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Author Topic: Alternative Employment for Out-of-Work Legion Characters
Fat Cramer
Rich and flaky
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Mekt, I've written to Bill Willingham to recommend you for a gig in Fables. Unfortunately, the Snow Queen is taken, but the Adversary is still up for grabs.

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Holy Cats of Egypt!

From: Café Cramer | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Greybird
Brother of Dawnstar
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Hey, sis!

I took a message for you, while you were out. Go see Circadia Senius at the Time Institute. He's got a job for you.

Some high muckety-muck U.S. politician back in the early 21st Century can't seem to find the weapons of mass destruction that he told everyone would be found in ... somewhere in Greater Mesopotamia, I think.

Circadia said this guy sounded urgent, but his English was hard to understand. Even with the translator on line -- it kept rebooting. Somehow the word "nuclear" was getting it all confused.

It sounds promising, but I wonder if even you can find something this vague. Besides, didn't you say you'd never help out theocrats again, after that experience on Kol? This guy sure sounded like one.

Love ya,
Grey

From: Starhaven Consulate, City of Angels | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Monkey Eater Lad
Gorilla Griller
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Hey Bouncing Boy, how do you feel about Jenny Craig? Look at Christy Alley's career...hmm, maybe not.
From: Alameda, CA | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Tamper Lad
With the Scarlett Faction
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Saturn Girl,

"Bubba" from Arkansas is seeking someone to be his life-long companion and potential first lady of a major nation.

Requirements:

Thick skin to endure non-stop political attacks
Smart enough to act as unelected co-president
Must be able to turn blind eye to Bubba's sexual indiscretions and have a don't ask policy regarding interns

This is a once in a lifetime opportunity requiring you to subsume your own ambitions for 8 years. However Bubba anticipates that at the end of this term there is a substantial opportunity to launch your own leadership ambitions.

From: Canada | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Mekt Ranzz
singular.
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oh, miss cramer, haven't i been "the adversary" long enough? yes it is the classic story (fable?) of brother versus brother et cetera et cetera but that riff has worn thin and i am so much more than that.

perhaps i should return to my advice column. you sentients still need help.

From: out & about | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lil'rhino
I love everybody & you're next!
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Now that Tenzil quit, perhaps he'll become a senator or maybe even president of Bismoll!!
From: elizabeth,nj | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Set
There's not a word yet, for old friends who've just met.
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Sodam Yot calls up Tenzil and asks him to help destroy a bunch of indestructible items that he's been guarding for the last 1000 years.

Turns out he's been sitting on Oa to safeguard a hundred or so Black Lantern rings. Only Tenzil can save the day, the way he did with the Miracle Machine!

Tenzil Kem, Legionnaire, Chef, Celebrity, Senator-at-Large, and Destroyer of Indestructible and Dangerous Relics of Power!

Registered: Aug 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Quislet, Esq
Great Calamity Kittens!
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Duplicate Boy,

Kinko's wants you for their new spokesman.

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Five billion years from now the Sun will go nova and obliterate the Earth. Don't sweat the small stuff!

From: Boston | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Set
There's not a word yet, for old friends who've just met.
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Bouncing Boy and Duplicate Damsel appear to be out of work now as well.

Bouncing Boy has been offered a job as a flywheel. He'll store kinetic energy, being kept in a vacuum-sealed chamber, bouncing 24/7, and when the local power-grid needs the energy he's holding stored, they'll slide a panel into place and he'll bounce into it a few times, bleeding off some kinetic energy. When he's lost enough energy, he'll be allowed a brief break, and then a Daxamite tourist will punch him again when his break is over, filling him up with thousands of tons of kinetic energy, and sending him caroming around his vacuum-sealed chamber...

Duplicate Damsel has been offered a position cleaning up an oil spill. She's to create 10,000 duplicates and send them swimming into the spill, swallowing as much oil as they can before they pass out, at which point they will vanish, taking the oil with them! Brilliant! (Matter-Eater Lad was their first choice, but turned them down. He said that all that oil would mess up his complexion and give him zits. Bismollan zits are no laughing matter. The last outbreak put forty people in the hospital!)

Registered: Aug 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
future king
Excuse me but can you please direct me to the La Brea Tar Pits in Los Angeles?
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Maybe Sun Boy should start up a hands-free BBQ starter business. It would save on gas and other natural energy sources.
He could probably do, oh I don't know, maybe 150 - 200 homes a day?
[Cool]

From: ontario | Registered: Feb 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Kid Quislet
Vote for Mighty Mog
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Blok - Spokesperson for his own line of "SunBlok 3100." With an SP rating of 3100, this product protects all sentients from adverse solar radiation, even those with the most sensitive membranes. Also useful for sidewalk repair!

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"My dance card was getting fuller than a contestant's at a Jandan shurg-off." - Exnihil, The Lost Klordny

From: Frederick, MD | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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