of defense to keep the Anti-Moderator busy...
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Lucy... machine... wires... flames... pierce... reality... Nick Lachey... flames... Hypertime Bar... Anti-Moderator... help Lucy... hurt bad...
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Help Lucy? Lucifer Lass?

I...I guess if you say so, EDE! Where do you--

Oh my giddy aunt.

Hypertime Bar? I didn't see that one coming. This is gonna be trickier than we thought...
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Nick Lachey?

That cinches it: There really is a monumental evil at work here that will require the combined powers of all of Legion World to defeat.

If anyone needs me, I'll be at SHAKES.
 

---

Posted by STU on :
 
[STU settles comfortably on the sidelines with a large sweet tea and a bag of Cheetos]
 

---

Posted by Arachne on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Amora the Enchantress:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Spellbinder:
Where can we lay our hands on some washed up Gods?

---

I shall extend invitations to my former neighbors in the Marvel Universe, though I cannot promise any of them will follow me back here.

---

Hmm, any chance of bringing over Malekith? Sure, he's evil, but he's awfully pretty. We could always keep him tied up. 'Sides, a guy who likes to disguises himself as a girl would fit in well here.
 

---

Posted by Theresa on :
 
I don't know what's going on, but seeing as Quis is invovled and he now signs my checks, I should probably help.

[ October 10, 2005, 07:12 PM: Message edited by: Theresa ]
 

---

Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
 
Count me in. Let's sprocking end this.

Btw, given the number of posters popping up in this thread I thought it would be nice to have a roll call thread to make sure nobody gets lost.
 

---

Posted by Clone of R on :
 
Obviously, I'm in. Can't let Cobalt sprock things up any more than he already has...
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
You just don't want me to steal all the glory...

(And good thing too...because I will always throw that stuff in people's faces )
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ohmygod, are we ever gonna do something? Let's get moving people! Mr. Quank showed us where we need to start, so let's hit it!

<Pulls Twin 9mm Berretta VLK Pistols from Holsters and Gestures towards the drool trail...>

Here We Go!!!
 

---

Posted by The LMBP Spectre on :
 
Reality is splitting apart as we know it. Time itself is working against space.

The Anti-Monitor's energy is destroying all things. Now our last ploy to stop this must come into play. Gay-lipso and Lucien Lad, combined into one, only your combined powers of glam and nostalgia can hinder these forces from destroying us all, while the rest of the LMBP confront our enemy and learn how to stop him. The essence of the Spectre has fought the Anti-Monitor before and lost, in a continuity long forgotten. But I can use my power to focus your own and hold entropy at bay.

A small group of LMBPers must stay by our side and protect us from the shadow agents that even now are entering Legion World.

Come Bevis, hold my hands. Together you and I will save all things, and in turn must entrust that we too will be saved.
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
heya, lmbers! nicea you to invite me over to yer forum to play!
 

---

Posted by Caliente on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by STU:
[STU settles comfortably on the sidelines with a large sweet tea and a bag of Cheetos]

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Arachne:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Amora the Enchantress:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Spellbinder:
Where can we lay our hands on some washed up Gods?

---

I shall extend invitations to my former neighbors in the Marvel Universe, though I cannot promise any of them will follow me back here.

---

Hmm, any chance of bringing over Malekith? Sure, he's evil, but he's awfully pretty. We could always keep him tied up. 'Sides, a guy who likes to disguises himself as a girl would fit in well here.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by disaster boy:
....i brought beer.

---

Welcome DB!! The more the merrier. (She said without permission of STU.)
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
Those fools. As they doth fall before the power of the Anti-Moderator, I now make my escape. Should Legion World survive, I shall return. But no matter the outcome, the Enchantress shall be the last of the Asgradians.

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

<dissapears...for the moment>
 

---

Posted by Stealth on :
 
Hi, everybody. Anything interesting happen while I was gon...?

OMIGAAAAWD!

<runs to the sidelines>

Mind if I join you? I brought some bottled water if anyone wants any.
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
hoo. haw.


 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
I let Vee deal with the sidelines people...

In the meantime, I've got to get EDE healthy so we can figure out this hypterime bar conundrum.

It now looks like the Anti-Monitor is attacking and the only people standing b/t him and Lucien Lad and the Spectre is an LMB with only half its members willing to fight...

<picks up EDE>

Willikers! Either Eryk's been working out or that nelly cap weighs a ton!
 

---

Posted by Lad Boy on :
 
Oh, what the hell, count me in as a "fighting member."
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 
What, me, us, standing against the anti-moderator? Ooooooh, I don't know about that. No-one told me there would be anti-moderators, I was around the first time he showed up remember. Can't I sit on the sidelines with Stu and Cali and DB? Oh alright then, if we must.

But we're going to sing show tunes while we're at it. If we're having one of those last ditch battle types things then we shall have fun while doing it. All together now...

Good morning Baaaltimore....
 

---

Posted by Stealth on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:


It now looks like the Anti-Monitor is attacking and the only people standing b/t him and Lucien Lad and the Spectre is an LMB with only half its members willing to fight...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gay-lipso:
Can't I sit on the sidelines with Stu and Cali and DB?

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
It now looks like the Anti-Monitor is attacking and the only people standing b/t him and Lucien Lad and the Spectre is an LMB with only half its members willing to fight...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Stealth:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gay-lipso:
Can't I sit on the sidelines with Stu and Cali and DB?

---

Stu and Cali and DB...and Stealth! Hello, I'm right here.

---

Oh, I noticed you

<runs with EDE>

[ October 11, 2005, 12:47 PM: Message edited by: Cobalt Kid ]
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
Sorry I'm late in getting here, folks. Had to make sure the ski lodge was in order. Does something here need freezing? Let me at it!
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Clone of R:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
It now looks like the Anti-Monitor is attacking and the only people standing b/t him and Lucien Lad and the Spectre is an LMB with only half its members willing to fight...

---

Well that's handy to know.

*shoots Cobalt Kid in the head*

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Clone of R:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
It now looks like the Anti-Monitor is attacking and the only people standing b/t him and Lucien Lad and the Spectre is an LMB with only half its members willing to fight...

---

Well that's handy to know.

*shoots Cobalt Kid in the head*

---

<blocks magnetically>

Kinda not the time clone of 'boot...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
[

quote:

---

Originally posted by Stealth:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Gay-lipso:
Can't I sit on the sidelines with Stu and Cali and DB?

---

Stu and Cali and DB...and Stealth! Hello, I'm right here.

---

Oh, I noticed you

<runs with EDE>

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Stealth:
Thanks, Cobie, I appreciate that, especially considering how busy you are saving the universe. But I was talking to Gay-lipso.

---

Well, you were being Stealthy... or something. Also you were on the previous page and I can barely remember who I am let alone who everyone lese is and where they are at any one time.
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
Could be time for one of my inspirational rallying speeches.

---

Oh gods, Tamper Lad is trying to rally us. Next think you know he'll have a 'plan' and tehn we'll all be doomed. Maybe we should send him off on a secret mission that takes him far, far away until we have dealt with the threat and then he can come back when even his best laid plans are likely to only harm himself.

*Earth 4 Gay-lipso heckles Tamper Lad as he's trying to make his inspirational speech. Tamper manages to ignore Earth 4 Gay-lipso until he starts throwing peanut shells as well*
 

---

Posted by Kid Prime's cocoon on :
 
..............

......... ........

....................
 

---

Posted by Frio on :
 
I agree with KP!

So, when do I get to beat stuff up?
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
<snatches beer from disaster boy>

Well, pretty much how I expected a full blown LMB operation to proceed.

Anybody have an idea how to deal with tall, dark, and near-omnipotent over there?
 

---

Posted by Nova Girl on :
 
<smacks the bug on tail end of his tail with riding crop>

Why don't you try to be more like your metallic friend over there. Sparkly gay demon guys, to shut Tamper up you throw these at him.

<Pulls out several boxes of latex products, balloons, glove and prophylactic devices>

Hmmmm how about a few explosive blasts to knock Mr. Anti-Monitor around a bit. Now why don't you boys charge him while I knock him with these concussive blasts?
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
The only way to shut Tamper up is to kill him, and despite the fact that he's clearly sunk into a Kirbyesque delirium, he still may prove useful.

And I'm nobody's diversion. Get your own cannon fodder.
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
i'd deal wit ya myself, lmbers, but its more fun to use my army!

get 'em boys!
















 

---

Posted by Nova Girl on :
 
Ugly fat men...

<Uses a concussive blast on lead group and charges them. Knocking the remaining soldier down Nova pulls out laser scalpel and emasculates the unconscious soldiers. >

Mmmmm man parts.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Well, there goes our "family" rating.
 

---

Posted by Semi Transparent Fellow on :
 
Darn! And I was doing so well. Up to this point in my life, I'd never experienced pendulous man breasts.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
It's like the guys from "The Lumberjack Song" gone horribly wrong.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Hope no one has a eunuch fetish... oh wait emasculated means she pulled a Bobbit in addition to the making a church choir.

Well there's another wave of those baddies.

Hey Nova, chum the air in front of the next wave with those bits will ya.

<Firing weapon at the testes and dismembered phalluses that Nova tosses at the second wave of man boob soldiers, TL converts them to miniture nuclear weapons blowing the second wave to bits.>
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
And that should take us right up to and past PG-13....
 

---

Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
 
Great. An LMBP battle I'm almost not old enough to take part in.

Come on, guys. Let's buy Cobie, Vee, the Spectre and Gay-lipso some time. I can't understand what they're planning anyway so I might as well have fun blowing up stuff while we're waiting.
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
(db wakes from drunken stupor on grass)

hmmm what's this crinkled paper in my pants? let's see "ladboyxxx@yahoo.com" hmmm wonder how that got there. whats that sound, sounds like a herd of elephants....coming this way

(looks up)

quote:

---

Originally posted by anti-moderator:

---

ew that's just wrong...(hurls beer bottle, striking one in the head, shattering glass all over.) KRACK!!!

well...that's one down. this is almost evil enough to make me get up!
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
I'm pretty sure they don't understand it themselves, IB.

Fight away.
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
...and when did KP start speaking some different language...or did someone spike my beer!
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Those aren't mutually exclusive.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Someone toss some more body parts at that army...
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
them lmbers are doin purty well against my manboobie armie... much better than last time...

good thing it's only the first wave!
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
ill throw some more manboobies at 'em fer the time bein though!









[ October 11, 2005, 08:19 PM: Message edited by: anti-moderator ]
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
foolish anti moderator.

i just had a bunch of KFC fast food delivered to my little pic nic on the sidelines. watch as your man boobies run and fight over the food.

bwahahahahahahahahahaha

<<oh my, i think they are ripping each others limbs off to get at the mashed potatoes.>>
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
They're dumber than we thought, obviously. And that's pretty dumb.

Now, had the chicken been from Popeyes....
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
<Rockhopper confronts one of the Anti-Moderator's henchmen>.

All right, buddy, FREEZE!!!

<He instantly turns into an ice statue, then something cracks>

Ewww! His manboobies broke off!

[ October 11, 2005, 09:38 PM: Message edited by: Rockhopper Lad ]
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ohmygod, I got here just in time!

No One, Nobody, Release the secret weapon...

<The mini-me versions of EDE and Cobie become visable flying just above the hordes of disgusting manboobies. Between them they hold aloft a strange figure.>

...Release Richard Simmons!

[ October 11, 2005, 09:50 PM: Message edited by: Everyday Girl ]
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Everyday Girl:

...Release Richard Simmons!

---

This is getting more frightening by the minute!
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
And if that's not horrible enough I have that high energy Tony Wossname waiting in the wings...

We'll see how many manboobies are left out there after another round of "Sweating to the Oldies"
 

---

Posted by Caliente on :
 
<grabs a beer and some KFC>

Mmm, this is the good life. Here's to hopin' I can stay on the sidelines and won't get called into battle.

Go team LMBP!!
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
My god! The battlefield awash in the sweat of physical exigiencies. Cheerleaders on the sidelines. The battle becoming a titanic struggle of manhood...
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 
Gosh, I'm an evil alternate Earth villain and even I'm scared by the manboobies/Richard Simmons battle. Hmmm, hang on a second...

*The Gay-lipsos go into a brief huddel and then look up with purpose. With a wave of their fabulously manicured hands there is a flash of sparkly light and every single manboobie is turned into a rather hot Scottish man in a kilt with no desire to fight, just to party and have a good time*

Ah, now that's a bit better.
 

---

Posted by Faraway Lad on :
 
Faraway Lad arrives late as usual, and hurries over to Cobalt Kid.

“Cobalt this is worse that we thought, utilising diplomatic channels I have found….”

His voice tailed off as he noticed the happy dancing eating Scotsmen.

“Egads! What are the massed marching bands of the Seaforth and Cameronian highlanders doing here?”

Gathering himself up from the shock of seeing the dancing Faraway continues.

“These manboobies are but the first wave. A message from Ambassador Jeryal has confirmed that there is a huge invasion fleet heading our way. Worse still it consists entirely of ( the picture that must never ever be posted)

We are going to need to call in everyone to beat this back Cobalt. I have activated my legion of the Triumvirate army and the Varangian Guards are holding the space lanes at the Rubicon Asteroid but I don’t really think they can hold out for long against that picture”.

Almost overrun by manboobies dancing to the KFC, Faraway uses his powers to send them Faraway but still the dancing Scottish bandsmen come on.

Looks over to Stu and the rest.

“Come on guys I need a hand here”
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Far, the Triumvirate have deployed our armies to hold back the Zombie Shark Army of Earth-Q_R's distant alternate future! We're being spread thin throughout all the universe! Seahorse just checked in on planet Brighton and he's battling The Witty Worm Men of Wales!

Everyone needs to give it their all! Rally around Vee!

I need a small group to follow EDE and myself--and Far, you're drafted. Your faraway powers are needed now. Any other stealthy or espionage types follow me. The heavy-hitters stay here and the tacticians gather around Gay-lipso and the Spectre.

<runs into LMB Plaza>
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
“Come on guys I need a hand here”

*Applauds*

Oh, sorry, that's not what you meant, is it?

<grabs bucket of KFC. Reaches into SHAKES and grabs minikeg.>

Atten-shun! Rigggggghhhhht-face! March!

<As the now regimented army of Scottish bandsmen march towards the greasy chicken and beer, they each find themselves, in turn, gated to a truck stop in Terre Haute, Indiana. Just because.>

[ October 12, 2005, 06:15 AM: Message edited by: Outdoor Miner ]
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Word just in--

Planet Cleveland, named after the city on Earth that colonized it a millenia ago, have begun to mobolize their army to attack Legion World, in hopes to gain favor with the Anti-Moderator.

Their hopes are to bring many LMBers under their rule and force them to be citizens of Cleveland.

I fear for Outdoor Miner, the most hated enemy of Cleveland.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Hmmm, as a sneaky, heavy-hitting tactician, where should I go?

Heck with it, I'm going with Cobes and Co. Gets me off the front lines, at least.
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
Damn - Damn- DAMN! Methinks my computer is affected by some spatial anomaly fluctuation - and being stuck in another time zone is the pits!

Can anybody fill me in - coz by the time im done catching up, you'll have finished the story

[ October 12, 2005, 06:52 AM: Message edited by: legionadventureman ]
 

---

Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
 
I don't get it either.

(takes a look around the battlefield. see dancing Scostmen and man-boob parts)

Cobie, I'm coming with!

Anything's better than manboobs and men in kilts. Some of these guys don't even have UNDERWEAR on, fer chrissakes. My poor 17-year old mind can't take it anymore.

And neither can my 17-year old stomach. *groan*
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
Word just in--

Planet Cleveland, named after the city on Earth that colonized it a millenia ago, have begun to mobolize their army to attack Legion World, in hopes to gain favor with the Anti-Moderator.

Their hopes are to bring many LMBers under their rule and force them to be citizens of Cleveland.

I fear for Outdoor Miner, the most hated enemy of Cleveland.

---

I'll contact my father and see if my home planet, Planet Houston (whose name is shared by an Earth city totally by coincidence), can help us out again.

We'll see if Houston can beat Cleveland.
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ohmygod, If that cute Invisible Brainiac is going with Cobie then I'm going to the sidelines. Maybe I can talk Caliente into switching to evil cheerleader mode and giving me a few tips on how to y'know...

Oh and before I forget, No One, Nobody open another dimensional rift and send any of those dancing Scotsmen that OM didn't already get rid of to Planet Cleveland...
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
OK, we’ve got Vee, EDE, myself, Faraway, Outdoor Miner and Invisible Brainiac ready for a quick away mission. Darden, you should be able to use your power, and I’m hoping Outdoor Miner can use his in a way that coordinates with yourself so we can pinpoint where we’re going.

We’re going to the Hypertime Bar. It exists outside of continuity and timelines, and has been an intricate part of the LMB’s history in the past. It’s very nature defies the laws of multiple Earths and entropy itself. The Anti-Moderator wants it, although EDE and Vee may know more about why, and I’m interested in hearing about it.

In the meantime, I can encase us with a magnetic shield and Vee can use the Emerald Eye to reinforce that. IB can use his light as a guiding system for you both in a way, so that we can keep track of where we are teleporting to. Don’t try to understand it—it’s science on advanced levels that only Julie Schwartz and Alan Moore can understand.

If I’m right about LMB continuity, and I always am, the Hypertime Bar is currently interwoven into the circuitry that exists in Captain Lightbulb’s speedo. We need to get directly to Captain Lightbulb, and I radioed ahead and got his locations moments before, so we can pinpoint to where we need to go.

Any last minute additions to this crew?

Fire away boys…

Good luck LMB!
 

---

Posted by Theresa on :
 
I've out cold, what's going on, am I going on this little trip...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

What's with the male clevage?!?

(release white energy from her hand and turns some of the booby men into that guy from Brawny Paper Towels)

Don't worry, I removed their axes!

Hey, where are you guys going, can I come, too!
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
Okay, I've been practicing something. Let's try it.

<Gesticulates toward a phalanx of boobie men who become ice statues dancing Swan Lake, arm in arm>

It's an improvement anyway.
 

---

Posted by Kid Prime's cocoon on :
 
That is SO Cameron Mackintosh!

(Oh, sorry...)

.... .. .. ....... ...........!
 

---

Posted by Hrun the Barbarian on :
 
Hrun Attacks!!!

Slicing and slashing with a braodsword he cuts his way through the dancing kilted manboobies.

Picking up one of the huge ugly manboobies he throws him, landing in Cal's lap and spilling her Beer over Tamper Lad.
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
What the Tartarus is going on here? Who are these obese replicants?
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
<watches from mini-omnimonitor>

Get 'em Hrun!

Even with Hrun's bererker rage, things still look bleak! This just in: the deadline has been eaten by entropy! Now this story will be spilling into the weekend and early next week!
 

---

Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
 
And I don't even understand what's going on!
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
But don't let that stop you from joining in.
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
LAM soars aloft over the marauding manboobies, wondering just how the back-up of dancing Richard Simmons clones will turn the tide - or if the manboobies will just turn away in fright!

At the merest touch of his trusty amulet, at least two of the replicants vanish in Irwin Allen-esque fashion - leaving behind a trail of cosmic dust...which is dispersed by the gentle winds...
 

---

Posted by The LMBP Spectre on :
 
*The LMBP Spectre holds tightly onto the hands of Gay-lispo, funneling his power into the anti-matter spheres that are encompassing Legion World. The true nature of Gay-lipso shines brightly, and it is far too fabulous for others to gaze upon. To do so brings certain death!*

"Tamper Lad, others...please protect us as we hold off the Anti-Monitor..."
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
now's the time to start gettin' serious!

<wipes out smurf village>


 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Bah Tamper do this, Tamper do that. She sounds like my former girlfriend. The things I do...

Alright we need a defensive perimeter... Let's see what is left in the aresenal.

<Surveys the chaotic scenes of battle.>

This should do nicely, I can protect the group fighting the Anti-Monitor by using my weapon to slow the rest of the battle down.

<The battlefield excluding the Anti-monitor fight is encased in a huge matrix of collagen protein tightly linked into a solid cube. The booby men find themselves literally swimming in the gel.>
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Those communistic Smurfs deserve what they get.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by anti-moderator:
<wipes out smurf village>

---

There's no use trying to get on my good side now.
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
Do any of the Smurfs post on Legion World? Talk about being a non-sequitur...
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
<hits lmb with crazy monsoon weather>


 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Bah I'll save Smurf village. Nova blow up the dam. Now we can open up that land for logging.

<The dam above Smurf Village is destroyed, putting out the fire. There is only a small price to be payed as the flood drowns the remaining smurfs.>

To prevent the A-M from launching any more anti-matter attacks, I'm having Compy create a magnetic envelope around this battlefield.

[ October 13, 2005, 09:40 PM: Message edited by: Tamper Lad ]
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
I think I can fix this weather.
<concentrates, spreads arms and the monsoon becomes a gentle snow flurry>.

Wow! That took a lot. I'll sit out this next round.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
<Looks around at the gelatinized battlefield, now dry.>

Hmmm threat taken care of for the moment, and Spectre's busy, Nova Girl's busy. No one to boss me around.

<Tunes Compy to hockey game, pulls out a Sleeman's Cream Ale and starts cursing players in Franglais>
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ummm... Mr. Tamper, is dereliction of duty a "shoot on sight" offense?

Just asking you understand...
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
I can multitask...

Dern it, forgot about Deputy Debbie.

[ October 13, 2005, 10:06 PM: Message edited by: Tamper Lad ]
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
Don't fret, Rockhopper, the snow-field is no more, thanks to my amulet...
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
Tamper Lad, do you need an assist, dude?
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
QUIET LAM. don't draw either Nova Girl or the Spectre's attention to me. The situation is in hand for now and the last thing I need is to told to take out the trash.
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Oh Mr. Tamper, Miss Nova left you this note...

And that Nice Miss Spectre said for you to "Pay Attention Canucklehead."

What's a Canucklehead?
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
QUIET LAM. don't draw either Nova Girl or the Spectre's attention to me. The situation is in hand for now and the last thing I need is to told to take out the trash.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by legionadventureman:
Is the Spectre on our side, or does she have a specific agenda of her own...Sorry, just my Psyche-paranoia acting up again :embarrassed:

---

 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
Is the Spectre on our side, or does she have a specific agenda of her own...Sorry, just my Psyche-paranoia acting up again...

[ October 13, 2005, 10:51 PM: Message edited by: legionadventureman ]
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by anti-moderator:
<hits lmb with crazy monsoon weather>

---

ah hell no!

now i know what happened to my powers....

(db senses the powers of the elements begin to flow into his reach)

ahhhh must try harder.....

[ October 13, 2005, 11:19 PM: Message edited by: disaster boy ]
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
The Smurfs! Wiped out just like that! After they so valiantly helped us so many times before…(often, we just didn’t see them)

LAM, it appears you’re caught in some time-loop on page 10—damn Anti-Monitor.

Ev-Girl, kick-ass security sister!

<turns back to others>

OK, Far, OM, send us off…
 

---

Posted by Kid Prime's cocoon on :
 
......... .......... ... ......
...... .... ....... ... .... ......
...... .... ... ....... ... ......!!!
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Hmm... I'd like to buy an "e", Pat!
 

---

Posted by Kid Prime's cocoon on :
 
.... ..., ....!


 

---

Posted by Faraway Lad on :
 
Faraway turns to Miner.

"OK OM, out that three'fer down and lets do this, on the count of three, one.....two...."
 

---

Posted by Faraway Lad on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Faraway Lad:
Faraway turns to Miner.

"OK OM, put that three'fer down and lets do this, on the count of three, one.....two...."

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Faraway Lad:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Faraway Lad:
Faraway turns to Miner.

"OK OM, put that three'fer down and lets do this, on the count of three, one.....two...."

---

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Outdoor Miner:
Look on the bright side.

Considering we had to basically rip a temporary hole in ye old space/time fabric by Faraway trying to move us faraway while I simultaneously brought us back*, it's a wonder we all weren't just ripped apart by contrasting forces.

Besides, I finally have two other people I can relate to. Cheers, me.


* - It's as good an explanation as any.

---

Brillant!
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Guys, can I remind you that we need to be very careful here in the hypertime bar? This place is immune to all retcons, reboots, continuity changes, etc. If you get killed or maimed or changed into a cyborg or something, there's no undoing it. Dead means dead here.
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ohmygod, Invisible Brainiac, you little cutie, like why did your other self run off to the men's room?

Hey! How did I get Here? Why am I wearing this silly headband? Where am I?

Ummm... Is this like a Villians United thing or maybe a Gay of Vengance thing...
 

---

Posted by Caliente on :
 
Wow. Watching from the sideline and I'm still exhausted. And confused. Maybe I'll just wait for the TPB to try an comprehend...
 

---

Posted by Arachne on :
 
We need Cliff Notes.
 

---

Posted by Abin Quank on :
 
Yeah, Where's Recap Kid when we really need him?

[ October 16, 2005, 06:48 PM: Message edited by: Abin Quank ]
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Don't worry folks, I'm sure someone will come up with an LMBP Infinite Crisis Secret Files to answer all your questions.

"Someone", however, will not be me.
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
I suspect we'll meet someone in the Hypertime Bar who will clarify what's going on...
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
It's probably the bartender. Good bartenders know everything.
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
I just want to know how I got here and why I'm wearing IB's Uniform.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Maybe you're an alternate version of you that obtained IB's powers in some way.
 

---

Posted by Abin Quank on :
 
Recap where are you...

[ October 16, 2005, 08:45 PM: Message edited by: Abin Quank ]
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 
I say we get a Time Trapper and reboot the last month.
 

---

Posted by Abin Quank on :
 
Arrggghhh!!!

[ October 16, 2005, 08:52 PM: Message edited by: Abin Quank ]
 

---

Posted by Abin Quank on :
 
Arrrgggghhh!!!
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Have a drink, Abin. You don't sound like yourself.
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
<Back on the sidelines, still quite exhausted from changing the monsoon into a snow flurry>

Thank you for the beer, Cali. Hey, this is nice. I should sit out battles more often.
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
mmmm my dopplegangers are hot!

(juuuuuussst kidding)
 

---

Posted by Frio on :
 
No, I agree! They definitely are Disaster Boy. Maybe one or two would show me their comic collection, sometime...
 

---

Posted by Caliente on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Rockhopper Lad:
Thank you for the beer, Cali.

---

Not mine but you're welcome!! Just like you're welcome here on the sidelines. It may not be as exciting but at least you won't die. Probably, anyway.
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
Fortunately, I brought Mad Libs!

Okay, someone give me a noun!

No? Okay, maybe later.
 

---

Posted by Frenk on :
 
What is going on around here?

They told me I was supposed to have a major role in this Crisis, or at least in Villains United!

I don't know what went wrong, but it must've been my stupid other head's fault!
 

---

Posted by Dyvud on :
 
Shut up, you ugly cuss! If it wasn't for you I might've scored with that hot Satan chick!
 

---

Posted by Frenk on :
 
In your dreams, baldy!

Say, where are we anyway? Who's that hot girl in the headband?
 

---

Posted by Frenk on :
 
Ha! She's looking at me! Why don't you play some Mad Libs and leave me alone?

[ October 17, 2005, 01:10 PM: Message edited by: Frenk ]
 

---

Posted by Dyvud on :
 
Bah! That girl ain't but about 10 or something!
 

---

Posted by Frenk on :
 
Well, I've still got more of chance with her than you did with Lucifer Lass!
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
BAH, quiet you addled dolts. I project I still have a more of chance with the Spectre then you two unfortunates have to hook up with each other.
 

---

Posted by Faraway Lad on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Everyday Girl:
I just want to know how I got here and why I'm wearing IB's Uniform.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Frio:
No, I agree! They definitely are Disaster Boy. Maybe one or two would show me their comic collection, sometime...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Faraway Lad:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Everyday Girl:
I just want to know how I got here and why I'm wearing IB's Uniform.

---

"Everyday Girl my Angel, I have found you at last"

One of the Faraways moved and picking her up hugs her tight.

"My child my sweet sweet child, when your mother and I sent you to that alternative world for your safety, we thought we would never see you again"

Looking across the room,

"We knew the Quanks would be fine honest good people to raise you. Forgive me my daughter we needed to hide you from the evil of the picture that must not be shown and...."


AS he spoke another Faraway suddenly stiffened.

"No" he cried,"this is impossible..............Red Sky's..............It should not breach the Faraway Force...... should be outside all of this observing...........White walll.............coming for me..............AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"


And that Faraway faded from view leaving the others gasping in pain and confusion.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by disaster boy:
they might be straight!!!

---

That is the hope!

Oops, better go help or something... not that I really know where to start. The confusion here is great. Oh, I know!

*chills sideline crew's beers*

There, I'm helpful.

[ October 18, 2005, 11:59 AM: Message edited by: Frio ]
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Mmmm chilled beer. I'm trying this coffee flavoured one here.

Now I don't have to choose between beer and coffee at 7am.

Silly anti-moderator, there's always time for beer. In fact we could have 12 and still stop you.

[ October 18, 2005, 11:55 AM: Message edited by: Tamper Lad ]
 

---

Posted by Hrun the Barbarian on :
 
There is a blast of white light and the sounds of a battle. A rip in the space time continuum opens and then thrown through the rip come the bruised and battered figure of Hrun with a torn and bloody Stoopid Cat.

The rip closes quickly.

Hrun stands up and see’s Everyday Girl.

“Hail and well met daughter of the house of Hrun. Tis meet that warriors shall meet here in the halls of death. We stand ready to die and my heart would have been heavy if I had not seen thou again”

He moved across and placed a large arm lovingly around her shoulders.

“but why dost thou wear the clothing of the southern civilisation” he asked accusingly?

Before he could answer another white cloud energy vortex appeared and dragged Hrun away.

“Remember Child, we love thee, If we die a warriors death then be not sad, but rejoice for we shall meet again in the Halls of our forefathers, we shall……….”

Then Hrun was gone.


Outdoor Miner (all three of them) looked at each other, shrugged and turned back to the barman and asked for three, three’fers

As he cleaned a glass the barman of the Hypertime Bar smiled as he thought………...
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Hey alternate Tamper Lad from the dimension where the AFL and NFL merged, be happy that you still have football to watch.

In my reality the leagues didn't merge leading to the self-destruction of the sport due to escalating salaries in the disco seventies era.

Now where's that coffee-flavoured beer you were mentioning?
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Jeepers! What should have been a straightforward mission to the Hypertime Bar is turning into a confusing, convuluted mess!
 

---

Posted by anti-moderator on :
 
i got yer beer right here, you ingrates!


 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
My God, he's opened a window into the most horrible alternate world of them all....

A World Without.......Beer....
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Sweet Grolsch, I shall avenge thee.
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
oh...it is ON!!!
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Outdoor Miner:
My God, he's opened a window into the most horrible alternate world of them all....

A World Without.......Beer....

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Outdoor Miner:
My God, he's opened a window into the most horrible alternate world of them all....

A World Without.......Beer....

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Hrun the Barbarian:
There is a blast of white light and the sounds of a battle. A rip in the space time continuum opens and then thrown through the rip come the bruised and battered figure of Hrun with a torn and bloody Stoopid Cat.

The rip closes quickly.

Hrun stands up and see’s Everyday Girl.

“Hail and well met daughter of the house of Hrun. Tis meet that warriors shall meet here in the halls of death. We stand ready to die and my heart would have been heavy if I had not seen thou again”

He moved across and placed a large arm lovingly around her shoulders.

“but why dost thou wear the clothing of the southern civilisation” he asked accusingly?

Before he could answer another white cloud energy vortex appeared and dragged Hrun away.

“Remember Child, we love thee, If we die a warriors death then be not sad, but rejoice for we shall meet again in the Halls of our forefathers, we shall……….”

Then Hrun was gone.

---

OHMYGOD!!!! DADDY NUMBER 2!!!! NOOOOOOOO NOT AGAIN!!!!
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ohmygod, they won't let me have any beer anyway, but I've already found and lost two extra-universal, time-lost, "Daddies" to this stupid crisis, so Mr. Anti-Moderator, Yer TOAST!

<Pulls Twin 9mm Beretta VLK Pistols, checks magazines, and ensures very special hand loaded cartridges are chambered>

No One, Nobody, find that azzhole for me, I need some target practice...

[ October 19, 2005, 09:01 AM: Message edited by: Everyday Girl ]
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Wow Ev-G sure has a lot of daddies. Are you guys sure that the Anti-Monitor isn't this universe's version of Maury Povich.

OMG, it makes sense. This whole crisis, all it's been a paternity testing episode of some inane talkshow.
 

---

Posted by Caliente on :
 
Now that is a terrible threat. We must stop him for the good of society!!
 

---

Posted by Vee on :
 
So far, so good. I've been able to stay out of the fray without notice so I can follow the instructions of the Eye. Somewhere around here in the little isolated corner of Hypertme are two others I have to find. Don't know who or why but I better find them fast or it could be all over for life as we know it!


Wait! What's that bluish glow over there in the far corner?

[ October 19, 2005, 12:31 PM: Message edited by: Vee ]
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 
I don't like beer. Ick.

So, I've not been paying attention, what's been going on then?
 

---

Posted by Vee on :
 
"You have arrived...finally," murmured the lady in blue. "Though not as anticipated. We expected another in your place. Does this mean the Empress is no more?"

"We? Who are ...", Vee asked.

"I am the Sapphire Seeress. And she is the Scarlet Sorceress," replied the lady in blue indicating another women in brilliant red that appear next to us. "Together we two and the Empress were destined to meet fate head on at this crisis point."

"Who are you? And where is the Empress?" demanded the Scarlet One.

"Dead. Murdered by someone at the start of this nightmare," I answered. "Her Emerald Eye sought me out upon her death and embued me with her power. And it led me here. Apparently to meet the two of you."

Sapphire Seeress and Scarlet Sorceress studied me and exchanged glances for a moment. Finally Sapphire Seeress spoke again.

"This is not how it was ordained," explained the lady in blue. "But it will have to do. Come we must plan our actions so that we may end this insanity soon."

In a puff of blue, we disappeared...
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 
...I wonder if my friend, the Opal Oracle, with be joining them...

[ October 20, 2005, 05:26 PM: Message edited by: Tempest ]
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Wow, the female Cobalt from Earth-7 is a hottie! And by the way she's checking me out, she's just like me!

Would it be wrong if we, ya know, well...er...ya know.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
So that's the Rhodium Rascal. Hmm a little less trampy then I imagined.
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Jeepers! Will the inbred demon offspring of Cobie and his Earth-7 counterpart be a major player in the post-Infinite Crisis LMBU?
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
I fear that it will! She most likely has the same genetic demon seed implanted by Doctor Hoffman. Imagine both demon seeds combining, as well as the added implications of an inter-Earth breeding--thereby imbuing the child with multiversal energies and stuff!

Screw it, I'm horny!

Be with you guys in a thirty min!
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Bah, why do I subject myself to this debauchery. I still don't think CK is fully functional. I know if I spread myself around around as much him, the multiverse would take on a pleasant green tint.
 

---

Posted by Arachne on :
 


Where's a firehose when you need one?
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
someone rang?
 

---

Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
 
Okay, Cobie and Cobie, break it up.

You'd think female Cobie would've learned not to screw around. Birthing demon spawn must really hurt!
 

---

Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
 
So, the "female IB" is just Everyday Girl. That's a relief.

Then I guess, there being only two IBs here, means the other one is... dead?
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
so if cobie and a non cobie mama makes a demon...what would cobie and cobie mama make??? i cringe at the thought.
 

---

Posted by Amora the Enchantress on :
 
(Amora magically reappears for the first time in a long time)

Hath this crisis finally ended?

(Amora looks around)

It doth not seem to have ended. Ahhh, until then...

(Amora magically dissapears for now)
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Come to think about it, the multiverse could use some more people with a green tint to their skin.

<Looks for a smart, good-looking blonde>
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
&Looks for a smart, good-looking blonde

---

I'm right here. Although I don't have green skin, but otherwise I fit the brief.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Not quite what i had in mind...

I need to procreate an army of little green men and women..
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
<at the Hypertime Bar>

Leapin' jeepers! Time itself is acting all crazy right now! I don't know how Captain Lightbulb's speedo became the Hypertime Bar again, but thank goodness.

Whatever happens now, its for real--there are no retcons here, outside of all things...

(Guess I really did have an affair with Cobalt of Earth-7 though. I can't wait to tell Lardy, since he'll appreciate what a weird accomplishment it is!)
 

---

Posted by Frio on :
 
...stop looking at me Tamper Lad!

I think you need to cool off. *sends a cold front his way* You too Cobalt Kid's squared. *sends one their way too*

Now. Are we done being in a crisis yet? I want to go back to Rockhopper's place and play with the penguins.

[ October 23, 2005, 12:06 PM: Message edited by: Frio ]
 

---

Posted by Reboot on :
 
*lies, overloaded, in the timestream, unconscious.*
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Reboot!

Screw this recapping thing, I'm gonna try and save him!

And he'll have to owe me one
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
I need to procreate an army of little green men and women..

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
Guess I really did have an affair with Cobalt of Earth-7 though.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
NO! NO MORE ALCOHOL.

I have the solution, I've determined the source of the Anti-monitor's powers. Bad things happen because of alcohol.

In fact my earlier lecherous behavior (sorry Chilly) in this thread was caused by a bout with the beer demon.

If the hypertime bar can be converted into the Hypertime Temperance Union, the Anti-monitor will be reduced to a choir boy that we can go to town on.

<TL attacks the kegs and bottles with axes. Booze spills onto the floor as TL goes berserk in a teetotaling rage.>

---

<SLAPS! Tamper Lad smartly>

you're hysterical. get it together.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 







<Zaps Frio with a teetotaler ray, Frio and Tamper start singing a duet...>

... Lips that touch liquor shall never touch mine...
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
the horror! the horror!

Tamper have you LOST yoru mind or has the antimoderator gotten to you.

(db lies down under emptying keg)

"glug glug gulp"
 

---

Posted by Lucifer Lass on :
 
<appears in a fiery burst which only adds to the confused mayhem that the assembled crowds seem to be suffering from>

Sheesh! Things are not looking good here at all!
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Come join us in our Temperance song. I sense the evil of the demon liquor is draining from the multiverse and the Anti-Moderator is weekening...

<Continues to sing with Frio>
Lips that touch liquor shall never touch mine.
 

---

Posted by Lucifer Lass on :
 
<speaks loudly, trying to get the attention of the masses>

ATTENTION SENTIENTS!

Your universes are currently under assault by a malevolent being known as the Anti-Moderator. This creature is the living embodiement of pure formless void, of chaos without structure. He has conquered his own universe and left it to the anarchic whims of his own pet brutish s, the Naturals!

Even now his influence over your lives grows! Many of you have travelled to the Hypertime Bar seeking refuge, for this place alone is a nexus of pure stability in the multiverse. Yet even here the disorder that is the calling card of the Anti-Moderator is becoming dominant.

My friends, there is only one solution to this Crisis. We must impose a coherent plotline on this story! Only through making sense of the myriad of seemingly random events can the Anti-Moderator's influence be defeated. Please... I beg all of you to help me. I have seen what the Anti-Moderator is capable of... we cannot let him win.
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
*Gasp!*

Lucy’s right! And hot! But she’s right!

Let’s go over what we know!

Ahem
Over the last five years, the Anti-Moderator has been an arch nemesis of the LMB, being their most powerful and feared foe. He was responsible for the Crisis in Year Two that killed Foxy Roxy, Lexbose, Silicon Sandra and the Super-Holograms! He was responsible for the destruction of the Remarkable Worlds in Year Three! During the LMB’s Year Four, when they were at their lowest, the majority of them were transported to the Anti-Matter universe, where they saw a horrible place, overruled by the Anti-Moderator and his army, the Naturals. It was then that in the final battle, the LMB destroyed him!

But wait!

The nature of ‘all that there is’ is something far to hard to define. Other worlds, other Earths, other times and other continuities exists. Our very own Earth-2 is known to some as the “Post Crisis DC Universe”. But before this, even more continuities, timelines and worlds existed. These changes, and the subsequent damage and destruction to the timeline, which can easily ruin concepts, lives and ideas, were brought about by a being known only as the Anti-Monitor!

Though the Anti-Monitor was beaten and destroyed, the damage he did was irreparable! Ideas, concepts, continuies…gone! In the blink of an eye.

He died, but yet, he lived. For a being like the Anti-Monitor cannot simply fade from existence. The essence of such a being is passed onward, somewhere, in the grand scheme of what is only known as “the Universal Tapestry”.

Thus, 1,000 years later, on another Earth, in another timeline, in another continuity, the essence of the Anti-Monitor was passed on to a similar being: the Anti-Moderator! The LMB’s greatest enemy lived again! And this time, he held the most destructive means imaginable to destroy them!

to be continued
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Months ago, the LMB re-catalogued their powers, as is part of the daily procedure of being a hero on the active roster of the LMB. There, we learned that Vee had become so in tune with his powers and so proficient in their use, that he could grow things on a molecular level, thus creating beams of growing molecules that, as a beam of sheer force, were in actuality unstable portions of the universe.

During a heated political debate amidst the LMB Constitutional Convention, the LMB were shocked to see Varalent suddenly disappear, leaving no trace of his whereabouts!!

Unknown to any, it was the Anti-Moderator, attempting to harness such power, that whisked him away.

Immediately, searches were planned and such, but nothing seemed to be working. Combined with the growing sense of political turmoil surrounding the LMB, and problems that naturally spring from the daily life of the LMB, such as the search for Kid Prime’s mother, other LMBers away on missions and the arrival of new LMBers such as Everyday Girl, it became harder to coordinate what was happening.

During this time, Eryk Davis Ester, as he always does, uttered the phrase “Jeepers!”, and was magically transported by his Luck Lord far away. For the Luck Lord knew that the only hope of the lay in this destination.

The Emerald Empress also gained immense insight, through the power of her Eye, and immediately took into space to find Vee.

Further, Quislet, Esq. without any reason grew to an immense height, precisely as he planned to announce his engagement to the Royal Inquisitor, now reformed.

During this madness, the sentient known as Banshee attacked Takron-Galtos, in an attempt to free the Red Bee. During this melee, most of the LMB were off-planet, leaving only Cobalt Kid and Reboot to combat them. The LMBP Spectre intervened, and knowing what was to come, sent Cobalt far into space to somehow set plans into motion to stop the upcoming crisis.

While the Red Bee was caught, Takron-Galtos was destroyed, so that the Red Bee could later easily escape his confines.

Meanwhile, Queen Connie, showing some sense, began to gather a large group of Super-Pets and LMBers together to attempt to figure out what was causing insane events, such as red skies, shadow-demon attackers and other such things. In the sewers of Legion World, it appeared as if Caliente and Frio were instantly killed!

Worse, the Morality League of Qward, an elite squadron for the Anti-Moderator had gained control of Abin Quank, in an attempt to harness the power of his ring. Disaster Boy, Tamper Lad and Legion Adventure Man were dispatched to help him, and were soon joined by Stealth and Faraway Lad.

The Red Bee, escaping, found allies in the Riddler and Lucifer Lass, and began plotting to Unite the Villains and destroy the LMB. Unknown to any, Lucifer Lass was working with the Anti-Moderator.

The tears in space and time began to rupture, so that a giant tick army from another dimension invaded Earth.
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
During all of this, Cobalt Kid instantly appeared on what can only be deemed as “The Monitor’s Ship”, and was shocked to find that Eryk Davis Ester was also there! There, they were able to peer into other realities and continuities, as well as watch their LMB allies.

What they saw shocked them! The Emerald Empress, close to finding Vee, was attacked by Anti-energy, as she bravely sought to help the LMBer. There, she bravely died, but not before ordering her Eye to save Vee’s life, and carry out a secret plan that could help the LMB in the end.

In was then the Anti-Moderator realized that his attempts to use Vee’s power and Abin’s ring would not work, and he abandoned his plan. At this point, the away team to Qward was successful and returned, at the exact moment Frio and Caliente seemingly perished, before Tamper Lad’s eyes.

Cobalt Kid used his telepathic link to contact Princess Crujectra, and instantly, many of the LMB learned of her death. With this knowledge, Space Ranger could take it no longer, and became enraged in a fury, preparing to end things once and for all.

At this exact moment, the united villains attacked Legion World, under the orders of the Red Bee and the Riddler.

Princess Crujectra and Crusader were able to join Cobalt Kid and Eryk Davis Ester, as other LMBers, such as Reboot, Faraway Lad and Abin Quank, made their way there. What appeared to be the major-domo of the ship, a being called Bizarro Computo, began to interact with them, and was pushed for answers by the LMB. At this point, Bizarro Computo was revealed to be an agent of the mysterious enemy, who was actually sentient inside Bizarro-Computo. Unleashing an attack, the mysterious entity, killed the Monitor and destroyed his ship, causing the LMB to make their way to a circling asteroid, which overlooked the beauty of Star 69.

One LMBer that did not make it was Eryk Davis Ester, who was seemingly kidnapped to a place known only as Elsewhere.

However, just like the essence of the Anti-Monitor cannot be destroyed, neither can the Monitor! He passed on his knowledge to the Jectra twins, Crusader and Spellbinder! It was such an overload to their senses, that Crujectra shared it with Cobalt Kid through their mind-link.

Immediately, the Anti-Moderator knew that they held that knowledge. Using his mastery over time/space/continuity, he helped manipulate the Ggrrgg/Psyonia War to get them away from the LMB, which worked for a time, as members of the LMB were drawn into that fray.

Back on Earth, Lucien Lad began to act strangely as well, and it was soon revealed why!: because of the weakness of the universe and reality, the barrier between Earth-4 and Earth-1 had weakened and Glamour Puss (the Earth-4 Lucien Lad) had journeyed to Earth-1, kidnapped his counterpart and took his place! Worse, he had control of a powerful black diamond and became the ultra-powerful Gay-lipso! Much worse than that, he had some type of hold on the LMBP Spectre, who had her own reasons for working with him.

This exact weakness in reality caused a race of creatures known as the Daleks to overtake the ticks, and push forth a new agenda, to destroy all the universe and remake it in the image of the Daleks!

Thus, at a critical moment, the universe became imperiled all over! The Villains were United! The Daleks moved forward on their Project! Ggrrgg went to war with Psyonia! Eryk Davis Ester was Elsewhere! Gay-lipso and the Spectre unleashed a Gay of Vengeance!
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
It was up to Vee to rally them in space, and get them back home to work together.

Doing precisely the same at home was Invisible Brainiac, at the Legion World Temporary Command Center, marshalling the LMB forward.

Things became severely chaotic, and nearly every LMBer became involved, whether it was Lash Lad being ‘Too Pretty to Die’ (with the very much alive Caliente) or Tamper Lad and Nova Girl leading a team to Earth-4 to find the Earth-1 Lucien Lad.

In a moment of trickery, Cobalt Kid led the Ggrrgg army into a trap that caused them to be ambushed by Cobalt’s triumvirate army. However, this was only after a bitter fight broke out between Abin Quank and Cobalt Kid, Princess Crujectra and Crusader were disowned by the Psyonia Royal Family and Outdoor Miner was forced to go days without a trace of alcohol.

Another war came to a violent and bloody conclusion, as Queen Connie’s army of Super-Pets and LMBers destroyed the remaining ticks and armies invading Legion World, although they were exhausted and hurt.

Harbinger, Faraway Lad, Reboot and others battled the Daleks, and were able to stop them, but only after confusion, loss of continuity and a shaky plotline were sicked on them. Truly, the Anti-Moderator was at work here.

The Villains used this time to destroy Legion World and hurt many of the sentients there, until finally, Space Ranger had enough. He single-handily beat back almost every single villain on the planet, showing a strength unmatched by any LMBer before. However, it was too much, and the Red Bee and the Riddler used this to their advantage, and killed the noble fighter for justice. Anger and outrage among the LMB ensued, and a team fought their way into the villain HQ, only to see Everyday Girl show that she was not to be messed with, as she blasted the Riddler and the Red Bee with her 9mm and ended the villain war.

The battle with Gay-lipso raged on as well, until finally it appeared as if Gay-Lipso was taken down—but he remained far too powerful to control. It was then that the Spectre revealed her plan: to combine the two Lucien Lads into one being, and use the combined nostalgia powers of them both to somehow maintain the integrity of the universe while the LMB battled the Anti-Moderator!

It was then that the Anti-Moderator truly was revealed, as Lucifer Lass and Eryk Davis Ester saw his horrible visage! Sensing betrayal, Lucifer Lass saved Eryk Davis Ester for her own mysterious purposes and brought him back to Legion World.

However, Legion World was at the epi-center of the anti-madness!
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Chaos! Confusion! Reality falling apart! Time a limp noodle! Division in the ranks!

The LMB, and the Grand Tapestry, were in peril!

The Spectre enacted her plan, and she and the combined Lucien Lads were able to stave off the destruction and hold reality together, while the majority of the LMB battled back the Anti-Moderator!

Then, a plan! A small group, comprised of Eryk Davis Ester, Cobalt Kid, Invisible Brainiac, Outdoor Miner, Faraway Lad and Emerald Vee (now using the Emerald Eye) would journey to the Hypertime Bar, knowing it as the only real thing that anti-matter could not destroy! For you see: the nature of anti-matter is so great, that it must consume everything. But in doing so, reboots and retcons allow the universe to restore itself.

Thus, this gives the anti-matter a continual purposes, to destroy what the universe is constantly recreating.

The Hypertime Bar exists outside of continuities and realities, and is immune to retcons, reboots, endings and mock destructions of timelines. It must always be, for that is the nature of it: what happens there can never be undone!

Thus, the Anti-Moderator realized the ultimate goal! Destroy the Hypertime Bar! For, to destroy the one place immune to retcons and reboots, it would destroy what could not be recreated, what could not be re-fed to it! Which quite possibly could destroy all!

Cut to the most present of presents: Vee has found his own purpose, to fulfill the Empress’s plan, and somehow battle the Anti-Moderator and save reality. The Spectre and the Lucien Lads are holding time together. Reality is collapsing. The group at the Hypertime Bar are now in harms way, as the Anti-Moderator attempts to get to them. All that stands between he and them is the entire united team of the LMB, every member from every era, active, retired, reserve or honorary.

We are at the crux, and we have lost our way. Well, no more! Remember the basics, remember what this is all about, and let confusion fall away. There is a coherent story, and therefore must have a natural end. Let us go to it!

C’mon LMB! You’ve got your story! Give me our ending!

Sweet Ass Sweet!!!

THIS ONE’S FOR SARYA AND SPACE RANGER!!
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
and were able to stop them, but only after confusion, loss of continuity and a shaky plotline were sicked on them.

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cobalt Kid:
The Spectre and the Lucien Lads are holding time together.

---

Are we? Gosh. You learn something new every day.

There's us thinking we weren't paying attention adn we're actually holding the whole universe together.

I suspect we might all be well and truly screwed...
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
who do i have to kill to end this?

<pops knuckles>
 

---

Posted by Gay-lipso on :
 
Probably almost the whole of the LMBP. That would be the most efficient way.

That being said we'd probably only get retconned back into existence a week later so it might not be worth it.
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Great Kaiser's Bun! We're in the Hypertime Bar! Dead means dead here! There'll be no bringing back anyone who is killed in this place!
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 
I do believe Banshee was trying to kill Red Bee.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
*Three Outdoor Miners, all of whom look exactly the same, continue to teleport keg after keg to various locations on the World Without Beer, working to resore that world to normalcy and hide the brewski from Tamper*
 

---

Posted by Arachne on :
 
First things first!

[Wraps Tamper Lad in webs]

Quick someone pour whisky down his throat! That should snap him out of this madness!
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Gakkk... Gakkk webs....

Keep Singing Frio. We must prevent the Anti-moderator from destroying the Hypertime Bar. After we destroy all beer and whisky, we'll get women the vote.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
There's a joke there about compounding errors, but I value my skin too much to make it.

*continues to 'port away brew*
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 



Take that Anti-Moderator.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
You know, Tamp, you just may be confusing "Anti-Moderator" with "Anti-Moderate" here.
 

---

Posted by Arachne on :
 
I think I would have noticed if Legion World women somehow lost the right to vote.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Dread not, I have just surrounded the Hypertime bar with 1,000 angry Kryptonian suffragettes. (Do you know how hard it was to charter those bloody streetcars to come out here?)

Anyways I told them that if the A-M wins, they will never get the vote, which is true from a certain point of view.
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
<Rockhopper Lad steps gingerly in.>

Poor Tamper. I think the strain of being an evil genius has finally gotten to him. Fortunately, before we left HQ, I grabbed his Reboozerizer Ray. <zaps Tamper and Frio with the Reboozerizer, they both stop singing>

Frio: Rockhopper! Can we go back to your place? I had a sudden craving for brandy!

RHL: I've got Frio. I'll take her back. What's Tamper doing with those Kryptonian suffragettes?
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
The Official Line is that the Kryptonian suffragettes are here to win their freedom from a cold patriachal society.

Off the record, I've cleverly manipulated their desire for reform so that the LMB can use them as cannon fodder when the A-M finally shows up.
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Jeepers! And here I figured Tamper Lad brought the Kryptonian chicks here for breeding purposes!
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Well, someone will have to be there to comfort the survivors.

Unfortunately for Tamper, it'll likely end up being Cobie.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Is that all we can think of around here, releasing our gonadal lust.

I knew I should have listened to Nova Girl and summonned the Daxamite Castrati Chorus to protect the Hypertime Bar instead.
 

---

Posted by Frio on :
 
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold the phones. Singing... booze gone... a world practically not worth living...

*shoves an icicle up Tamper Lad's... somewhere uncomfortable*

Jerk. Making me sing and... whatever. You stink. Thanks for the offer Rockhopper Lad but I think I need a rest and a a good stiff drink before I can go anywhere.

Besides, I don't want to miss the show.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
Is that all we can think of around here, releasing our gonadal lust.

---

quote:

---

I knew I should have listened to Nova Girl and summonned the Daxamite Castrati Chorus to protect the Hypertime Bar instead.

---

Oh, like that would make a difference.
 

---

Posted by Caliente on :
 
<rushes to Frio>

Are you okay??

<glares at Tamper Lad>

Do that again and I burn your butt!! Honestly. You and your stupid evil genius ways.
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
I'll join you in a drink in a moment, Frio, Cali. Right now, I'll take advantage of Tamper's current--ah--indisposition and relieve him of his Temperance Ray. <Takes raygun; freezes till it disintegrates>. There are some technologies we're better off without.

[ October 25, 2005, 08:21 PM: Message edited by: Rockhopper Lad ]
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Cali please burn my butt now, if you would? It would help with this icicle Frio has placed in a most uncomfortable position.
 

---

Posted by Frio on :
 
Agreed!

*sniff* It was so horrible. The singing. Like I was there but not in control. *clings to Caliente* Soooo horrible. I'm going to have nightmares.

*has a stiff drink* ... *then has four more* Muuuch better. Better hurry Rockhopper Lad! Tamper Lad got to most of the good stuff.

Bastich.
 

---

Posted by Caliente on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
Cali please burn my butt now, if you would? It would help with this icicle Frio has placed in a most uncomfortable position.

---

You wish. Hmmph!!

<consoles Frio from her place on the sidelines>
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Hey you destroyed my prototype temperance ray. I was planning to take that to Utah World to demonstrate it to the authorities there. There was a strong possibility they were going to equip all their missionaries with them.

EGI was going to make a fortune on that technology.
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
Tamper, when this crisis is over, why don't come up to the Rookery for a few days? I think you need a break. I have a new female ski instructor who moonlights as a cheerleader.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Er i don't think so, no time for debauchery...

Kryptonian Suffragettes! Protect the Hypertime Temperance Hall...

The Anti-Moderator may take your lives... but he'll never take your ballots.

[ October 25, 2005, 09:08 PM: Message edited by: Tamper Lad ]
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
Tamper, whose side are you on? They're trying to attack us!

<Rockhopper frowns slightly>
FREEZE!!!

<All the Kryptonian Suffragettes turn to ice statues>

Fortunately, my ice powers are magic-based. Works better than Kryptonite. If we need them thawed out later, we'll do it.
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Leave my suffragettes alone. If they come after you it's only because you're a member of the paternalistic patriarchal hierarchy.

Cobie, watch yourself. Some un-named person may have told them about you. And the suffragettes may have inferred that Ev-Girl would seize power in the Security Office should something happen to you while you were at the hypertime bar.
 

---

Posted by Lad Boy on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Tamper Lad:
Er i don't think so, no time for debauchery...

---

Is there any doubt why we're having a friggin' crisis?
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Usually, though, it's someone's debauchery (I'm lookin' at you, CK) that gets us into these situations to begin with.
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
A few demon children and bloodlust filled brides and no one ever lets me live it down...my libido isn't *that* bad, is it? (er, that's rhetorical )
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ohmygod, is this crisis over with yet? Some of us have like lives to get back to.
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
I summed it up two pages ago, and no one's made a move since, except Tamper, whose doing Valor knows what over there!

In the meantime, want to show my how you use that 9mm so well?
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
Ohmygod, **Looks Around** Okay, but where is "My"?

And like who is "My"?
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Er, 'My' is my latest bodyguard who works directly under me at the Security Office. She's a lovely young lady and could a few lessons in flexibility when it comes to her offensive techniques.
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
I'm really glad My has progressed so nicely! I remember how scared and timid she was when she first came to the Legion World Orphanage!
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
I've worked long and hard to get her to loosen up around here! It's a good thing I've been looking out for her all this time. Another great perk of the Legion World Orphanage, brought to you by the Triumvirate.
 

---

Posted by Everyday Girl on :
 
MmmmHmmm... The Legion World Orphanage, yep, I remember that place.

So then I assume My's full name is My Whee Fem, the little half Korean, half Philipino girl who had the bunk next to me, years ago.

Sure, Mr Cobalt, I'll help her with shooting. But if I remember right, she's like a whiz with her butterfly knives.
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
<The trio of Miners, huddled together at the bar, break and approach the assembled team.>

OK, I think we have an idea. First, IB needs to..

<The explanation is cut short as an interdimensional rift suddenly opens behind them and pulls the three into it. It immediately closes afterwards.>*


* - To be continued. Elsewhere. Maybe.
 

---

Posted by Invisible Brainiac on :
 
Eh? Miner just called to me!

Cobie! We need My! She's important somehow. I'm not sure how, but...

(Suddenly, reality ripples, cutting IB off. The whole bar vanishes in a flash of light, and when it ends, IB is replaced by... Invisible Babyac!)

Goo goo!
 

---

Posted by Faraway Lad on :
 
Gaa gaa” says Tamper Toddler.

Cutie Caliente baby is happily sucking her own toes whilst Diaper Disaster Boy is living up to his name.

They have been transported by the chaos that is the Anti Moderator to the Super Nursery of Space where the Three Outdoor Miners were taken. It is the Miners worst nightmare come true for Halloween. Trapped in a place of pink fluffy bunnies, nursery rhymes and twee wallpapers. Nothing to drink but milk, nothing to watch but Barney DVD’s and no one to talk to be dribbling, pooping, crying babies.

A disembodies voice booms out.

“Yah Boo!” it cries triumphantly, “Chaos rules, you drool. Now I shall teach these tots to speak and the first words they shall learn are “Me rikey R……”


But before we can find out what these words are we return to
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
When last heard from, LAM was fighting these really huge, really ugly clones of some mountain man guy...Can someone PM me to put me up to speed as to what's been going down for the past two weeks? Coz i hate missing out on the fun!
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Check out page 18 for Cobie's summary!
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
I did, EDE...I might just go with the flow for the time being...Those manboobie dudes are all cosmic-dusted now?
 

---

Posted by Cobalt Kid on :
 
Ever since that summary, I've been exhausted...and can only hope the LMB can finish off this disaster!

In the meantime, I'm going to hang out with that Rosemary girl from Earth-7 that all those old people want me to get to know. In honor of yesterday's Halloween craziness of course!
 

---

Posted by Abin Quank on :
 
Can we PLEASE change the title of this thread to "Kill this Infinite Crisis"
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Abin Quank:
Can we PLEASE change the title of this thread to "Kill this Infinite Crisis"

---

Oh, Abin, you speak for so many...
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
Time passed. Perhaps.

There was nothing but the Nursery. A small window to the outside (placed there to torture them?) showed that what lay beyond the walls was nothingness; a formless void. (It was a familiar sight to at least one of the Outdoor Miners, but that is a tale for another time.) Unable to get their bearings in non-space, the Miners knew they would be unable to step back to the Hypertime Bar, or anywhere else for that matter.

There was nothing but the Nursery.

Time passed. Perhaps.

The Miners, devoid of the usual targets for their sarcasm, turned on each other for a time. But that invariably caused the babies to cry, which none of them could take. Petty vandalism proved no solace either; shredded wallpaper would mysteriously reppear whole, decapitated stuffed animals would regenerate. They became.....adjusted to their lot. Carefully, if listlessly, they cared for the babyfied LMBPers; secure in the knowledge that they were loved by the Purple Reptile God, and that they loved him in return.

Time passed. And then....
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
.....a figure shimmered into view near the ceiling, and then crashed to the floor. The babies began to cry from the interruption of their naptime. The Miners, as if coming out of a stupor, slowly turned to face this intruder, who was tentatively rising to his feet.

He, for it was a male, was dressed in a blue and red costume that was ripped in several places. His lower lip was bloody. His left arm hung limply at it's side. He looked around.

"Where....where am I?" he stammered, before his eyes settled on one of the insectoids. "Miner? Miner, is that you?"

The bug's eyes flickered, as if he was trying to remember details from a previous life, which in a way he was. Finally, something clicked. "Fuh...fuh...Faraway?", he muttered.

"Yes, yes it's me! My God, Miner, what's happened to you? Where are we? What..."

Faraway stopped short as he saw the other two approach him. "More of you?", he said. "Then you did reach the Hypertime Bar! You can get us there!"

"The....bar?" Something about the word bar pleased Miner greatly, though he was having trouble remembering exactly why. His reverie was interrupted by a sharp backhand from Faraway's good arm.

"We don't have time for this, dammit!", cried Faraway. "He's coming, and the bar might be the only place we can hide! Now get yourself together and let's get out of here!"

"um....excuse me?", came a tentative voice from the window. It was one of the other Miners. "Should that be out there?"

"Should what be out there?" snapped Faraway.

"um...that missile-looking thing.", said the Miner, backing away as Faraway limped to the window.

"Oh no," he said. "He's found us."
 

---

Posted by Outdoor Miner on :
 
The babies continued crying.

"You two!", shouted Faraway, pointing at the Miners nearest the cribs. "Get the babies and bring them over here!" He turned to the Miner nearest him. "Now! Help me open a gate!"

"What...gate?"

Faraway slapped him again.

"Focus, bug! When I count three, I'm going to send us faraway and you're going to bring us back here. Got it?"

"Ok. Slap me again, though, and I'll 'port this baby bottle somewhere unpleasant."

Faraway allowed himself a smile. "That's the Miner I know. Now, on three. One....get those kids over here....two.....three!"

Faraway moved them faraway.

Simultaneously, Miner moved them back.

The missile struck the Nursery, rendering it to dust.

*************

The patrons of the Hypertime Bar may or may not have been surprised to see four infants suddenly appear amongst them on the floor. It wouldn't have been cool to show it in any case. But they did step in to look after their lost ones.

Of the three Miners and the Faraway, there was no sign.


(The question of who "He" is, and where the Miners are, will be answered in the Onevision "The Three Miners". Should I ever get around to writing the thing. In the meantime, Infinite Crisis continues here.)
 

---

Posted by Tamper Lad on :
 
Pounds head...

Dammit... okay someone just kill the anti-moderator in the confines of the bar and the crisis will be over... and I can get back to scheming ways to improve legion world.
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 
This thread is going no where fast, I say you just throw the top secret Anti-moderator destroyo bomb and be down with it.
 

---

Posted by Vee on :
 
The Anti-Moderator materialized in the now deserted Hideway Bar.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAAHA! Finally I've succeded! The LMBP is no more! Legion World is no more. I can just wipe this place clean and start everything over with no one left to remember what once was the best Legion stronghold in the multiverse!
 

---

Posted by Vee on :
 
NOW!!!!!
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
Who are you people again?
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 
(accidently drops the Top-Secret-Anti-Moderator-Destroyo-Bomb)

Opps...

(runs for cover)
 

---

Posted by disaster boy on :
 
(watches anti moderator shrivel and wink out of existance.....)

drinks anyone?

(some things never change)

[ November 07, 2005, 07:18 PM: Message edited by: disaster boy ]
 

---

Posted by Rockhopper Lad on :
 
Wow! That was fabulous!

Tempest, I'm going to have you named to the Order of the Ice Floe, the highest honour the Penguin Colonies can confer upon an off-worlder, for this!
 

---

Posted by legionadventureman on :
 
I repeat....Who are you people again?
 

---

Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
 
Well, I'm sure he hasn't just retreated to the beginning of time to prevent our reality from ever taking place or anything...
 

---

Posted by Tempest on :
 

quote:

---

Originally posted by Eryk Davis Ester:
Well, I'm sure he hasn't just retreated to the beginning of time to prevent our reality from ever taking place or anything...

---

quote:

---

Originally posted by Eryk Davis Ester:
Well, I'm sure he hasn't just retreated to the beginning of time to prevent our reality from ever taking place or anything...

---