Remind them not to bolt their food.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
let us not forget the bismollians, miss cramer.
all right, who has an etiquette dilemma?
Posted by MLLASH on :
I have this friend who has TERRIBLE B.O. Plus she doesn't shave her legs....
How should I go about letting her know that the dirty hippie look is WAY outdated without hurting her feelings?
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
bismollian orthodontia?
i am advising coming clean, lash - you are using this advice column as advance advertising groundwork for your tub webcam site aren't you? without even offering incentive. for shame!
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
Mekt, I have learned that the Khundian ambassador will be attending EDE's Kitty Christening Party. What is the proper form of address for the ambassador? And would you consider this a formal occasion - white tie, black tie or come as you are?
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
It occurred to me, Mekt, that those last two "zz" in Ranzz are very appropriate for someone who likes to zap. (Or sleep, of course). Perhaps this was all pre-destined.
You are very polite indeed, always addressing me as "Miss Cramer". Perhaps you're a southern gentleman of the old school and we should be calling you "Colonel Ranzz".
Posted by Blockade Boy on :
Hmmm, I have been trying to find away to talk to a friend about a personal hygene issue.
Seems He (for example, not naming names) just recently turned to permanent metal and has been, well, collecting body wastes. Certainly there must be social protocals that deal with this very common afflication.
What to do?
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
***Sigh*** It looks like Mekt might be on the lam again...
Posted by superboymddjr on :
HEY, I WANT that lightning lord smiley! So Cool!
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
for the first meeting with the khundian ambassador, follow the ancient and universal (and so simple!) method: address her, him, or it as madam surly, mr. surly, or ambassador surly. after being introduced, khund society accepts and in fact encourages a grunt as a greeting. please remember to use the formal rather than the familiar tone, though!
the degree of the formality of the party is determined by the host. since the host will likely be calamity king, you can't really go wrong because he almost certainly will.
(if it helps, the khund ambassador will most likely be wearing his/her/its ceremonial dress weapons. it wouldn't hurt to keep an eye on the cat, by the by.)
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
thank you for the kind words, miss cramer. i am a villain, never a cad! i am content with my current title, however. i got it the old-fashioned way - i gave it to myself!
(i must confess that i do think my name is rather zappy! and i certainly wear it better than garth.)
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
hygene? protocals? all this protean-bismollian (them again?) splicing does sound tricky, doesn't it?
ah but it isn't. etiquette is about making others feel comfortable, remember. turn yourself into metal and begin collecting body wastes yourself. perhaps you can trade, or hold conventions. and mekt has no objection if you create a new market by advertising your wares' collectibility on eUniverse.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
since i just know someone will ask:
start eating the fork the furthest from the shingle and work your way in.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
please do not tell me that you have no etiquette dilemmas as I know better, i do read this board you know. so let's hear it, lads and lasses.
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
People are embarrassed to display etiquette ignorance.
Mekt, sometimes you're here and then you're gone for days at a time ....perhaps you could post your schedule or leave the number of your social secretary?
By the way, if one has in one's social circle a police officer who has changed from female to male, is it acceptable to ask questions about this? Such as, Do you think you'll change back any time soon?
It would help with planning future dinner parties, you know how tiresome (and gauche!) it is to have an odd man or woman at the table - by that I mean odd in number, not character. I always strive for the eccentric addition at my parties. However, I don't wish to offend.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
quote:Originally posted by Fat Cramer: It would help with planning future dinner parties, you know how tiresome (and gauche!) it is to have an odd man or woman at the table - by that I mean odd in number, not character.
i have heard that. by any chance are you winathian, miss cramer?
Posted by Eryk Davis Ester on :
quote:Originally posted by Mekt Ranzz: the degree of the formality of the party is determined by the host. since the host will likely be calamity king, you can't really go wrong because he almost certainly will.
Hey, wait just a second! I just realized I'm being made fun of on threads I haven't been reading! Is this happening all over the place?
Posted by Thriftshop Debutante on :
I don't think Mekt was mocking you, EDE. He was simply recapping your powers. You know, like your sig.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
Posted by Thriftshop Debutante on :
Mekt,
Should I?
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
oh, i don't see why not.
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
You know, Mekt - I think you and I belong to a more genteel age. Kids today don't care about good manners. You should see the dining room at Legion World - one despairs for the future, truly, one does.
Perhaps a position at the Legion Academy for you? I'll talk to RJ and Winema.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
beloved instructor mister ranzz? that does carry some appeal.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
do i appear more professorial this way?
the moustache has some of that retro charm, but i'm not sold. and - will it tickle?
hmm, how sexy would I be with glasses?
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
Shouldn't this really be "Good Conductivity"?
And ditch the lip brush, makes you look old.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
thank you for the suggestion, miss cramer. i do fancy the title as it stands, though.
now shall we return to the etiquette dilemmas of the denizens of this board? why yes!
Posted by superboymddjr on :
hmmm say, Mekt, about the equiette, is it true if anybody visiting Winath needs to be NAKED all the time...? If so, may I sit next to you NAKED? Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
i'm afraid i don't quite follow your syntax.
i do, however, have the feeling that what you are requesting isn't etiquette advice.
Posted by superboymddjr on :
oh...okay from what I read...in the Legion Annual, the people who are visiting Winath, it is customary for them to take the clothes off and roam free across the agricultural field...is that true? You're the expert and you're from Winath. So I wonder if it is rude for me to keep clothes while I stay in Winath?
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
it is an almost universal rule (except in those reverse-societies) to make your guests comfortable, so no.
near-nudity is practiced in private settings on winath. (no standing in line at the dmv in your underoos.)
Posted by Thriftshop Debutante on :
Are there Lightning Lord UnderOos, Mekt?
Posted by Emerald Empress on :
Only at Discount-a-Ranzza
[ August 31, 2003, 09:11 PM: Message edited by: Emerald Empress ]
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
i think mekt skivvies are a fine idea, but there's no licensing deal so at this time you can't buy lightning lord underpinnings.
unless - mom, you wouldn't!!!
oh, i'm kidding. love you, mom!
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
Mekt, I've noticed that President Wazzo doesn't use her phantom powers lately. She used to walk through walls on a regular basis, when she was Ambassador and Vice-President. Is there some rule or social constraint on the U.P. President regarding display of super-powers?
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
when it comes to rules and/or etiquette i'd put nothing past that winema wazzo.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
i've been doing a little research into social mores of your times to better understand you, my readers.
here's something i've learned:
good manners at cards
if you must drum, join the army! if your inclinations run to massage, rubbing other people's chins and foreheads may prove profitable; at a card game there is nothing to be gained by occupying yourself on your own face this way, except the disfavor of the other players. slapping and waving the cards is an irritation to those who are losing; gentlemen do not intentionally nettle the unfortunate. hold your orations in the town hall. fortune telling is prohibited by law; if you are wise enough to know just what your opponent is going to play each time, perhaps you can use this foresight in leading him to play the cards you wish to get. in a word, affectation and mannerisms attractive of attention are not pleasing to others, and may mean fewer invitations to games, regardless of playing ability. modesty and simplicity of manner are essential traits for those aspiring to popularity.
Posted by Su on :
I know this is more for etiquette but I suppose in a way this is sort of an etiquette issue... I know this girl, lets call her "A" and this guy, lets call him "B". Now, B is obviously infatuated with A. When she comes around he loses his concentration and we practically have to slap him to get him to notice anything other than her. Now I *think* that A likes him but doesn't realize that he likes her. She's afraid of upsetting him so she won't make a first move. Likewise B doesn't seem to realize that A likes him because he's somewhat of a social recluse. The problem gets worse because A is throwing her life away. She hates herself for a mistake she made and she won't allow herself any pleasure. Likewise B is always cranky and to put it bluntly, he needs to get laid. I think that if these two got together they could help each other through their respective problems. What should I do about this? Should I speak to one of them and explain my observations to them and suggest a course of action? If so, which one should I speak to? What would you do, Mekt? luv, -Su
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
nun of the above.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
...modesty, propriety could lead to notoriety you could end up as the only one...
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
Mekt, there's something of the artiste in you. I'd love to hear your rendition of He Ain't Proty, He's My Brother.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
(can I trade him for a protean? )
Posted by MLLASH on :
There's this guy, see, I met him on a message board. There's no denying the spark between us. I can feel the electricity in the air when we chat. He's a hottie, plus he's a bit psychotic... in a sexy way.
He's a little overly obsessed with being single, though.
How best to put the mack on this guy and show him that being part of a pair isn't so bad?
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
this is veering a bit from the etiquette focus here but i do wish to help. you see, although you did not name names i know who the other party is. lash, that computo would be no good for you. not at all! i believe i also heard he is already permanently partnered with some sentient. and who needs a 1000110101-timer like that?
Posted by Leap Year Lass on :
Surely we could all benefit from more Mektiquette.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
oh, surely.
please post your conduct conundrums and i will advise. no problem is too big, small, weird, or stinky!
Posted by MLLASH on :
TAKE IT OFF!!!!
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
to what do you refer, lash?
Posted by MLLASH on :
Your overalls.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
i don't suppose you wish to borrow that item of from my wardrobe and are about to ask about the appropriateness of said garment at a particular function?
Posted by Leap Year Lass on :
Since we are speaking of clothes, is there a generally accepted idea of what do wear to a reboot?
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
come as you are (and may never be again)
Posted by Thriftshop Debutante on :
If you're from a place where everyone is you and you and everybody and no one(?) remembers to RSVP, who(?) gets the blame?
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
the dog?
Posted by Fat Cramer on :
Your guidance & counsel is urgently needed by the new legionnaires, Mekt. In response to a letter from one Jacob R. (featured in Pamphlet #6), Rokk replies:
... the Public Service... allows adults to steer kids away from rebellion and towards lives of quiet inaction where the free exchange of ideas has been supplanted with this notion that protocol and decorum are civilization's most sacred ideals. Well, Legionnaires unite against that crap.
Surely you could clarify for the misguided Mr. Krinn that protocol and decorum can, nay, must happily co-exist with the free exchange of ideas.
Posted by Mekt Ranzz on :
i'll simply second what miss cramer stated, with a cavaet. it's a terrible death, to be talked to death; i'm looking at you, rokk krinn.
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